Bemused

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  • in reply to: Scoliosis Surgery Support? #673938

    Bemused
    Participant

    haifagirl- I was talking about my own comment! Your comment seems fine! 🙂

    in reply to: Scoliosis Surgery Support? #673936

    Bemused
    Participant

    Jose,

    I’m with you on the fact that chiropractic care isn’t the answer for some conditions, just as care from an MD isn’t the answer for some conditions. However…your continued display of lack of knowledge regarding chiropractic care (which may have been caused by your personal anecdote regarding your big toe- lack of knowledge isn’t shameful), evidenced by comparing chiropractic care to aspirin candy and placebos, instead of comparing it to, say, a root canal procedure or ROM exercises, comes across as silly to the many, many people who feel immensely grateful for the knowledge and expertise of their doctors of chiropractic, after giving up on other doctors.

    And haifagirl, if that isn’t a run-on sentence, I don’t know what is one. 🙂

    in reply to: Scoliosis Surgery Support? #673932

    Bemused
    Participant

    “it is very clear you do not have too much experience with good chiropractors if you think that it what they do is a big toe pinch and a massage. I come from a long line of chiropractors, and that remark was extremely inaccurate.”

    Oomis, I absolutely laughed out loud at Jose’s description. He obviously is coming from a place of lack of knowledge regarding competent chiropractic, similar to saying MD’s give out white jellybeans and make you stick you tongue out at them. It’s not worth getting offended when someone simply doesn’t have the knowledge, but to counteract the sting, I will tell you I have tremendous respect for the knowledge of expert chiropractors, who provide care for so many in ways that are less invasive and often more effective.

    in reply to: Insensitive Comments #685632

    Bemused
    Participant

    estherh,

    May Hashem send you a Refuah Shelaim B’karov. May you have good health and your strength back.

    Regarding the comment said to you…I was very inspired by Feivel’s comment on issue- perhaps it will help you as well.

    in reply to: Sefardi Recipes #826818

    Bemused
    Participant

    Thank you Chops, and thank you Mazal77 for your detailed description. I appreciate it!

    in reply to: Sefardi Recipes #826814

    Bemused
    Participant

    Mazal,

    How do you pronounce bazergan (which syllable stressed)? With what type of main dish do you serve it?

    in reply to: Having Proper Closure #673050

    Bemused
    Participant

    aries2756,

    You make good points; your sincerity is very apparent.

    I do wish to note that grieving is one place that I wish weren’t “clinicalized”, “psychologized”, and wrapped up in wise sounding therapeutic cubbies, EVEN with the “all-knowing” caveat of “of course, each process is highly individual”.

    I do know you had and have NO intention of doing so, but sometimes, categorizing the grieving process in the way you did has the inadvertent effect of doing so. Please excuse my fabricated words; I usually have a more sophisticated vocabulary. For grieving, though, sophistication goes out the window, and each mourner rides a painful, oftentimes excruciatingly lonely, and sometimes deeply spiritual journey that cannot be wrapped up in any wise-sounding manner. This area is untouchable.

    All your other points are terrific and on-the-mark. Please don’t take offense, and thank you for the rest of your well-spoken words.

    in reply to: Screen Names #1176004

    Bemused
    Participant

    hereorthere,

    Zakein means an elderly person- someone with wisdom and life experience. Chashuv in the sense used here is someone who personifies Torah ideals.

    Life can be very hard; try to remember that you are worthy of life and therefore capable of doing good with it. You have inherent dignity despite any circumstances- stand tall and talk to the One who is interested in hearing your thoughts: Hashem.

    in reply to: What Is a Tuna Bagel? #703769

    Bemused
    Participant

    Dear lkwdbubby,

    Please note that the “tuna beigel” term means different things to different people. You may not want to use the term when speaking with a Shadchan or when inquiring among your friends for a Shadchan, as you might give over a completely erroneous impression of the girl in question.

    For your own sake, please realize that not everyone thinks of tuna beigel “as a Chasidishe bochur who learnt in Mir or a Yeshiva like that, in other words, it is a basically good Chasidishe bochur who has been in the Yeshivishe world”.

    It is used to refer to multiple types, and you are best off describing what you are interested in without relying on labels.

    Hatzlacha

    in reply to: Health Care #671589

    Bemused
    Participant

    “What exactly is your problem?”

