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Beautiful poem saysme really poignant, congrats on reaching 1000 posts everyone! kudos to dancinggirl for starting this thread.
Im sorry but I just had 2 make this thing in 2 1,000 posts.lol
s2021, thanks, and glad to see you here!
kapusta, I’d love to, but I’d rather not give out that information in public. You can always contact me through my email at Soundcloud.
SaysMe, what an emotionally packed poem. It is so hard to deal with anything when we don’t have someone close to talk to and lean on. I know that all of us here might not be considered “close friends”, since this is an anonymous forum, but you can definitely talk to us and we will offer everything we can. I hope you are able to get someone in the real world that you can feel close to and open up to, and have those feelings of friendship you seek.
Shticky Guy, nice poem, and glad to see you here. I once thought like you too, and felt that all the “depressing” poems just make this a sad place, but I then saw it in a different light. I see it now as an opportunity to offer people support who are going through difficult things, aside from just being a thread for poetry. This is a really great support group, and I feel that I actually make a difference here. I think we have all had positive impacts on each other here, and have all improved a lot. So yes, it is nice to have some upbeat and positive poetry here, but I think that it’s the more serious and heartfelt poetry that really makes this thread worthwhile.
just read over what i wrote- it was 3 am after all. Hope it didn’t make anyone else wince too much! Thanks Goq and MP- didn’t even start out as a poem about how i was feeling, and it wasn’t completely… I hope too that i can find someone in RL who can be here for me. And soon.
And MP thanks for verbalizing the positivity of the venting side of the poetry thread!
Shticky i find it very cathartic to write about one’s pain through poetry I get what you are saying but that’s why this thread is special you don’t have to put on any airs you can lay it all on the table without fear of reprimand or disapproval. There are plenty of happy threads here and i certainly enjoy those but this thread is about baring your soul and showing empathy to others.
What I Know From Marriage:
Petrifying
Dreamy
Trapped
Overwhelmed
Loved
Scared
Safe
Anxious
Satisfied
Carefree
Full
Utterly Alone
Warm
Idependant
Betrayed
Confused
Giggling
Stress
Anger
Hard
Trust
Blushing
Shock
Luxurious
Tears
Cherished
Heart Pounding
Impossible
Fog
Content
How am I to try again??
S2021- that really portrayed a not-so-good marriage. You know why ur are to try again? Because thers someone out there with whom you can feel all the possitive feelings you mentioned without the negative ones. Personaly, I experienced only the negatives on ur list, but I picked myself and ill try again because I know that there’s someone out there who will share a wonderful and loving relationship with me, I have no doubt. So go on and tell urself there’s a wonderful spouce waiting for me and its just a matter of time.
SaysMe:
“nomtw- scroll up, i posted after purim :). Thanks so much for asking. Itturned out really nice in the end though it had a slow, late start. If i’m still here next yr, i wanna go visit that someone earlier and longer to get that geshmak for longer. How was yours???”
Glad to hear!
Eh, could’ve been better :-/ My family has a really ‘cool’ way of creating drama from nothing…
SaysMe, no problem!
Goq, agreed.
s2021, wow, those sure are a mix of emotions. But everyone has those emotions, to a degree. The difference is how we channel those emotions, and how we deal with them. It is all in our grasp to to use them for our benefit, and when we do, marriage can be a truly wonderful thing. May G-d give you the strength to find the way toward a new beginning, and channel every emotion for good.
PE, blabla, how are you both?
think- thanx! I told myself that and it calmed me down a lil. But why have u no doubts? I mean I said that to myself the first time and… So as much as I THINK it will be positive i dont KNOW. Ya know?
nomtw-oh no, yours too?? And here i thought we were the only ones! 🙂
yuck, sorry it wasn’t so fun :(. I know how that can ruin the atmosphere… This year i did things different and am glad it worked this time!
S2021- well now that u look back, did you see anything beforehand that was the tip of the iceberg of the issue?
I know I did and I didn’t act upon it because I was advised it was ok. This time, if there’s something bothering me, I know that I won’t overlook it.
S2021- If everything was fine and only after tying the knot did the trouble start, ur right I understand ur fear of the second time. On that note I’d like to share something with you.
The Baal shem tov says, that when a neshama is upstairs many malochim redd it shidduchim. And since a malach is of great importance what they suggest must come true in at least a small form before it marries its bashert.Now, some “come true” by someone thinking of the shidduch. Some come true by someone redding the shidduch. Some come true by actually having the two meet. And some come true by the two actually getting married to eachother for some time and then they can move on and marry their bashert. (Baal shem tov ki saitzai) this vort has kept me upbeat since I heard it shortly after that fateful day and the way I perceive it is that I’m one step closer to my wife to be. I hope this will help.
