A Woman Outside Brooklyn

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  • in reply to: Brooklyn Wedding Halls #729857

    We made a chasuna at Tiferes Mordechai about a year and half ago. Was totally satisfied with every aspect, highly recommended. The manager was extremely pleasant to deal with, very much worked with us. because there’s no carpeting around the dance floor, it makes the size very flexible, and they set up the tables to maximize the dance space. Some people don’t like that everything is in one room. We’re not that fancy, and neither are the mechatunim, so no one minded, and they pretty much have the setup routine down to a science so it’s not too uncomfortable after the chuppah. The chossan/kallah room was spacious, there is an elevator, valet parking was extra, but not unreasonable. And the food was just fine – I didn’t get to eat much at our simcha, naturally, but I’ve had it at others, so that’s how I know (my favorite is the squash soup). In fact, when i wanted to order certain dishes, the manager recommended not when he didn’t feel he’d get top (seasonal) quality at that time. Minimum was 180 couples, we may have had slightly less, i’ve been to other simchas there that were closer to 500, and no problem.

    in reply to: The Word Chain Game – Nov 4th Game #1110148

    notes sung

    in reply to: The Word Chain Game – Nov 4th Game #1110135

    brewing coffee in the coffee room

    in reply to: Type of External Drive #736083

    I’ve seen a lot of 1 TB (1,024 gigs 1 TB) for just a bit more then the Iomega you described. Personally, I’d rather spend a drop more and get a lot more space. I remember when I bought a 250GB external drive, I thought it was so large until everyone backed up their computers on to it, and we all have lots of mp3 files. Just recently I read in a tech journal that cloud computing is the wave of the future. Rather then have a physical device, we’d be storing data on computers somewhere out there (hence, in the clouds). For instance, lots of companies use storage at Amazon.com for their cloud storage. I have an account with Microsoft’s Windows Live that gives you 25GB free storage, good for backing up documents and photos.

    in reply to: Top 5 websites? #726983

    My tree (especially my own branches) does not go back anywhere nearly as far as the aforementioned. However, Geni does allow you to see how’re you’re “connected” to others, which in my case is such a convulated path that I couldn’t even attempt to explain it. But try it – it’s fun! Search for a famous Gadol, for example, and then Geni will tell you whether you’re connected, click on the link to see how, and then have a laugh.

    in reply to: Top 5 websites? #726972

    How could I have forgotten two that I visit and spend time on:

    Facebook (see previous threads for my feelings on this)

    Geni – through which I’ve connected to lots of extended branches, and found out I’m connected to Rashi. Fascinating.

    in reply to: Give Gentiles Presents During Their Holiday Time #724733

    Question, on the “holiday” week the person who delivers Mishpacha left an envelope with the magazines, obviously expecting a tip. How much did you give him/her?

    in reply to: Top 5 websites? #726943

    pretty similiar, just substitute drudgereport for your seminary blog.

    in reply to: Communities for Baalei Tshuva #723948

    Vis a vis shidduchim, ,ultimately, it’s not as important where you live as who you know and who knows you. Do you have people to visit in various communities on Shabbos and Yom Tov? A boy could be learning in a totally different city, if it’s besharit, it’ll happen. But you do need to consider which communities will be supportive of wherever it is you’re holding, and will encourage you to continue to grow.

    Still voting for Queens, Passaic, and yes, Far Rockaway is a great choice too. However, they come under the “Queens” umbrella, even if they don’t admit it. If there were a way to private message on YWN, I’d be able to extend an invite to you for a Shabbos in my community (which is outside of Brooklyn, of course).

    in reply to: Communities for Baalei Tshuva #723942

    Queens or Passaic would be my choice. Well blended communities with incredible amounts of chesed. And close enough to Brooklyn to go there whenever the mood strikes, but the capability to live in a community where people say Good Shabbos to everyone. Lots of singles in both. What type of work do you do? Without a job, you’re nowhere.

    in reply to: Keeping in touch with old friends, who are Non Jewish #723352

    Is exchanging emails really the same as socializing? Personally, I often find my non-Jewish friends are more tolerant and understanding of my life style then non-religious Jewish friends. Therefore, I hold that there is no reason you can’t continue your contact. And should you get together socially, I’ve never encountered any issues there either. My friends have been more then willing to come to kosher restaurants with me, and are totally respectful.

    Sometimes Torah views can be masked generically. For instance, while we wouldn’t try to explain the concept of Loshon Hora, we could write that we really try hard not to gossip about others because it could hurt their feelings.

    in reply to: Tzedakah Calls #718334

    My list of most annoying phone tactics:

    1. those who start out with a “thank you for your donation of $xx last year…”, when I never actually gave them anything.

