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  • in reply to: I don't deserve her #795373
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    Give to charity. You’ll start to feel better.

    in reply to: Know your friends #1021432
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    “How about people like you start using their real names as well.”

    Snide remark. Another reason I would like to know more about you.

    I am not professionally obligated to share my personal name and whereabouts here online. That said, I also do not derive any financial advancement by posting on this site. The moderators are financed and benefit from their association with this site.

    So by halacha as I see it, you have an obligation to show your face and identify yourself more than by being Moderator ##. This is actually in my eyes a violation of the trust our Creator has for our communities. Like it or not, I am not wrong that often.

    Can You be so kind, and provide us with “maar mekomos” backing up your incredible “Psak Halacha” which states that we are required to identify ourselves.

    Waiting with baited breath….

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790180
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    The only time that I think we are Commanded to eat from an Animal in Judaism is in the service of the Temple and the sacrifices, and in that case it is mainly for the preists.

    I am not aware of any commandment that requires me to have chicken, lamb, veal or any other slaughtered meats. Just curius, perhaps you can instruct me otherwise.

    I will say this however, I am not sure how I will get through passover as I do feel an obligation to have my mothers chicken matzos ball soup. That said, perhaps I will have matzos balls in a vegitable broth or maybe I will not keep a full true vegitarian diet. It was never my goal in life prior to recently and I make this obligation now becuase I see true health benefits (less colon cancer and diverticular disease) as well as some possible personal benefits which may have some real value to me as a Jew.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790175
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    Judaism is not vegitarianism. But that said, keeping a slaughter free diet is not against our way of life. In fact, I argue that it is a higher priority in that you are not consuming any blood at all. And we are told not to eat blood in the Tanakh. I dont see how this is anti-Torah at any length.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789930
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    Mike, it is not the custom of even the religous jews in my vicinity to wear a kippah outside of the synagogue.

    in reply to: Why do I feel like I am still trying to Prove Myself to them? #789474
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    ChaBaD seems like the prince leading the pauper.

    in reply to: Do you play with toys? #789369
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    I also bought a large collection of marbles some time ago. Its in a large bag in my closet now. I think it will be fun and if my nephews come over, we can have something to enjoy.

    I have been collecting some bobble heads also. Just started and they are a nice way to add a little comedy and humor to your life.

    in reply to: Why do I feel like I am still trying to Prove Myself to them? #789472
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    Of course, ChaBaD is all good and fine, but when you go to your ChaBaD torah classes, don’t be surprised if there are ladies who are wearing skirts above the knees and all that when you are trying to learn the Torah of Moses. This strikes me as antithecial to our faith. But that said, ChaBaD in my experience so far is busy trying to be the light to the distanced from religious life, but maybe not the light to the true orthodox.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790171
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    Deleted

    Think whaat you will, but anti-Torah “ideals” will not be posted here.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789924
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    I must say that when I first put on the tzitzis, I thought I should put them in my pockets as I was afraid to “look that jewish” in public. I have clearly disavowed this idea. Tucking them to me is the same. It is just out of fear of being identified. Unless perhaps you are a doctor and must keep them from being soiled by infectuous innoculum.

    I just feel that they are clearly meant to be worn out and by wearing them under your garment, you are really hiding your observance.

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    mw13- they are all grouped on the left, but they are not the same people. Good luck, you failed politics course 303.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789919
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    adorable that was the situation when I first started wearing tzitzis. It took me a full year or more to go from owning them to really wearing them. I wear them every time I leave the house. So I think I do fine, thanks.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789913
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    I would think twice before wearing a wool tzitzis in very hot weather. Probably cotton is fine. But layers in very hot weather over 100 degrees, might be a problem. If it works for you fine. I would not suggest or force a child to wear them in that temperature and being a medical professional, I would bet other professionals might have some concern.

    To the 600 pound gorilla- I am not sure you are here to be a friend of myself or interested in the conversations we post. Good luck with your challenges in life.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789902
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    momma- that is something to discuss with your physician. If its over 100 degrees outside it makes little sense to dress in layers no matter how stong you want to show your faith to be. To me if you are going to risk heat stroke due to layered clothing, take the layers off. Clearly our Creator knows what is going on.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790159
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    I do not feel I have really given any thing up. Not anything that I didnt want to have any how. But that said, I was just in my bedroom reflecting on the once treif filled life that I once thought was clearly the future and the highest of ways of life. I have to say I was thinking of the fact that the last time I had a lobster was in 2000. I used to really like crab. It was the highest of dining pleasures. I think about the children who never have or will ever have that and I admit it makes me feel quite cultured on one hand but quite contaminated in the past on another.

