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  • in reply to: Moshiach is coming this year! #1847618
    philosopher
    Participant

    Amen, I hope moshiach should arrive speedily.

    Throughout history many Jews often calculated with gematrias and cheshbonos and in the end moshiach didn’t come. We believe every day that he can come without all these cheshbonos. If he comes, I’ll be overjoyed. And if he doesn’t come now, I wasn’t relying on cheshbonos anyway.

    in reply to: How muck Brisket/roast Per person #1846663
    philosopher
    Participant

    1/2 lb per person always works for me. I’ve never had to little, usually it’s just enough with 3-4 few slices left over.

    in reply to: Help! Husband OTD #1844889
    philosopher
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    emiller4025, if you don’t mind my asking, what compels you to live within the community and stay with your family? Do you care deeply for them that makes you stay or is it out of familiarity? I have a relative that went OTD, he lives at home but comes and goes as pleases. He doesn’t have a normal marriage with his wife, but they do it to keep the family intact, and from his side, why not? He can still do as pleases. So I wonder if such a dynamic is in all families where the father has gone OTD.

    Don’t take my question personally, I’m just trying to figure out why someone who doesn’t believe in Judaism stays in a frum environment.

    in reply to: Help! Husband OTD #1844521
    philosopher
    Participant

    You should reach out to get the help your husband needs, whether it’s a Rav or GYE. If your husband wants to change he will when he gets help. If he doesn’t want to change there’s nothing you can do. You then have two options, if he still wants to stay, you can keep the family intact which it can be exceptionally hard living with such a husband, but it’s a better environment for the kids where you can control the environment way more than if you take the second option which is divorce.

    Remember, ultimately there’s nothing you could do to prevent him from living the life he wants, it’s his bechira.

    I feel your pain and hopelessness. Stay strong and may you have a complete yeshiah.

    in reply to: China’s “Manufactured” virus succeeded Big-Time #1844411
    philosopher
    Participant

    Regardless if the virus is natural or lab-created, the fact is that China ignored early warnings by doctors and scientists and even persecuted these individuals. They hushed up the situation and that’s how it grew out of control. Either way, the Chinese government are viscous people who don’t care much about human lives. And the world and the media is quiet about them, hushing up every article that points a finger on those guilty of not stopping the spread of coronavirus before it spiralled out of control..

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1844331
    philosopher
    Participant

    rational, Exactly. I said I BELIEVE that it helped me fight the virus. Please look up the word “believe” in a dictionary. Beliefs are not necessarily based on proven facts. Good for you that you hold no beliefs because beliefs are not based on actual proven facts which you obviously need in every aspect of your living your life. Good for you that you only know things as facts that are scientifically proven. It’s mamesh an inspiration to me that everything that you do in life is based on lab findings.

    For others who would are having fever, cough, weakness, sore throat, etc. and the doctor won’t give them medication as they generally don’t do for viruses, and they want to try harmless remedies, it’s their choice, not yours to make. You don’t rule the world, btw. No one is forcing you to try it, people can decide for themselves if they want to try it and if it helped them. Only Hashem knows everything and you don’t, which means you have no clue if the garlic helped me get over the virus. Again, I never claimed as a fact that it does, I said I BELIEVE that it helped me. All the nosh, cakes and cookies in the grocery stores are way more dangerous than garlic and vitamins, so ill people can try it out for themselves.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1844151
    philosopher
    Participant

    jdb, you wrote “I spoke with a relative in BP who has coronavirus, tested and confirmed. They told us that their doctor can’t get the medication they are supposed to get, because there are shortages. But they now knows that garlic and tea are sufficient, and all these guidelines aren’t necessary” What in the world does that mean?! I don’t understand what you wrote. As far as I could understand your relative in BP cannot get medication because there’s a shortage so they are trying to treat it garlic and tea…it’s sufficient for most people. Obviously, if they could get medication they would. The US government repeatedly said that they will not treat those with mild symptoms. Those with critical symptoms such as shortness of breath will get treatment, otherwise they will not be treated. If all people who get the virus will go to the doctor or emergency room then out medical care centers will collapse. It is already stretched to the limit. Some doctors do give medicine, like that doctor from Monroe, I forgot his name…but most doctors give nothing for coronavirus if the symptoms are not severe.