    2. Automated messages. I always hang up on those, if they’re too important to talk to me personally, I’m too busy to listen

    3. Strong arm tactics

    4. Continuous calling from the same organization

    in reply to: Tzedakah Calls #718332

    Another reason I won’t give over the phone is that what 100% assurance do I have that the person taking my payment info is the person they alledge to be, representing an authentic tzedakah. There are notorious callers who do things like call with a slightly different name then the real one, so the listener probably won’t pick up the difference, and in reality, it’s a scam. I ask for an envelope, and refuse to commit to an amount, because what if, for whatever reason, I don’t have the funds I pledged when I get the envelope. If they’re not willing to do it that way, i tell them then they’ll get zero.

    in reply to: Tzedakah Calls #718327

    During the series of aforementioned calls, I did ask one of the callers if she were a volunteer or a telemarketer. She told me that she was a telemarketer, after which I came to my decision. This org needs to combine its lists (which it generates from a great many sources, such as shuls, websites, email lists, and of course, previous donations) to avoid duplication and wasted money calling the same people (who happen to be on different lists). As someone who works with data analysis tools daily, I offered to help them.

    in reply to: Marrying Out! #718309

    That’s exactly what my mother told me when I was a youngster about why shiksas want to marry Jewish men! The saddest situation is when it’s your oldest friend’s child who is marrying out (the future spouse is having a deformed “conversion”). I can’t be any part of the non-simcha, and it’s definitely put more then a strain on our friendship.

    in reply to: Marrying Out! #718304

    Wish I could remember where it was, but recently I read an essay someone wrote about how in the previous generation, even if families were semi-observant or even not religous at all, there was a strong sense of pride in being Jewish. Many women were involved in Jewish organizations such as Hadassah, and there was also a lot of pride in Israel. However, their children haven’t carried on this trend – their Judaism means nothing to them other then some culinary experiences (matzohs in the spring, tzimmis in the fall). I think it was Heshy Fried on frumsatire.com who once pointed out that more people who attended Talmud Torah leave the fold then any other group. In fact, many BT’s come from zero background, versus “traditional”. It’s very sad what’s going on.

    in reply to: Tzedakah Calls #718323

    Something very similiar to Feif Un’s story happened to me just a few months ago. A particular organization that I do happen to be familiar with called. Since I’d already received an envelope, and was planning on sending something in, I told that to the caller. About a week later, another call comes in for the same org. I again explained that someone had already contacted me and that I would be mailing it in. Well, when I last counted, I’d received, over the course of approximately 2 weeks, over six different calls. I’d told caller #3 to please remove me from their calling list. Ditto the subsequent callers. By the time the last one called, I was so fed up with their constant calling that I decided not to send anything in, because if this org was spending so much on telemarketing, then I didn’t feel they would use my tzedakah money wisely either. I sent the director of this org an email explaining exactly that. P.S., no one has called me from there since.

    in reply to: Your Dream-Ticket for 2012 #903321

    If the economy remains the main issue, that plays to Christie’s favor. If it’s back to national security, that will tilt the tables to someone with that experience.

    Loved the point about Jeb needing a name change in order to be considered.

    in reply to: The Maccabeats #834870

    In the “modern” music world, Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach zt”l was truly original, sang for Rav Aharon Kotler zt”l, yet so many mocked him during his lifetime.

    in reply to: The Maccabeats #834869

    Or if someone listened to MBD singing “Yidden”. How many times does it have to be mentioned, that like Yiddish, Jewish Music is frequently a patchwork of music from wherever we happen to be in golus. Which is why klezmar sounds different then Yemeni.

    in reply to: The Real Fraud: The Shaitel Business #721822

    Not that long ago many/some of us wore synthetic or synthetic blends. European hair is a relative “mainstream” newcomer, largely brought about since the Indian hair issue, prior to which human was good enough. But even back then, non-Jews, and for that matter, NYF, rarely could detect that it’s a wig. They don’t have that automatic antenna for sheitels that we frum women do.

    in reply to: Your Dream-Ticket for 2012 #903318

    Very interesting analysis, Dave Hirsch!

    What’s needed is another Ronald Reagan, but there’s no one on the horizon that comes close to the combo of popularity, personality, conservative credentials and viability. While another campaign with Palin would inspire tons of great videos on youtube by Tina Fey, she’s no more ready for the big show now then she was in 2008. Romney? He’s high in the current polls, but incredibily uninspiring. Christie? That could be a possibilty, stay tuned.

