heimesheyid

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  • in reply to: Singles Over the Age of 25 Should Deal Directly With the Shaddchan #671680

    heimesheyid
    Member

    devils_advocate, I will be one of the few that will agree with you. Only because I know firsthand how when I was in shidduchim I was blinded by certain things that only a parent can protect you from. And no I was not 18. But there are certain things in life that come only with experience no matter how mature u r.

    in reply to: Health Care #671548

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Can anyone validate 2 concerns that I have heard:

    1) the top specialists will look elsewhere for work since it wont be worth it for them with this new healthcare plan?

    2) Waiting times for specialty doctors will be much longer since the incentive to please will be lost?

    in reply to: Health Care #671540

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Is this a done deal, or there is a chance that it will still not go through?

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1172353

    heimesheyid
    Member

    xerox, sounds very complicated, please post the answer.

    Mods, what happened to not approving posts off topic, maybe start a thread “see if u can figure out what I look like”…

    This is supposed to be a humor thread, not a guessing game!!

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1172349

    heimesheyid
    Member

    ok now back to humor, anyone got any more jokes?

    in reply to: Short Dating Time #646317

    heimesheyid
    Member

    ames, reminds me of my cousin, that dated a girl for around 10 times, they had their issues that they spoke about and straightened out. He took her all over to get to know diff points of her character, out to eat, to arcades, to a painting expidition…and guess what when they got enagaged they were thrilled! One more guess, 4 weeks b4 the wedding the engagement was broken. You see, there is no perfect way, u need to follow the derech that u feel suits u, according to the rabbanim that u follow, and u need to beg Hashem that the shidduch u eventually decide to go with is ur true bashert.

    P.S. My cousin has a couple of children now already, he got engaged to someone else, a doll of a girl. He only met her around 5 times!! He was also very careful during the engagement, upon the advice of his Rosh Yeshiva, not to speak or see too often.

    in reply to: Married Couple Dates #638081

    heimesheyid
    Member

    oomis1105, thats a really nice idea, but why do u share a bagel, i would never get full from a half a bagel and neither would my spouse. If the idea is sharing, then i think we would share 2 bagels….

    in reply to: Short Dating Time #646303

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Oomis “I was fixed up after a couple of years of hearing about how wonderful he was, how smart, how learned, what good yichus, blah, blah, blah.”

    When one is finding serious info about a boy or girl, the qualities u mention above are not the ones being stressed. Those inquiring are asking about MIDDOS, exactly the issue of the boy that surprised u. When I say asking I mean digging. Phone calls are made not just to Roshei Yeshiva, but to roommates, chavrusahs etc.

    000646, I dont think it was a study, it was the result of meeting real problem facing real problems and thus coming to a conclusion.

    in reply to: Short Dating Time #646298

    heimesheyid
    Member

    It makes a lot of sense to me that since litvishe couples are more open to varied background and family types that longer dating times are appropriate, since most conversations will revolve around the type of houses the 2 of of them will build. While when u take a more chassidish girl/boy that dates a family type just like her own, and her parents met the girl/boy before her, and u do a lot of research beforehand, they will need less dating time. It all adds up…

    in reply to: Married Couple Dates #638065

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Better than watch the shidduch dates, play shidduch date! Pretend to date your spouse but add in really funny things, said loud enough so the other shidduch dates can hear

    if his wife is wearing a sheitel it might be a giveaway…

    in reply to: Funny Shidduch Stories #1226223

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Another story my sister had was she met a boy and she thought he was learning in a BMG while he was really in small yeshiva near NJ. So she asked him, How many guys are in the yeshiva like 5,000?” so he looked at her confused and he said “not really, more like 50..” they had a whole mixed up conversation unitl she finally said, “arn’t u in BMG?”, and he burst out laughing…

    in reply to: Funny Shidduch Stories #1226216

    heimesheyid
    Member

    These stories are really funny, but I they would never happen in our circles. We have very traditional dating, boy comes to pick up the girl and they go to a hotel lounge. Sit there, walk around, buy a drink, and go home. We dont go out to eat or to the sky ride etc…so the best story I can tell is when my sister left her gloves in her dates car. she realized as soon as she got home, and was really ashamed. The next day we found it in the mailbox.

    in reply to: What’s Your Favorite Restaurant In Town? #666646

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Boro Park favorite is Mcfleishigs, ever taste a Boro Park sandwich from there, my mouth is watering. They are not too expensive either, which is another great part!

