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That part is a problem halachically.
I know a Giyores who was specifically told by the Rabbanim who converted her that she had to move from Manhattan to Brooklyn first and live there for a certain amount of time so that she could be exposed to mainstream Orthodoxy before she converted.
While WTP may be right that you should choose your community carefully once you convert, you should also choose your community carefully before you convert, and the considerations may be different.
After you convert, you may want to look for a community that is more accepting and open. Before you convert, your emphasis should be on exposure to the mainstream Orthodox community. Even if it is a bit more right-wing than you may choose to become once you convert, it might be good to have some exposure to it now.
Of course, those two “types” of communities (openminded & accepting vs.mainstream) could coincide in any case.
It sounds like you may not have a choice right now anyhow, but it would probably be a good idea to visit other communities for Shabbos, etc. in order to get a broader picture of the Orthodox world (which is confusing enough even for those who were born into it!).
Hatzlacha! It’s a big step to take, and kol hakavod for choosing it. I hope you find a wonderful community to grow and learn in.
I’ve read a lot of old posts. I’ve read a lot of PBA’s and I think he’s very funny too. Close call. You’re right though – the current ones stick in my head more, so maybe I’m not objective.
Zeeskite’s, I haven’t read so much of, and I don’t remember his posts, so I have no opinion.
But hey listen, if you don’t want the compliment, I can take it back.
“That wasn’t one of the choices.”
yeah, well, in the multiple choice tests in school, I sometimes had that problem as well – often, the correct choice wasn’t listed.
LF = ZK
Daas Yachid.
LB, that was Joseph’s point. But as other posters pointed out, and I think I agree, that is not necessarily the point. It would be one small section of the plane for those people who need to sleep or work and are easily distracted. It doesn’t hurt the family or children in any way.
What could be a problem is if it becomes so common for people to choose that section of the plane and it leads to discrimination against children and people start to really look negatively at people flying with kids.
But as long as it is kept to one small section of the plane, it shouldn’t be a big problem. And I think that section should cost significantly more in order to avoid those problems. This way, people will realize that the norm is that people fly with kids.
LB – the term could probably be used either way. It would depend on the context of the statement/discusion.
However, it usually means that both (or all) opinions are legitimate, especially if it’s a halachic issue. If someone asks, “what is the halacha regarding…”, and the response is that it’s a machlokes, that would generally mean that both (or all) opinions are legitimate.
An exception might be if the person says that it’s a machlokes if it’s a or b but it was decided that the halacha is b.
I believe that the mezuza issue that you quoted falls in this last category. It was a machlokes, but a decision was made, and according to halacha, we now have to follow that decision (at least I think so – I don’t know enough about the halachos of Mezuza to say for sure.)
If you are talking about a machlokes Rishonim, you would have to find out what the Achronim and contemporary Poskim say. You can’t just decide to follow a particular Rishon. The same goes with a machlokes Tanaim or Amoraim.
If the machlokes is amongst contemporary Poskim, there is some room to say that you might be okay whoever you follow, but it is not so simple.
First, you have to verify that the Poskim you are talking about are all accepted legitimate Poskim. Then, if you are Ashkenazi, you have to make sure that they are Ashkenazi and if you are Sephardi, you have to make sure that they are Sephardi.
Aside from that, it can be problematic to go by one Posek for one thing and another Posek for another thing. For one thing, there may be an inherent contradiction between the two psaks, and that is something that you wouldn’t even necessarily know. However, it is less likely for this to happen if the two psakim are in different areas of halacha (for example, one has to do with hilchos brachos and one has to do with hilchos Shabbos).
The other problem is that you’re not supposed to always be looking for the easiest opinion to follow, and to each time choose which opinion to follow based on the fact that it’s easiest. It’s not a particularly intellectually honest or Yarei Shamayimdik approach as a general rule.
On the other hand, as someone who is in the process of becoming Frum, there could be much more room to say that it is okay to do something as long as there is some legitimate opinion. Especially in an area that is difficult for you. You certainly should not be looking to make things harder for yourself than necessary.