    Regarding my suspicion that my symptoms were coronavirus, 80% of people who get coronavirus in the US are not tested due to shortages of tests. These tests are withheld for the majority of people and mostly given to critical patients. Regardless if one is tested or not, he mA large percentage of people who are sick from viruses likely have coronavirus. Now before you scream at me for “my disinformation”, I was at the doctor with my daughter last week who was also not feeling well. She had different symptoms than me and I just wanted to make sure that she doesn’t have strep. So I took her to get a culture taken and it was negative. The doctor asked if there was anyone sick at home, i said I was sick and now felt ok, and previously other family members were t feeling well, and the DOCTOR (for those who are sold on doctors knowing everything) said that it’s most likely the coronavirus that my daughter has and that my family had. And she did not test my daughter nor give her medication…

    P.S. for those likely to go into epiliptic shock that we went to the doctor even though we likely had coronavirus, we followed all procedures we were told to follow, including wearing masks, so don’t worry.

    Please stop being ridiculous. It’s important to go to the doctor if symptoms become severe, regardless of whether vitamins, garlic or other home remedy was used. Everyone knows that and sharing home care remedies doesn’t change that.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843965
    philosopher
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    bais Hillel, thanks. I know you directed your words to other posters, buy I appreciate it.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843635
    philosopher
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    GAGA, thank you. Indeed as you write “You can disagree all you want, just put a bit of machshava in to the things you are writing”. Exactly. There’s no need for people to be disrespectful, dramatic or make fun of someone’s opinion when that person is simply talking about their experience with a home remedy. All they could’ve say that for them they’d rather not eat garlic based on someone’s one time experience, or that they would feel more comfortable taking garlic after talking to their doctor about it, or something neutral like that. No need dramatically declare that “it’s dangerous” or make fun fof someone sharing their opnion/experience about using garlic as a cough medicine or an immune booster…

    Like you, I also experienced the coughing relief right away after eating the garlic and therefore I’m convinced that garlic helped with my cough as well as boost my immune system to help fight the virus. As you say, I never claimed that garlic cures coronavirus.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843512
    philosopher
    Participant

    Reb Eliezer, true. We can, and should, consult with doctors, but Hashem is the ultimate Rofeh.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843520
    philosopher
    Participant

    rational, I have no problem when people voice their opinion that they are skeptical that garlic “cured” the cough as I originally said. It bothers me that people call sharing my experience “dangerous” or crack a joke that we should tell Trump about it…

    Now I feel that not only did it heal my coughing, it also boosted my immune system to fight the virus so that my symptoms did not get worse not prolonged. Of course, the bottom line is that everything is bashert, garlic or no garlic, but b’derech hatevah, I feel the garlic relieved my symptoms, specifically the cough.

    Why do you think I did other things the day I took the garlic? I didn’t do anything else. I didn’t test if I have the coronavirus as I was hoping that it will blow over quickly and there’s no medication that can cure it regardless. Although there are people, including many doctors, who have seen patients respond positively to hydroxychloroquine. In any case, for relatively mild symptoms, I believe they don’t even administer the test as they preserve it for those with severe or even critical symptoms.

    Now I’m not trying to scientifically prove anything. If I would want to scientifically prove my theories regarding the medicinal properties of garlic and that it heals coronavirus then I’d go work in the medical industry or a pharmaceutical company.

    All I’m saying is that I believe that the garlic helped me and it may help others who are having symptoms of the coronavirus, or any virus or disease for that matter. I felt immediate relief of my coughing after ingesting the garlic and it’s a fact that garlic has immune boosting properties which I feel helped my body fight off the virus.

    Regardless, garlic eating was my hishtadlus, and with Hashem’s help it seems to have helped. This is my opinion, it is not a scientifically proven fact and I have never claimed it to be. People can try it for themselves and see if it works for them.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843386
    philosopher
    Participant

    Thank you Mammele and ChalabiJew (as well as Uncle Ben whom I thanked in my earlier post) for your perceptive and rational comments. I mamesh felt attacked and bullied by the others simply for sharing my experience with garlic so that others can try this remedy for themselves.

    ChaalabiJew, I am b’chasdei Hashem feeling much better than yesterday. B”H. It was more scary than simply not feeling well, having the classic symptoms of coronavirus with fever (mine was constantly only low-grade), dry cough and weakness, I was afraid the symptoms shouldn’t get worse seeing where many others ended up…

    All choile Yisroel should have a complete refuah sheleimah!

