Lilmod Ulelamaid

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  • in reply to: The Frierdiker Rebbe #1216838
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “Baal Hatanya V’Shulchan Aruch”

    Do you mean: “Baal Hatanya v’Shulchan Aruch HaRav”?

    in reply to: Parshas Hamon this Tuesday #1214972
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    There is an article by Rav Yair Hoffman on the main site about Parshas Haman. He discusses it in general, and then he writes about the minhag of saying it today. I have copied and pasted that part. TLIK, I know you wrote that you don’t consider “I saw it online” as a valid source, BUT he does bring sources that anyone who wants to can look up. And he also explains why it is not possible to find the main source.

    THE TUESDAY OF BESHALACH MINHAG

    A CAVEAT FOR EVERYONE

    – See more at: http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/522899/parshas-hamahn-and-hishtadlus.html#sthash.4X21NCgf.dpuf

    in reply to: meeting the shadchan #1215353
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    WTP +1. Very good points!

    in reply to: Words Not to Say to a Rabbi in Shul #1214786
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Geordie +1

    LB +1 (for +1ing Geordie)

    in reply to: Saying Tehillim after Sunset #1215708
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I think that most Rabbanim say it’s okay nowadays.

    in reply to: THE BROKEN TELEPHONE GAME!!! #1227975
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    yoga

    treif (j/k)

    kosher

    food

    like

    love

    treif (j/k)

    in reply to: THE BROKEN TELEPHONE GAME!!! #1227974
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “Bar

    Jerusalem

    Birthday

    Trees”

    What? How does bracha go to bar, and bar go to Jerusalem, and Jerusalem to birthday, and birthday to trees?

    in reply to: WH releases list of terror since 2014 #1214775
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Is it a listing of all terror attacks worldwide, only those in the US, or only those targeting American citizens?

    in reply to: Parshas Hamon this Tuesday #1214971
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    The day has arrived! Remember to say Parshas HaMan today!!!!

    Whether or not there is a source about the Tuesday of Parshas Beshalach, it is always good to say it. The Shulchan Aruch says that you should say it every day anyhow, so at least we should try for once a year.

    And there may very well be a source for saying it today.

    in reply to: 2 questions for the CR community #1224514
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I’m dying of curiousity to know who this seminary teacher is and if she is a friend of mine. I’m also curious to know if she quoted me and if she disagreed with me.

    I do have a lot of friends who disagree with me and think I’m an apikorus. I remember once when I was teaching in a certain seminary, and one of my students was really confused because she kept going back and forth between me and another teacher (who was a friend of mine) who kept telling her that what I taught the class was wrong, so I would reexplain to her why I was right until she understood it, but then she would go back to this teacher who would tell her that what I said was kefira (okay, I’m exagerrating – she didn’t actually say it was kefira).

    It would be really funny if I know the person you are talking about and if she quoted me, and if she is someone who also disagrees with me IRL.

    in reply to: 2 questions for the CR community #1224513
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    On the one hand, as DY pointed out, we don’t know exactly what she said, so I can’t comment on her specific comments.

    However, I do think that she is right for pointing out the problems inherent with the CR as well as most “Frum” newspapers, magazines, and websites.

    I do think that there are a lot of negative aspects to the CR, and as your seminary teacher she has an obligation to point these out to you.

    I don’t think that the CR is the ideal place for a person to be whether it’s for halachic discussions or socialization or whatever. However, we don’t live in an ideal world, and for many people, this may be the best alternative for them for right now. I do think that for me, it has been a lifesaver in certain ways, and I think that is true for some of the other posters as well (perhaps in the same ways; perhaps in others).

    In terms of halachic questions, this is not the best place for them. However, I think that most of the people who ask halachic questions here are doing so because they don’t necessarily have a better option. I have mentioned in the past that although at times, I will mention that the person asking the sheilah should really ask a Rav, at the same time, I am sometimes hesitant to say that since the person asking probably does NOT have a qualified Rav to ask.

    Also, I am afraid that the Rav they choose may be problematic. There are many people around with the title Rav and the fact that someone has that title does not necessarily make them qualified to ask sheilahs too. So if I know that I know the answer to the question, I do think it makes sense for me to answer it.

    I do hope that most people realize that they can’t just trust anyone. And I hope that anyone who has the resources to do so doesn’t just rely on any “psakim” from the CR, and just uses it as a resource to be aware of potential halachic issues and solutions and sources. But the truth is, the idea of “not just trusting anyone” also applies to people IRL even if they bear the title Rabbi and have real names.

    Unfortunately, nowadays, this is a tremendous problem – there are many “Rabbanim” and “poskim” (as well as “Rabbits” and “poskot”) who have a lot of hashkafic problems and are running around giving incorrect piskei halacha. Honestly, the average CR poster who answers halachic question may very well be more qualified than many of the “Rabbis” I hear quoted in real life.

