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  • in reply to: Getting kids to behave at Shabbos Meal #903456

    just let them be kids– if you were that age you would behave that way- Maybe ASK your kids what they want to do? maybe switch off each meal with another kid to be a shabbos ‘tatty’ or mommy, maybe let them make kiddush in additino to you….

    or are you embarrassed of your kids because your in-laws, or other guests are coming??? remember kids will be kids…. you cant change it…

    in reply to: mazal of a house #875488

    i would speak with ‘das torah’ before you buy.

    Is it cheaper? if so use the difference is price to give to tzedaka, and im sure it will be a zchus for you and your family.

    in reply to: Unfiltered Internet #876582

    I have a quasi-filter, i use the filtering that is installed on my computer with my anti-virus– is that good?

    in reply to: How are the Syrians so rich? #872096

    I remember hearing (a few times) that the syrians had a bracha for wealth because they always gave alot of their money to beautify the bais hamikdash.

    in reply to: Joining Hatzalah #873020

    2scents: The schar of saving a life is more the learning– although learning is still neccesary. Passion to join hatzalah is good too. (the big question is if you would join hatzalah if you would not be able to have all the lights on the car!– if you would then you mean it— if not– become part of chaverim or shomrim)

    in reply to: How Can They Be So CRUEL!? #872850

    When Yeshivas will care about the talmidim’s future and their yidshikeit, instead of their own Kavod, the world will change.

    Till then its all about $$.

    not that you dont have it, but they want to keep a top name with guys they think are the top.

    Tell your brother– he will get into a yeshiva that is perfect for him, and in 10 years to look where all those guys are– chances are that you will all meet in Lakewood, and half of the guys will be in a worse off situation.

    Good luck!

    in reply to: sibs of otds #872007

    Be proud! (not proud that you have an OTD brother) Proud you are frum. Proud that you know what is right.

    Proud that you have a brother although OTD he is still alive– Your brother probably does not need a refuah (unless he has a mental issue)

    If someone bothers you about your brother, reply by asking in a serious way, if they know of any way that they can help him. Maybe they know a Rov, a school or better a good job for him with a frum employer. You will see how fast they will back off.

    Good Luck and stay strong (unfortunately there are too many people in your boat 🙁 )

    in reply to: Joining Hatzalah #873016

    try to get it– After all you want to help another– if you dont get in, you tried and did you hishtadlus, and you will get ??? for all the calls you could have responded to.

    (That is if YOU want to get into hatzalah for the right reasons! not just to be part of the members only exclusive club!)

    in reply to: Gemara Ringing?!? #871592

    You made my day!

    Technology in some ways have made learning so much easier. I too have a gemara on my phone– I can learn where ever i am.

    When i go to a mall with my wife, i dont have to tag along a safer, i can take out my phone, learn a daf, or learn some halacha– without anyone thinking I’m nuts (after all it is perfectly normal to read the news on the phone the whole day).

    It is only when I am at home, and my kids see me learning- i use a regular gemorah– as it is hard for them to know the difference!

    This is what technology was made for!

    in reply to: Mesira #865418

    check out Yeshuran:

    you can download it here:

    starting on page 634,

    which has most of the halacha sources with regards to Mesira, when it is mutar, when assur etc..

    in reply to: Friday in Geulah #866024

    i was in geula- i learnt in yeshiva there. it was uncomfortable being there with tons of girls– but why is it different then going to Yesh, or shefa shuk? (the equivalent to shoprite in the US?)

    the girls and boys are not talking, they are not swiping.

    you can say for that matter never to go on a bus or to get change from a cashier.

    Negiah does happen occasionally, but not intended. for the most part it happens when it isnt realized, and it can be avoided.

    there are many issues that have to be raised, this is not one of them.

    There maybe another reason not to go to geula on friday, that there are so many guys and girls in the ‘right age’ and if they see each other too much, they may become friends.. but not for touching…

    i hated to go to geula on fridays, but i hated to go to a grocery store also–

    the more people make issues out of something– the bigger the issue becomes..

    (and btw it was nice to get fresh candy/or a cake from brooklyn bakery from the sem girls came for shabbos (no guys usually dont bring gifts.. dont know why- as they eat more.. but they dont)

    ok enough of my rambling


    for the record, the author was divorced a few times.

