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brooklyn19
If a rich person has 12 children and then loses their money, should they give some up for adoption?
I don’t think this discussion should be discussed in a public forum. If someone has a shaala, they can ask a rav. This is a very private issue.
oomis, that’s so interesting that you put on a yarmuka at such a young age. My husband’s family puts it on from after the bris and I find it so interesting. It’s supposed to be a segula for yiras shamayim. Is this a common minhag?
“However, if you prefer not to talk about a subject, don’t assume the role of mashgiach and determine that noone esle can read what you don’t like.”
I dont get it. Weren’t we asked our opinion?
tzippi,
by the way, standard of living does not always reflect assets. (it doesn’t sound like that is the case here though)
Bored,
Who shops with a “personal shopper” and is “outfitted”? Not too many people I know!
Bais Yaakov maydel
I heard of that too, but I think they weren’t really shocking them. they were actors, no?
It’s crazy how people can do anything if you convince them.
“squeak, IIRC, he believes that the Torah is of divine origin, just not everything is 100% historical. That is a far cry from what you are saying. “
No idea who “he” is but whoever he is is a total SICKO and can’t believe he is being spoken about on a supposedly frum website.
I probably should stop coming here and not because of bittul zman!!
brooklyn19,
How bout no Lashon hara and no sports!? What a brainstorm!
(BTW, whoever says it’s not “as bad” as Lashon hara, fine, but are we opening a thread devoted to lashon hara?)
Bais Yaakov maydel,
“maybe we should focus our desires for explosions on people like those hamas leaders and followers…”
Do you think by focusing really hard, they will explode? LOL
Everyone, leave bored’s MOTHER alone. It is really not her business what her mother chooses to do. She should worry about herself, not her MOTHER.
“clothing that is a hard one, I started looking at sale saks and bloomingdales as opposed to a personal shopper or having outfits, so…”
hmmmmmm, seems worse than I thought.
brooklyn19,
I would not “flip out”. Don’t think your comments can cause such an effect on me.
so i guess you dropped out in 7th grade? no wonder…
To the rest you:
This place is totally and completely insanely wacked out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bais Yaakov maydel,
” i would say get rid of your user name, get rid of your membership on YWN, and if you dont, at least stay the way you were before; no posting, only reading.”
Well said!!
LOL
welcome back bym!
by the way, I don’t think we should be wishing e/o “happy new year”
bored,
yes, I agree with brook that you are definitely spoiled. What I find really wierd is that you don’t know it! There were certain things that I probably got more than I need and compared to some standards, maybe I was spoiled as well but I don’t think I had that sense of entitlement.
Realize that even once you’re married, as generous as your parents are, it will be you who will have to budget. It is very common for married couples nowadays to go to parents for shabbos because they can’t afford to by the food. Please keep that in mind.
As brook mentioned (yes, she does have a head between those shoulders after all), you have to make sure you are marrying the right person. You can’t say, “my dream is that he should learn but if it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t” because maybe he really can stay learning for a while and you can’t. Is it right to take somoene else’s dream and ruin it? And even if he does stay, you might be miserable! It might be painful, but you have to seriously think if you can do it. It’s a pity that so many people feel pushed to do something that is not really meant for them because that what is socially acceptable.
Also, why not get in more hours a week?
Please don’t take what I said above in the wrong way. I don’t mean to say these things to insult you. (I really don’t know you so you can’t take it personally) I just want to make you aware.
what is a zune?
postsemgirl,
I agree with you 100%. As I said, I was never really in that situation and I (am not a pro. Don’t know why I am getting into this). that’s why maybe he should get rid of it a little at a time but whatever he does should be 100%.
Let me clarify. Let’s say, he decides to remove his radio from his car and he travels an hour a day, for that hour he might miss out on a specific update or whatever and it might kill him but eventually he’ll get used to it. Whatever. Maybe no radio motzei shabbos and he can make up an activity with his wife to do instead. the best would be if he could “appoint” someone to “check up” on him but he might not want to do that.