    I’ve already stated it quite succinctly in another thread, and those questions (or “problems”) were not addressed. Copy/paste and repetition is not necessary; if you were unable to respond then, I’m sure nothing has changed in the interim.

    “I think this thread has reached its natural end”

    That’s a statement with which I can agree. It probably ended before it even began, in a sense.

    All the best.

    in reply to: Health Care #671583

    Bemused
    Participant

    Charliehall,

    I understand that the “we understand better than the masses” works for some; it doesn’t work for some of us here. You haven’t responded to my original questions, and I don’t believe there are answers that could morally and ethically satisfy them. Simplifying it into “do you really think insurance is immoral?” doesn’t lend credence to the “reform” positions. I think healthcare insurance is VERY moral, that is why I pay for it over laptops, a nice car, and big TV’s. It is sad that good people are so married to party line…I am glad that I allow myself to vote Democrat or Republican according to issues and stances, without feeling allegiance in the least to any organized party.

    in reply to: Health Care #671580

    Bemused
    Participant

    “I’ve rebutted them; it is just that some folks don’t want to admit that the consequences of the current system are that people are dying from lack of access to health care.”

    No. You did not. You avoided them completely, and discussed a tangent to fill in for the obvious: there are no answers. The health care ra-ra cheerleaders have no response to those commonsense questions. I will not repeat them; I was quite clear in another thread. This is sad for the US, sad for we hardworking people who are happy to pay our insurance and are not looking for a handout, sad for the perpetrators of the Robinhood approach to be so confused on moral issues.

    in reply to: Health Care #671568

    Bemused
    Participant

    This is so sad. The arguments are become more and more far fetched, twisted into a pretzel to defend the indefensible. I’ve posted serious questions on health care reform in the CR; any responses were tangential at best. So sad that defenders of “health care reform” (a misnomer; I would use the term “health care erosion”) have not been able to rebut basic questions challenging this mess.

    600kilo- your analogy to Sedom is apt and on the mark.

    in reply to: Smoking Habit #670722

    Bemused
    Participant

    aj,

    Is it at all possible to engage in “some hock” without smoking over it? Or is there only one way to hock? Just wondering.

    in reply to: Attention Mods #1048992

    Bemused
    Participant

    Oomis, I didn’t mean the poster used these exact words. There are other ways to convey the aforementioned sentiment, quite effectively and insidiously. I did not mean the statements as literal quotes.

    in reply to: Attention Mods #1048990

    Bemused
    Participant

    “People should be able to express their opinions, even if the mods disagree with their view, as long as no one is calling someone stupid or irreligious, etc.”

    Oomis, there are much more subtle and insidious ways of putting down groups of Jews even without using the “direct” language you reference.

    YWN has criteria for expressions of diversity, and there has been some nice, respectful dialogue along these lines on a number of threads. Shivim Panim L’Torah has been expressed beautifully on this site, without need for “My position is rational, intelligent, and holy, and yours is that of a simple-minded, irrational, hypocritical and fundamentalist fool”.

    exactly, thank you bemused

    in reply to: Public School Kids Throwing Sefarim #669887

    Bemused
    Participant

    Smalltowngirl,

    May you always have special Siyata D’shamay in bringing up your son, and may he continue to have the strength of character to look like a proud Jew wherever he goes.

    in reply to: Public School Kids Throwing Sefarim #669876

    Bemused
    Participant

    “the fact is no person may do something like that in the street”

    Of course. I assume that’s a given with everyone.

    in reply to: Public School Kids Throwing Sefarim #669873

    Bemused
    Participant

    smalltowngirl,

    I agree, son sounds like he looks like a Day School kid! So you are right, looks can be deceiving. Your son sounds like he is making a Kiddush Hashem, and is proud of Jewishness. Chazak! 🙂

    in reply to: Public School Kids Throwing Sefarim #669870

    Bemused
    Participant

    smalltowngirl,

    Generally, one is able to differentiate Public School kids from Day School kids by their appearance. I’m not sure why you would question working’s vision.

    in reply to: Health Care Overhaul #669695

    Bemused
    Participant

    charliehall,

    I’m sorry that you were unable to address my question directly; that was what I was afraid of. I’m even more sure of my position on this than before, in recognition that this is indeed, a partisan “issue” rather than a humanitarian one. I wish it weren’t true, but this thread, and the lack of direct response is very revealing.

    in reply to: Health Care Overhaul #669685

    Bemused
    Participant

    “Bemused,

    There is no need for the government to sponsor health insurance for anyone other than those who can’t get it themselves, such as the poor who can’t afford it, those with pre-existing conditions for whom no sane insurer would ever issue a policy, or the elderly whom no sane insurer would ever insure. France and Israel cover everyone with no government programs (although the government does subsidize the cost and regulate the coverage).”