    So its good to keep kosher. I just can not say that is really giving anything up. But get this folks, I have decided this past shabbas that I am going to go one step further and be a vegitarian. I admit it is not on the Jewish calling card per se, but I finally realize through some reading of other vegitarians that it is a higher way of ethics and I have also deemed it to be the only way that you can truly not eat the blood of another animal. So thats it from here out. But that said, I will continue eating fish, eggs and milk products.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789894
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    WIY- yes it is true. But that said, I am no where near you. I will not post my community here right now. I do have to say that even though there are so many Torah influcences in the New York corridor, I am still very sad that I have cousins who live there who have so very little to do with yiddishkeit and perhaps they are neglected among the majority of the observant.

    But that said, I found my way in life. I am quite happy. Sadly, I just have too few people to discuss Jewish life with and that probably is why I am here on this type of forum sharing and discussing and pursuing Jewish learning.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789891
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    mw13- that is not denigration. That is observation.

    I have seen some mesh tzitzis on eichlers. Are these comfortable?

    I see that the tzitzis are actually made out of some sort of polyester string rather then the string of a usual set of tzitzis.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789888
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    How would I know who “Agrees with me” or not. I live in a city of some 5000 yidden and only one rabbi and his sons wear tzitzis. At least they do so when I saw them in the synagogue. Noone here has much communication with anyone else to discuss tzitzis. Most have never heard of them. The real question is why are there so few real torah influnces in this city of several hundred thousand that sits on the corner bed of a very large Jewish community in a neighboring town. That is the real question.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789886
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    DHM- I have read numerous posts by you in the last few weeks and it is clearly apparant that you are an illiberal fellow who does not really understand the true nature of Torah service in our communities. There is nothing “disconcerting” about about a jew who does not wear tzitzis constantly in his own home. I personally am at the point where I NEVER leave home without them to go into the general community almost ever. That said, what is really disconcerting is your allegation ridden rhetoric that implies that you are not a really true Yidden unless you jump through every hoop known to the Jewish community. We are all clearly at different levels in our day and I personally feel it is a great accomplishment for a Jew living in a not so orthodox orientated city to be a Jew who wears Tzitzis where noone has ever seen a tzitzi before. That is an accomplishment. No Jew I have grown up with that I know wears tzitzis and I suppose that even the one who does is not truly orthodox as he tucks it into his pants so that noone can see them.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789882
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    I’m in luck. I just found 3 pairs of cotton tzitzis in my dresser drawer. I think I had thought they were not useful any more. One has its tzitzis slightly trimmed. The other 2 look good to go. Saves me a good deal of $$$. So I am in good shape. And to the yid above, I think I might even wear them around the house now.

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789881
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    Oh, I am not keeping Torah in my house now? Considering I am not from your “frum” community and was raised on crabmeat and lobster, I’d say I am doing a huge kiddush hashem. But that said, I will suppose that my hours of reading Tanakh and Torah are not good enough for you. No I dont even have a shirt on at this hour. Its hot out. You can keep Torah your way, but do not denigrate another fellow yid for not being as super jewish as you think you are yourself.

    in reply to: Norwegian Mass Killer Faces Only 21 Years Under Liberal European Laws #792176
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    Please inform me of your sophisticated language and tell me what a “vantz” is supposed to refer to.

    in reply to: Norwegian Mass Killer Faces Only 21 Years Under Liberal European Laws #792174
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    Criminals come from ALL ranks. Have we forgotten Bernie Madoff and others?

    in reply to: Tzitzits in the summer time #789878
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    Considering I am probably the only jew outside of the local rabbis family in my town to ever wear Tzitzis daily, I am sure I am doing quite well. But I just dont wear them in the house. I think I’ll get some cotton ones next month maybe. Thats exactly what you need in this weather.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790147
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    Giving up certain musical pleasures is not FRUM, its self denial. You can live an ascetic life if you want. But for me, I did it a while and it is not my life.

    in reply to: Why do I feel like I am still trying to Prove Myself to them? #789453
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    To: Derech HaMelech-

