thethinkingjew

I have also studied some parts of psychology. I do admit that whilst some of it (evolution and our ‘likeliness to other species’ etc) is apikorsus I do believe strongly in CBT and other types of therapy.

There is absolutely no kefira in CBT, it is a talking therapy in which patients are able to identify why and where their behaviour is the way it is. It looks at the way a person sees a situation and how that affects the way they react towards it.

I think that therapy is a very taboo subject as in some of frum environments especially with regards to shidduchim it is seen as a stigma.

However if I had a child reaching shidduchim age and had something wrong or needed a certain behaviour corrected as it would later on affect his/her relationships with others I would suggest a therapist. We all worry too much what others will say and that often becomes a hindrance on a person’s life. One always has to think what is best for me and my circumstance rather than thinking what will ‘yenna’ say.

I’ve got loads to say on this because I can’t stand to see other Yidden suffer because they are too proud to speak out when they need help!!!

Maybe we should open a new thread??!!!

from shir the new shlomo yehuda rechnitz album – El hanar hazeh

i dont know if its right for me to post those sort of things on an open forum.

In my opinion you have to be extremely careful how you rebuke someone, especially on the matter of tznius as it is quite a touchy subject especially around people who don’t keep the halachos to the fullest. Tznius is a hard mitzvah for women so before you are quick to judge look behind and see the real story. Once you know the background of the people, only then can you judge and rebuke.

Make sure your tznius is up to scratch as well before you do anything otherwise you will be dubbed a hypocrite.

Also be tactful in how you approach the subject. the word tznius switches lots of people off and they dont listen.

BeHatslacha.

whilst you are on the subject of the good and the bad of middos can anyone please explain where the good is in the middah of kaas – anger?

amazon has a uk site as well. most companies accept visa/mastercard they may charge exchange rates but they should accept.

HY”D

if the mazal tov is for you then a girl should answer brucha tehai and a man would answer boruch tihiye.

got stuck in an elevator as a child so not too keen on those…but dogs are my biggest fear!!

hey keep climbing. just want to let you know that you are not alone in the world. there are loads of people who feel like this on a day to day occurrence. you are just one of the BRAVE ones to speak out about it. good on you!!!

talking it out is a really good idea and i know there are lots of people on here trying to help you out but sometimes professional help is more worthwhile. Get a new therapist, someone who will understand you and be able to help you. it is easy to work out if you and your therapist are not ‘compatible’. often when you discuss the same thing over again you get stuck in a rut and the therapist’s job is to move you on from that so you can get to the root of the problem. discussing the same thing again and again doesn’t always have its advantages. the therapist needs to help you focus on a different aspect and help you feel more positive about yourself. so if your therapist cant move you on maybe its time for you to move on. i know this sounds corny but i want to say it anyway: you may be short but ‘great things come in small packages’ think positive and it will be positive. we want to help you on here but we also want you to help yourself. talk therapy or cbt are really useful to overcoming some of these anxiety issues.

and finally last but definitely NOT least DAVEN!!!! even when no one else understands Hashem is there for you and He put you in this situation and you have the tools to handle it. Ask Him to help you!!!!!!

sorry if this is all a bit repetitive!!!

wishing you continued hatslacha!!! you will get there..just hang on.