Forum Replies Created
April 26, 2018 4:38 pm at 4:38 pm in reply to: Car Taken For Joy Ride In BMG Parking Lot And Smashed!! #1512154
It would still be a chilul Hashem to involve police. You guys are wrong on this one, they WILL learn their lesson if their Rosh Yeshiva and parents know about it out of sheer embarrassment. They are only 9th graders and not so independent from their parents. This means they take it to heart when doing something foolish and having it pointed out by adults whom they respect. I dont see what cops would help aside for increasing hatred towards Yidden in the Lakewood area which really doesnt need any support.
regarding Moshiach ben Yosef. Arent there some who dont hold that there will be ben Yosef only Ben Dovid? Also I read in a book on ARIZAL that he told the Chaveirim that they should pray Moshiach ben Yosef shouldnt die in their generation and that soon after they realized it was referring to himself and they werent zoche?
Having said that there is something to say about AC being very unnatural. Someone mentioned heat in winter. Not the same since heat is a natural source and can and always be used and was used in winter via fire. Nowadays we just have more compatible ways for heat in the house such as heaters/radiators. But when has anyone in history up to the last 100 years been able to cool off in the summer and fight the insane heat! Don’t forget that in general most of our tech has only come about in the last 100 years and maybe even less than that if you count the fact that technology has only been refined to a more practical use in the last few decades. Up until then the world has been living pretty much the same for hundreds and thousands of years! That’s why they also had much less of an issue applying halachos from shulchan aruch since it targeted the same type of era. It’s a great chessed to have all this tech that we take for granted and it’s something that previous generations only dreamed of. True the houses were built in ways to withstand heat and welcome ventilation and etc., But still…and I’m not even mentioning refrigerators,electicity/lighting, toilets, running water…the basic needs of living. Imagine you had none of that right now.
Is it a new trend to quote the whole OP opening comment? I mean we’ll get it even if you just quote the screen name or one or two lines. What’s with repasting the whole opening again for every reply?
This will be interesting…
Just work with and for Yidden.
Come on, what’s 5000 dollars for finding a shidduch? Seriously some shadchanim straight up charge that if not more.
“It’s a good thing that the possibility of a sheilah has been recognized, but it’s nothing to get very excited about. Just follow your Rav.”
-Indeed nothing to get excited about, unless you are a staunch supporter of the OK that is. Then of course you take it as a personal attack on your “type”.April 17, 2018 5:37 pm at 5:37 pm in reply to: Getting a ride with someone from the opposite gender #1507847
“Does it make a difference whether the woman is single or married?”
– of course it makes a difference, if shes not married it can be a great shidduch opp!
oh toi…. ; )
actually, make that 14th ave between 44th and 45th to be exact-boro park
There are quite a few, a good one is on 12th avenue between 43rd and 45th street.April 9, 2018 5:22 pm at 5:22 pm in reply to: Is it reasonable to tell a 21 yr old boy to date a 24 yr old girl !!!!!! #1504216
actually a 24 year old girl isnt always more mature than a 21 year old guy seeing how girls tend to stay living at home until marriage no matter how much money they make or how settled they are for the time being. While guys start traveling around either for Yeshiva at a very young age or simply rent with roomates away from home, at any rate they have experience living on their own and fending for themselves.April 9, 2018 4:10 pm at 4:10 pm in reply to: Will d.b. Electronics succeed against amazon in the long haul? #1504160
um…probably not? Do you know what Amazon is?
How could they live in space or the moon?
And just like we say a brocho on a tree, wouldnt we be able to appreciate all the rest of creations which we know nothing about even more if we knew about them?
jj- you cant judge the victims/survivors of the holocaust. What they saw there would make anyone go mad.March 22, 2018 10:48 pm at 10:48 pm in reply to: Is there any food better than an excellent potato kugel? #1497248
Tortilla chips and salsa.
Also shmurah matza with just about anything, tuna,avocado,egg salad,salt…..oh so great!
