happy girl

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  • December 24, 2009 3:29 am at 3:29 am in reply to: STOP BLAMING THE BOYS!!!!!! #674936
    happy girl
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    another incentive to join SYAS youdontknwme: I heard that if you are a boy SYAS actually “begs” you to come to their singles events over shabbos and they often make the girls pay and the boys get to come for free! However, its NOT fair to girls. guess you guys are more valuble than girls

    December 18, 2009 5:28 am at 5:28 am in reply to: Shidduch World #1013850
    happy girl
    Member

    shidduch solution:

    I was looking at the shidduch world website and I was just wondering why it does not ask if the boy went to college. It only asks for a job description. If someone writes, for example, sales it could mean that the boy has a college degree in buisness or finance… yet, it could also mean that the person never went to college at all. College is important to many girls so I think it would be an important peice of imformaion to write on the profile. What do you think?

    December 18, 2009 5:09 am at 5:09 am in reply to: Facebook and Twitter #690688
    happy girl
    Member

    facebook “in theory” can be a great tool to network when used properly by mature adults who know what kind of information should and should not be shared with others.

    HOWEVER….(and this is a HUGE however!!!!)when people spend hours on end on the site and update their walls constantly it becomes bitul zeman…and this is facebook’s major problem. Even if facebook was the most secure site in the world there is no reason in the world why people should get addicted to it and feel the need to log on any time they are near a computer. Also, I don’t think it’s a good idea to post pictures…

    December 16, 2009 1:33 am at 1:33 am in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #670032
    happy girl
    Member

    ok, your right. sorry. no loshon lorah intended and I never said those bad things happens to ALL the people on the UWS or ALL older singles in general. There must be some serious people on the UWS but the truth is that it’s NOT the overwelming majority. It’s just the way it is. Someone who lives on the UWS told me that statement….and he lives there claiming he is the ONE exception to that statement.

    As far as getting more modern as you get older: Again, it does not and should not happen to everyone but it does happens to enough people to be an eye opener and become something to ponder about. As far as moving out of your parents house when you get older….sometimes the circumstances call for it but due to the freadom and independence people become more “carefree.” Some…NOT all. but it happens to enough people to ponder about…

    December 15, 2009 5:33 pm at 5:33 pm in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #670027
    happy girl
    Member

    three words: UPPER WEST SIDE

    yes, thats what happens to the good girls and good boys who get older…unfortuately

    December 15, 2009 12:08 am at 12:08 am in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #670017
    happy girl
    Member

    Yes, the good guys get married right away. Someone once told me that their are more good girls out there than there are good boys (a ratio of 10:1). Therefore, there are not enough good guys to match the good girls. So yes, there are the same “number” of girls and boys out there. So what happens to the guys once they get older and are not married? well, they become less frum, drink alcohol, do drugs, become lax in halacha with girls, become lax in kosher…they move out of their parents home and blend into the western world. And there you go, one more jewish male neshama lost and one more jewish female neshama who will not get married because her bashert decided to go off the derech….

    December 14, 2009 10:29 pm at 10:29 pm in reply to: Shidduch World #1013833
    happy girl
    Member

    so it’s a NO to online dating. It’s a NO to shadchanim in general. what do you suggest? will you only go out if someone you know knows the girl? what do you think about meeting on your own….the way our parents generation did it (and they turned out fine!!!)

    December 14, 2009 10:25 pm at 10:25 pm in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #670015
    happy girl
    Member

    so, in general, do you think that the same guys who would not go to a shadchan would not go online either?

    December 13, 2009 10:44 pm at 10:44 pm in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #670007
    happy girl
    Member

    ok, this shidduch world debate should really be on the topic (already created on YW) called “shidduch world” This thread was not created in support of or against shidduch world….Lets not go off topic, it was created with one question:

    Why do guys only go to shaddchanim in their 30’s and 40’s and not their 20’s? Girls in their 20’s go to shaddchanim the shadchanim only have a one or two guys to give them. These shadchanim recycle those one or two poor guys to all the girls on their list whether or not it seems like a good match (no wonder the guys can’t stand shadchanim!)If more guys would go to shaddchanim this problem would be solved. I know shidduch world and other internet dating sites might be one solution but I have a feeling that the same guys who don’t go to shaddchanim will not go online either.

    December 11, 2009 1:22 am at 1:22 am in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #669999
    happy girl
    Member

    what is shidduch world adding that SYAS does not already have to offer? will this just cause singles to split into 2 sites? I’m not saying that shidduch world is not a great site with a great idea but since we already have a site like SYAS with so many people on it why not brainstorm together and incorporate the great ideas from each site to one great site. this way all singles will be on one site and the database will we huge. work with what we already have and maybe we can make a great site even better!!!

    December 10, 2009 9:47 pm at 9:47 pm in reply to: Where are all the Boys? #669994
    happy girl
    Member

    I agree…technically, it does makes more sense to be set up by someone you know but that leaves out a lot of girls who just don’t happen to know the “right” people and get left behind. That also limits both parties in way. The other option is a singles event but how many guys out there take them seriously? I dated a few guys who said they use singles events as “comedy clubs” to see all the “poor” girls out there and then they talk about it with their friends and have a good laugh. (btw, those guys did not get a second date from me!!)I know there are great guys out there but why are they so hard to find?????

    December 10, 2009 3:13 am at 3:13 am in reply to: Shidduch World #1013819
    happy girl
    Member

    the website is a great concept but I checked it out and there really are not a lot of young guys on the site. How long ago was this site created?

    November 30, 2009 10:21 pm at 10:21 pm in reply to: Broken Engagements #954255
    happy girl
    Member

    Thanks jewishandworking22!!!

    I agree with you all the way.

    why do things have to be so complicated when it can be so simple.

    hope you find your bashert soon!!!

    November 29, 2009 4:41 pm at 4:41 pm in reply to: Broken Engagements #954249
    happy girl
    Member

    I heard that the shtar mechila is only needed if you have a teniyim. I don’t understand…honestly, if it wasn’t heard of until 2 years ago then how important can it be?

    If someone gives the shtar just for shidduch reasons because “no one will go out with her unless she has one” but does not really forgive the other side ….whats the point. They were just engaged. why can’t they just move on. You can’t control a person’s feelings. you can’t force someone to really forgive. Just because you have the signed paper doesn’t mean there is no grudge.

    also, who has to sign the paper. is it just the girl and the boy or do the parents also have to sign? what if the parents lost a lot of money with the whole engagement and they refuse to sign? are the parents just expected to forgive and forget the lost money? If a parent is rich that might be easy to do but what if the parent is tight on money and now lost money and will have to spend it again for a future shidduch. It might not be so easy to forgive in such a situation.

    November 29, 2009 1:58 am at 1:58 am in reply to: Broken Engagements #954246
    happy girl
    Member

    I heard about this shtar mechila document recently. what is it? is it always needed for a broken engagement? Is it true that no one will go out with someone who doesn’t have one? which side is the one to give it? and what if one side does not forgive the other side? Is is good to sign it just to have the paper and show it off to a future shidduch?

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