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That’s your introspection? Not to be more careful about loshon hora, shmirah einayim, etc. (I know these and other ruchniyusdik issues concern you, so I’m surprised.)?
It’s also misdirected introspection, as that wouldn’t have prevented this, as, to quote the article, “The dormitory-school at 996 Route 202, also known as Haverstraw Road, had been operating with a temporary certificate of occupancy…”.
More importantly, I don’t think you’re capable of that type of vitriol, but that would actually be a better example of introspection – you were insulted, and you therefore are thinking about your own bein adam l’chaveiro. Kudos for that.
Please explain why he’s wrong?!?
I did, as did NDG, and I feel no need to get into an endless cycle of repetitive argument with you.
As far as my honesty, quoting from the article: “Two Yeshiva students standing on the sidewalk after a long day at Yeshiva, when suddenly they were run over by an out of control vehicle.
That’s where I got my information from, I didn’t check Google Maps of go down there.
The way you were attacked was despicable.
Maybe I missed something, but telling a yeshiva where to open is not introspection, unless you’re an administrator for a yeshiva. You may have done a lot of introspection, and decided you need to work on your (fill in the blank), but that’s not what was expressed.
Also, if I’m reading correctly, there’s currently a temporary C of O, so I don’t see an issue.
Either way, I don’t call blaming a tragedy on someone else’s negligence introspection.
On another side note, I guess you managed to clear up the mbachur glitch. 🙂
The comments were nasty, but you are still wrong.
The accident (as reported) had nothing to do with any past zoning issues, and if you think a tragedy calls for introspection (it does) then do some introspection, but that’s not what you did.
Gavra, these weren’t little kids, and they were standing on the sidewalk.
On a side note, I think they need better moderation the main site. Too many nasty comments get through (and in this case a racist one as well).
It reminds me if when someone asked Rav Bick zt”l if he needs to say Birchas Hagomel since he missed his flight which ended up crashing.
Rav Bick responded with a shailah of his own: his trousers were hanging on the line and fell off, should he say Birchas Hagomel since he wasn’t in them?
I still say rather than bash the sellers, Maybe we need to look at ourselves and see what are we doing wrong, It is Elul, sometimes places to seek tshuva are hard to find and others stare us right in the face
I am not bashing the seller, but I am disturbed by how quickly people are bashing the customers.
I agree with you though that the issue is probably benign. My guess is that with large families, they were sending out 8 items and returning 6, which creates an inventory problem for a small business.
That is quite reasonable, and I think there is a chiyuv on all of us to judge our fellow Jews l’kaf z’chus instead of the other way.
Also, I think, factor in that the Torah values being careful with money (think pachim k’tanim), so when someone makes a legitimate purchase but it turns out to not be needed, it is proper to return it.
However, what may be proper for the individual turns into a headache for the seller.
You have hit one a major issue in the frum community today, Unfortunatly there IS corruption. and whenever it happens the Press jumps on it and people deny it.
We need to accept there is corruption and then do whatever it takes to eliminate it. We all see things that are corrupt. People see the hippocracy and corrutions by some and then begin to question everything and then go OTD. I dont need to repeat such things as people abusing Section 8 , paying off the books or other such things
We need to admit there is corruption and do whatever it takes to eliminate it.
One story in the paper about corruption will undo Years worth of Kiddish Hashem and then it becomes the narrative and its hard to undo the damage
ZD, that’s all true, but it’s not an excuse for people who should know better to unfairly bash our community as whole when a horrible story happens.
I don’t know why you think you think the seller has to offer free shipping; many don’t.
You don’t sem to be disputing my point, though, that the policies here aren’t specifically targeting “gemach” abuse (which is completely dishonest), but are severely curtailing all returns, even of new, unworn merchandise.
I have mentioned before that I sell online for parnassah. While I never heard of this company before and do not have such polices. Unfortunatly DY your plan doesnt work
In a regular Bricks and Mortor store, when someone returns something and it looks used or the tags are removed, you just refuse the return , However online its much more difficult as you are in possesion of the item and the buyer could file a chargeback via paypal or his credit card and even deny the tags were removed and there isnt much you can do. At least the item is in your posssesion and you wont lose more.
Ive been there were an unauthorized return was made and after discussing it with other online sellers, They agreed it was better to keep the item and give the refund otherwise not only could you be out the item, you could be out the money and the credit card companies and paypal generally are pro-buyer, not pro-seller
Is your experience with direct online sales? Ebay and Amazon may protect the buyer, but this is not through them.
Also, what you’re saying doesn’t seem to make sense. If not accepting worn items won’t work because the payment companies will back the buyer, the same will hold true for all of the other policies, as you pointed out yourself in your more recent post.
So I maintain that their policies may indicate a higher level of returns, but not specifically of worn items.