    What i took from the book was that when my wife says somethings wrong, dont try to ‘fix it’ she wants me to listen and feel bad… and then when i have an issue- she says how she feels bad– and i say i dont care- all i want is to fix it.

    in reply to: How Much Below the Knee Should a Skirt be? #1059810

    it depends if you want to get attention for yourself– if you dont mind getting attention then shorter… if you are annoyed when guys look at you– then have it fully covering your knees and a bit longer…

    in reply to: Going To / Coming Home From Motzei Shabbos Maariv #862461

    Either say “A Guten” – like we say starting Mincha time (because Moshe rabinu was niftar then)

    or simply say Gut voch– the words itself are not a mavdil– it is just like saying Gut Shabbos or Ereve shabbos when walking to shul…

    It never hurts to greet someone 🙂

    in reply to: Segula from R' Fisher for breech babies #860641

    in the ??? ???? ???? it says:

    ???? ?????? ????:

    ?? ???? ????? ???? ?????? ????, ???? ??? ?????? ?????? ????, ?????”? ??? ???? ????? (?????? ??? ?????? ????? ????? ?? ????? ???? ???? ??????, ??? ?????? ???????)


    .?? ??? ??? ????? ???? ?? ????,

    ???? ??????? ??? ?????? ?????? ?? ??? ????? ???? ???? ??????!

    Hatzlacha- and let us know what happens!!

    ?????? ?????!

    in reply to: Segula from R' Fisher for breech babies #860638

    I heard to play music from the floor and the baby turns to hear it. 🙂

    in reply to: Dating A Gerrer Guy #861466

    the minhagim of Ger are restrictive in a certain way for non-gerrers, however most gerrers in the US do not follow in those ways, and many in EY dont either.

    chances are, if he is a good bochur, he probably does not even know of these chumras- it will depend where he learns his halachos, what he will hold.

    Be happy for the couple. Gerers have no less shalom bayis with thein HanHagos.

    To think of it, The Yeshivish people have more hanhgas then balay Batim, such as day 31, Or Ohr Zerua, should you tell them? this is the fact of life. The Yeshivish are just as happily married then the bali batim, or the MO that have less halachals!

    in reply to: CMV: Any suggestions? #830482

    be careful and stay away from pregnant women, it is very dangerous for them, and can cause C”V very serious child defects.

    otherwise sleep, and rest, its similar to Mono.

    in reply to: Calling shomrim/police on a father #825652

    is this something pressing that must be reported right away? such as violence? then report it to shomrim/police as it make be classified as pikuach nefesh?

    is it that you dont like him, and you think he stole from you then go to a rov, discuss your situation, and the rov will probably call him in, and give him a warning that he needs therapy and if he fails he will be reported.

    WHen you as a rav, be wary, some rabonim will not let you report anything. Depending on the crime such as molesting, there are prominent rabonim, that will let you go straight to the police, as our Torah system, does not have a system that enables us to deal with it correctly in today’s day and age. We can give warnings but it does not help.

    Similar to a battered woman, she knows she was beaten up so why stay with this guy?? because he says he loves her, and then buys flowers.. and then makes her feel she has no one else in the world but him….

    Well molesters and criminals do that to rabonim, they say we did nothing wrong… we actually did them a favor, we watched the kid.. we were making sure the jewelry does not get taken by someone else, and they are full of excuses…..

    in reply to: Nasi Project has a new approach, I hear. Is this a nasty rumor? #823961

    I give full credit to MP for starting this project– and wish him much success!

    However i have all the issues that everyone else has.

    We are all convincing the shadchonim to deal with the ‘older girls’

    What about the ‘older guys’??

    Maybe give an incentive to them?

    Maybe there should be a pool of money to let the 26+ guys date from?

    As a guy who dated a lot (BH now married) it costs a lot to date, and to just go on another date with a girl that has not that much on paper, why should i do it? from Lakewood to NY is over $100 easy with gas tolls and a rental car.

    Maybe this will be an incentive for the guys to listen to these older girls..

    and then there is an issue when a shadchan is pressured into making a shidduch ($$$$) and the more money that is there (more pressure) will make the guys go out, brainwash them that this is the right girl ($$$), the shadchan gets his/her $ and then who will deal with their sholam Bayis for the next few years????

    I dont mean to knock the idea, i just think it needs a little more structuring.

    Maybe the $$ should go to a tzedaka that the shadchan chooses?? (not to cover tution or some other expense.)

    this is my 2 cents!!

    But again credit is due to MP, he wants to make it work! and we should too, lets all try to figure out a way that all the guys and girls get married!!! soon!!!

Viewing 20 posts - 1 through 20 (of 20 total)