    Dream team for Dems – Obama & Biden because they’re beatable.

    in reply to: Automatic Lights and Videos on Shabbos #716716

    To Trying my Best, do live up to your name and try your best to ask this question of your LOR! Coffee rooms are for shmoozing, not the place to get a posuk halacha.

    in reply to: The Real Fraud: The Shaitel Business #721805

    Just recently I went to a sheitel sale and ran into a kallah that I know for a long time. To be honest, I’d never have thought she would be covering her hair – her family has always been very MO. My point is that a lot of young ladies, such as this one, who 15+ years ago wouldn’t have covered their hair, are now doing so because they don’t have to look weird to do so. Hats, tichels etc are lovely in the neighborhood, but for those of us who work in the secular world, we have to fit in somewhat. However, on the otherhand, $3,000 is outrageously expensive. I could buy a car for that much, or pay a good chunk of my kids’ tuitions. That’s the part that has gotten out of hand.

    in reply to: Favorite Jewish Speakers? #717187

    Some of my favorites, in no particular order, are Rabbis Frand, Orlofsky, Rietti, Wallerstein and Shafier. My Ipod is reflective of that.

    in reply to: The Maccabeats #834862

    Saw the video the other night, my sons showed it to me. They knew it was a parody of a goyish song, I didn’t – and still haven’t got a clue about the original song. But this is quite cute and well done! To all the above posters who think this is “harmful”, get a life. Do you really think someone will see this and think it’s not a good representation of some pleasant, clean cut young men having a good time? If you do, get a life! Besides which, the aforementioned People’s Court video is a much more negative view, and surely problematic.

    I remember showing the Lecha video that was out a few years ago to some non-Jewish coworkers, and they loved the dancing!

    in reply to: Cognitive Dissonance: My Own OTD story #715858

    Clever, I don’t know how I’d missed this thread previously, and admit, beyond your initial post, didn’t read all the responses. But the day you hope is the day is probably the day you cried out here. You’re nowhere near as far away as you perceive.

    You probably can surmise by my screen name that I share your feelings about Brooklyn being the be all and end all of Yiddishkeit. There are many communities out there that don’t fall into that mentality.

    Remember, we as Jews are constantly striving to grow, and compete with the Yetza Hora. We can do tshuva at any time, and Hashem is always there to welcome us home.

    in reply to: How Do I Kasher A Microwave? #716421

    But by virtue of the fact, Frumlady, that those parts become the hottest, aren’t they virtually self-cleaning, like a regular oven? That’s the whole principal behind self-cleaning, raising it to an enormously high heat till things literally burn off. Many Rabbonim are very familiar with the mechanics of all appliciances – they have to be in order to answer the questions we bring to them. CR is fine for shooting the breeze on these issues, but anyone who relys on anything they read here about kashrus or otherwise is really in need of some serious guidance.

    in reply to: How Do I Kasher A Microwave? #716419

    What Frumladygit might be thinking of is kashering a microwave for Pesach, not for general usage. Because we are much stricter about even a minute amount of chometz, many Poseks hold that the microwave you use during the year cannot be thoroughly cleaned for Pesach because there might be chometz in the parts she spoke about. However, this is not applicable during the year.

    in reply to: Why type of car do you have? #714241

    Nothing to lie about with mine – an ’05 Kia Sportage. We originally wanted a Rav4 or CRV, the Kia provided the same capabilities with a lower price (we bought it in 2008). I’ve been very happy with it, except that it’s not too good on gas mileage. My son has an ’07 Nissan Versa that he just got when it came off of a lease.

    in reply to: Give Gentiles Presents During Their Holiday Time #724714

    Obviously, Minyan Gal and I are of the same mindset. Yes, I surely am well aware of how much of our blood has been spilled as a result of that day. But on a purely practical level, if you work among non-Jews, and they wish you a Happy Chanukah (and most do), then it would be quite rude not to respond in kind. If I’m stating “your holiday” I’m making a statement that it is in no way MY holiday, but they walk off happier, and the work environment is not strained.

    in reply to: Give Gentiles Presents During Their Holiday Time #724702

    Agreed. My housekeeper surely anticipates a bonus. And good idea about emphasizing “your” holiday – that works just as well in the work environment in wishing coworkers a pleasent holiday season, ie, tell them “enjoy your holiday”.

    in reply to: A Need For Plus Size Clothing Stores #712523

    Up until my late 30’s, I was never heavy. Then it hit, and as I’ve got (even) older, my metabolism has gotten down to a crawl. Trust me, it isnt’ always so easy to lose weight, so thin women, don’t be so judgmental.