Joseph-thats exactly my point. Besides its the same concept as when we say “עשה למענך אם לא למעננו” also “עשה למענך והושיענו”
There are disputes though if we need to be involved and mezarez the Geula or if its not our business to intervene and meddle with the keitz….but for both opinions we for sure must wait regardless.
Jj-also I do agree that achdus is key. I truly believe that if ALL Yidden would truly be as one and all differences would be put aside, then Moshiach would instantly arrive. If we were truly together no individual or nation would be able to touch us.
Yossi- Israel for the time being seems to be within our possession, but that too seems to have been a forced move. Pretty much all Gedolei Yisrael and Rebbe’s were opposed to creating a state of Israel whether they still opposed after the establishment of it or not. Besides Israel was in our possession many times and we have lost it many times. So is it really a step towards Moshiach? When the time is right even if it had been occupied it would have been no problem for Hashem to take it over again.
Jj-all the suffering must be mechaper for something no? Besides isn’t one of the prophecies that Yidden would no longer be able to endure the suffering and cry out to Hashem and then Moshiach would arrive?
Another point is you would think if the world would end as we know it via war or whatever, a new era would begin? Hence the era of Moshiach…
Toi- so according to your approach, even if there was a world war and 2/3 of the world destroyed, what would make you think that Moshiach should arrive in that scenario?
Wouldn’t you at least expect it to happen?
Dont some believe by Kabbalah that its actually good to whistle? Wasnt there a lot of whistling by Farbrengens? Whats the reason for it?March 19, 2018 12:17 am at 12:17 am in reply to: So many feelings toys r us is going out of business!!!!😢 #1493695
who cares, in this day and age you cant hold on to anything. Everything is dispensible, replaceable, and changing. These old time stores are a thing of the past, besides they always sold so many things that were returned by previous customers, put some clear packing tape on it and back onto the shelves.
Besides kids are into different things nowadays, just like we couldnt understand how the previous generations were all excited about rag dolls and wooden horses, same applies to this generation.
kitzur- if the woman has a diploma it definitely does not mean that she is smart and he is not. I am trying to figure out the connection.
I think we already clarified quite a few times that store does not refer to working at the Dollar tree or CVS stocking shelves at minimum wage minus taxes. There are enough yiddishe owned businesses that will hire a responsible yid to work or manage the business and will pay much more than minimum wage especially if they see you are serious about it. They know that you need to live and if married need to support a family and they will usually work with you on a salary that is livable.
oyyoyyoy- You raise the point we are all trying to make, its exactly the reason why its a problem in our times that we have no choice but to deal with. And its not the smartphones per se, its the whole internet in general, exclusively social media and yes also smartphones which have the ability to run all kinds of social media and communications (whatsapp) on the go which exposes these girls to everything whether it is just a false sense of reality that someone is trying to portray, or anything similar.
The competition has no limits and people are constantly trying to show others how “fabulous” their life is.
This is a serious issue and prevents many shidduchim and negatively affects many marriages or even ruins them.
I give props to the chassidim in boro park and williamsburg who live such modest lives raising over ten kids in whatever conditions they need to since they know what really matters. If they need to use yiddishe organizations for assistance they do, aside from the husband working hard. I know that there are many chassidish people who are sitting real well on the wealthy side, but again I am not referring to those people.
The way I see it is as long as the guy is willing to work and has a decent job, it should not stand in the way of getting married if its a real match. To those girls who wont settle for any less than a doc or accountant and a life of “glamour”, I say good day.
Schneubs- upwards of $100,000
Meno- “I was unemployed but I had a degree and a plan other than “I’ll figure it out”.
wow a degree and a plan, sure doesnt sound like, ill figure it out.
Now that i come to think of it, having a “degree” and a “plan” and being broke, is just so much better than having an actual job that brings in enough cash to support.
oopss I didnt mean meno I meant I agree with Malach, they both start with M.
Meno- the time being meaning a good few years until kids start to actually get expensive. Also time being meaning guys work on getting better or higher paying jobs/positions simultaneously.
Noone knows what would happen in the future people can have great jobs and lose them too.This is where Bitachon comes in.