    Bottom Line: The CR is not the ideal place in general and certainly not for piskei halacha. Most people who are here are probably here because it is the best choice for them right now. As your seminary teacher, she has an obligation to guide you to the best places and steer you away from any that are less than ideal. Right now, while you are in seminary, you do have the best resources (in all areas- social, halacha, hashkafa, etc.) at your fingertips, so you probably should not need the CR.

    in reply to: CR in Country Yossi Magazine #1214823
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I haven’t read the telemarketers thread, but I just want to say as a former telemarketer, I think people should try to be nice to telemarketers. Some people have this mistaken idea that you are allowed to be rude to telemarketers and hang up on them.

    Telemarketers are real people trying to earn an honest parnassah and you should be as nice to them as you are to others!

    Disclaimer: most people I called were really nice. I am just writing this as a reaction to the above thread that I did not read that I suspect may have had posts encouraging people to be rude to telemarketers and as a reaction to the small minority of people who were rude.

    in reply to: CR in Country Yossi Magazine #1214822
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Has CY quoted CR lately? I don’t read it, so I wouldn’t know. Is it even still around? Have they ever quoted me?

    in reply to: Guy who knows everything here; ask me anything #1215242
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “Are bald women different than bald men in this regard, that you asked specifically about men?”

    It’s way more common for men to be bald than women. The only bald women I know are bald because they shave their hair.

    in reply to: Guy who knows everything here; ask me anything #1215241
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    What about a married woman who doesn’t shave her head but does cover it? How do they know what her hair color is?

    And what about women who dye their hair? Or what happens if your hair turns grey after you get your license? Or gets darker and goes from dirty blond to light brown?

    I never realized this question was so confusing!

    At least eye color doesn’t usually change by the time you are old enough for a driver’s license. My eyes actually changed color – but I was around 5 or 6, so I was too young for a license yet.

    in reply to: problems with not jewish college and this is why you should go to touro #1215019
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Health – +1 Shkoyach for not being afraid to make a Kiddush Hashem!

    Although I do understand why others are. I would probably be like Mik5. It’s not easy to stand up for our beliefs – but it is definitely commendable when one can do it!

    in reply to: meeting the shadchan #1215351
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I have met many shadchanim who did not set me up. My case might be different since I am an “older single” so they are less likely to know people for me.

    However, I also knew a 19-year-old girl from Lakewood who was a good girl but not a “typical Lakewood girl”, and when she met shadchanim in Lakewood, they told her that she needs an “out-of-towner” and they don’t have anyone from her. So she went on SYAS and met her chosson right away.

    I would say that there really is no way to know, because it depends if they have anyone who seems right for you.

    Also, many shadchanim (especially Lakewood ones) have tons of people calling and emailing them every day, so they can’t possibly set everyone up. I just saw an OORAH video with a shadchan panel. One of the shadchanim mentioned the number of emails he gets a day. I forget the number, but it was HUGE! somewhere in the hundreds, I believe.

    So there is no way he could possibly be setting up all of those people!

    So when you go to meet a shadchan, you should go in with the mindset that you are doing this to be yotzei your hishtadlus, but you are not necessarily expecting that he/she will actually set you up. That way you will be less disappointed.

    I think it would also be a good idea to set up 3 or 4 appointments for the same day. That way there is a greater chance that at least one of them will have someone for you.

    I also think that since you are probably not a “typical Lakewood girl”, you should meet with non-Lakewood shadchanim as well. Maybe try one or two in NY and try some out-of-town shadchanim as well. A Baltimore shadchan could be a good idea for you.

    Hatzlacha!

    in reply to: High school diplomas #1214901
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    lol – had to go back and reread my post to figure out what everyone was talking about.

    I meant to write: “my friend’s teenage daughter”.

    Aside from the fact that I don’t have any kids, I am not really old enough to have a teenage grandaughter! (at least not as an American. I suppose if I were from Taiman or Ethiopia, it might be possible).

    Anyhow, it’s nice to know that there are actually people who read my long posts! I’ve always wondered about that.

    in reply to: My name was in today's Haftarah #1215294
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Oh, is your name Puah? Never would have guessed – quite original.

    I guess Miriam is more likely, or Shifra or Tzipora. I was going to say Yocheved but I checked, and her name does not seem to appear.

    Anyhow – that’s cool – we have something in common, since my middle name is also in Parshas Shemos (or at least a word with the same shoresh).