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843299
    philosopher
    Participant

    Thanks to you all for being so friendly. I checked out a while ago from here and now I see what I missed from not posting here… I was just trying to share MY experience with, and MY opinion about, GARLIC. Seems that everywhere you can share info and experiences but not here…

    Thanks all for wishing me a refuah sheleimah. That’s so thoughtful. I’m so overwhelmed from the caring and positive vibes I get here, I’ll definitely post again here (not).

    And now not sarcastically, thanks Uncle Ben for being the exception here with your rational comment.

    P.S. Btw, doctors don’t know everything. A while ago I had a condition which I self-diagnosed and the doctor I went to told me I was “fine”. I was uncomfortable with his “diagnose” as I knew there was something wrong. Sure enough, I went to a different doctor who sent me to a specialist…long story short, I was correct with my diagnose and needed and had surgery. I’m not saying you can make dangerous medical decisions on your own, but if people can’t take a natural, healthy food without an ok from their doctor then IMO it’s absolutely ridiculous. Do you also call the doctor before ingesting candy made of dangerous chemicals or cake and cookies full of saturated fat? Or even when wanting to eat healthy foods like fruit, do you call the doctor then as well? I don’t understand this obsession of asking doctors everything, if you people indeed do so… Instead it is belief that you don’t do that, but you are just being ridiculously judgemental by telling readers that THEY can’t take GARLIC without the approval of their doctor… You can try a bit of garlic, it was used as medication for sick people for milleniums, and see if it helps you regardless of the naysayers on here. Of course, if you take medication and ingesting garlic may cause problems, or if you have underlying conditions and even a bit of garlic may be harmful to you, then OBVIOUSLY, as with any food that causes you to have a negative reaction, don’t eat it or discuss it with your doctor. OBVIOUSLY.

    Really, it never occurred to me that I can’t share my experience with GARLIC without being attacked and made fun of…

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843170
    philosopher
    Participant

    Really, you can’t publish your experience with a healthy food? Sorry, the internet is full of articles about healthy food. No one is forced to eat garlic.

    I honestly don’t understand how people can turn a post where someone is trying to be helpful into a negative thing. Don’t want to try garlic, so don’t, no one is forcing you. But people are allowed, and should be encouraged, to share what works for them. That there are crazy people withholding required medical treatment is no one’s problem other than people who do so. Information should be shared.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843118
    philosopher
    Participant

    Health, well the medical profession does not know EVERYTHING. There are continuous studies done for a reason.

    All I can say is that I was coughing a lot yesterday and was afraid that will get stronger. So I took the garlic yesterday and stopped coughing. I was coughing a bit today in the morning and took only a quarter of a garlic clove as it was very fresh and almost burning my throat…and my coughing is extremely minimal, b”H.

    I’m not saying that the garlic is totally fighting the virus. I’m now feeling weaker than yesterday, having chills and still feeling some pressure in my chest. But IMO the coughing would have been way worse had I not taken the garlic.

    People can try it for themselves and see if it works.

    in reply to: Garlic for Coronavirus #1843121
    philosopher
    Participant

    Health, I forgot to ad that you should do research because garlic is known remedy to help for coughs. Plus garlic helps boost the immune system so I’m sure it can help fight the virus to some extent.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1813548
    philosopher
    Participant

    Klugeryid, indeed, asking for an investigation of an corrupt government employee is not an impeachable offense. The drug addict, Hunter Biden, needed to be investigated in any case. Trump could likely have wanted to kill two birds with one stone and that’s irrelevant as long as there was cause for Biden to have been investigated.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810783
    philosopher
    Participant

    Hunter Biden is a drug addict who did nothing to warrant his eceiving his $60,000 a month salary. Obama also wanted him removed from his post. It was not an offense for Trump to have asked for him to be investigated. Certainly, it is not an impeachable offense, except for in the corrupt US Congress that is currently led by Democrats whose only purpose in life since Trump was in office was to get him removed. That is total corruption by the Dems, not by Trump.