Another explanation for time being can be that until then, he can use his own money to support without even needing a cent from his wifes salary, when the time comes and more money is needed to support, then maybe she can use some of her precious dollars towards the family.
If it cannot be accepted that some good guys just have average jobs, i guess they just dont deserve to get married. עכשיו נודע הדבר.
shopping- when i mentioned store i meant jewish owned business or office or whatever i didnt mean at the dollar tree making $10 an hour minus taxes with the threat of getting fired at any moment. But even managing yiddishe owned business/store, restaurant, or working at an office isnt good enough for girls/women nowadays. The reaction would be this; ” oh, cool”. Or “oh, ya thats, thats nice”, and then you know its already over.
I agree with meno, if its a good guy who makes enough to support then why is it such an issue.
Why do the parents and friends have to instill this craziness into the girls mind like, “listen honey, if he doesnt make a minimum of $70K then hes not for you, do you want to live in the street? Do you want to see your children starve when he cant put any food on the table?”
Does anyone think that if someone currently manages a business or has some other average job that he plans to stay in it forever? What I really dont get is that almost all women work nowadays and in many cases make more than the men. So why are we so worried financially? Oh if she has to leave for pregnancy, ever heard of maternity leave? Ya those things exist and they get off days with pay! Better conditions than men!
The funniest requests are from those girls who want a great looking guy, who is a full time yeshiva bochur and also a full time doctor or lawyer. That joke never gets old. Oh and also has time to babysit the kids while shes at work.
And to all those posters giving personal advice, please keep it to yourselves. I didn’t start this topic to rant about my own life, rather the general picture of nowadays shidduch problem and many people I know who have encountered it. It is a known issue of how nowadays women disrespect men’s jobs if they are not up to their “standards”. Also many good hard working guys who are embarrassed to even look for a shidduch because they will be shunned down right away by either the shadchan or girl as soon as that question arises of “so what do you do”? And unfortunately, you don’t have to wait for more than a second after you’ve met to be asked that. I wonder what would happen if noone would ask until after 7 or 8 dates. Would the girl not care as much what the guy does if they gave the chance to see that they found a great guy but with an average or above average job and planning to move ahead in life as well? Makes me wonder.
And then the girls wake up to see they are over 30 and still single. Now let’s see them find their dream boy. Will they have many candidates?
Shopping613- your name says it all. You are one of those people who just want a husband to throw money at you so you can shop all day on his expense.
What does black and white have to do with anything? Not everyone can afford to spend their whole day in yeshiva.
Stores sound bummy and are managed by bums? Now I’m starting to understand the reasons for shidduch “crisis”.
7-15 people? How did we get that far already? I guess on the first date we should talk about how we plan to support 20 kids because hey you never know right?
Meno you were making 0$ a month, who did you marry, were you 18 or 19 when you got married so noone expected anything, do you come from a rich family and did your parents agree to support?
So even when a man has a respectable job and is a hard worker and able to support all on his own, its not good enough since he isnt some bigshot accountant or lawyer. Its just funny how women are all about these equal rights and think so highly of themselves with their fancy careers, but yet they still need the mans money, my money mine! Your money also mine!
What happened to building a family and growing together, I know the Torah is an old book but some of us still believe in it.
Black lives matter
Canada dry green tea ginger ale
Not sure that most travellers and students/groups are staying at that yeshiva though…
Forsalino- cheapest ever
“You are supporting them by staying at a Hotel and flying in”
Well ya, thats enough support, as well as transportation all around poland im assuming you arent just walking everywhere, im also sure some people buy souvenirs as well as visit other stores, or other attractions around the area
Good point gadolhadorah-. Especially the fact of educating. I mean at the end of the day unless your ultra extreme chassidish or chareidi, you just have to accept the fact that we use this for daily life and it’s not going away. Even the ultra extremest have issues curbing it from the communities..
And true, even physical cards are slowly phasing out. I guess now we’ll have to focus on what wallet (smartphone) we whip out.
They report the payment or they report the person?
“The only time I cringe, is when I see the fancily dressed woman with a fancy carriage buying all goodies and paying with foodstamps”
@teal- we had to go there didn’t we. Was the fancy looking woman also wearing a sheitel?
