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You are 100% correct on all counts!
Mark the date folks, because I don’t know when this will happen again, but I agree with TMB! 🙂
The Wolf
im sure you phrased that incorrectly, but of course nothing takes precedence over Halachah.
if dinai mamonis follows the minhag medina then that is becuse that is the Halacha
That, my friend, is either a tautology or, perhaps, a version of the “No True Scotsman” fallacy.
That’s not to say that it’s wrong, mind you…
The Wolf
In Jewish law there is no concept of Bankruptcy or Statute of Limitations.
Well, there is shmita…
The Wolf
I could be wrong, but I’m fairly certain that a korbon Pesach must be a male.
D’oh! Of course. It’s an explicit passuk.
The Wolf
I could be wrong, but I’m fairly certain that a korbon Pesach must be a male.
The Wolf
It is not the customary thing that you must tip a delivery man.
I guess not in your part of Cedarhurst. In my neighborhood, it is. We tip the delivery guy EVERY time.
The Wolf
I have LOTS of pictures (photos in RAW format take up a LOT of space) and easily ran out of HD space on my last laptop. That was my main motivation for getting an external drive.
The Wolf
Because if some other component other than the hard drive fails (the motherboard, for example), it will be much easier to retrieve your data to another machine.
In addition, your external drive is in a different location than your main machine. A small fire/leak may damage your computer but spare your external drive.
The Wolf
I’ve been saved many times, but never (to the best of my knowledge) by a bell.
The Wolf
ICOT – How can you ever withhold some or all of tip to a waiter, which you said you do, based on your own comment?
I’m not ICOT, but if I may take a stab at it…
The whole concept of a tip is based on social convention. In places where it is customary to tip, one should (perhaps is required to) tip for the service provided. If you’re in an area of the world where tipping is unheard of, you do not have to tip.
A part of that social convention is that the amount of the tip is based on the quality of the service. Anyone who receives tips understands that this is the way it is (or should be). As such, since it is a part of the same convention by which tips exist in the first place, I don’t see a problem with withholding a portion of the tip when the service is bad.
The Wolf
For starters, you will be joining the company of something very dominated by self-hating Jews, Jewish anti-semites, and Torah haters of all shades.
You know, she never indicated that her proposed blog would have anything to do with Judaism.
If she started a blog on cooking, photography, crafting, personal finance or any other subject, would she still be “joining the company of something very dominated by self-hating Jews, Jewish anti-semites, and Torah haters of all shades?”
How about a little “dan l’kaf z’chus” for your fellow Jew?
The Wolf
I have been a blogger for over five years.
I suppose the first question that needs to be answered is — why do you want to blog? Do you have a particular interest that you want to blog about? Do you have viewpoints that you want to express? Do you want to blog anonymously or under your real name?
Once you determine what your goals are, you should be able to determine whether or not you should blog.
You have to determine the reason that you want to blog. What type of blog do you want to have?
As for making money — yes, it’s possible to make money off of a blog — but you have to put a LOT of work into it. The amount of money I make off of my blog is less than $100 a year — but then again, I’m not blogging for the money — and therefore, I don’t put as much effort into my blog as others put into theirs. For me, it’s almost an afterthought and if Google closed down Adsense tomorrow, I’d still continue to blog.
If you have specific questions, I’d be happy to answer them here or via email.
The Wolf
I don’t know what is is about your and your posts, they sound generally like they’re coming from a very educated person. Are you?
Thank you for the kind words.
Formal education:
2.5 years of Bais Medrash
Bachelor of Arts degree
Currently going for an MBA degree.
Informal education:
Tons and tons of reading on lots of different subjects. I like to read, and do so a lot.
The Wolf
Oh, and you’re telling me that I have a “kochem v’otzem yadi” attitude?? That’s the biggest laugh I’ve had today. Considering the fact that I hold myself to be the lowest of the low, that’s a hugh laugh.
Just in case I haven’t made the point:
HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!