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1172181

    heimesheyid
    Member

    A large milk company, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO.

    This new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a

    tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning on a wall. The room was

    full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business!

    The new CEO walked up to the guy leaning against the wall and asked,

    ‘How much money do you make a week?’ A little surprised, the young fellow

    looked at him and replied, ‘I make $300.00 a week. Why?’The CEO then

    handed the guy $1,200 in cash and screamed, ‘Here’s four weeks’ pay,

    now GET OUT and don’t come back.’ Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO

    looked around the room and asked, ‘Does anyone want to tell me what that

    goof-off did here?’ From across the room came a voice, ‘Pizza delivery guy from

    Domino’s.’

    in reply to: Daven With A Hat BeYichidus or Without it with a Minyan #1082058

    heimesheyid
    Member

    I dont get the question, why would a hat make the difference. Go daven with a minyan in ur hat!

    Is it better to eat berries without a bracha but ur knees are covered or to eat berries with bracha with ur knees uncovered…

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1172180

    heimesheyid
    Member

    ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?

    WITNESS: July 18th.

    ATTORNEY: What year?

    WITNESS: Every year.

    _____________________________________

    ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

    WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks

    ______________________________________

    ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

    WITNESS: Yes.

    ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

    WITNESS: I forget.

    ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

    ____________________________________

    ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?

    WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.

    ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?

    WITNESS: Forty-five years.

    ___________________________________

    ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?

    WITNESS: Uh, he’s twenty-one.

    _______________________________________

    ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?

    WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?

    ______________________________________

    ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?

    WITNESS: Yes.

    ATTORNEY: How many were boys?

    WITNESS: None.

    ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

    ______________________________________

    ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?

    WITNESS: By death.

    ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

    ______________________________________

    ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?

    WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.

    ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

    _____________________________________

    ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?

    WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

    ______________________________________

    ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

    WITNESS: Oral.

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1171955

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Here’s another good one…

    VERY IMPORTANT NOTICE TO ALL EMPLOYEES

    Company Policy, Effective January 1, 2010

    Dress Code

    It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Pradas and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially, and therefore do not need a raise. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better so that you can buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be, and therefore you do not need a raise.

    Sick Days

    We will no longer accept a doctor’s note as proof of illness. If you are well enough to go to the doctor, you are well enough to come to work.

    Annual Leave Days

    Each employee will now receive 104 days of annual leave each year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.

    Bereavement Leave

    This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In the rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your Lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour earlier.

    Lunch Break

    Skinny people get thirty minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy. Normal sized people get fifteen minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Chubby people get five minutes for lunch, because that’s all the time you need to drink a Slim-Fast.

    Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

    Thank you

    The Management.

    in reply to: Personal Connversations #633739

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Some bloggers in the coffee room think they are so funny. Sometimes I wonder how old the pple I am conversing with are.

    in reply to: Following the Goldbergs #634241

    heimesheyid
    Member

    You want to know how to protect urself, be weary of ur neighbors. There are som areas more prone to materialism, where u live and who ur friends are have a big effect on ur attitudes and wants.

    in reply to: At Risk Teenager #633803

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Rabbi Daniel Machanic is fantastic. You can ask him any question in the world, and he will explain it to you in a way thats really easy to understand. Dont be afraid to ask but be sure you are to the right person.

    in reply to: A Humorous Item #1171920

    heimesheyid
    Member

    I don’t know if this is exactly humorous, but I found it cute:

    Today on my way to lunch I passed a homeless guy with a sign that read ‘Vote Obama, I need the money.’ I laughed.

    Once in the restaurant my server had on a ‘Obama 08’ pin on his shirt, again I laughed as he had given away his political preference–just imagine the coincidence.

    When the bill came I decided not to tip the server and explained to him that I was exploring the Obama redistribution of wealth concept. He stood there in disbelief while I told him that I was going to redistribute his tip to someone who I deemed more in need–the homeless guy outside. The server angrily stormed from my sight.

    I went outside, gave the homeless guy $5 and told him to thank the server inside as I’ve decided he could use the money more. The homeless guy was grateful.