    Charliehall,

    Perhaps there were too many comments for you to have time to read mine through. I stated quite clearly that I know the numbers, and people making slightly below mine are mostly eligible for health care programs we already have in place. Anyone above those income levels, such as myself, is making choices about purchasing insurance versus purchasing a better lifestyle.

    Your response did not answer my query at all. You either did not have time to read my question, or there really IS no answer, and it’s all about politics, not about health care for those who “can’t afford” it. Can I trouble you to reread my initial comment in order to specifically address the question?

    in reply to: Health Care Overhaul #669678

    Bemused
    Participant

    charliehall?

    I saw you posted on the main page tonight; are you able to provide any answers on this topic?

    in reply to: Applesauce For Latkes #1189190

    Bemused
    Participant

    Sounds good 🙂

    in reply to: Applesauce For Latkes #1189188

    Bemused
    Participant

    “just gimme the latke!!!”

    I’m starting to think Jax (aka asdfjkl) has rejoined us…If it’s you, Jax (!!!), welcome back :).

    in reply to: Health Care Overhaul #669668

    Bemused
    Participant

    Dear Charliehall,

    In light of your comment, and being that I believe you are an intelligent individual, I would like to address a question to you:

    My income is slightly above the income limits for government insurance (JerseyCare, etc). I purchase insurance, and therefore go without things that I consider luxuries, such as vacations, nice cars, high-end electronics, etc. I personally have no interest in “help” from the government for this, particularly the specter of the public option. I know families from both the UK and Canada who have come to the USA for more timely medical testing and treatment, and pitied them for the apparent deficits in their respective countries that necessitated them making such a trip when in ill health. Regardless, I am thankful I can purchase insurance, and don’t think the government should be sponsoring my health care so that I can have enough left over to buy a nice car, high-end electronics, or eat out.

    Anyone making a bit less than me is eligible for government health care assistance, such as JerseyCare (I know the numbers for eligibility). So why would I advocate for the government to sponsor health care for people who are not poor enough to be eligible for JerseyCare (or similar in other States)? Why would I want my taxes to sponsor health care so that people in my position can take trips abroad, spiff up their homes, buy a nicer car, eat out at restaurants, or purchase more expensive clothing? Insurance is a necessity, the above items are not. Why should taxes go to help people pay for non-essentials?

    If someone opts to purchase a flat-screen TV, nice car, go to fast-food joints frequently instead of cheaper homemade food, take nice little vacations, etc, that is their choice. My taxes should pay for their choice? As I said, the truly poor are already eligible for the health care programs.

    Can you shed some light onto why I should want taxes to sponsor individuals’ choices?

    in reply to: Shidduch World #1013813

    Bemused
    Participant

    In deference to haifagirl, I believe it’s “might not” rather than “may not” :).

    in reply to: Shidduch World #1013812

    Bemused
    Participant

    Dear Shidduch Solution,

    Please don’t feel disheartened; you are doing a good thing. May Hashem bless you with success. YWN is a wonderful place, and the CR can be interesting. However, please realize that the CR likely has hundreds of readers who don’t join in to comment, and every good place also has the potential to be a clearinghouse for mocking.

    I did not bother posting on this thread before, because I didn’t feel it was necessary to “validate” or applaud someone’s efforts to do a Mitzvah. Realize that many other people likely read, think “that’s a nice thing to do”, and move on. So, if you’re feeling bewildered by the rather negative feedback, it may not be reflective of the majority.

    Hatzlacha Rabba

    in reply to: Help with Two-Year Old’s Eating Habit #669206

    Bemused
    Participant

    smartcookie,

    I’m not sure why my comment wasn’t acknowledged, but have you tried my suggestion in the past?

    in reply to: Help with Two-Year Old’s Eating Habit #669200

    Bemused
    Participant

    Try serving him very soft foods that “slip” down easily, in order to transition back into the “food in, chew, swallow” mode; you are eliminating the “chew” component to help him get past the food-holding stage.