The Wolf
Wolf, you often say you are going to heck, this could be a real likely reason, lack of hakoras hatov, and kochi veotzem yodi attitude.
Excuse me!
*Nowhere* have I EVER stated that I am better than my ancestors. On the contrary, if you look above, you’ll see that I said that I was GRATEFUL to my parents and grandparents for their efforts in raising me.
How dare you insist that I made your point when I did nothing of the sort. I am NOT “anti-yichus” (whatever the heck that means). My point has nothing really to do with yichus — it has to do with taking pride in things that you contributed nothing to. If you’ll recall, I even made my point using the Yankees as an example.
My point is that I don’t understand why people take pride in (or feel shame for) things that they had no contribution to. While yichus COULD BE an application of that, it most certainly is not what it’s all about.
I happen to be a big proponent in family research and genealogy. I think it’s a wonderful thing when people research their family histories and discover their roots. I do it myself (yes, I have a subscription to ancestry.com). But that’s not the same thing as taking pride.
Don’t tell me I’m “anti-yichus” when I’ve expressed nothing of the sort.
The Wolf
do you have bad yichus then lol!
I guess so. I know some people here think I should be terribly ashamed of that, but oh well… I guess I’m not a proper “baishan.”
Certainly not the first defect that I have.
The Wolf
BTW, does anyone think that perhaps Madoff’s son killed himself because… he was Madoff’s son?
I didn’t say that it doesn’t happen. I just don’t see the logic in it.
If he wasn’t in part or in whole responsible for his father’s crimes, I don’t think he should have been ashamed.
The Wolf
TMB,
Why do you feel the right to be proud of accomplishments over which you had no part? Did you help make your famous ancestor a big tzaddik? Did you have some part in his gadlus? Is it through you that he’s such a great person? Did you, somehow, contribute to his gadlus? If so, then why would you feel pride over it?
Why do you feel the need to be shamed over things that, again, you had no part? Did you ask for an infamous ancestor? Was it your fault that he was infamous? Did you, somehow, contribute to his deeds?
Again, let’s try to separate being happy for something from pride in it.
The Wolf
I personally think you owe them an apology!
Different wolf.
The Wolf
You wouldn’t be embarrassed to mention that your father is David Berkowitz (Son of Sam), if that were the case?
No. I had no part in the murders, why should I be embarrassed because of it?
You wouldn’t be proud to mention that your father is Rav Moshe Feinstein, if that were the case?
No, because I would have had no part in his accomplishments. I would be happy that he is my relative (much as I might be unhappy that Sam Berkowitz is). But shame and pride? No. I only feel shame and pride for things that I am responsible for or have a part in.
I don’t know why you’re finding this such a difficult concept to grasp.
The Wolf
I am talking about an average paying job
I don’t know anything about Psychology, but I would imagine that in any field, you need to “start from the bottom.” As such, assuming you could get a job with a Bachelor’s and no experience, I would imagine that your first job would probably be below-average in terms of the going rates in the field.
The Wolf
give the op a break
It was a joke. I put a smiley on the end of my question.
The Wolf
Who cares? How about “whatever works for the couple?”
Seriously, if you’re going to start fighting over who pays for the date, then there probably isn’t much hope to begin with.
The Wolf
Basically the wolf gets his chance to tell his side of the story, to set straight what really happened with the houses made of straw, brick and twig. LOL!
I had that book when my kids were young.
As it was, I often took the opportunity to discuss with my kids the motivations of characters in books and stories. It was pretty much clear that not always was the “hero” right and not always was the “villian” wrong.
Stories are a wonderful opportunity to launch into discussions about right and wrong and gray areas in-between — even if you don’t agree with the outcome of the story.
The Wolf
Wolf – it is the same in reverse. I am proud of the affect of my beautiful upbringing that would never have been if not for my zaidas and bubbes.
Don’t you want your children to be proud to have you as a father?
There’s a very big difference between being grateful and having pride.
It would be wonderful if my kids were grateful for all the hard work I put in and acknowledged that it made a difference in their lives. I, myself, am extremely grateful to my parents and grandparents for all the love, time and effort that they put into me.