    Glad to hear from you, HGG! It’s been a while. How have you been? Getting ready for the chasuna, IY”H?

    in reply to: How to stick out school? #1216150
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Iacisrmma – I’m beginning to see your point…

    j/j I still wouldn’t discourage her from posting if she really feels the need to. It has its drawbacks but is still far better than most other places she could be.

    in reply to: Now what happened to Lilmod? #1214955
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    There were lots of times when people thought I was a guy (sorry, I don’t use the word “man” for singles – see the thread about that :))

    in reply to: How to stick out school? #1216145
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Iacisrmma – I didn’t; her mother did, and I don’t know if she has actually met with her yet. My feeling is that if she is posting, she obviously must feel a need to post. She has mentioned that her social life is not great, and she probably feels a need to vent.

    If she feels a need to post, I don’t think she should be discouraged from doing so. Additionally, if she is online, this is probably one of the safer places for her to be, so it is probably good that she is here.

    I do agree though that people should exercise great caution in terms of their responses. This is true whomever you are posting to, but some situations require more caution than others. You really don’t know the damage you can cause, especially when posting to someone so much younger than you. All teenagers are very vulnerable, and some much more than others. This sounds like a particularly sensitive situation.

    The main thing needed is sympathy and encouragement,imho.

    in reply to: How would your life have changed? #1214937
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I’m not strong – I just don’t really have taavos for anything that’s not edible or readable, so it’s hard to see how it would affect my life that much (for the bad), other than filling my kitchen and my bookshelves.

    It’s true that I can’t know until I have the money, but I am who I am, and it’s hard to imagine that that would change very much.

    in reply to: How would your life have changed? #1214935
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    The only “unnecesary” thing I have any taaveh for is a life-time supply of chocolate and that wouldn’t really make me not fit in with my friends. I would probably use a good part of it to buy things for my friends to pay them back for things they’ve done for me. And the rest of it I would probably lend to gemachim.

    in reply to: How would your life have changed? #1214933
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I don’t know about that – it’s not like it would last forever. I would use it to pay off debts, buy an apartment in Eretz Yisroel, pay for tickets to go to the US a few times a year for shidduchim, buy a new wardrobe, give maaser of course or maybe chomesh, and put the rest in the bank to live on and support my future family IYH, if anything is even left at that point.

    in reply to: Why say "ladies and gentlemen"? #1214639
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    If someone would call out to me, “hey girl”, I think I would find that rude. In Israel, they would probably say, “giveret” in such a case, even though ordinarily I would be a “bachura”. In the US, I would think they would either say “miss” or “slicha” or “excuse me” if they were trying to get my attention.

    in reply to: How would your life have changed? #1214931
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I heard it from a friend. I think it was at least 7 years ago from this coming Pesach. It was almost definitely at least five and a half years ago.

    If his book was written before that, then that might be where she got it from.

    Alternatively (more likely possibility), it’s an old joke.

    in reply to: Frum Peppers #1215337
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Are you talking about regular green peppers or about something else? (not sure what a bell pepper is)

    in reply to: Jewish Music Sometimes Rubs Me the Wrong Way #1216775
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I guess they saw that: a) it was a lost cause & b) there are so many more important issues to deal with

    in reply to: My name was in today's Haftarah #1215290
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “I think you’re just misremembering. The space was always there”

    What is this – you’re trying to play around with my mind?

    Sorry, but you can’t fool me. At the time I wrote the post below, the space was not there. That’s why I wrote that post.

    http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/my-name-was-in-todays-haftarah#post-645901

    in reply to: Why say "ladies and gentlemen"? #1214637
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “only if it’s done one way and not the other, but I find that usually people who do one, do the other.”

    “What does that mean?”

    I mean that single males are also called boys. If they are not, then it’s condescending to call single females “girls”.

    “And are you suggesting that married women not be referred to as girls? (As married men are not called a bochor.)”

    As far as I know, married female are generally not called girls. Except by their single friends who are the same age as them. Like I might call my friends girls since I’m a girl and I’m the same age as them.

    “The reason I find it highly problematic for males to call adult females as girls, is that the underlying reason it is used is as as a form of endearment.”

    I got that. I just personally have not heard it used that way. Obviously if you know people who use it that way, then it’s a problem. But if people also refer to adult single males as boys, then I would think that’s a proof that they are not using it the way you say.

    I also don’t really see how it could be used that way, since it’s usually used in third person. You don’t call a person a “girl” or “lady” or “boy” etc to their face; it’s how you refer to them.

    in reply to: Frum Peppers #1215334
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    green peppers become red peppers? What?

    in reply to: Jewish Music Sometimes Rubs Me the Wrong Way #1216771
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    It depends on the words also. In general, one has to be careful with Pesukim, but Kaddish and Shema are more problematic if the tunes aren’t appropriate, imho (Shema is not my opinion – it’s brought down somewhere, but I haven’t specifically seen anything about Kaddish – it just seems obvious).

    The main question is – does the song (combination of words and tune) bring you closer to Hashem? Does the tune help you to internalize the meaning of the words? Different people will have different answers for different songs. It also depends on sensitivity levels.