    Which store in BP carries larger sizes? I’d be very interested in a store where I could find simcha clothes (not MOB, but rather, outfits I can wear to other’s simchas). Yes, Dress Barn Women sometimes has tznius skirts, but for simcha-quality, fahgetaboutit. Most of the frum boutiques only carry sizes from 0-14, and their styles are for women up to about 25. They need to realize that some of us are bubbys, not teenagers. On the otherhand, the large sizes, even in the better department stores, are often quite ugly, like they still haven’t moved away from the mau mau look. For work, I often buy knit skirts online from Lands End. The length is fine, they last forever.

    in reply to: Young Couples In Israel #713537

    Actually, Yeshivaguy1 isn’t totally wrong. There’s a huge turnover of apartments every new zmanin in Ramot Eshkol and Maalot Dafna, because so many of those apartments belong to couples where the husband is in the Mir for a few years, and then they’ll come back to the states, and either go to Lakewood, or maybe he’ll go into business. In the meantime, many of the parents have redone their Israel apartments beautifully, which of course, makes them very pricey when they flip them.

    As far as whether or not all the husbands are truly learning, I’m certainly in no position to say. The same guys described above as just hanging out would probably be doing in the same thing in the USA. Our kids made aliyah, and a good part of what they love about Israel (among many, many others), is that it’s not goshmiyos oriented the way the USA is. They live very simply. But my daughter was never into the designer mentality that so many of our BY girls are into – remember the story about the woman who asked, after seeing a group of frum girls on a camp trip, whether it was a religious requirement to wear Ralph Lauren skirts?

    in reply to: Jews And Starbucks #799628

    Just to clarify, I’m referring to, for example, going to Pathmark/Waldbaums/Shoprite – you know, your standard regular grocery store, and buying a half a watermelon. I wasn’t talking about fruit salad type cut up.

    Mod, I’m confused where I fit in your concept that “the generally more machmir crowd is taking the side of Mutar here.

    the generally more makil crowd is taking the side of Assur”. But that’s OK, the Rav referred to is a Posek who gets calls from around the world, and studied halacha under Rav Elyashiv shlita.

    It’s the old story, told on YWN and elsewhere that it often takes more knowledge to know what’s muttar then what’s assur.

    in reply to: Jews And Starbucks #799615

    A Rav told us that in a greengrocer, the cut up melon is not a problem, because a green grocer only sells fruits and veggies, not ham sandwiches. He also says that goyim are very particular about what knives they use, and they wouldn’t use the same knife they slice meat with to cut produce. I’d find it hard to believe that no one who’s cried “ussar” in this thread hasn’t ever bought a cut up watermelon in a grocery store.

    in reply to: Jews And Starbucks #799604

    In Los Angeles they have a Starbucks like chain called “Coffee Bean and Tea”. Every store we were in (this is going back 4-5 years) had a hechsher, don’t remember which, but do remember from my pre-trip planning, that it was widely accepted in LA. Not only were ALL the coffees kosher, but so was everything that was sold in the store – sandwiches, muffins, etc. After I came back to NY, I sent them an email complimenting them – as the stores were also very pleasant to sit in. Unfortunately, whoever the owner(s) are, didn’t have the big bucks it would take to open a franchise in NYC. This is their kashrut info from their website http://coffeebean.com/Keeping-Kosher-W249C125.aspx.

    in reply to: I Miss Essex On Coney #711642

    Along with missing Shmulka’s, which was a long ago pleasure, I truly miss Dougies in KGH. It was a nicer atmosphere and better food then the one in Brooklyn, plus what’s there now is one of those Bucharian restaurants where there’s mixed dancing and a weird hechsher.

    in reply to: Any Ideas For A Winter Getaway #711143

    Definitely Rocking Horse Ranch.

    in reply to: I Miss Essex On Coney #711639

    My vote goes to Shmulka Bernsteins. I can’t come off the Williamsburg Bridge in Manhattan without feeling my mouth water. Plus it was such a fun place to go to very late on a Motzei Shabbos.

    in reply to: Inviting Non-Jewish Co-Workers To A Simcha? #1144071

    The above re Rabbi Lookstein was covered in The Bourbon Room on the ObamaWorld.com website during a discussion in their forum on whether or not Obama should/could invite a Jew to his inaguration.

    in reply to: Jews And Starbucks #799584

    Are the sandwiches prepared in individual stores (which would then mean equipment needing washing), or do they get delivered pre-packaged? For example,Dunkin Donuts are set up so that one store will bake the donuts for several others, which are then delivered to the other local operations. So you’ll see donuts being baked at DD on Burnside Ave (which is certified kosher), which are then in turn distributed to several other local DD’s.

