Forum Replies Created
For those of you who are also curious about the results (I can’t be the only one, can I?) I thought I would share the following, which I will paste below and was on the website of the American Zionist Movement:
The U.S. Area Election Committee voted to delay calculation of the votes until disputes regarding the registration list have been resolved. We anticipate being able to release the results of the election in early June. Even then there may be disputes awaiting adjudication in Jerusalem. Everyone would like to see results and they will be released as soon as possible. Watch this website for more information.
Has anyone heard or seen results? If so, what are they or where can we see them?
Thank you, Reb Yid, but as the elections are now closed, there is no reason to try to convince anyone to vote or not to vote. However, is anyone aware of the results? If they have not yet been published, is anyone aware of when and where they will be available?
Voting ended April 30. Have the results been released? If so, I have not been able to locate them. Does anyone know where to find them? If not, when will they be released?
For those of you who started Megilla on July 13, you are about to finish your third masechta on Sunday, starting Yevamos on Monday.
For those of you who started Arachin on that same day, you are about to finish your fourth masechta on Friday, starting Tamid on Yom Kippur.
Please see my post from July – Yom Kippur is a great time to start, and the next two masechtos of Tamid and Middos are really a wonderful limud (as well as mishnayos in general, as I said above). Perhaps you can try it for only these two masechtos, which are less than 5 weeks combined. And if it works for you, keep going to the more daunting Kinim and Kailim after that!
Seder Kodshim starts tomorrow with Maseches Zevachim. Start now and finish the seder in less than 10 months at 2 mishnayos a day.
For those who have not yet started and are interested, the official mishna yomi cycle (two mishnayos a day) is starting a new seder this week. Nezikin starts with the first two mishnayos of Bava Kama this Friday.
Let me start by saying that people learning during C.H. is a big pet peeve of mine, so be prepared for a lengthy ramble.
To the people who say learning is better than spacing out, I disagree. People who space out eventually space back in. If you are engrossed in a sefer, the chances of spacing back in are much smaller.
Sorry for the rant, and thank you for reading.
I heard that the reason for this minhag is that one is not allowed to benefit from the chanuka licht. Not doing tasks during this time makes sure that one is not using the lights. If this is the case, one could argue, that this would apply to things that require light, but not to things that don’t require the use of ligh. One could also argue that, b’zman hazeh, when we have well-lit homes and there is no worry about using the lights inappropriately, then it would also not apply.
Of course, there are other reasons brought down, such as the fact that a big part of the nes happened through a woman. So, in either case, go with the family minhag and/or ask a posek.
Sorry. I figured more details would shed light on things and make it easier to provide productive and educated responses. Here it is in a nutshell:
Issue 1: Communication between the boy and girl in a long-distance shidduch where logistically, neither person is able to travel for several weeks.
Issue 2: A long-distance relationship where one person is scheduled to travel and calls off the shidduch at the last minute.
Issue 3: When messages should be passed through the shadchan and when they should go directly from boy to girl (or vice-versa).
If you would like to speak generally regarding these issues, then this post is sufficient. If you would like to speak to the specifics of the situation I described above, please read the post above to get more details.
Also, I am sorry for the appearance of the original post. When I typed it, it was with paragraphs. Somehow it came into the coffee room as one long thing.
“One should not point out or make it obvious that Harchakos are not being held of at the time, as it is a lack of Tznius”
I was told in chasan classes that the tznius issue is NOT whether your wife is now a nidda, but which night she is going to the mikva. I was told there is nothing wrong with being or not being a nida, and it is not untznius if others know. After all, if you pass your wife the keys, it is obvious she is not a nidda, and if you put the baby down on the sidewalk, it is obvious that she is a nida. Unless someone is watching and making a mental note each day to see when I start handing her the keys directly, people will not know when she went to the mikva, and this no breach of tznius. (And if people are actually doing that, then I think that THEY have a problem.) I have never heard that one needs to (or even should) keep harchokos in public at all times.