    When he gets over the hump of his present stage by swallowing foods like yogurt, applesauce, etc, progress to slightly firmer textures. By then, he will have hopefully transitioned out of his current “food-holding” stage and will quickly slip back into his old, normal eating patterns.

    in reply to: How to Greet Non-Jews During the Holiday Season #671455

    Bemused
    Participant

    I say Happy Holidays and I notice that my non-Jewish colleagues say Happy Holidays to each other as well, as well as the standard.

    in reply to: Lessons in Language Arts #668974

    Bemused
    Participant

    This is a great place to discuss semantics, syntax, morphology and related areas. As a fairly proficient writer of the English language, I would love to see improvement in these skills.

    Instead of insulting other posters, whose primary language may or may not be English, why don’t we all bring mistakes we notice to this thread, so that posters can benefit from the discussion without feeling attacked, and threads can stay on topic without being hijacked in the name of “education”? Of course, those who are not irritated by errors need not post here at all.

    I think this alternative may make everyone happier.

    in reply to: AMAZING STORY MUST READ #668913

    Bemused
    Participant

    I guess and Oomis have better skills. I had no problem understanding the story, and I’ll bet that you (haifagirl) had no trouble understanding the plot and content of it as well.

    I won’t repeat my comment; just reread if needed.

    in reply to: English Music #746396

    Bemused
    Participant

    “Music is music. Melodies can be used to uplift the spirit or they can be used in degrading ways. Isn’t it far better to take a song and elevate it spiritually”

    I agree. With the exception of music from forbidden origins (such as Avodah Zara), some music is simply refined and uplifting, and some of music is degrading, as Oomis notes, or is the catalyst for lewd movements or less than spiritual atmosphere. A “Jewish” label on a cd is no “hechsher”, and some of our refined and uplifting tunes originate from less than stellar places.

    in reply to: Jewish Doctor Death Penalty #668899

    Bemused
    Participant

    “I’ve had two different rabbis tell me that it is not permitted for a Jew to serve on a jury on a capital case in the United States because the standards for administering a death penalty fall far below what the Torah requires even for Noachide courts.”

    I’ve heard that as well.

    in reply to: AMAZING STORY MUST READ #668908

    Bemused
    Participant

    haifagirl,

    I think that’s enough. We all have a pet peeve, and you confront yours frequently here. Sometimes, a little self control is in order; it’s beginning to sound like something clinical.

    in reply to: The Post-Shidduch Crisis #668660

    Bemused
    Participant

    “People should spend time with their families, and that’s it. There’s no reason to socialize with anyone who is not your family.”

    That’s not frumkeit.

    Have you ever benefited from a family with an “open door” policy? I guess when you learned in E”Y you never ate by anyone, and I assume you have never opened your door and heart to someone who needed a warm meal or a listening ear. There’s a lot of space between young couples inviting each other to socialize, and “people should spend time with their families, and that’s it”.

    Nuance is an important word.

    in reply to: Should We Give The H1N1 Vaccine For Kids #671952

    Bemused
    Participant

    NY Mom,

    Yes, it does! 🙂

    in reply to: Should We Give The H1N1 Vaccine For Kids #671949

    Bemused
    Participant

    NY Mom,

    I didn’t take offense at all, I don’t have a problem. But it IS offensive to speak so mockingly of those that are following their doctor’s orders.

    I think you didn’t mean your off the cuff remark- we all say things “in the passion of the moment”.

    in reply to: Should We Give The H1N1 Vaccine For Kids #671945

    Bemused
    Participant

    Hey, NYMom,

    “Give it up! As many times as you write it, whoever doesn’t want to understand, will continue to refuse to accept what you are saying! They don’t understand and they don’t WANT to understand.”

    I personally don’t have a problem with the shot, but there’s room for other opinions, particularly when some doctors are saying to hold off! I think if someone’s doctor said to hold off, the patient absolutely DOES want to understand, and they are fully understanding the fact that it’s important to follow their own doctor’s advice.

    EDITED

    in reply to: The Post-Shidduch Crisis #668599

    Bemused
    Participant

    I’m wondering if perhaps the problems Jothar’s Rav associated with workplace/joint vacations or meals issues are not that “untznius things” happened as a result of same, but that overly familiar interaction leads to meandering thoughts and shades of disappointment in one who was previously enamored with his wife. That can be a shalom bayis killer, however subtle and slowly.