    The bottom line is that this impeachment will not pass in the Senate and Trump will in the meantime get enough support because even people who were Democrats are seeing their elected leaders doing nothing but be busy with witch hunts for 4 years…

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810636
    philosopher
    Participant

    Ahem…excuse me. I have mistakenly written one article of impeachment as contempt of Congress…it’s really called obstruction of Congress. What a kangaroo court. As much as I mostly agree with Trump policies, I’m not even such a big fan of Trump as much as I hate the abuse of power by the Democrats.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810590
    philosopher
    Participant

    I don’t even know why we are arguing about the quid pro quo and bribery accusations when the Dems dropped it like a hot potato because they realized that this very broad definition that they had to manufacture in order to ensnare Donald Trump in it could ensnare Joe Biden as well.

    Now they are accusing him of abuse of power and contempt of Congress…

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810584
    philosopher
    Participant

    Reb Eliezer, absolutely wrong. Under oath they both testified that their was no quid pro quo. You did not listen to the hearings, I presume.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810586
    philosopher
    Participant

    Reb Eliezer, sorry! You are right and I’m wrong. They actually did testify that it was quid pro quo. But they have ZERO proof that is was. That’s why I got mixed up. They say what THINK but could NOT prove that the president actually wanted a quid pro quo.

    To me if you have no proof and it’s all based on assumption it’s worth zero. And that what I had in my mind when they were asked to provide proof that it was quid pro quo they had none to offer.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810585
    philosopher
    Participant

    DassYochid, very well said.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810542
    philosopher
    Participant

    ubiquitin, kindly let us know who testified that it was a quid pro quo.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810420
    philosopher
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    Ubiquitin, ALL who testified said there’s NO quid pro quo. This impeachment process is as ridiculous as spending years on the “Russian investigation” which wasted millions of taxpayers dollars on nothing.

    I think the Democrats want Trump to win the next election because many people are voting for him only because they see the stupidity and obvious Democrats political manuavers and shenanigans which people absolutely hate.

    in reply to: Imp”eeeeeeeee”achment #1810372
    philosopher
    Participant

    Reb Eliezer sums up the entire Democrat’s argument. He says just because other presidents were not impeached for similar offenses, Donald Trump should still be impeached…

    So I would like to ask Reb Eliezer if he would like to be held to a standard that no other citizen is held to, if he’s ok with being harshly punished when no citizen is for slight offenses that every human may make in the course of a lifetime of being citizen of a country with this many laws, ONLY because he would have political enemies?! Does that make sense?

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1809742
    philosopher
    Participant

    frumtd, if a higher divorce rate indicates less dysfunction then the secular society is very, very, very functional…

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1809736
    philosopher
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    Creamnosugar, since when does being a voice of morality and outspoken against immorality have anything to do with inviting people into one’s home? It may have a connection to you but not to us Chassidim…

    As for people getting a chance to observe us, we are in the limelight everyday, no need to invite others into our home. Because of your personal journey you may have a different opinion than what Chassidishe people in general have. Different communities have different standards and different lifestyles and that’s ok. But back to the OP’s question, regardless if one is Litvish, Yekkish or Chassidish, if a host is uncomfortable with his guests it’s not a mitzvah to invite them back.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1809393
    philosopher
    Participant

    Creamnosugar, I grew up in a single parent home without being invited to others seudahs, my mother making Kiddush and havdalah, and we grew up fine, thank you very much. Sorry, but I don’t think it’s right to invite young divorced men or women, to Shabbos seudahs on a steady basis. Seudahs are not a place for informal mixing. Elderly people is a different issue, and you may critisize us for not inviting them, but I can think of many more things I can critisize the non-Chassisidishe communities buy of course I won’t, we should see th good in each other, every community has strengths and weaknesses. But I will say that inviting people who are not on our spiritual level to our family tables is a recipe for disaster, especially in these times. And I’ve personally seen disastrous results in many families of one kid after the next going OTD, or are halfway OTD because parents wanted to be inclusive and nice to everyone or make BTs.

    And you won’t say how we are or we are not a light unto the nations, Hashem is the judge of that.

