I am terrified. Not about what will happen in the election on Tuesday. Not about the rising antisemitism across the world. Not about Hamas, Iran, or any of their terrible allies. I am terrified of the machlokes in Klal Yisroel that is boiling over.
There’s no need to cite mareh mekomos to understand how destructive machlokes is. Chazal tell us again and again that it consumes both the righteous and the wicked, and it has been tearing apart the Jewish people for over two thousand years.
Let me be clear: I am not taking sides, nor am I claiming to know what is right or wrong. The question of military service and the proper path forward is far beyond me—or any individual. It is for the Gedolei Yisroel to decide, and our obligation is to follow their guidance faithfully.
But what frightens me is what we are witnessing: Jew fighting Jew, publicly and painfully, for the entire world to see. That alone should terrify every one of us. There is no way such conflict ends well. Maybe this is part of Hashem’s plan, maybe it’s what we deserve—but as a nation, we must try to find a way to make peace before tragedy strikes.
So here is my small thought. It may not be much, but perhaps it’s something.
We cannot solve the great national issues on our own, but we can make peace in our own circles. Let’s show Hashem that we are ready to sacrifice for shalom.
If you’ve had a falling out with a business partner, a friend, or a relative—pick up the phone. Try to make peace. If you have no one you’re at odds with, seek opportunities to extend kindness to those outside your usual circle. Invite the family no one ever invites. Let go of a grudge when you’re not included in a simcha. Be more understanding of those who don’t share your views or minhagim. Give others the benefit of the doubt.
If we as a community show that we can love every Jew—not only the ones in our shul, not only those who think like us or serve Hashem like we do—then our machlokes will be proven to be l’shem Shamayim. And perhaps that will be our greatest protection in these dangerous times.
Yes, we must follow the direction of the Gedolim and never compromise the honor of Torah, even when it leads to disagreement. But at the same time, we can counterbalance that with an overwhelming outpouring of love, respect, and compassion—for every Jew, no matter who they are or where they come from.
If we can do that, maybe Hashem will look down and say, “They are My children, and they want peace.”
Signed,
A Terrified but Hopeful Jew
The views expressed in this letter are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of YWN. Have an opinion you would like to share? Send it to us for review.
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12 Responses
Chovos Halevovos Shar Habitochon will help your fear if it’s coming from a rational place. If it’s an irrational fear, psychotherapy & medication can be very helpful.
Always a wonderful idea.
I’ve written about this more than once to the local fjj and JewishVues. It’s unfortunate that the Torah leaders are not respected and valued anymore, that every Joe Schmo gets up and contradicts them publicly based on their feelings. Such a thing was unheard of only a few short years ago. But the fighting stems from these roots, there are people that choose to go with what our talmidei chachamim say, and there are those that throw them to the garbage. Is that who I should make peace with?
Well written! You are 1000 percent correct. Another point: No gadol Hatorah, no bracha, no segula, no magic can help us, as individuals, to get rid of this mess of Avodah Zarah (called selfish/self absorbed/self WORSHIP). Judaism 101: G-d Will only Help those who want to help themselves (Haba Metaher, meseyin Oto). There is no such a thing as a free thing! Without the first step which stems from our OWN TOIL (Bechol lev, nefesh, meodecha), nothing will work! NOTHING!, unless we take the first step ourselves. Each one of us need to learn Tanach, and midrash with owe and fear (as recommended by Rav Chaim ZL) in ADDITION to our Gemarah and HALACHA. The learning MUST penetrate the HEART (veshavtem Al Levavchem). We also need to pray harder with LOTSSSS of Kavanah and ask for Seyata Deshmaya to refine our midos. THIS IS A MUST. This was the advise of the Gedolim in EY when the COVID broke out. For ladies they recommended to work on Lashon Hara & Tzenius. How distractive these fancy shetels and brands are. The Yiddishe mind has the power to take this Tumah of Esav straight from Hollywood and magnify it by 100. Chazal tell us this fake look will change a person’s INNER personality and contribute to our SELF WORSHIP. Never mind how much they are machshil our young men that need to focus on what I just mentioned. This is the ONLY way to get out of Self-worship and develop self respect and eventually respect for other Yiden. And only after that we can finally declare Hashem Melech. Pay no attention to politics and work on Midos. We have no choice. Hashem is telling us something. We are in a state of SAKANAH and I beg all men do their parts and all women do theirs! Please. We need each other!