Many spots in manhattan are business and not as bad. Besides you can use shmiras einayim and look down at your dale amos. Its still not as much in your face as staring at a computer screen hoping things dont pop up.
Wasn’t the menorah also shown of fire? Or was the gold just put in the fire?
I guess some things are just easier to manage than others. You can do real harm with a hammer or you can fix with it. But again how many people are tempted to go smashing things with a hammer? It’s just not shoved in your face like things that pop up online even on normal sites. Even going to a bank website you will see untznius pictures of women. Now you might say when you go outside you might also. True that’s a good point but outside you likely won’t stare and are also in a different mindset. Apparently it’s just unavoidable online. You can try blocking as much you can, but you most likely will come across many images and words in order to know to block those things as well. So it’s like taking the hit in order to fix.and I’m not one who is against internet use I realize we need it and it’s part of daily life at this point, but it’s a real shame that there’s really no way to not see images or content you don’t want to.
In a way it should be managed easier than tv since you choose what you want to see and what to search for, problem is even then things are always attached to everything like pests.
Well ya credit is very different today. Your not borrowing from a private person or establishment it’s more like a huge credit company amex, visa etc. Also nowadays people use credit more for building their score and racking points. Most importantly though, are the added protection benefits one has when using a credit card. Disputing services that weren’t provided, defective products, getting additional warranty or time to return things and lots more. Probably the safest method of payment unless you don’t want to be tracked. Then its just cold hard cash. Pay and done.
Still sketchy. To be honest forget tv and internet. All technology can and is used for negative purposes. So what is the spiritual meaning behind it all. And you cant really compare it to a knife which can be used for good or bad. Technology is just so much easier to use and is more tempting than going on a stabbing spree. I mean say for instance if internet makes it so much easier for one to watch a shiur or listen, why is there such a risk of stumbling on something negative while searching for it? Even if you watch a shiur or clip on YouTube, you are bombarded by recommended videos with non tznius titles or thumbnails. I guess it is what it is.
JJ and all. If you read the opening statement it wasn’t only about shidduchim. Ya we get the whole middos thing. It’s only a thought provoking question not meant to dwell your whole life upon. Besides noone ever thinks to impress do they(sarcasm). If your in the moment you might as well make a statement.
beisyosef “easily one of the dumbest questions I’ve ever seen in the CR.”
“And yes I’m from Flatbush and even there we don’t judge abt such stupidity (although we do judge when such questions are asked lol)”
– well that’s real nice. Also nice how the mods let those sincere comments through. I actuall replied with answers to you and blue cash, but hey it’s fair only for one person to be nasty. So we will never know why it’s called blue cash. Unless you pick up on it in my previous comment where I gave the reason for it. Obviously it was too deep for some to catch it though.
Really it can go both ways. If you ever heard someone telling over a story of some rich guy they know, it’s like, wow this guy is loaded, did you see what type of card he was using, solid metal!
Or it’s like wow this guy is loaded he pays everything straight up in cash! At Macy’s he took out a billfold of 200 franklins.
But with Rich guys it’s obvious so either way works I guess.
Zahava- I didn’t say you have to carry 2000 bucks. A few blue hundreds are enough to do the trick.
Icarisma- that’s the point, can credit cards leave an impression of debt life?
Ctlawyer- thats a creative solution, but that still doesn’t prove that you don’t have a problem holding on to a credit card. Most people who pay debit is because they don’t have a credit card. Besides it’s unwise to pay debit especially if you have a credit in case of dispute/rewards so that would definitely show that you don’t have a credit card because why else would you pay debit? I know funds are drawn right away if that’s your thing but your much safer using a credit card and paying right away if it makes you feel better.
Daas- your right I’m not saying to deliberately try to impress any date by the method you pay that’s why i specifically wrote if you are already in that moment you might as well know the best way. And it does leave some sort of impression because people do sometimes look for these subtle hints or pick up on them. And it’s ok to make a “little bit” of an impression here and there. Better in action than in words and make a fool of yourself later. They do speak louder, actions that is.