    Differences among our people are what make us a stong people. Noone wants the world to be exactly the same from person to person. In fact, your community should be glad to have someone like a BT in their community. Whereas you had Torah in your crib, this person had to actually find Torah in the world somewhere far from where she (or he in other peoples cases) were raised. This is a huge blessing. So if she has questions and wants to konw a minhag, be friendly and teach. But if your minhag makes no sense other than to your insular way of life, perhaps its not TORAH.

    in reply to: Why do I feel like I am still trying to Prove Myself to them? #789452
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    What you should realize is that in some of these ultra religious communities, there are those who hold fast to popularity and approval. That does not mean that they dont hold Torah high, but sadly they do not hold fast to Torah in the same way. If you are in a community and you hold fast to Torah, there is no “us and them”. You may have come from a different upbringing, but you are a jew at heart. So if you are getting “us and them” without reason or right conjecture, you are getting not Torah but praise for their own popularity in their own communities. And suffice to say, many people like their popularity and want to keep it that way.

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    600- How about the disabled and sick. Do they want to stay home all day and “make children”? The disabled have no opportunity and they have a day of less than their interests due to their previous capacities. But by your ideas, noone except the high wage workers should enjoy prosperity and independance. The child of your “welfare” mother today may grow up to be your doctor, attorney or president of tomorrow. Do not scorn the human right to procreate.

    in reply to: Why I won't let my kids do ????? #1186716
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    There is no such thing as a “neb” “nebbish” or “nebach” by Torah Definitions. This is ambivalent colloquialism that has sadly permeated out Jewish communities and is quite discriminatory.

    Torah defines the underserved portion of our communities as indigent, poor, wicked, foolish, disgruntled, ambivalent, unorthodox, wretched, petty, childless (and that is not a derogatory thought), pain stricken, evil, narcissistic, discheveled, unworthy, sick, ridiculed, spent, tasteless and likely many other ways. Calling someone a nebbish makes you the “nebbish” in my eyes. I will never use that disgusting and dirty way of describing a human being who has some worth.

    Sad that our communities that are so cohesive have such an ugly way of talking when we have Torah to guide us instead.

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    Raising taxes on the poor? Are you nuts? That is like burning down your own home. This is not the way that a civilized society engages. Rather, employ better teachers, build your community. Then you wont have “murderers from the low wage earners”. And if you deny people opportunity, you will have discontent.

    The ones to pay the share of our taxes are the high wage earners. Living in America has given them all the opportunity to earn the proceeds that they have. They must return this money to our population so that we dont have “murderers and discontent people” in any of our communities. But I know your idea wont resonate with any of the educated and intelligent voters.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790145
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    I gave up not anything of any trouble to me when I became more religious. True I did not eat any further treif. That was a good thing.

    But that said, what I’ve gained is so great.

    I also have started listening to music I never liked before and even watching TV cartoons once in a while. And I mean things like hard rock alternative music today. Its not anything that I dont think my Creator wants me to hear.

    I have stopped watching movies, but its not becuase I am religious its just because they are a total waste of time.

    in reply to: Why I won't let my kids do ????? #1186706
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    What is Gelilah? “Reserved for the most pathetic person in the synagogue… an older unmarried male…????” Sounds very discriminatory to me. You aren’t going to be a Torah Jew if you discriminate and make the older unwedded males or other minority feel ashamed. This is not the Torah that I know.

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    This antiliberalism is G-dless and pagan. All of you who bash liberalism when its really the pacificism and the permissivism that you hate should be ashamed of yourselves. You are using liberalism as a scapegoat. I have never seen true liberalism as a real problem. The problems are pacifism and permissivism and these are constantly rung up as liberalism today.

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    Comparing a permissive policy with a liberal policy is like comparing goats to horses.