As a general rule, the best thing to do is to have one Rav and always go by him. But that is not realistic for everyone (especially for women) and I’m not sure that you are even in a position at this point to be able to figure out who you should be choosing as a Rav. And the danger exists that you may choose someone whom you shouldn’t be choosing.
So, probably what you should do when it comes to basic halacha is to read through the mainstream english books that have been written on specific topics. You should probably choose one book for each topic. Try to make sure it’s a mainstream sefer (neither too left-wing nor too right-wing) and that it is well researched and well written.
For Hilchos Brachos, I would recommend Rabbi Bodner’s sefer. For Hilchos Shabbos, I would recommend either Shmiras Shabbos k’hilchasa, Rabbi Ribiat’s sefer or Rav Eider’s sefer.
Rav Eider’s sefer is very well-written, but the downside is that I don’t think he ever wrote/published all of the melachos. Also, he presents a wide range of opinions which may confuse you. I never read Rabbi Ribiat’s sefer but it looks very thorough. It might be too thorough for you though – it is a lot of volumes and it would take a long time to go through it.
So Shemiras Shabbos k’hilchasa might be the best option for you. It will give you the basic practical halachos according to a mainstream poseik.
There also may be online or telephone shiurim you can listen to, but I’m not sure what’s out there. And of course, there may be shiurim in your neighborhood, which it sounds like is something you do a lot of.
RY & DY – I just saw the thread you are referring to. I hadn’t know what you were talking about.
I guess FuturePotus just thinks you two and Joseph are the type to have conspiracies.
My mother’s not-Jewish German professor was arrested by the Nazis for being a pacifist. First they asked me if he’s Jewish. He said, “no”.
Then they asked him if he’s a pacifist. He asked, “How do you define pacifism?” They said, “That proves you’re Jewish. Only a Jew answers a question with a question.
He escaped Germany right away.
True story. I did not make this up.
YYTZ: “A 2014-15 poll by Pew found that 98% of Charedim agreed that any Jew in the world should be able to make aliyah and become a citizen.”
That has nothing to do with the issue at hand.
“97% of Charedim said that Israel should give preferential treatment to Jews.”
Definitely has nothing to do with the issue at hand.
” 86% of Charedim believed halacha should be law in Israel”
That REALLY has nothing do do with the issue at hand. The reason we don’t recognize the state is precisely because halacha is not the law in Israel.
“59% believe all Arabs should be expelled.”
Definitely has nothing to do with anything.
“65% of Charedim said that the existence of Israel was necessary for the long-term survival of the Jewish people”
They may be referring to now, after the fact of the creation of the State of Israel. Now that there is a State of Israel, it would not be good for us if Hamas took over. That does not mean that things wouldn’t have been better if it hadn’t been created in the first place.
“All these suggest Charedim are happy Israel exists.”
You have to differentiate between the Land of Israel and the State of Israel. Two commpletely different things. When Chareidim refer to Israel, they are usually referring to the place, not to the government.
Also, as DY pointed out, we have to differentiate between our cheshbonos and Hashem’s cheshbonos. At the end of the day, everything that happens is from Hashem. Hashem is the one who enabled and allowed the creation of the State of Israel. We don’t know why. Everything is ultimately for our good (although we can say the same about the holocaust, etc. as well, yet it would be terrible for someone to say he is happy the holocaust happened).
Our cheshbonos are that it was assur for the State of Israel to be created the way it was (at least according to most Gedolim) and that the State of Israel caused many to stop keeping Torah and Mitzvos. We can’t be happy about that no matter how many postitive things seem to have come out of the State.
At the same time, now that the State exists, we can’t ignore it even if we don’t think it’s legitimate, although we can and must ignore those laws that go against the Torah. And we certainly don’t want it taken over by Hamas. And we certainly have to stand up for its right to exist when we are dealing with “umos haolam”. Their reasons for denying its right to exist are not the same as ours, and again, today, post-facto, we certainly do not want it to destroyed, since the alternative would be far worst.
One day soon, Im yirtzeh Hashem, we will understand the deeper meaning behind all of this as well as behind everything else that has happened. Meanwhile, we must remember that our Nationhood and identity is based on the Torah and nothing else, while at the same time, on a practical level, we have to deal with the reality of the State of Israel.