So i don’t mean he should suddenly stop cold turkey but he has to be strong about it.
bored@work
Maybe start by cutting down now. You might say, why should I? But maybe you should. Maybe cut out your trip to FL and ask your parents for a portion of the money to put away for when you get married. If your parents are the type that will look at you funny, maybe tell them that you know they will be spending a lot more on you when you get married and you feel that you don’t need two trips in a row right now (you might feel pretty exhausted after all that traveling anyway…)
You mention that you need your clothing but it’s good that you have already. It doesn’t last forever and if you have a need to shop YOU WILL SHOP! Besides when you need maternity iy”h, that can be a big expense. Are you prepared to buy the bare minimum (2-3 tops, 1-2 skirts, 1-2 shabbos outfits)?
I think the only way to know is if you are able to cut down now. If you can’t than you won’t once you get married.
(The truth is, I am definitely living with less than I did before I got married but not drastically less. I never felt deprived as a girl but was not spoiled either. Also my parents gave us an allowance that we used to spend on all our “extras” so I think that gave me a little preparation for spending as a married.)
Hatzlocha rabba wherever life takes you. Keep in mind that when your bashert comes along, hopefully everything will just fall into place. Daven for siyatta dishmaya that you get the right one!
oomis1105,
You are definitely right. All the feminists may attack me on this, but it is just more natural for a woman to diaper a baby and wash the dishes as it is for the man to drill in a nail and build the succa. Of course you will always find people who are opposite but that is the nature.
In Mitzrayim the women had to do men’s jobs and vice versa and that was the Avodas Perach! But of course I do agree that both spouses should be equal partners (which does not mean they have to do the exact same things). Someone was just telling me the other day that when she had her fifth child (many years ago), she came home from the hospital 2 days later and was washing the dishes, making supper, doing laundry. She did not have any family who could help her. So she had no choice. I was horrified and was thinking WHERE WAS YOUR HUSBAND???
bored@work,
I think “Tzippi” can be voted in as “nicest lady in the coffee room” 🙂 (jk). I think she was just giving a few examples. She was basically asking, is it more chashuv to be in kollel with all the perks for five years or only manage for 2 but without any extras. Of course it could be the other way around as well but I think she was comparing quality vs. quantity. Am I right?
Feif Un,
Wow. thanks for enlightening us. 🙁
It’s good to know…
enlightenedjew,
I guess that’s why the goyim’s kids are turning out so much more emotionally healthy than Jewish kids.
PLEASE!
“In that I simply follow the gemoro that tells me to despise the “chet” (sin) and not the “choitim” (sinners). “
Can everyone leave this out of the discussion? why? Because no one is referring to the people (Choitim), they are referring to the chataim (sins) so why is this being used as an argument?
You are definitely right. I should probably be saying tehillim all day and not wasting my time doing silly things one of which is checking up the coffee room. hm.
In response to Oomis’s comment, first I want to say that I don’t really feel comfortable offering my opinion in this area because I am not sure what that is. I just want to say that my husband is learning and I am working (a not very fun job…) My husband happens to help me a lot in the house and I don’t feel resentful at all. If anything I always feel like I’m not doing enough.
charlie brown
No way jose! We need a lot more guesses first.
Do they have soft tissues in Ireland. JK (You probably wouldn’t know any more than me!)
the threads are still there. Why don’t you go back and read them?
bored@work
you mean you really want a husband that will learn but you’re nervous that when it comes down to it you won’t be able to manage it really? Do I understand you correctly?
SJSinNYC,
read it with sarcasm. it is true that that is the attitude.
jphone,
Off the top of my head, I think an other point that was mentioned was that the sports celebreties are not people we want to emulate or spend time talking about.
