WolfishMusings

Postscript: Eeees decided that she wanted to eat in the succah the night of Shmini Atzeres, and so we did. During the day we were guests by someone who eats in the succah, so we ate there then as well.

The Wolf

NY Mom,

I don’t think that counts… otherwise, no one would ever say it’s a mitzvah to get drunk (unless they just want to get drunk anyway).

The Wolf

i think theres a halacha about keeping to your minhagim

Well, since I don’t have a minhag either way on this issue… 🙂

The Wolf

random question

In light of the conversation, I’d say that the question is anything but random. 🙂

The Wolf

minhag backwords is gihenim

I’m confused… what, exactly, is that supposed to mean?

The Wolf

bygirl13- if there is a sale going on that will not be available after yom tov, it is mutar to shop.

Then I *really* in trouble. The things I bought (peppers, mushrooms, corn and cucumbers) were not on sale and will be available after Yom Tov. 🙂

The Wolf

HIE,

Since I don’t have a sefer Shomrei HaMitzvos handy, how about telling me what it says.

Specifically, does it really say that an otherwise valid eruv is invalidated because some people may do unrelated things that are forbidden within?

The Wolf

Wolfish, that’s not pshat in the midrash. He overreacted to bittul torah.

That’s right… he had to (re)learn that working is not bittul Torah.

The Wolf

except the gemara says Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai’s derech didn’t work for most.

Not only that… HKBH had to send RSBY back to his cave for another year so that he could learn that working for a living wasn’t a sin deserving of death.

The Wolf

The Wold- you were really lucky. Not everyone gets it so easy, it’s a special bracha.

Believe me, I’m *well* aware of that.

The Wolf (Wold????)

I wasn’t spared “from all that” and I appreciate my wife much more because of how hard she was to find.

I’m sure you meant that you appreciate your wife more than you would have if you had not gone through the shidduch process — and not that you appreciate your wife more than I do mine, right? 🙂

In any event, it’s a personal thing. If that’s what causes you to appreciate your wife and enhance your shalom bayis and relationship — then all the more power to you.

The Wolf

What is the purpose of it? I think Feif Un is correct when he said that it is only to bash the MO.

Ya think? 🙂

The Wolf

and, this is in shidduchim isn’t it?

In my case, it was not. We were both too young for shidduchim — and when I hear about some of the craziness that goes on in the shidduch world, I thank HKBH for sparing me from all that.

The Wolf

Yes, mesira solves everything.

It’s already well established that “mesira” is allowed in cases of child abuse.

The question then boils down to whether or not allowing your minor child to get drunk qualifies as abuse. Cantoresq clearly believes is does.

The Wolf

I’m not a doctor (never intended to be one), but I do have some medical background.

When I was a freshman in college lo many years ago, I passed by an office on campus every day on my way to my freshman English class. That office was the office of the college Emergency Medical Squad. While I had studied First Aid back when I was in the Boy Scouts, I had never seriously considered doing anything with it. And yet, when I passed by the office, I felt something… tugging at me, so to speak. Eventually I walked in and began pulling shifts as a dispatcher.

Eventually, I ended up taking the Advanced First Aid and EMT courses at the college as well and became a riding member of the Squad. And I did with no intention of ever becoming a doctor, so I can’t say that parnasah was my primary goal*. And yes, I saved lives on the squad.

Many people who are quite knowledgeable knew of my situation — that I was studying emergency medicine solely for its own sake and not for any professional reason — and NOT ONE PERSON told me that what I was engaged in was bittul Torah or a waste of time. On the contrary, I was told that was I was doing was an honorable and admirable thing.

There are those on these boards who will tell you differently. They will say that if it isn’t for paranasah, it shouldn’t be done (and even then it’s clearly not preferred). But all I can say is that I’m glad I “wasted” my time on emergency medicine… and there are other people out there who are better off for it as well.

The Wolf

*Years later, I did end up working professionally on an ambulance on a part time basis for a while – but I can honestly say that I had no real intention of doing so when I first began to study emergency medicine. It was simply because I found myself in need of a small paycheck that I took the job.

Or do you mean fortune cookies?

The Wolf

a thread on ywn about drinking on simchas torah as if its ok….

Bygirl… just out of curiosity, why do you think drinking on Simchas Torah is wrong… provided it’s done responsibly*?

The Wolf

(* Yes, I know it’s not always like that in the real world — but your post made it sound like it’s wrong altogether.)

I will not argue with copying machines.

The Wolf

Wolfish, which college did you attend? Was it a local college, like Brooklyn or Lehman, or a dorm college? Furthermore, how many years ago (ballpark) was this? I have spoken to friends of mine who do campus kiruv, and yes my understanding is the correct one. It’s possible your experiences are outdated or non-normative.

I went to school as an undergrad at a local school about twenty years ago. I am in grad school now, also locally.

You’ll also note that I made a distinction between local colleges and out of town colleges on the first page of this train wreck of a thread.

The Wolf

Oh, please. Let’s not play “my gadol is bigger than your gadol.” Such games aren’t productive and only encourage the other side to denigrate the other’s gadol.

FWIW, I don’t use the eruv. But I will not, under any circumstances, castigate those who do. They have upon whom to rely, as do I.

The Wolf

Do the majority of people drive their kids to yeshiva?

Not in the circles I run in. Most either have school buses (for younger kids) or the kids take the bus (for older kids). I would think that the number of drivers driving down Coney Island Avenue with kids in their car AND with the capacity to take other kids (if they have one kid with no alternate way to get to school, they probably have others as well) is pretty small.

And, as an aside, are you (or Rav Reisman) expecting parents to stop at every block where the bus stops in order to see if they might know a kid who needs a lift? That’s unrealistic.

Bottom line is that I think (assuming your quote is correct) is that Rav Reisman meant it as we initally assumed it and you are changing the tune because you realize that it is dangerous.

Otherwise, I again ask, how you can reconcile his statement that there should NEVER be a bochur waiting with the idea that people shouldn’t pick up other people that they don’t know.

The Wolf

(BTW… you still never answered me on where you got the idea that non-Jews don’t do favors for others?)

The Wolf

rav Reisman, means someone youv’e seen before in eg. yeshiva..

How do you reconcile that with the statement you’ve attributed to him of:

RABBI REISMAN shelita, Rosh Hayeshiva, Yeshiva Torah Vodaath, oNce said, “there should never be bochurim waiting by a bus stop in a frum area” meaning to say that people should offer rides

I think the two are incompatible unless you posit that every frum driver must know multiple kids who wait for the bus… a scenario I find highly implausible.

So, how do you reconcile the two statements?

The Wolf

People go to college to party. This is an image portrayed in goyishe popular culture, as well as numerous news stories where college partying clashes with law. This is undeniable and not subject to debate.

I deny it and debate it. I went to college (and am still going now) and do not party.

In general, I find that whenever anyone says something is “undeniable” and “not subject to debate” it usually is.

The Wolf