    As for only voting for politicians whom I would invite to my house, that would mean I would vote for no one. That’s worse than not voting for those who will fight liberals and for conservative values which are closer to our values, so I think that suggestion is not the smartest.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1809241
    philosopher
    Participant

    Millhouse, well, thank you. I was questioning how us Chassidim would seemingly be lax in the mitzvah of hachasos orchim. But when you categorize invitations to lonely people as chesed, then Chassidim do a lot of chesed but prefer what מה טובי אהולך יעקב really means , keeping their homes more private and opening it selectively and with care. Of course, I’m not saying inviting lonely people is not a great mitzvah and perhaps there could be rectification in that area, but it’s a mentality of the home being kind of private so I don’t think that will change…. One cannot say though that Chassidim don’t do a lot of chesed and also do the mitzvah of hachnoses orchim beautifully as well, hosting travelers, having hachnasos orchim rooms in their houses always available for guests, etc. We just don’t have “open house” policies of inviting divorced women or non-religious people and others who non-Chassidim invite on a steady basis.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1809194
    philosopher
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    Billywee, I’ve reread my post many times and don’t see any reference to Donald Trump… Just kidding, I didn’t reread my post because I know I wasn’t particularly thinking of Donald Trump and therefore didn’t mention him- I was thinking more of local politicians.

    But if we are talking about Donald Trump, I think he’s a better option than the Demorats that promote an agenda of pro abortion, pro LGTB, pro everything that’s immoral. Trump however, not that he’s particularly pro-morality, (although he did sign into law that the army won’t provide medical care for “trans” crazies) but he’s not stupid and knows that his conservative supporters will drop him like a hot potato if he starts supporting liberal “values”. In fact, he got backlash from his supporters for holding up an LGTB sign. He needs to appeal to conservatives who are his strongest supporters and he knows it.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1809043
    philosopher
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    Reb Eliezer, I totally agree with you.

    in reply to: I’m engaged! ✨🥂💕 #1809001
    philosopher
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    Mazel tov! All the best to you and your chosson!

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808998
    philosopher
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    Reb Eliezer, I hear your point…but seeing the “fruits” of many open house policies, I’d say one should guard their house as much as possible…

    I never said not to invite guests, so we agree that one should invite guests that respect their standards otherwise they need not get reinvited.

    We dont have to invite others into our houses to teach them right from wrong otherwise we should invite the dregs of society to teach them the straight ways… I don’t agree that inviting them into our house is the only way to put our message out there…I strongly believe religious Jews are a light onto the nations when we vote for politicians who promote family values, we protest against the liberals who are eroding morality, we should be more outspoken and be a voice against immorality like Ben Shapiro… I don’t agree with him on all issues, I’m just saying we should take a stand and let the world know where we stand.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808892
    philosopher
    Participant

    Reb Eliezer, hachnosos orchim is a great mitzvah, I’m certainly not debating that. But there are prerquisites to this mitzvah. The first thing a person should look at when they do a mitzvah is if it will elevate them or lower them spiritually. Many have tried to “save” others while dragging down their family’s and their own ruchnius.

    Now I’m not saying you can’t invite anyone because it lowers the spiritual level of the home since the guest will automatically be of the opposite gender of one of the spouses (or teenaged or adult children in the family…). Neither do I wish to make a blanket statement that one cannot speak to the opposite gender at seudahs, I’m not saying it’s wrong in all times. Everything should be within context. And I’m sorry that you are not invited into Chassidishe homes but I can see that happening. As I said previously, we weren’t invited to anyone’s home going back 25 years ago when we were a family with no father in the house. But I wouldn’t want it another way, there’s no way I’d agree to eat at other family’s seudahs just because we didn’t have a father…So I do get that Chassidishe families don’t invite you, not that I’m not agreeing that it’s right, I’m just stating that that’s the metzius…

    But as for not inviting guests, all I said was that if one’s spouse is not comfortable with the guests they shouldn’t be invited. I did not say one shouldn’t invite guests at all, or that one cannot talk at all to guests of the opposite gender…

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808880
    philosopher
    Participant

    Joseph, overall Chassidim have not become more machmir, but some like Satmer and Sqvere have definitely become more machmir. The eltere Satmere was definitely less reserved than the general younger generation of Satmere. But the outside influence was less overall too and that’s why it didn’t effect marriages in a negative way. It was a different world back then…

