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Well michael jackson was Avenue S admour, and jordan was AVenue K, you know its probably jackson this time he’s the admour
Admour just gave everybody his great payos to payos smile ;}
Btw the gematriya of kapusta is 89!
The big limousine carrying the admour all of a sudden pulled in
So you are a mod! I prefer 182 more than 82 btw. stam azoy 😉
The Admoor is back! Today at 2 he’s holding a tish everybody come
Kapusta admit it who are you 80 or 72
My kids were so nice, even 3 yr old Shloimy wasn’t sucking is thumb, an 5 yr old Baila wasn’t chewing her hair
No pictures in the CR or personal info 😉
Kapusta, we all know YOU”RE 80
Thats because you’re 80
This guy pulled out his ID…
I said we come from the rebbishe Beis Michoel Yakson
The NAtional CHicken Museum opened up! IIts a good chol hamoed experience…
Just at the darkest moment of my life, as I was a bout to withe away,…
Its not me tiher, but I’ve heard a rumor that 80 is one of us!
I’m not gonna say who, but i know one of us is a secret mmod guess who
Well there should be a third group made especially for super shtultzy ppl like me 😉
I need to check if the chicken is treif as there is a +1% chance that a kapora chicken is treif;)
I don’t know about you guys but I’m veeeery yesheevish. I say “Chillin[t]”
All of a sudden the Admur began to preach, “When I was a young boy…
Admoor MJ and Admour MJ Junior went out to get some chili
I dont think they’re more treif (ok +1% bigger chance;)) and how is this tzaar baalei chaim – sounds like something PEDA would write!
If you’re gonna say that because there’s so many inexperienced people and it’s so ccrowded and pushy etc. well, in europe it was like that every single Thursday lekavod Shabbos people would get tons of chickens and it was pushy and all! Just because nowadays we only do heimishe stuff like that on erev yom kippur doesn’t make it tzaar baalei chaim!
She told me my nose is so big that she doesn’t want to date me anymore
Thanx, I now have a good zmira to sing on SUkkos! Anyways, who do you think comes to visit our sukkah rather than… Winnie the Pooh (bees mean honey)
Or during shiur!
Unfortunantely that’s what happened the gigantic rebbisheh sukkah collapsed!
sell them for profit in midbar yehuda!!!!
BAM BAM bam wow pow dow this sukkos is a chow
I saw one that said BEARDAD, BUBBY9
Admoor MJ finally composed the long awaited Sukkos zemira, and here it is (please e/b add a rhyming phrase)…
Bam bam bam yow yow yow the sukka’s cool dude!
I dont know if u hear dthis one… A sultan called over a rov and a karaite to find out who has the true version of yiddishkeit. They both took off their shoes upon entering, and the rov took his shoes with him subconciously b/c he was so worried how was he gonna shlugg up the karaite. The karaite looked smug. The karaite told the sultan – look how chutzpadik this rov is! Taking his shoes withim. “Whatcha gottasay?” asked sultan tzi der ruv. in der ruv hot gezugt, “Well last time in history a yid took off his shoes, it was moishe rabbeinu by the sneh. And well, his shoes were stolen by a karaite! So I took mine with me!” The karaite yelled, “SHeker v’chozov! There were no karaites back then!” “And you claim to ber real!”
But then they announced that all kaporos were nvailos and resold, so the moisrim weren’t really reported something halachically wrong 😉 (see kaparas thread)
I say chuh-lint too
Jothar, as far as i know kaporos are given as tzdokoh to ohrmeleit NOT resold. Second of all, why are you making up stories that the chickens are neveilos ( idk who your shechet is, but ours for sure doesn’t make nvailos) Why do u eat anny chickens at all- they’re all shechted in a rush! And legabey treifos who said they’re treif or more treif than any other chickens? And please explain what you mean by tzaar baalei chaim, more than any other shechting event.
So maybe you want to send your kids to my sukkah ?
Admoor MJ declared a yom teshuvah, and consorting his kabbalists, proclaimed the chet we must mesakein is moisrim!
I dont know if this joke was already said here, but I’ll say it and sorry if it was. There was a jewish actor named moish looking for a job. He finally found a job at the zoo. There was a monkey that knew how to do excellent tricks and died. No other monkey in the world knew how to do those tricks, so the zoo got lots of money from the monkey., SO when Mr. monkey died, they were too scared of their business to announce its death, so they hired this jewish actor to dress up in a monkey suit. The jew dressed up and was an excellent attraction at the zoo.
ONe day, as MOish was swinging really hard on the monkey bars, he accidentally flew off into the lions cage. Moish’s heart started beating, a huge sharp toothed lion was just awaken from its sleep. As the lion approached him, he managed to yell out, “SHema yisroel HashemELokainu HAshem Echad” The lion responded “”Boruch shem kvod malhhuso lolam voed” Moish freked out and said, “SHimon is that you!” “Moish is that you” responded the lion. “How long have you been working here.” All of a sudden the zebra from the next cage said, “Rabboisai, if you don’t want us a;ll to lose our jobs, keep it down.” 🙂
Refuah Sheleimah Bekorov!
The admurMJ police arrested a fleishige rocket to land on the moon cheese
but the rocket crashed half way because everybody ate up the pecholentium fuel, but the singing beans inside peoples stomachs powered the rocket back up
by taking a flight to the moon, on a cholent powered rocket
sorry, but if you’re just discussing it it is ok i guess. what’s wrong with young boys btw?
that there was a big forest fire in california, so…
the moiser ran off to an abandoned african island where he tried hard not to kill any lice on shabbos, but this angered admur mj (b/c he had lice)
It’s the alte minhag of klal yisroel to do kaporos with chickens. Just because there are mishandles and chickens occasionally (or not, idk, at least where i do it it never happened out of hundreds of chickens, but once it was unexpectandly cold and a few died, but that has nothing to do with the fact they were doing kaporos it could happen anytime) it doesn’t mean to chas veshalom stop the minhag! We have to work to solve the problems not eradicate the minhag hakodosh!
so i guess the shidduch worked even though he was a moiser…
that the admurMJ’s niggunim were ossur to listen to and didn’t deserve a hechsher. “MIsnagdim!” thought the heiligeh rebbe, as he took out his hip hop instruments to play a heiligeh niggun…
The heiligeh Admoor all of a sudden announced he was making a tish!