Maybe someone should summarize that pros and cons mentioned. (not me)
postsemgirl,
I understood that you meant that he wants to get out of it. But he probably so badly wants to listen that he is not doing enough to get out of it. In other words, he knows intellectually that he should just pull himself out of it and stop the nonsense but when he gets up in the morning he probably is sooooooo curious what is going on with the mets or the yankees (I so have no clue about sports, lol!) So he needs to take action not just cut down here and there. That is the only way.
charlie brown,
Wow, you’re still at it.
LOL!
dd,
The people living in those places are certainly created b’tzelem elokim but Frum Jewish people I think are also created b’tzelem elokim. V’hamevin Yavin.
yossiea,
I am reading way too many of your sick posts per minute. Enough!
aryeh.in.tenn,
I guess you’re really new here.
Any MO person who does anything wrong, they are not really MO.
Any yeshivish/chassidish etc person that does wrong it is because they are yeshivish/chassidish and that means that yeshivish/chassidish crowds condone their actions.
Before all my personal editors start on me, I know it’s idealistic not ideolistic. I just was getting confused.
mohelkadosh
Welcome.
Are you really a mohel?
Are you kadosh?
beacon!
uncalled for!
ya all!
you don’t know my husband.
don’t try to fool me.
asara b’teves (I checked a calander)
squeak,
I have no clue who you are referring to by edmund. I think there is an old book that my elementary teacher read to us (it was out of print even at that time) about a kid. I don’t remember the name but it was probably somehting similiar so I mixed it up.
bored@work
🙂
well maybe you can see what it means to be married and not have so much money… (and that is WITH being supported.) By the way, I hope you have a really good job because you seem to know how to live with comforts and yet you’re very ideolistic and don’t want to be supported. That is very commendable but keep in mind that it is not very possible to live off $1000 a month once you’re married. Most of it goes to rent and there’s food that needs to be bought and there will be other expenses here and there. Hopefully Iy”h there will be additions to the family soon after and you gotta have $$$. So just keep in mind, it’s good to be ideolistic but gotta be realistic as well.
my sister has an ipod and she has this kind of casssette that can be played in the tape recorder while connected to the ipod! So she attaches the ipod to the cassette and it plays in her car! Never saw something like it!
brooklyn19,
why on earth are you going to bed so early, before 3 am?
Do you have a cold?
SJSinNYC,
to be honest i only skimmed through your post. I was not reffering to modern as in technology. I was talking about the culture. about your last line, you may be right to some extent. I should really look into things before i post. and believe me that for every one comment i post, there are 9 more that i don’t because i’m not sure about. what i do post, i am pretty sure about and i do hear it from other people who are very knowledgeable. (a lot of times i know who originally said something but would rather not say because i did not confirm 100%) So feel free to disagree or agree with my posts.
brooklyn19,
I know what you mean but unfortunately for me, I can use it literally very often! I can’t help it!
Okay, come on, let’s hear more ideas for CCS. We are not announcing the winner yet!
You still have plenty of time.
as i wrote it, i realized i was mixing something up. forget it.
brooklyn19,
chas v’shalom!
squeak,
no, they should keep it on. I am LOL!!! THEY TOOK IT DOWN!!!
brooklyn19,
no, if you’d make a comment, i wouldn’t take it seriously enough to boost my ego. jk.
charlie brown,
LOL again! this time my husband hears me and he is asking me what’s so funny in the coffee room. He reads the news page, not the coffee room.
anyway. looks like the coffee room stayed open. Either he doesn’t really have a chasuna or there really is more than one moderator/editor.
so one sec. does that mean that that’s it with updates for the NIGHT?
yros,
I wasn’t trying to ask. I asked.
yossiea,
I just didn’t chap what you meant.
charlie brown
It sure has! Can we continue this way? It would do my poor self esteem a lot of good. But maybe we should wait till tomorrow. I am literally laughing out loud and trying to supress it so my husband doesn’t think I went nuts!
Thanks for taking notice of my need. It’s deeply appreciated.
beacon
You know someone like yros? I don’t!