Litvos, I love chess. I think it’s my favorite game.
Ditto. I prefer something I can play against the computer since I have no one to play with me.
When I was in elementary school, they administered IQ tests to all the fifth-eighth graders one year. When they gave us back our test results, they also gave back the average for each grade. My grade had the highest average, bli ayin hora.
I once took a bunch of IQ tests online. I wouldn’t have thought they were particularly legitimate, but the scores all came out relatively similar as well as similar to what I remember my score being in elementary school. I thought that was interesting.
LF: “It depends if they’re on strike or not.”
Do you recognize them when they’re on strike or when they are not?
RY – why should it have to do with you??
Reuventree: In response to your question, read my above post. On a practical level, if a police pulls you over, you have to respond and it would be rude and a chilul Hashem not to do so.
On a hashkafic level you may feel that the State of Israel should not have been created and therefore it is not a legitimate entity, but for practical reasons, you have to acknowledge the fact that l’maaseh, they think they have a right to exist and they are controlling the country and making laws.
That is to say, as long as those laws do not come into conflict with the Torah. When they come into conflict with the Torah, the Torahdik Dati Leumi people would also say that those laws are not legitimate.
You should probably see DY’s link above as well since it may help to answer your question.
DY: “He is very anti, but is also a pragmatist.”
That’s two different things then. One has to do with how you relate to the State on a hashkafic level, and the other has to do with how you relate to it on a practical level.
I haven’t read it yet; I am just responding to your comment. But that does fit in with what I understood the mainstream Yeshivish/Chareidi (Agudah) view to be.
too tired now, will try to look tom, b”n, thanks, I had missed that link. I thought I had remembered (from when I read it nearly 30 years ago) that he was very anti, so I’m surprised, but then again it was a while ago.
LF – lol.
Thanks for the info, twisted. I should have phrased that more carefully. I was trying to qualify the statement in case there were other opinions, but I guess I didn’t qualify it enough.
“It exists. We need to deal with it.”
True, but that’s not a stira to not recognizing it. But maybe your point was that it’s academic.
“???? ???? ?????? ??? ??”
what does that mean?
corrupt
richest
question: how are we supposed to remember what words have already been used if we don’t feel like checking each time?
Are you serious? And all these years I thought I was a drug addict!
Actually, I still am because I eat chocolate, and chocolate is definitely a drug!
WTP – how do you know what the mods are thinking? They might think so too; they don’t have a problem with it as long as it’s not simultaneous.
Also, from something they told me once, it sounds like they don’t always know.
LB – the discussion here is about rice cakes, not rice. Rice is mezonos and borei nefashos, at least according to mainstream Ashkenazi non-Chassidish psak.
I don’t know if Sephardim or Chabad hold differently. I have never heard that there anyone holds differently l’maaseh, but I can’t say so for sure.
Geordie – if you are reading this, there had been a comment from LB that had been deleted and my comment was in response to hers. I just wanted to explain because you wrote you were confused, and I thought you might be wondering why I was talking about you and what I meant.
She said something about how what you wrote (about being friends with Ashley and not knowing he was a comedian) was similar to what some people quoted on the website you referred to said, so I wrote (as a joke), “maybe one of them was Geordie”.
Moderators: I hope you allow this post, because I am worried that Geordie might feel bad otherwise. I phrased it very carefully.
Randomex, well it was still nice of you to try to inform the public of the halacha. As long as you quote your source and don’t make it sound like there can’t possibly be another opinion, it’s not a problem to quote a particular opinion.
btw, how did the title get changed? Did the mods decide to that?
unicorn
icicles
Why should I care if the person sitting next to me is Frum or not? I love all types of Jews (well except mean ones).
sweatshirt
sweatpants
gym
exercise
health
exclamation point
Well today we call everyone a lady or a gentleman, so it doesn’t matter.
l’havdil, we also call all men Rabosai in the zimun.
Why, has someone made a new rule that you have to know what you’re talking about when you post in the CR???!!!
cute. did you make that up? and who’s Gimpel the Shamash? Sounds like the title of a story by Isaac Bashevis Singer or someone like that.