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808877
    philosopher
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    Billywee, indeed many Chassidim today are more machmir on gender separation than years ago and many non-Chassidim have relaxed their standards…Divorce rates have gone up in all circles and I don’t think all of it is bad- women and men will not stay in abusive relationships anymore. However, overall, the divorce rate is higher in circles where men and women have relaxed standards, that’s a fact. Of course, there are other factors involved, the relaxing of standards is according to how integrated one is in the secular world and how accepting one is of the secular culture, that goes hand in hand. Obviously, the more frum one is, whether they are Chassidish or not, the more formal one will be with the opposite gender. It doesn’t make a marriages automatically wonderful if one is more reserved towards the opposite gender, but certainly marriages dissolve more easily the more secular “values” are embraced.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808831
    philosopher
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    Billywee, ok so if it makes you feel better let’s say the entire lifestyle of the MO potentially contributes to greater divorce rates…

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808814
    philosopher
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    Reb Eliezer, you may be an exception, there are always exceptions to the rules…but generally, the FACT is, that the more informality there is between genders, the more divorces and inappropriate behavior there will be.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808809
    philosopher
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    Gadolhadorah, the meaning of what it means to be “reserved” varies widely in NON-Chassidishe circles. What some may call “reserve” is nothing short of “unreserved” according to to other non-Chassidishe standards. It doesn’t matter how people judge the “reserved” barometer, if they are informal with the opposite gender, despite thinking they are “reserved” according to their standards, it doesn’t make them “unreserved”.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808776
    philosopher
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    “Reb” Eliezer, the Chassidishe communities don’t have to fix problems that don’t exist, even if it does in your mind…Your comment about luxuries is based on ignorance of our Chassidishe communities. There are definitely problems in certain Chassidishe communities regarding women and men having strong desire for luxuries and live on a higher standard than they can afford. In recent years some Rebbes have addressed the issue of lowering the standards for weddings and many have listened, but the everyday lifestyle standards were never addressed. Many Chassidishe people like nice cars, designer clothing and accessories and other things they can’t afford. I’m not saying it doesn’t create sholom bayis problems but because the divorce rate is generally low in the Chassidishe communities doesn’t mean these problems don’t exist within some Chassidishe communities.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808725
    philosopher
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    Reb Eliezer, the yetzer hora never rests and never lets people become immune… Look at the secular world, the genders intermingle casually and the rate of divorce is at 50%, and for those who are married there are many options within marriage… And just look at how these teens live coming from these freely mixing environments…They have immunity, right?

    A big part of why the divorce rate is lower in the Chassidishe community is because the majority of people in our communities don’t mix as much as in the non-Chassidishe communities. And in fact, married couples who are on the edge of Chassidish, having grown up in Chassidishe families and became more modern, often eat Shabbos and Yom Tov at each other’s houses and eat out in restaurants together, and their divorce rate is much higher than regular Chassidishe couples.

    in reply to: Merchant Making Substantial Sale to Woman #1808708
    philosopher
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    Joseph, 90% or more of your posts are about womens’ obligations (or percieved obligations) to their husbands.

    That is an obsession right there…Maybe you should think in the opposite direction and put forth some thought provoking questions of what husbands’ obligations are to their wives. It is healthy to be thinking not only of womans’ obligations to their husbands and but your brain should at least sometimes be thinking about husbands’ obligations to their wives if this is the generally the topic of your thought process.

    Any rov will say that if the husband purchases for example, large properties for personal use, if the his family will live there, then the wife must be consulted. And of course, vice versa if the women makes such purchases. But if it is for business purposes where they have separate businesses, then this question is ridiculous because every normal husband wants his wife to be successful and automatically endorses substantial business transactions if she has a successful track record, and if the husband hampers a wife in any way, he’s obviously not fit for marriage. ( And good luck in court to the husband who tries to abolish large transactions made by his wife…)

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808688
    philosopher
    Participant

    Joseph, my point is exactly that. Hosts and their spouses, whichever genders they may each be, should feel comfortable vwith their guests of the opposite gender.

    As a seminary student I ate with my fellow students in many types of homes, many Litvish and even modern homes, and we mostly spoke only to the female members of the household. It’s only in the US and in certain frum communities where theres the breakdown of formality between the genders and “everyone is friends”. I’m not saying you can’t talk to your guests if that what’s done in your community, but there still must be reserve when interacting with the opposite gender and many people have lost that reserve.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808598
    philosopher
    Participant

    Gadolhadorah, you are the one that read that theme when no one was implying that. Everyone who suported the OP simply said that a person needs to feel comfortable in the company of their guests, in a spiritual sense or otherwise, and it doesn’t matter if the guests are divorced or not.