    Perhaps this is EXACTLY why the divorce rate amongst the general populace is so rampant. Perhaps there is a world of difference between politeness in the workplace (thank you, Mrs. SoandSo), nodding good morning to the Mrs. Neighbor, and laughing/joking, sharing a light moment, first name basis with female colleagues, joint vacations/meals that promote shared light moments and shared laughter/fun.

    The general populace, who has an abundance of experience interacting with opposite genders, seem to have quite a challenge in the “staying married” department.

    I know that some couples are able to have joint meals in which the men are able to greet courteously (not over familiarly) and thank sincerely for the food, inserting specific comments of thanks, and not engage in light conversation between genders. The enjoyment of the shared meal is for the two wives to enjoy each others company and the two husbands to enjoy each others company. I don’t know Jothar’s Rav, but I don’t think that in general, the above scenario is what Rabbanim are concerned about.

    in reply to: Do Teens Deserve an Allowance? #668218

    Bemused
    Participant

    Completely agree

    in reply to: Do Teens Deserve an Allowance? #668215

    Bemused
    Participant

    Thanks for stopping by again, yoyo! 🙂 And yes, I look forward to when your children are on the market; quality marriage material! 🙂

    in reply to: Do Teens Deserve an Allowance? #668214

    Bemused
    Participant

    pookie, I’m really confused now. I still don’t have any questions for yoyo. I wasn’t “speaking” to him, I was commenting on his remarks. If you have any questions, go right ahead and ask him; I’m fine.

    in reply to: Do Teens Deserve an Allowance? #668210

    Bemused
    Participant

    I’m sure. There are some non-luxury expenses such as laundry and toiletries. I’d imagine most parents pay for these, and the child doesn’t need an “allowance” in order to have these expenses paid.

    Some families view weekly allowance as geared toward non-essentials (“pocket-money”), and others use the term to mean the money given for essentials that are not directly paid for by the parent.

    I use the term for the former.

    in reply to: Do Teens Deserve an Allowance? #668208

    Bemused
    Participant

    pookie,

    Ask him what? Shaatra and I were responding to this comment of yoyo:

    “high school students don’t need more than 5 dollars a week, in my opinion.

    and this one:

    “but why should they buy lunch everyday??? are you forgetting we’re in somewhat of a recession?? and if they do buy lunch whats wrong with a roll which is around a 1 or yogurt and a muffin???? most teens i know buy this or actually bring lunch from home.”

    Is there something else you’d like to ask yoyo?

    in reply to: Do Teens Deserve an Allowance? #668206

    Bemused
    Participant

    I imaagine that yoyo’s children receive meals, basic wardrobe, school supplies, and some extras here and there from yoyo.

    Yoyo’s children probably learn the value of a dollar, are learning the difference between saving for a wanted item versus “spending in two seconds”, are are likely not spoiled to boot! The probably also have learned that it’s completely unnecessary to buy a slice of pizza and coke “every Monday and Thursday”, when other lunch options are available.

    Yoyo, let us know when your children are of marriageable age! 🙂 They’re going to be a great catch!

    in reply to: Great Experience at a Restaurant #667927

    Bemused
    Participant

    “hey who isnt ;-)?? Though I think what Phyllis is saying makes a lot of sense. Disputing it is being naive.”

    Uh, I sometimes do things for chessed. Even in my business. With no thought to “make a buck”, or somehow benefit business-wise. Thankfully, I know others who do the same. And, uh, I don’t think I’m naive. I do try to be nice, though. I know that I can practice chessed through my work in the same way I can practice it at home.

    Name-calling is certainly not within the parameters of chessed, though :). Instead of calling someone with whom you disagree “naive”, why not recognize that different folks think about things in different ways?

    in reply to: Great Experience at a Restaurant #667920

    Bemused
    Participant

    I too work in a business environment, and interface with many in the business world. B”H, I am zoche to have met many people who are true mentchen and exhibit true kindness, separate and apart from their thoughts about how to make another dollar.

    It’s OK if we disagree; I accept that you see mercenary intentions, and I’m sure you accept that I see kindness intentions. No one would like a world of clones- it’s ok to be different! 🙂

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1173777

    Bemused
    Participant

    I hear you. I agree, we should not knock anyone. Since it’s not the first time that a poster has knocked someone’s joke here, I posted above. Thank you for clarifying.

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 319 total)


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