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On the ball – he is a Rosh Yeshiva that all were recently saying Tehilim for and who had a name added. He has now BH made a remarkable recovery (my sons saw him in Camp Agudah this summer). I was his Talmid many years ago when he gave the Chulin shiur in Yeshiva. Does that give you enough of a hint?
an Israeli Yid
The line I’ve used is “for religious reasons, my wife doesn’t shake hands with men, and I don’t shake hands with women”. By first mentioning that my wife doesn’t shake hands with men, I’ve avoided making them think that I think that women are lesser than I am.
FWIW, I can also say that I was told by a well-known Rosh Yeshiva, widely accepted as one of the premier Poskim in the American Yeshivish world, that if it’s necessary, I can shake hands with a woman in a business context, since it’s not Derech Chiba. Accordingly, when necessary or to avoid causing offense (such as when traveling in Europe, where religious restrictions are not as widely accepted), I’ll shake a woman’s extended hand – though I’ll not extend mine first.
Good luck to you,
an Israeli Yid
Write or wrong – I sympathize with you. I also note that you may want to consult your Rav, or a Rav with experience dealing with similar situations, before rejecting another Derech for your son. Your fight is to keep him a Torah-observant Jew, and that and that alone should be your focus. Externals are nice, and keeping all the “syugim” that have been set up are important, but rejecting paths that have the potential to win the main battle because they don’t preserve the less key aspects may be a case of Tafasta Meruba.
Re: Rabbi Slifkin – he is unquestionably controversial and not for everyone. That being said, please do note that he has Haskamos on several of his books from Rav Yisrael Belsky. Additionally, there are those who reject his books in general, but say that if one has a need for such Hashkafos to answer questions in Emuna, they are acceptable as a Bdieved.
Hatzlacha Rabba,
an Israeli Yid