To Rebemes: Yes that is exactly who you should make peace with. Just because someone is misguided doesn’t mean we can write them off. They are jews and we need to care for them and help them see the proper path. Go learn the gemara brachos 10a with rabbi meir and bruria and how to deal with wicked people. How much have you davened for them?
@rebemes: Please let Hashem be the judge of who does what wrong. That’s the point of this article. Are we 100 percent perfect with our observance of Mitzvos? So who are we to judge others and find faults in them?
The Chaffetz Chaim said that when you take a child and place him in the midbar, he acts confused. We are all confused. We are in that Midbar, called Galus. We are ALL disoriented. I’d say love him and make peace with him regardless. May be, through peace and love you will be zoche to mekarev him! Your job is to love, make peace, and work on your middos. Hashem will take care of the rest!
The Torah doesn’t call for the love of the wicked. I don’t know where you guys get this from. Someone who embarrasses and belittles the chief rabbis is supposed to be excommunicated and ostracized from society, not hugged and coddled. Of course it would be nice if there was peace. But you don’t love someone who spits at your father
The sinas chinam of todays generation is rachmana litzlan worse than the sinas chinam that caused the second Bais hamikdosh to be destroyed, so how can we expect mashiach to come when there’s still so much baseless hatred in klal yisroel?
FIX IT: by knowing with honesty that whatever reason the hatred exists Hashem made it happen and it’s for your good or to trust you and that’s why we are sent down to this temporary physical world, to be tested just like Avraham avinu was tested from leaving his home without even knowing where Hashem was sending him to. All the way to giving up his only son Yitzchok-who he waited 100 years to have-as a korban to Hashem, and how does Avraham avinu do it? WITH LOVE AND FAITH from waking up early in the morning to go to the akeida to reaching out for his knife to make his son Yitzchok as a korban to Hashem until the Malach stopped him at the last moment.
The letter writer is correct, if we want mashiach to come bkarov then we need to love every yid in klal yisroel from frum to frei to reform today chasidish etc…. and be one loving nation together doing serious Teshuva and Achdus together so Hashem can send Mashiach already b’karov
Why do you feel a need to “counterbalance” the Gedolim’s instructions???
@Rebemes: “I don’t know where you guys get this from”. I am sorry. However, you are still listening to yourself. Please forgive me for using a rough language. “phatogre77” already give you one source. Gemara in Brachos 10a.
Furthermore, you worry about Bexuy Hachamim. Focus on Torah, gemilos Chasadim, and Tefilah. Look, we ask our young people not to go to army and focus on these three things. Machlokes and Sinaat Chinum will only make the bad behevior worse. Rabbi Elyahoo Dessler stated that in your heart you should make peace and love those Reshaim. Because Chivuv Halevavot will Mekarev them. Again, I ask you his question: how many times have you davened for them to do Teshuva? Again, I ask you my question: How many times you have Davened with Kavanah that you should do Teshuva on your own, Chatayim, Peshaim, V’Avonos? Please think about what I said before answering. The gemerah tells us that Rav trained his eyes so that he can not see pass his own 4 Amos. Focus on yourself!
@ Rebemes: Another point. You characterize another Jew a Rasha and he does the something to you, and you both want justice. We will never get any where that way! The stamp of Hakadosh Baruch Ho is EMES, Justice. Chazal tells us when there is a clash between emes / Justice and Shalom, SHALOM WINS !!! I can keep going on giving you million other reasons why we should focus on ourselves and not others. But, please think about these very few basic points.
Who was the gadol hador in USA after Rav Moshe Feinstein ztl? Who? Name that person.