Lilmod Ulelamaid

“the Remah finding limud zechus for yayin nesech which yidden werent practicing”

Apparently, they were Frum or he wouldn’t have bothered finding a limud zechus for them, and he wouldn’t have been able to find one either.

Geordie – I guess he meant that those three places (NY, Monsey, and Lakewood) are the three finishers in the competition. Although I thought Monsey was part of NY, and Lakewood is a safek.

It’s good you warned me not to jump on you…. I probably would have if you hadn’t warned me 🙂

All Americans are illegal immigrants besides the Indians.

They were Frum then, so they didn’t go on dates. 🙂

And the girls never left the house: 1. it’s not tznius & 2. Why should they leave the house? Everything they need to do is in the house – the dishes, and cleaning, and laundry, etc.

Say that you heard about them from someone. If they ask you “From who?”, tell them that you’d rather not say.

LB: “Just came to say that even saying that it is a reaction doesn’t have to come with a judgement.”

LB, you wrote this in your OP:

“Charedi was really a response to the Haskalah and unrelated to some “true” Judaism.”

Sure sounds like a judgment to me.

Was the Rabbi trying to deligitimize “Chareidiism”? That is how it sounded from your OP.

None of us here heard the shiur, so we don’t know if that was really his point, and it is possible that you quoted him out of context. All we know is what you wrote. From what you wrote, it sounds like a deligitimization of Chareidiism, and that is what everyone is reacting to.

What’s Trifecta?

“Joseph, there is also Chareidi Leumi (Chardal).”

Which is the proof that anyone who is Torahdik is Chareidi even if they are also tzioni.

I think that your Rabbi may have been talking about the fact that it’s possible that the Frum world may have started having very strong opinions about certain things in reaction to the haskala. I don’t know if that is a fact, but I would imagine that may have happened. For example, in EY today, the Chareidi world tends to be more hesitant than the Chareidi world in the US is about having secular studies. This is probably due at least in part to concern about secular-zionist influence.

But being against too much secular studies out of concern of outside influence is NOT the definition of Chareidi.

The definition of Chareidi might be: Those Jews who wish to make sure that their Torah hashkafa remains untainted.

How that is expressed may vary in each generation based on what is happening in that generation (haskala, zionism, etc).

But the definition of Chareidi Judaism and the essence of what a Chareidi Jew is have not changed – it is merely being expressed differently.

It is like saying that saying that there are no Frum Jews today because Frum Jews used to ride on horses and today they don’t.

Maybe people’s heads have gotten bigger.

LB – whether or not what your Rabbi is saying is true would depend on how he is defining Chareidism. It is probably quite possible to define Chareidiism in such a way that what he is saying is true.

For example, if he were to take a specific aspect that is commonly found in the Chareidi world and to say that that defines Charediism, then he might be right. But the question is: is that the most accurate or apprpriate way to define Chareidim? I agree with Joseph that today the term is basically used merely as default Torah Judaism.

I remember once many years ago when my friend’s Israeli Chareidi husband wanted to set me up with a cousin of his from B’nei Brak and I was concerned about the fact that he was Chareidi (which I thought meant some specific brand of Judaism). He was like, “why? Do you watch tv?”

I had similar reactions time and time again whenever such conversations too place.

LB – do you know what I’m talking about (the Sephardi equivalent of chulent)?

To answer your question, personally I would be more concerned about halacha. As far as I understand, according to halacha, you should be fine as long as you have something hot. You can be yotzei with a cup of tea or coffee.

I’m not sure if it’s an absolute halacha that you HAVE to have something hot altogether. I have heard different things, and never looked into it.

But it is certainly a strong inyan if it’s not an absolute halacha. (and it may even be halacha).

Joseph, I’m assuming that she means single adults, since her son lives with her. And yeah, singles are expelled from most communities….

j/k – they are not expelled, but they either are nonexistent, or they move out (usually to NY), or they lay low.