    Personally, I’m not as sensitive as some are, but I’m more sensitive than others. I like music that is somewhat modern and rocky – it makes me happy and gives me energy- but I don’t like it when it is too much so and especially, if it doesn’t fit the words.

    I feel like sometimes people just throw together tunes and words that have nothing to do with each other.

    in reply to: My name was in today's Haftarah #1215288
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I thought that Ben Tzion could be written like this. And Bat Tzion too. And the last name “Ben Moshe”.

    I have a capital U, but I consider it to be one name.

    Why do the mods keep playing around with your name? Whose idea was it to take out the subtitle – yours or theirs?

    And why should you be entitled to a last name? No one else has one.

    I think you’re just misremembering. The space was always there.

    in reply to: Why say "ladies and gentlemen"? #1214634
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “Seventy year old bochorim are called to the Torah as a bochor.”

    Which is the same as saying “boy”, so why do you have a problem with girls being called girls?

    in reply to: Why say "ladies and gentlemen"? #1214633
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    “Like it’s cute to be called a girl instead of a woman (or even lady).”

    That sounds extremely condescending (if it’s done that way).

    “Which is why I find it highly problematic for males to call adult females as girls.”

    only if it’s done one way and not the other, but I find that usually people who do one, do the other.

    in reply to: How to stick out school? #1216143
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Iacisrmma – you are right in theory, but it does sound like she has tried. It can be difficult to know how to go about these things the right way. I am hoping that the social worker will be able to help her to figure out the right way to go about that. If she is a good social worker, she should be able to do that.

    in reply to: Why say "ladies and gentlemen"? #1214630
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    If they’re single, they are called boys the same way that single females are called girls. They can also be “guys”, but not men. I don’t call the guys I go out with men even if they were previously married. That sounds weird to me.

    in reply to: Non-slip Tallis #1219412
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    wow, I never realized that being a boy and wearing a tallis is so complicated! No wonder you have to say “shelo asani isha” every morning to remind yourselves that it’s worth it!

    in reply to: My name was in today's Haftarah #1215286
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I thought DaasYochid was one name. Like Bentzion. If someone’s name is Bentzion, he can’t say that his name is in davening just because the words “ben” and “tzion” are in davening.

    If Daas is your first name, and Yochid is your last name, that’s a different story. But then there should be a space in between.

    btw, didn’t there used to be a space, or was it always like this?

    in reply to: Parshas Hamon this Tuesday #1214966
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Well so far my only source that there is no source is something that I saw on the internet … I think it was in the Coffee Room in a thread entitled “parshas hamon this Tuesday”…

    just joking.. I know you need more of a source to prove something than to disprove it.

    But, it’s always good to say it anyhow, so it certainly doesn’t hurt to say it Tuesday of Parshas B’shalach, especially as long as we have no verification that it’s not true. And at least this way, everyone makes sure to say it at least once a year, since every day is too much for most people.

    in reply to: Frum Peppers #1215332
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Green. Esther Hamalka was green, so apparently it’s the most tznius color, and hence, the most Frum.

    in reply to: THE BROKEN TELEPHONE GAME!!! #1227970
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    worms

    kids playing in dirt

    my niece

    yummy

    chocolate

    shehakol

    bracha

    in reply to: How to stick out school? #1216141
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I’m so sorry you are going through such a hard time. I really hope things get better soon!!!!

    Kol hakavod for sticking it out and going to school each day. I know it’s a big challenge, and you are getting tremendous schar each day that you go. The harder it is, the more amazing you are for sticking with it!!!

    Please let me know how things are going with the social worker. If it really doesn’t work out, I will try to see if I can figure something else out, but I’m not sure what I can do over an anonymous website, so I really hope it works out! Keep us posted.

    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    DY: “BTW, leitzanusa d’avodah zarah is muttar, so I think what you posted is okay, since you painted it in a negative light.”

    I think that’s the difference between pritzus and kefira. If it’s obvious that you don’t agree with the kefira, it might make it okay, but that won’t help for pritzus.

    in reply to: Words Not to Say to a Rabbi in Shul #1214782
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I agree with Meno. I don’t think “Thank you” is a problem.

    in reply to: My name was in today's Haftarah #1215284
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I was talking about my user name. I don’t think your user name is in davening.

    Actually, my real name is also in davening, but that’s not what I was talking about.

    Even my subtitle is in davening. Yours isn’t anywhere. Which is too bad, because I liked it. It was a lot better than mine.

    in reply to: My name was in today's Haftarah #1215282
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    My name was in today’s davening…. and yesterday’s… and the day before.

    Now how many of you can say that?

    in reply to: Parshas Hamon this Tuesday #1214965
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Meno – lol.

    in reply to: Guy who knows everything here; ask me anything #1215235
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    I could ask my brother – then I’ll know for sure.

Viewing 50 posts - 3,001 through 3,050 (of 7,986 total)