A friend’s betrayal hurts like a spear. Yes, that’s me and my blood gushing down that narrow pathway with my “friends” gazes following it. And its my pain that they splash in and rejoice in. Seriously, I’m working on a project for school with a few other girls-2 of which know that I’m constantly running to appointments with therapy and nutrition yet they’re being abnoxious about it. I totally regret telling them anything! They’re yelling at me “we’re just as busy as you are and we all manage to come…” and I just keep apologizing and rearranging my nights again and again. I’m really really hurt and frustrated. Moral of the story-if your friend tells you personal stuff-its for a reason and don’t be sick about it! 🙁
Thanx Middle path. I didnt think of that, ur right!
Thinkfirst- Wow. Ur good at this. A little logic to calm my imagination.. Yes that did help!! Thanx for the responses 🙂
Btw Goq- u said it very well! I feel the same way!
Blabla-(and just so u know I feel really uncomfortable calling u blabla because ur poems r absolutely breathtaking. U r incredibly talented! I have no idea how u create such masterpieces. They r all amzing and after I read one Im always like whooooa how does she do that?? Just sayin)
I know what u mean w the friends. I experienced some of that. Its not fun. Im sorry u have to go through this. I learnt not tell ppl personal things easily because not everyone is sensitive enough to understand or know how to deal w it. Also I wait for a friend to earn friendship before I call them a friend bec a friend i can have expectations of but other ppl I cant. If they dont react apropriately it bothers me less when its just someone I know saying these insensitive things then a close friend.
blabla, I’m sorry about what you’re going through with your friends. The bottom line is, no one can ever really know how much you go through without being in your shoes, and therefore, they just can’t fully understand, no matter how much they think they do. So it’s wrong for them to judge you in any way and expect something of you just because they do it. If there was a way you can communicate this to them, maybe they’d begin to understand that they really can’t fully understand what you go through, and therefore, shouldn’t judge you.
s2021, thanks. And I hope you continue to stick around this thread, you have really wonderful things to say!
blabla- to continue from MPs post, if you realize that they can’t really understand fully, it could help you to deflect some of that hurt. It sounds like they are just frustrated with trying to get together and doing the project and are so caught up in that, they are acting insensitively. Of course yoi can’t compare, but realize they are frustrated and short on patience, and therefore snapping at you. No relationship never has its bumps and hurts, but i think after this project is done, they may realize how they acted, and you can then tell them how you felt and why it was hard for you and if you make up, your friendship can become even stronger. I’m sorry for your hurt :(. Hatzlocha!
blabla- maybe try talking to them. it sounds like they just dont understand you at all and if you dont say what is bothering you they’ll never know. just a suggestion. i find that when ppl are mean its USUALLY because they dont think and are insensitive by mistake.
puppy- welcome back!
What happened to all our other posters, btw? i don’t wanna list a bunch and risk missing someone, but what happened to observanteen?
puppy, glad to see you back here! How are you?
SaysMe, I wondered about observanteen for a while as well, I was under the impression that she left the CR completely a couple months ago. I don’t know about the others.
A friend of mine once said that something bothers you when you know you wouldn’t do it. A few (good?) friends taught me a lot about myself this week. 🙁
MP, thanks. Honestly, I don’t even have a good way to get to the person I was thinking of so for now anyway I think I’ll put it on hold for a bit.
Hope everyone has a good Shabbos.
nomtw- How are ya? wishing you a gr8 Shabbos and good stuff with your parents this week!
mp-you’re really positive and encouraging, you know? just casually mentioning a hard time in passing then moving along. Hope the Pesach blues have lightened up for a bit!
shticky- I will try to post a positive poem this week. It just might be about something random like butterflies or snow!
s2021,think first– sorry I can’t add to the convo, but davening for good news from all of you + Goq. Have a gr8 shabbos! Hope all is well!
blabla- we haven’t heard from you since. hows it going with your friends? how are you doing?
kapusta- ouch :(. Hoping all your friendships only improve this coming week. i’m sorry your having a hard week. ((hug))
Wishing everyone a good shabbos and an amazing week. I love sunshine!!
Wow! What a an amazing and uplifting shabbatton I was at this week. Ill pass on a few key points you may appreciate.