    At the end of my rather unscientific redistribution experiment I realized the homeless guy was grateful for the money he did not earn, but the waiter was pretty angry that I gave away the money he did earn even though the actual recipient deserved money more.

    I guess redistribution of wealth is an easier thing to swallow in concept than in practical application.

    OR IS IT THAT REDISTRIBUTION OF SOMEONE ELSE’S WEALTH IS A GREAT IDEA…………..or just a fools game !!

    in reply to: Shadchanim #632998

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Mrs. Beautiful, all this is easy to say when u meet the guy and as u put it he is “refreshing”. Sometimes dating is not as clear cut. You have ur hesitations, so u try again, and then u r not sure if u have enough reason to break off so u try yet again. I agree with the point that meetings should be taken very seriously and pple shouldnt be meeting unlimited amount of times…listen its not always so easy….

    in reply to: Personal Connversations #633717

    heimesheyid
    Member

    squeak, c’mon do u honestly think that that is the same. She is simply saying that this is a discussion forum not a chat room. That is so simple to understand…

    in reply to: Summer Camp #626671

    heimesheyid
    Member

    AHHH, thinking back to the good ol’ camp days…Not e/o loves it, but for those that did, like me…the memories are a treasure

    in reply to: Shidduch Priorities #637656

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Yichus is not everything, but there is something special about having chusheva Zeidas. Picture having a Seder with a Zeide that has been at the Seder of the Chazon Ish ZT”L or of the Steipler ZT”L. I would certainly not put Yichus on my “looking for” list, but it something very special.

    in reply to: Recipe for the Yummiest Latkas! #626607

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Add a carrot to ur latke for nic coloring and gr8 taste

    in reply to: Dating: Parents or Girl? #652084

    heimesheyid
    Member

    I think this whole forum boils down to the type u r. R u chassidish then ur parents do a most of the legwork. In the Litvishe world, parents have minimum say to their children’s shidduchim.

    Interstingly enough though, Dr. Yael Respler, who is not chassidish, constantly praises the chassidishe method of dating, and encourages Litvishe to encorprate this method as well.

    For those of u that dont know Dr. Yael, she deals with hundreds of marriage/divorce counselings. so I would venture to say she has LOADS of experience.

    in reply to: Gifts on Chanukah – How Often? #628089

    heimesheyid
    Member

    When I think of Chanukah I think of Latkes, chocolate coins, and donuts YUM…WHO NEEDS ANYTHING MORE?

    in reply to: Random Questions #1077794

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Mrs. B, I agree that in such a public forum how can one person say “dont wear…” I mean I am from BP, the styles u see in some of our neighboring communities would not be acceptable in my neighborhood.

    It’s very important though not to look down upon those that are not on ur level of tznius. In fact by being friendly and warm to EVERYONE, u r actually encouraging them to dress and behave in the modest way that u do.

    in reply to: Starbucks Coffee #626622

    heimesheyid
    Member

    There is a gas station in BP that also has some kosher shakes, but the Kashrus of these places that also sell hotdogs and ham is questionable.

    I mean for those of us that live in populated Jewish areas like BP, LKWD, Flatbush etc, there are loads of coffee shops, r u gonna say that Starbucks sells something that Cafe K doesn’t?

    in reply to: Random Questions #1077698

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Ya know I just noticed this new cap sleeve fad, I think it is totally not Tzniusdig, especially when there is a contrasting color, say a white short sleeve sweater with a black tight shell. Besides for the fact that the shell hugs the arm, the contrast of colors is so flashy that it should be completely banned!!

    Why do we need to copy the horrific styles of these shiksas in Manhattan!! Is that who we look to emulate?

    in reply to: Women Driving #1161697

    heimesheyid
    Member

    Way to go “Proud Jew”… Let’s sing that loud so the world can hear…

    in reply to: Women Driving #1161696

    heimesheyid
    Member

    First of all let’s just back track a second.

    #1 Ladies are not supposed to be on the street period! ?? ????? ?? ??? ?????! And thats a Gemara! this whole thimg that ladies walk around on the street started just after the Milchamah and R’ Moshe Z”l write in a Tsuvah (Yoreh Deah 55)that he’s very disturbed about this fact, which started in America.

    #2 DELETED BY MODERATOR – THIS IS A WARNING

Viewing 33 posts - 1 through 33 (of 33 total)