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    Sorry to all you people who hate the idea of liberalism. A short sentence is not liberal. IT is permissive. This is permissisivsm. This is not liberalism. Get your facts right.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790143
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    Giving money is not “giving up”. When you give you form a connection in your soul with the party that you are giving to. You actually gain alot more than you think you “lose”.

    in reply to: Page 2 #1023512
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    I did not know that but I liked that if I want to see a commentary that I entered a comment on, I can view my profile and then I can see any conversation that has been posted and elapsed on the list.

    in reply to: Relationship Between Recent Events #789213
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    If you think that we don’t mourn gedolim today, I will suggest to you that you are living on another planet. We have at least 3 big Jewish news sources which are orthodox that post the names and information on all gedolim online. I would have never known of any of these people had it not been for vosizneias, ywn and matzav. I suggest you try again as there is a big movement in our peopel who are recalling the deaths and yahrzeits of our gedolim today. I don’t think we can ask for more in this age. But that said, mourn of course, but don’t spite our people every time there is a tragedy. You do not know Hashems will any more than you do when a Torah scroll falls from the ark.

    in reply to: Why burn Yummy Snacks? #789494
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    This is no different than the Jew who goes to the christians and says he believe in Mr. J-man. That is about how much antisemitism is dispelled. They want the destruction of our entire people.

    in reply to: Why burn Yummy Snacks? #789484
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    Dumbest thing they could do. They will make Osem popular and noone will care about their cause. Actually it works for us. But they are foolish freaks that will not see the light of heaven in a short time. Thats for sure.

    in reply to: Show your Jewish Power. #788075
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    I have no intent to pray for better weather. This is mother nature.

    in reply to: Do you play with toys? #789356
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    Childlike behavior is bad. Whining, stomping, swearing, clamoring, being wicked, foolish, immature and annoying all of that is worthless and should be left behind in your childhood. But that does not mean you can not have a rubiks cube.

    in reply to: What Should I Do? #790376
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    Hmm. I have no idea why you did not post that last commentary but in doing so, my previous comment about “doing no harm” makes no sense at all.

    in reply to: What Should I Do? #790375
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    Thanks moderators,

    What I am saying to this counselor is that he should regard his job as strengthing and improving the intelligence of his young camper. He can not control what she may carry with her or her proclivities which will likely be lifelong until she really finds some true repentance for her commentary, but that said, at 13 these children are going to be so marginal in their interests and their activities that we can only hope to be a good guide. To make her want to be ashamed is really not going to be productive, but ideally you might want to make her think of Hashem and make her try to think of considering what G-d wants for her rather than how she thinks she sees the world. If you can help her in this way, you have been very successful. But I dont think you are going to need to contact her parents over a photograph although I will say that her conduct is slightly overly free and that her thoughts are slightly in the flirty nature. She is a young kid and your job is to guide her and answer her with a leadership and G-dly interest rather than scorn and make her feel poor and inappropriate. If she is egregiously impolite or inapproptiate, deal with it by discussin it with an upper level counselor or advisor. There is always the “chain of command”.

    in reply to: What Should I Do? #790374
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    This means I am committed to “first do no harm”.

    in reply to: Changed Topic of Shiur – Do I Have A Right To Be Disappointed? #788300
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    If you think you have the ‘right’ to be disapointed and write an article about it, I ask you, do I have the right to be disapointed that this is a topic I have to think about and consider in my day as well.

    I am sure that you had a right to want to hear a particular shiur, but if someone wants to teach you another topic, be glad if you can.

    Personally I would go to the dinners. Food is good and so is good company.

    in reply to: Failed #788512
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    True kiruv begins a long lifelong relationship. Don’t expect to hit and run kiruv by saying “go to Aish” and be done with it. Get their email and being a lifelong relationship with someone you want to invest upon your friendship and your knowledge of Torah. This takes a long time and no religious person is created by a hit and run experience with any other yid unless its an extreme case and they were looking to be observant in the first place. Just a thought for you.

    in reply to: Failed #788511
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    Sometimes the strongest Kiruv you can do it not to share the information such as AISH with the prospective lesser observant Jew but to simply be a strong example of a person that they can put their trust into and that they can see as a person who follows Hashem. Don’t expect every non observant Jew to become observant over night and go to Aish and the like for their immediate time after they meet you. In fact, you can have the opposite effect of being annoying and create resentment if you push this on them. Wait until they are ready and are indeed asking for more information. In the mean time, let your light shine and let them know that your way is healthier, more stabile and has G-ds blessings. They might figure it out and if they dont, they will still know you as being strong and intelligent and no matter what they may say or do, they will never be able to topple this impression. That is what Kiruv REALLY is about.

    in reply to: Wearing a Yarmulka in a Movie Theater #787719
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    Well I can edit the profile. but I did not know that that information was publically available as I can not seem to figure out how to look up someones profile yet.

    in reply to: Jewish Calendars #787759
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    Just curious if there are any other suggestions.

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 190 total)