Regarding actual displays of affection with one’s spouse (e.g. hand-holding), I would love to see a source. It seems to me to be slightly distateful, but not such an outrageous display or pritzus that it needs to be reprimanded, but that seems to me to be a societal issue, and would probably be different depending on one’s community.
Regarding displays of affection with one’s child (other than in shul, as mentioned above), I would think (hope) that, especially with the obvious difference in age, anyone who sees such a display by a frum person would be dan l’chaf z’chus that it is the child, and not suspect one of inappropriate conduct, but again, this could differ by community.
Finally, the OP requested sources, and none have been given, so it seems to me that all posts (inculding mine!) are personal conjecture based on each person’s feelings and/or community standards and not halachic. Still waiting to see sources!
The idea that my spouse is better than I am and I don’t deserve him/her can, in fact, be a good attitude in a marriage. After all, if he/she is so much better than I am and I don’t deserve him/her, then that can be a great motivation towards tikkun hamiddos and other self-improvement so that you CAN grow into someone who deserves him/her. On the other side, if you feel that YOU are better, and that you spouse needs to improve, that is a recipe for problems in the marriage.
Don’t get me wrong; self-esteem is very important, and one shouldn’t take the thought above to the extreme. However, please don’t say that feeling such as yours are bad. Channeled in the right way, they can be the pathway to a great marriage.
I once heard that the fact that minhag olam is to call the day lag BAomer is a proof that the correct way to count each night is LAomer. After all, we know that if one says the number of the day before counting, he can no longer count with a bracha. So can one say, before counting, tonight is LagBaOmer? Only if the PROPER way to count is LAomer. Then, by saying LagBaOmer, he will not have properly counted and can then still count with a bracha. Therefore, since the proper way to count is LAomer, the minhag arose to call the day Lag BAomer so as to avoid such a problem. (Yes, this probably belongs on the Purim Torah thread….)
My personal minhag each night is to count twice (I say the bracha only once.). I say HaYom Yom Echad LaOmer. HaYom Yom Echad BaOmer. I know that, in truth, one is yotzei either way, but for two extra seconds each night, why not be yotzai both shitos?
There is a big difference between pidyon haben and yerusha. Pidyon haben is peter rechem – 1st born of the mother. Pi shnayim for yerusha is reishis ono – 1st born of the father. A man with multiple wives could end up being podeh a son multiple times, but only one will get pi shnayim in the yerusha. Therefore, I don’t think we can compare the halachos of pidyon haben with yerusha. As for taanis bechorim, I’m not familiar with the halachos, but lav davka that the rules are comparable with pidyon haben and/or yerusha.
No Modern Orthodox Rabbi ever advocated those things either. Are there people who do it? Unfortunately, yes. That doesn’t mean it’s the “official party line” of Modern Orthodoxy. Chances are, if Modern Orthodoxy didn’t exist, those people wouldn’t be keeping kosher or Shabbos at all either.
Can I add that according to the Conservative “party line”, you should be shomer shabbos and kashrus, however most who identify as “conservative” are not.
Regarding inviting non-Jews on yom tov:
it was explained to me by a rav that cooking for them is assur m’d’orisa. Inviting them is assur m’d’rabanan. Why? because even if you are only serving sandwiches, what are you going to do if they ask for a cup of tea? And regarding non-Jews who are in the process of converting, it is still not allowed without certain items being done differently (I don’t recall the exact details).
Regarding non-Jewish or intermarried relatives, the most important thing is to always remain civil and pleasant to EVERYONE. Also, while it may be appropraite at some times to no longer have contact with certain people, ba’alei teshuva may have kibud av considerations(like if the sibling is intermarried and it is a big deal to the non-frum parents that they be invited for Thanksgiving, or something like that). Everyone should use common sense, ask shailos, and be civil and pleasant to all.
Hoshana Raba, being the seventh day of succos, is still succos, so the esrog should still be huktzeh l’mitzva, and thus asur for hana’a. I’ve heard of biting it off (though never with any source) as a segula for having a boy, but after yom tov, not on hoshana raba. Any thoughts on this?