Marriage- to make ur relationship better,like a bank account, deposit more don’t withdraw from it.
Never say an isulting comment especially in front of others, the hurt can last a lifetime!
Ur wife is not ur servant, she’s ur best friend who happends to be happy to also be the cook, babysitter etc. Appreciate her doing these things and verbalize it.
She married you and not the things you can buy for her.
Never say, why can’t you make money like so and so, and never say why can you keep the home neat like so and so.
Stay physically and mentally atractive to ur partner.
The first thing you say when you meet at the end of the day must be positive, then you can say ” I lost my job” or “the kids were climbing the walls”
MP and SaysMe, Thanx thats nice of u!
Thinkfirst-impressed! Who spoke?
Hi!!! I’m in the midst of being busy 😉 wanted to just say hi and thinking of you all here…
SaysMe, just quickly read your poem on page 20. You write so well!! How are you?? T.O.Y!! I hope it’s only got better. I love how you express that you want to give as well as take… you talk of “mending your ways”, and of being ashamed, and of wanting connection with G-d again, – i hope you aren’t still feeling like that. Assuming you’re talking of something in particular, firstly, whatever a person has done – he can always return. REGARDLESS of how far he’s gone. We don’t make “bad” mistakes, we only make “not great” mistakes – there’s a difference. We can learn from them and become better and stronger from them. I wish you all the luck in the world!!!
Shticky Guy – i like your poem, and i like your point. I also see the other side , both are right i suppose.
Batseven, lol.
Middlepath – thanks for the shout! It’s appreciated! How are you?
S2021 ;( 🙁
Puppy – hey, hi!
NoOneMournsTheWicked – hello again!
Kapusta – how are you?
Blabla, you seem to have matured since 😉 keep going and keep growing!
ThinkFirst, sounds great.
Shticky- my happy poem
okay, it’s old, i didn’t just make it up. but does that still count?
a smile
it brightens her face
brings a glow from within
shining, radiating
her eyes sparkle and dance
sending forth rays
of warmth and kindness.
and then, it captures another
giving comfort and support.
the second feels the love
and her joy begins to spread
the smile grows
her eyes too shine
she seems to rise above the gloom
she has been touched
by the small gesture.
others look and wonder
at the two now connected as one.
what has gladdened these hearts
and let them rejoice
like stars in a blackened sky,
illuminating the world,
lighting a path for other?
one small smile can make all the difference. anyone is able to five this gift, and everyone needs it. so when you see a saddened or downcast face, spread the love to others.
S2021- These were parts of Rabbi Pesach Krohns speech.
PE-I don’t see how its immature to be offended by your friends being insensitive to your feelings. I discussed it with my therapist who put things into perspective a bit and I am trying to stick up for myself to them.
SaysMe, thanks! I really got past it and I’m actually doing pretty good now B”H. How are you doing, btw?
PE, thanks for asking. Doing good B”H. 🙂
Blabla, i’m sorry i didn’t mean that at all!! I meant to say since a while ago, since you’re other posts a couple of months back!
Saysme:
“nomtw- How are ya? wishing you a gr8 Shabbos and good stuff with your parents this week!”
Hey! Doing good, been on break from the CR while immersing myself in piles of homework lol. I actually went away this shabbos to a married sibling so it was a great weekend. I’ll be home this coming shabbos for the first time in three weeks so…. *Fingers Crossed* Thanks for checking in! How are those daily milestones going?
P.S-“…….like stars in a blackened sky”- Something very hauntingly beautiful about that image..
Princess Eagle:
“NoOneMournsTheWicked – hello again!”
Hi!! 🙂
kapusta, thanks. Keeping it on hold for now is fine. And I’m really glad you’re doing better!
SaysMe, thanks so much, and your poem is really lovely, it has a wonderful message.
Think first, those are all excellent things to keep in mind for a marriage, thanks for sharing. If I may, I’d like to add something else: One should realize that the biggest gift he can receive is the act of giving to the other, because that gives back the gift of love and appreciation. Always be on the lookout to do things for the other person that will make them happy, because that in turn will make you happy.
s2021, thanks!
PE, hi! I’m doing alright, thank G-d, thanks for asking. How are you?
blabla, I don’t think PE meant what she said in a negative way at all, I think she just meant to state how far you’ve come over the past months. It really is incredible how far you’ve come, you are an amazing person.
No One Mourns, I’m glad you’re back! That’s great you had a nice weekend.
