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She’s too busy giving lectures at the event, but she sends regards.
ZD: One leads to the other.
ubiq: What’s the difference whether they would or would not ask a shaila beforehand. Jewish Law is that abortion is generally prohibited; exceptions are, for example, when the mother’s life is in danger based on various criteria. Jewish Law is that killing is generally prohibited; exceptions are self-defense. For example, if someone breaks into your home you can kill him on the spot (with some exceptions, such as if it’s your parent.)
Presumably you believe state law in the US should prohibit killing people. Even though the exceptions for self-defense might not reflect all halachic exceptions. In NY you cannot kill someone who breaks into your home. Do you therefore advocate that New York stop outlawing killing people?
Otherwise why would you oppose New York law generally outlawing abortion just as it outlaws killing. The state law exceptions for when you may kill someone and the state law exceptions for when you may abort a baby will not reflect halacha. That doesn’t mean you should oppose state law outlawing killing or outlawing abotions, generally.
The shadchan is never responsible for a future divorce. The couple decided and agreed to marry. The shadchan didn’t force them.
Ubiq: You missed my point. You wanted to know whether we should want state law to decide whether an abortion is justified based on the mother’s health (if abortion is against the law in other circumstances.) I compared your question to whether you want state law to decide whether killing someone is justified in self-defense? Suppose Halacha says yes (i.e someone broke into your home), must state law agree according to you?
Thanks
who do you want to be the one to decide what is considered “endangered” ?
Who do you want to be the one to decide whether killing someone is justified as self-defense? Your Rov? State law?
It’s also muttar to kill an adult in certain circumstances. i.e. self-defense. Would you therefore find it wrong to make a blanket statement that it is assur to kill an adult?
ftresi, it is sadly true that there’s a tznius problem even in frummer neighborhoods such as Boro Park and Flatbush. But that ignores the also sad reality that the extent of the problem is greater the more MO the neighborhood is. In Teaneck and the Five Towns you can easily find people who allegedly identify as Orthodox yet dress little differently than secular America. Pritzus by any definition. Denying that is burying one’s head in the sand. As you go to more Yeshivish neighborhoods like Flatbush, Monsey, Boro Park and Lakewood (yes, in that order) the problem becomes less noticable, comparably, even though it definitely still exists. And once you start getting to the Chasidish neighborhoods such as Williamsburg, New Square and Kiryas Yoel, you get to the point where the problem is really tiny. (Speaking, obviously, of the frum community, not the non-Orthodox/gentiles.)
Do you know when it is proper and not proper to use the Goral HaGRA?
Amil: akuperman specifically stated “but they get the money in the end.” Meaning even though they didn’t have to work, Congress will give them back-pay once a deal is reached and a budget is passed. It happened in every single previous shutdown. Congress paid them for the time they didn’t work.
If they collect unemployment currently, which they are legally entitled to do, they’ll have to refund the unemployment once they get their back-pay.
Good Yeshivos don’t have January breaks.
About 18 years ago at the Agudah Convention one of the gedolim encouraged newlyweds to setup shidduchim between their friends.
ubiquitin: Can you expand on your point, please? Why are the Yeshivish less strict about this issue than the Chasidim?
Coffee Addict: I don’t think OOT is better in tznius than in-town. In fact, it is better in many in town places (i.e. by the Chasidim, as ubiquitin pointed out above) than most OOT places.
RY23: We don’t ignore public malicious aveiros due to the reason that if we point them out the aveira the person might then yell I’ll just do more aveiros in retaliation.
They’ll have proof they have too many employees to begin with and can get the job done with a 33% staff reduction.
Clothing stores should require a hechsher, just like food requires, in order for frum women to be able to shop there
Shuls should refuse entry to women and their husband/father who goes in public pritzusdik. They should be shunned by the entire community.
AJ: The difference is that the OP is referring to purportedly frum women and girls, not the gentile women your story was regarding. And Jews are naturally more attracted to their own kind much more so than to gentiles and seculars. So the issue is far worse when it involves Jewish women, especially so-called religious ones.
funnybone: Please elaborate on this thought of yours that “There are times, my shisduch included, that no one who have thought of it and only a pro puts it together.” Using yourself as an example, why do you assume a non-professional shadchan would never have thought of it?
Not every secret causes a shidduch to fall into the halachic category of mekach taos. In fact, most don’t.
Bananas are a new world food.
Shopping613: For most of those things you can’t know even with (and after) the date. You can only really find out after the chasuna.
Go to Rav Chaim for a brocho.
If it does then Shmiras Einayim unquestionably takes precedence.
I would venture to say that most (likely the vast majority) of Chareidi marriages occur from shidduchim that were not redt by a professional shadchan.
You don’t become a lammud vovnik overnight. As your tzidkus grows, you grow into a bigger tzadik. When a lammud vovnik is niftar another tzadik reaches the madreiga of becoming a lammud vovnik. And the new lammud vovnik wasn’t a well known tzadik in the first place.
Any other secrets you need answers to?
What’s this whole todo with shadchanim, shadchanim, shadchanim. Everyone can get married without a professional shadchan. Family, friends, friends of friends, rabbonim, schoolmates, shul mates, acquaintances, neighbors and colleagues network and redt shidduchim. You don’t need a professional shadchan for that.
There are only 36 of them and their identities are a secret.
She’s probably preparing the family meal, which is her primary duty. So she’s doing the right thing. Compliment her.
Oftentimes they’ll dress tzniusdik on the date even though at other times they’ll sometimes go out non-tzniusdik.
I got married! The shidduch crisis is over
Lemme guess… you became akuperma’s wife?!
DovidBT: Shmiras Einayim is a law not just a fence. (Even had it been a fence, fences are binding not optional.)
RY23, attending a gym that has both genders utilizing it at the same time is prohibited by Jewish law.
Ubiq: “Its bad when all the research is separated from actually getting married”
Why/how is that bad?
“To paraphrase, Differetn expectations for where dating is supposed to lead .”
I asked you how if the Litvish change their system to be more like the Modern Orthodox, as you proposed that the Litvish allow boys and girls to directly hookup at weddings and other events. How’s “different expectations” explain why the Litvish should partially switch to the MO model?
What’s this business about “would feel more comfortable in an all-male gym”? Going to a non-all male gym is forbidden by Jewish law.
DY: Can you explain in more detail how a typical American Litvish marriage differs so much from a typical American Chasidish marriage?
Ubiq: What is “the bad part of chasidish dating” that you refer to? If it is that they research so much (far more than the Litvish) before seeing each other, how can you say it is bad if the system works well for them? In fact, they don’t have the shidduch crisis nearly to the extent as the Litvish have it.
And the MO do not have less if a shidduch crisis than the Litvish do (in fact you could argue they have it even worse), so how does your proposal that the Litvish adopt many aspects of the Modern Orthodox dating system, such as guys and gals hooking up at meals, weddings and events, going to help the Litvish when it isn’t helping the MO have a better marriage system than the Litvish? What leads you to believe such changes would be beneficial to the Litvish?
DY: Why would American Litvish style bochurim in terms of sholom bayis have it differently than American Chasidish bochurim in terms of sholom bayis, it they both followed the same system?
TLIK: Perhaps I overlooked your suggestion, but what, in detail, solution do you propose for the problem you describe?
Yeled is a not-for-profit?!
Me12345: 4″ could be part of the discussion, but I would suggest being more inclusive than just that narrow issue.
Mammele, both examples might be difficult, but doable. “Very difficult” can imply close to practically undoable, which is incorrect imo.
How is Yeled not paying for the property?