    in reply to: Borsalino Hat #1082684

    Kova won my total appreciation a few years ago when we came in with one of my (then mesivta aged) son’s hats, which had been typically tossed around in yeshiva, thrown into the locker after davening, and in need of some serious TLC. Here we were ideal pickings to sell a new hat to, and instead they took his old hat, fixed it up nicely with a cleaning, blocking etc. and sent us home with a hat that still looked decent enough to wear for davening, saving us upwards of $100 I’m sure.

    in reply to: Inviting Non-Jewish Co-Workers To A Simcha? #1144055

    Are CN and MR one in the same?

    Where did we lose the original topic about inviting non-Jewish guests to our simchas?

    And let’s leave the Holocaust out of this thread. Obviously, 90% of us realize that not every goy is standing with a knife behind their back, and we all know stories about righteous goyim who saved Jews. Ever hear of a book called “The Diary of Anne Frank” for starters? My aunt and uncle were hidden by goyish neighbors for the duration of the war, and lived to tell of it.

    Re my comment, many pages ago about mosques, I realize I erred greatly by implying it was halacha. It was a mistaken assumption on my part based on our not entering churches or conservative or deformed “temples”. But it is a good example of how all these arguments started, we assume something is assur or muttar, but assumptions are dangerous. I stand corrected.

    in reply to: English Music #746463

    Last night I watched a film on iTunes of the Beatles performing in 1964, their first USA concert. This was all part of iTunes promo that they now offer all of the Beatles albums. The music was so innocent and still very fresh after all these years, it was a pleasure to watch. If this were the secular music that’s around now, this would be a much shorter discussion.

    Now if only iTunes carried Lipa as well!

    in reply to: Inviting Non-Jewish Co-Workers To A Simcha? #1143879

    I’m back (I do have a life, and don’t spend all my waking moments in the CR). But Chesedname, maybe I just didn’t care for the way you stated that “it’s disguisting” to invite non-Jews to our simchas. And as far as “reciprocating”, obviously going into a church or mosque is out of the question, but they’re usually very understanding. However, don’t ever try explaining to a non-frum coworker or relative that you can’t come to their deformed temple for their simchas.

    in reply to: Inviting Non-Jewish Co-Workers To A Simcha? #1143857

    Just curious, how did chesedname come upon that screen name, when all of his/her comments seem to indicate the opposite? Actually, he’s probably just trying to get a rise out of people.

    Wealth? We’re the ones who make chasunas in converted factories for under $100 per person in most cases, while they’re doing the Plaza or other equally elaborate places at way more $ per couple. Just the cost of the alcohol alone is probably more then we spend on an entire simcha.

    in reply to: Inviting Non-Jewish Co-Workers To A Simcha? #1143848

    We’ve done it a few times, without any issues, and they all had a great time. A very lovely coworker/friend of mine (who happens to be black), came to a simcha and I was delighted to have the opportunity to dance with her!

    We originally were going to have a mixed table to goishe coworkers, but not enough came to fill a separate table. We explained what the seating would be like, and they had no problems. Too bad non-frum Jews can’t be as accommodating.

    in reply to: English Music #746458

    To be honest, I’m not “up” at all on the music of this century. The secular stuff my kids liked was mainly music from the sixties and seventies. Hence, our spending time discussing what’s inappropriate about a lot of the lyrics. In fact, even when I tried listening to a Yid like Y-Love, I could barely understand a word he was saying/singing/rapping, whatever it is he does. Ditto Matisyahu, although I do like the sound of his stuff, since I happen to like reggae. I’m starting to feel like my own parents probably did when I was listening to rock ‘n roll back in the day.

    So what’s the consensus here, not about s#x, but about music?

    in reply to: English Music #746448

    My kids were familiar with secular music, and liked some of it when they were in their teens. Now, as they’ve advanced in life to being yeshiva bochurim and post-seminary, they’ve opted out of their own accord. We always discussed why certain secular music is inappropriate. Perhaps I’m of the school of thought that with kids, if you make something totally ussur, you’re actually making it seem more interesting to curious kids.

    Enroute to one of my kids in Israel is a CD of Beatles music (instrumental) as performed by Arthur Fiedler and the Boston Pops Orchestra. This was a suggestion one of her rebbeim in seminary gave her as a kosher way to enjoy the music she likes.

Viewing 50 posts - 251 through 300 (of 382 total)