    Personally, I don’t get this inviting divorced women thing. In our Chassidishe community the women who are divorced eat at their own family’s Shabbos seudahs. Sometimes for Yom Tov divorced women do get invited out, but these women are already close friends to their hosts and their spouses are comfortable having them at their table. We used to have a divorced man over for some seudahs but he was my husband’s close friend and he almost never spoke to me or to my teenage daughters except saying “good Shabbos” in our general direction, saying “thank you” to me and inviting us all to his wedding. If the all guests behave like this, I’d say kol hakvod to hosting guests of the opposite gender…

    My mother was divorced at a time when almost no one was in our community was and we ate by ourselves or at our grandparents’. It never occurred to us, and especially to my mother, to eat at other people seudahs and we would never have gone had we been invited out.

    in reply to: Inviting divorced women to your Shabbos table? #1808414
    philosopher
    Participant

    RebbeDebbie, if you are uncomfortable with the type of guests ( divorced or not) you shouldn’t feel any guilt about not inviting them. The atmosphere needs to be on your spiritual level and it’s not a mitzvah to be dragged down spiritually.

    We must remember that while the Torah mentioned hacnasos orchim is great, whether in Tanach or in later sources, the women used to dress way more modestly, in certain times and places even their faces were covered. Certainly, the garments used to be looser and longer than the standard today. There’s also less formality between the genders in this generation.

    One must try to preserve theirs and their family’s kedusha even at the expense of this mitzvah that can easily turn into an aveirah of tarivus.

    in reply to: Monsey Stabbing – Hit Gone Bad #1804566
    philosopher
    Participant

    It is my mind-boggling that people accept this rumor without seeing any proof. It is not only mind-boggling, it rishus. And it’s against halacha. And what does it have to do with Satmer?! I’m anti anti-Zionism and I don’t accept such stories without proof on the basis of yapping tongues. Nor do I accept any other rumors floating around. Until there’s no proof that it was an “inside job” I take it as an act of anti-Semitism, regardless whether the Ramapo Police Department rejects that idea or not. I believe these rumors are floating around because the “mighty” RPD does not want to admit that it was an act of anti-Semitism and so every second person will jump to conclusions who the perpertrators were. We’ll see in a few days time, I hope. But for now, these rumors can ruin people’s lives…it’s unfair and immature to assume things.

    in reply to: I got my flu shot today, did you? #1791202
    philosopher
    Participant

    Last year my doctor urged me to get the flu shot but I didn’t want to. I don’t remember ever having flu, but that year, just for refusing to get the shot :-), I got a severe case of flu which turned into pneumonia. But I don’t regret not getting the shot. When the body overcomes disease it gets stronger.

    I have no doubt that down the road the medical community will come to the realization that too many shots are harmful just like they came to the realization that too much antibiotics weakens the body’s defense.

    in reply to: Mochel Loch… time to forgive and be forgiven! #1790484
    philosopher
    Participant

    Joseph, I want to ask mechila from you. I hope the 3 .oichel lochs include me as well. Although many of your posts bothered me, I don’t care anymore. I shouldn’t have gotten personal, I hope you forgive my harsh words to you.

    And if I have hurt anyone else, please forgive me as well.

    I say moichel loch, moichel loch, moichel loch as well.

    Ah git gebentched your to all.

    in reply to: Can the severity of a sin be learned from the severity of the punishment? #1783809
    philosopher
    Participant

    zahavasdad, that is an interesting and telling comparison.

    We can conclude from your comparison that punishment does not indicate severity of sin since murder is such a serious sin, it is one of the three aveiros that one should let themselves be killed for rather than commit, but it is not a chiav to give up one’s life when being forced to rip toilet paper on Shabbos. In fact, one would be foolish to give up one’s life if forced to rip toilet paper on Shabbos. So if punishment would be accordingly to the severity of the sin, murder would have to have a much greater punishment, or rather tearing on Shabbos should not have such a severe punishment if punishment we’re meted out according to the severity of the sin.

    Since we have a tendency to percieve some things as being small and irrelevant sins, I believe that severe punishment teaches us that these sins are not small and are not to be taken lightly. But it is still not an indicator how big or small a sin is.

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