When someone says “just sayin”, to me it sounds like they are trying to make sure you know that they are trying to attack you.
Reminds me of the time when a friend of mine apologized for a comment she had made to me earlier in the day. I hadn’t realized she had meant to offend me, and she knew that I hadn’t realized it, and apparently this really bothered her so by apologizing she had the opportunity to explain to me how what she had said had been meant to put me down (apparently she had been upset by something I had said that I hadn’t realized was upsetting to her and she wanted to pay me back by putting me down but then was annoyed that I didn’t chap that it was a put-down.). Then when she realized I still wasn’t that offended even after she explained, she kept going on about how nasty her comment was (she sounded very proud of herself for coming up with the comment and she really wanted to make sure I realized how insulting it was).
I didn’t mean Frum Jew. I just didn’t want to spell out what I meant on a public website.
You can also ask to sit next to a 613er. Some of my (less Yeshivish) family members were shocked when I mentioned that I did that. I was shocked that they were shocked.
if I already had a seat, how could they ask about aisle or window? Anyhow, I remember her asking if I want to sit next to a lady. That’s how I knew there’s such a concept.
Wait, I think I know what happened. She may have just checked for me and told me that I was next to a lady and then she told me that it’s possible to ask for it.
yeah, what evidence?
He probably meant LU. If so, the emphasis was more on the “political” than the long. And hey, no one has to read my posts if they don’t want to.
btw, I can’t stand the expression “just sayin” I feel like it has a very negative connotation, and I’ve been seeing it a lot lately. I wonder if people realize how it sounds. Also wonder if it does in fact sound that way to others besides me. (in this case, it didn’t bother me so much because what you were saying wasn’t so negative. It bothered me much more the other times I saw it used).
I think if you say toot by itself it’s also a strawberry. the phrase “tutim v’rimonim” is running through my head for some reason. Actually, maybe it’s just in the plural form that we say tootim by itself. I never heard anyone say “tutei sadeh”.
actually, I think that the first time I heard of it, it may have been from a frum ElAl person at the airport who asked me if I wanted what she referred to as “mehadrin seating”. That was the first time I heard of it.
That’s how I remember it, but does that make sense? Don’t you usually get a seat when you call and reserve your ticket? Is it possible that someone at the airport asked me what seat I wanted?
How could someone be neither a lady or a gentleman? You mean frogs?
I don’t know if it’s official. It was through Frum travel agents. Yes, it was ElAl. Although if you’re working with Frum travel agents, perhaps it can be done with other airlines as well.
LB, maybe one of them is Geordie. Which one do you think is him?
I do things like that too sometimes – figure things out after or as I’m writing them. I feel like I do that a lot in the CR.
“They are an excellent Car Service.”
+1. They are really good. I used to enjoy going with them. Had some great shmoozes with some of the drivers. It made me feel like I was back in E”Y striking up conversations about Judaism with random people from various backgrounds at busstops.
That is funny!!! I was sure that you wrote that BECAUSE you thought that.
Was. He mentioned once that he used to go by another name, but I didn’t know what it was till now.
If you go to his profile, you will see that he has only been Little Froggie for two years, and if you go to ZeesKite’s profile, you will see that he last posted 2 years ago.
When you reserve the seat in the first place, you can request to be placed next to someone of the same gender.
Once you are on the plane, it doesn’t sound right to me to expect someone from ElAl to ask someone to switch for you, since it’s not assur halachically, and you know when you get on the plane that this can happen.
Also, unlike busses, I don’t think it’s dangerous for a woman to have a man sit next to her on a plane; it’s just uncomfortable.
I would have no problem asking someone to switch, but it doesn’t sound right to me to have an ElAl person ask them, since it’s not really a religious issue since it’s not assur halachically, and it’s not fair to make someone feel like they HAVE to switch (which is how they would feel if asked by an ElAl person).
That is my opinion, but I could be wrong.
me too. I thought of it, but was unsure until I saw your post. That raised my suspicions because you tend to be pretty good at these things.
But I’m still not sure – could be either way.
That’s reasonable if you really felt those things were important to you. With all the people on the plane, they should be able to find someone willing to switch.