If they were worried about it being treated as a gemach, all they needed to do was make a policy that they only take back items in new condition with the tags on.
The fact that there are more conditions than that indicates that they are trying to cut down on all returns, including wrong sizes, changes of mind, and the item not looking as expected.
The news story is not necessary. The policy is on their website.
Wisey, the returns could all be legitimate, but if there are enough of them, it’s not worth it for the stores to allow them.
I agree with ZD and LU (I don’t know if the owner is correct, but I think she made a pure business decision).
Will she anger enough customers to not be beneficial to her bottom line? Who knows.
The coin deal we were discussing is not a scam, it’s an issue of possibly unethically taking advantage of an offer in a way which wasn’t intended by the one making the offer.
It definitely does not sound like the same one NC is talking about.
Kleenex, Scotties, Aspen, Silktouch.
The key is the guidance, which it does not seem that she has.
I will stand by my assertion that based on what we see on the CR, it is not a good idea for her to be doing kiruv except perhaps in a structured program guided by mature, experienced, responsible people.
I was responding to what I thought you were saying that there’s no m’kor to asser women gazing at men for pleasure. There is.
It would seem that the issur to look at things which cause hirhurim applies to women, but it’s not the same as what causes hirhurim for men. There is some overlap, though.
B”H. You had yourself worried there.
The sources were brought as response to you, not them.
I don’t think it’s good advice at all.
Who will be “m’karev” whom?
The issue is with women looking at men, not women looking at women.
I’m not getting why a ???? ????? would be underwhelming to you, when it’s quited by rishonim.
Just because one way in which the ???? ????? applies it doesn’t seem to be accepted (I agree), doesn’t take away from my point that it is accepted as a halachic source.
The eBay seller sent me the wrong phone so I haven’t used it yet.
First or second seder?
Chavrusa tumult was yesterday.
NCSY = Negiah Can Save Yiddishkeit
I DO NOT believe that the mother intentionally left the baby in the car
Then of what relevance is the fact that there were other children there?
Iacisrmma, I don’t need to dispute any of the facts you presented to assert that it is still far more likely that this was a case of forgotten baby syndrome than a case of a negligent (to intentionally leave a child under any circumstance) and ignorant (to not know the car gets dangerously hot) or worse, callous and unloving mother who doesn’t care if her child dies (not that you claimed this).
These are so unlikely, to the point of being preposterous, but my explanation (that she met her other children in the store) or Joseph’s (that she thought the baby was with the other children), or other possibilities are far more likely. The halachah us that we must assume the mist favorable, and it’s not even a stretch here under the circumstances.
Your disclaimer is very nice, but doesn’t explain why you wrote, “I really would like to be Hevei dan es kol haadam l’kaf zchus. I am sure the mother is agonizing over this. But you have a 13 year old and 7 year old with you in the store and none of you realize the baby is not with you?”, and why you keep focusing on the worst (and least likely) explanation, even if you’re uncertain. If you would like to be dan l’kaf z’chus (as if it’s optional…) the opportunity is right in front of you.
Health, it seems that she doesn’t even have the standards of the woman in your story.
Either way, I thought it was interesting that you have, since the time you started that thread, been m’varer your safek.
Pretty close. Read all of your posts.
Do you also believe all that the media has to say about Israel?
Sure, go ahead.
You’re really counting turtle?
Teshuvah?
I don’t see the toeles in associating the important safety issues with a specific story.
I also don’t think you should be convicting her in the courtroom of your mind based on a news story.
LU, when you visit someone in the hospital, you have to make sure they’re tznius. I you visit a non frum person, you can be mekarev them.
Sparkly, kavanah is not its own mitzvah.
LU, is it bein adam l’chaveiro or l’Makom?
j.j.
I wasn’t sure, after you took my turtle post seriously.
Sholom Bayis – priceless.
I didn’t write that, but I assumed it meant even if you think you didn’t take a child with you. Poor wording, IMO.
Bikur Cholim?
Janette Fennell, president and founder of Kids and Cars, a nonprofit focused on improving child safety around cars, recommends these 7 tips that every parent should follow:
1. Look before you lock.
Open the backdoor and look in the backseat to assure that everyone is out of the car (even if you think you are childless).
2. Keep something you need in the backseat.
Put your cell phone, briefcase, computer, lunch, ID badge, left shoe, or anything essential to your daily routine beside your child.
3. Travel with a furry companion.
4. Always lock the doors.
Even if the car is in the garage, keep the doors locked to prevent curious children from getting into the car.
5. Put the keys and fobs away.
Kids might want to play with keys and be able to get into the car without parents knowledge.
6. Have a plan with childcare provider.
If your child does not show up to daycare or school without prior notice, someone should call to locate child.
7. If you see something, do something.
If you see a child alone in a car, do not hesitate to call 911.