There are few communities with single adults. It’s also not such a good idea for a single to move too far from the NY area if he’s dating. Unless possibly if they find another area that has a lot of singles. But even then, it’s probably not such a good idea in general, since you really are limiting yourself.

The only place I can think of in the US outside of NY that might have a lot of singles is Baltimore. I don’t know what the weather is like there, but I would imagine that it’s not so different from New York.

Litvos + 1 quintillion!

She said she wants a place where there’s a community for her young-adult-son. I would think that VA, GA, & SC would probably be really bad ideas for him.

Florida might be a bit better, but I imagine it’s also pretty bad, although I could be wrong, since I don’t really know what it’s like there.

What about LA? I don’t know much about the community there, but I would imagine there are some young adults there.

I still think Israel is your best bet. The weather is great, and there are plenty of young adults here (well at least compared to Virginia and Atlanta, I think).

DaasYochid: “So, to sum up Thinking out loud’s post, a bungalow colony is a third world country.”

There we go!

You already thanked me Golfer, so you’re already yotzei, and you don’t have to thank me again.

And I’m just warning you that if you do, you might find a new thread asking what to do about two annoying posters who keep repeating themselves over and over and over and over and over….

Don’t say I didn’t warn you…

I let.

They won’t let, but why did you make that comment? (I can read several things into that; not sure which one is correct).

DaasYochid: “So, to sum up Thinking out loud’s post, a bungalow colony is a third world country.”

There you go Golfer – does that do the trick?

ZD – good idea. Actually any place in Eretz Yisrael is relatively warm in the winter. And there are a lot of other places in EY that would probably be better socially than Arad.

It’s been pretty warm where I live. I didn’t even need a coat for most of last week.

And if you move to E”Y, you also have the merit of living in Israel. And if you’re moving already, why not just move here?

LB – thank you – I listened to part of it, but he didn’t give a source as far as I could tell, so it didn’t really help me.

I listened to a couple of other shiurim meanwhile of the topic but they also didn’t bring sources for this.

I did find a place online where it discussed it, and brought sources, but I am not familiar with any of these sources, and had trouble finding them on hebrewbooks. There were sefarim with some of the same names, but I wasn’t sure if they were the right sefarim, and I couldn’t find the place quoted.

If you’re around, DY, and can help me, that would be great. You’re always very good at finding things on hebrewbooks.

The sources were: ????? ????? 72/2, ??? ?????? ??? ?,

vol 2, 8417 ??”? ?? ????

(assuming I copied them down right).

ZD -thank you, it could be that there are Sephardim who eat chulent, but I was talking about something else.

I once met 2 Masorati Israelis in a store in Lakewood who were really excited because they found the food they were looking for. I had never heard of it before (and I can’t remember what it’s called), so they explained to me that it’s a food that is kept hot over Shabbos just like chulent is.

I was very impressed that they were that religious that they kept hilchos bishul even though they weren’t so Frum in other ways. But I don’t remember what the food was called.

According to the Mishna Berurah (siman 2, s”k 2), you are not supposed to put on 2 articles of clothing at once, since it’s “kashe l’shikcha”.

I think I may have seen or heard somewhere that this does not apply to women, but I don’t remember where. Does anyone know if this is correct, and if so what the source is?

DY or Iacisrmma – are either of you around? Or does anyone else know?

Thanks!

Mazel Tov!!!!

Sorry, I don’t know much about the topic, but I wanted to take the opportunity to wish you Mazel Tov!

I would think that the best thing would be to do what you’re comfortable with, since there probably are no real traditions involved, so you can create your own (obviously after checking with a Rav to make sure your plans are not against the Torah in any way).

It’s good that you are trying to find out what others do, but if you don’t find out anything or aren’t comfortable with what you hear others did, then you should feel free to do what you’re comfortable with.

I do remember one Russian couple I knew when I was young who had a second wedding. I did not attend, but my impression was that it was small. If I have a chance, maybe I’ll ask my mother if she remembers.

In any case, hatzlacha and mazel tov! 🙂