Really open everything just seems so far away maybe eat out or activity

Regarding shadchanim we definitely need more people to get involved I was red a few girls by a shadchan and my friends wife is on all of them as a reference why isn’t he trying to red them himself to me(maybe theyre not good ideas not sure)More young marrieds need to try but please think before u red don’t just red “pants-skirts” shidduchum its not fair to the boy and girl wasting their time and efforts To the professinal shadchanim out there many of you look at it as a business(not sure why don’t think theres much money to be made)some of you like the hock and others are really lshem shamayim but whatever it is that motivates you please spend the time to really get to know the singles and so many more shadchanim will be made

to notasheep:its true I do not know you and may have come of a bit too critical but the way u reacted did seem like you dont realize the magnitude of the problem I personally feel the person that can judge the system are the older singles that are in it and go through the emotional roller coaster of it the good and the bad.Ask any older single and they will admit in my experience to the fustration that something is just not working here Just because many do get married does not mean the system is not broken and could be greatly improved Regarding pictures: I do feel its wise if and only if an older single can look at it with an open mind that it might not be a great picture etc and is not looking for a model It can save alot of time when looks are totally not in the ballpark

to Baruch10901:If it doesnt bother your daughter what are you worried about? Mabye the stutter is not so bad or mabye your daughter is very mature and can see the boy for his amazing qualities even though he has a speech impediment

to the bigone:I have been dating for a while and more concerned with finding out if chemistrywise its a match then worried about being infatuated and losing my head think we should trust our commen sense a bit more.Dont think guys would just go for prettiest girl in the room meeting a person makes a big difference All I know is system is broken causing unnecessary emotional stress and wasting precious years of singles lives lets find a solution!

It would solve:the pressure I feel from not being married,the distance and divide I feel with all my married friends, the heartache from not knowing if I made the right decision of saying no to that one girl,the feeling of being in flux and not really knowing where do go based on what will people think of me in the shidduchworld etc the list goes on…

Dunno gets what Im saying I know marriage is not a pancea to all problems just would solve a lot in my life now

also To rc: are u a shadchan?I really don’t like those people who just try their hand in shidduchim without much thought and just put skirt with pants without realizing the emotional investment involved but that’s a whole other topic….

TO rc:not sure if I want to give out too much info abt myself on a public forum TO vogue:why are you intreasted in a guy like me?Just curious-beacause I feel like Im in between two worlds girls wanting college boys who wont respect my years of learning and yeshivish type girls who think Im not shtark if Im starting to transition over to the secular world

Regarding poppa bar abbas reply:dont think you really get my situation my learning is utmost in my mind so just getting a chavrusa somewhere or going to a yeshiva where I don’t fit in is not worth it for me but do want to start college and begin some degree Im 26 and its time How young are the guys in Landers?does anyone know?

Thanks so much to everyone for their replies Im not 63 by the way I would rather stay in lkwd and go at night somewhere if possible Accountings not for me would like to hear more abt that Yeshiva@IDT whats that all about? Also landers has a dorm situation?Im always davening that’s the only thing that works ultimatly