Thanks MP 🙂
hi everyone! im doing ok (most of the time) tnx for asking.
saysme, that poem was really nice. keep it up. u shud make more of them.
S2021- from what you’ve described,seems like you went through a extremly tough marriage. I’m sorry that happend and, I assure you with time and talking it out you will feel the good old you again. Personally it took quite a few months to feel myself again. a stranger you once knew, I like that line.
(Some people are strange and some are stranger)
thanks puppy.
S2021- so glad u are overcoming that and reaching a safe, comfortable place and feeling. May it continue getting better and better
puppy, glad you are doing okay.
s2021, wow, that must be very stressful for you, to be seeing him everywhere, but I am gladdened by your last line. It so great that you see your ability to move on and overcome those previous feelings. You are a very strong person. I sometimes have a similar experience, with my dad.. sometimes I see him in places, and just want to run away. Thankfully it doesn’t happen that much. May things continue to get better and better for you.
Syag, I miss you around here.
s2021, wow…that’s some use of imagery! (Everyone in here writes so well!)
I’m sorry you are going through such pain, but like MP wrote, I’m glad you are moving away from the trauma and overcoming the anxiety ridden feelings. Keep Strong!
How’s everyone else in here doing? SaysMe? Middle Path? Goq? Blabla?
No One Mourns, I’m doing alright, thank G-d. Very busy with school, which is a good thing. How are you?
I gape,
in disbelief,
I just can’t accept it.
OUR GADOL!
One of our gedolim!
one of our pillars of support!
our torah!
our teacher!
our leader!
he’s gone!
he’s no longer here to guide us.
We were holding on by a thin tearing string which has now been almost completely severed. Rav Scheinberg-from up there, have mercy on us, your children who miss you dearly, Daven for us! We can’t go on without your tfillos!!!!!!!!
MP:
Glad to hear 🙂
Oh man, me too! I was actually taking a study break when I posted that comment. What’s getting me through is knowing that I’m in the homestretch (But I def agree with you-when things get tough school is a very good security blanket for me..)
i dunno, this school load is getting to me. I need to pesach clean and am short on time! And my bf’s wedding is before pesach too!! Too much to do and wayyyyyyy too little time
No One Mourns, that’s great you’re in the home stretch! I’ve still got at least another year and a half.
SaysMe, it’s all about prioritizing your time. Hope you’re able to get through everything smoothly!
Seems like this thread has been seeing less attention lately. blabla, PE, Think first, kapusta, s2021, hope all’s well.
MiddlePath- thanks for asking. Everything is good here, just been busy and couldn’t post much. Now that I am here, I’m wishing everyone a relaxing and restful shabbos!!
If ever I could take a peek
past where the curtain falls
and see beyond the velvet cloth
the writing on the walls
If only I could catch a glimpse
behold the other side
the Weaver’s hidden reasons for
loose threads and knots untied
If I could take a few steps back
to view the canvas so
and see the blur take on a form
the colors start to show
I know my heart would understand
why things are meant to be
the truths declared in echoed tones
behind the tapestry
I know my heart would comprehend
the seeming random lines
my eyes would find the purpose
and the pattern of the signs
But in my heart I also know
it beats inside of me
there’s only just so far
that the eyes are meant to see
the curtain isn’t what is real
and the obscurity
plays but a very minor role
in what’s reality
Another layer covering
the endless verity
the unfathomable essence
of REAL sincerity
I take my place behind the pane (pain)
the glass is really air
and know the streaming rivulets
will turn the window clear.
Just me- i loved your poem, very my style. i loved the rhythm and rhyme and your wording. i also loved the way you brought out your message! right on!!
JustMe, that is really a fantastically written poem! And a genuinely excellent point you brought out. The metaphor with the curtain really is a good one. Thanks for posting it here, and I hope you can contribute more! And welcome to this thread.
If ur feeling down and not in the mood
Go for a jog u really should
40 minutes and you’ll feel refreshed
All ur worries you’ll forget
Move around its really good for ur feel
After a workout you feel real
Like u can accomplish anything that you wish
Make sure to a good protein dish
Its amazing how much we can do to our psyche
By hitting the treadmill or riding that bike
Move move move and move again
Take care of that which was given to u by Hashem
If u suffer from any depression or mood is down
Hit the gym and gone with ur frown
I guarantee it you feel great
Move move move its never too late.
Think first, that is totally true! Great poem. When the weather is nice, I go to the park and play basketball for a little while. I find it to be very relaxing, and can be quite a workout as well if anyone shows up and asks to play a game with me.
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