I would not, however, expect my kids to be proud of something that they had no part in accomplishing.
I had no part in shaping my grandparents — and I would not feel shame if they were horrible people (since I was not in any way at fault for that) — so why should I feel pride for the wonderful people that they are? It’s not through my efforts that they became so.
The Wolf
I wasn’t aware that the choice of condiment to eat the fish with or the brand was accorded the level of minhag. I guess you learn something new every day. 🙂
Do I have to be mattir neder if I want to eat my fish with horseradish one week (since I normally do so without)?
The Wolf
In situations like these, I always think back to the rule of V’ahavta L’Reiacha K’mocha.
How would I feel if I found out that my wait in line was just lengthened by fifteen minutes because someone came with two full shopping carts of stuff while I was waiting on line?
The answer is that I would not like it at all. It’s one thing to hold the line while you send someone to retrieve one or two items you forgot — the added checkout time is minimal — but in a situation where it will add “real” time to the wait, I can tell you that I would not like it at all.
And if I would not like it done to me, I don’t do it to others. End of story — regardless of whether it’s technically permitted or not.
The Wolf
Also – which hours are considered “at night”? Does “night” start from 3:30 and continue til 9? or is it literally a person that is in college just when it is dark outside? Meaning he learns in kollel the whole day and then goes to college at night as an aside – maybe 1 or 2 classes each semester.
It probably varies from program to program.
For me, it meant seder until 5:30, so I could make a 6:00 class. When there was no class (legal holidays, between semesters, etc.) then I stayed until the end of the day (7:30 or 8:00 IIRC — it was quite a while ago).
In any event, I can’t imagine someone going to college at night ending later than 5:30 – 6:00. There aren’t too many colleges that start classes at 9:00 PM.
The Wolf
It was the same with my wife and me. Wouldn’t you say, however, that your love has grown with time, or has it stayed the same?
Of course it has grown. It has to or the relationship cannot survive.
I think a lot of people here are using the word love to describe both infatuation and connection. Neither are “wrong” in their proper context. I feel that both are important.
I agree with this point as well.
The Wolf
Wolf – will you be proud of grandchildren’s achievments that you had no direct part in?
Possibly, since I had considerable input into the raising of their parents, which probably had considerable a considerable affect on their upbringing as well.
On the other hand, I had NO role in what my ancestors did.
Again, just to be clear — I’m not saying you shouldn’t be happy about your family history or cherish it — I do — but I don’t see it as a valid source of pride.
The Wolf
My personal pet peeve:
Don’t “drown out” your fellow posters by cutting-and-pasting huge blocks of text from outside sources, knowing the other party is not going to want to read through twenty paragraphs or more.
Instead, summarize the points made in the text and provide a link back to the original source.
The Wolf
I think there is a 9 month halacha on getting remarried after a previous marriage. Perhaps I am mistaken.
You are mistaken. The halacha is three months. The reason for the halacha is to be able to establish paternity of any potential children. Once three months have passed, it is usually clear if the divorcee/widow is pregnant or not and hence she can remarry*.
It should be noted that it’s not clear (to me, anyway) if this only applies to marriage, or if it applies to dating as well. In other words, can a woman who has been divorced/widowed for two months begin dating (with the understanding that she will not get married until after the three month period has passed)?
As for the question of the OP, there are no set rules. She should begin dating when it feels right to do so (subject to possible halachic restrictions as mentioned above). It’s really based on individual preference.
The Wolf
(*And yes, the halacha applies even in situations where it is well-known that the woman cannot be pregnant by her husband — age, her husband was away, etc.)
I still don’t understand this concept about being proud of something that you had no part in. Oh well, I guess it’s just me then.
The Wolf
Frumlady,
You could also use the story as a platform for further discussion. There’s nothing that says that you have to portray Goldilocks as a saint. You could discuss (in an age appropriate manner, of course) whether what she did was right, might it be okay under certain circumstances, etc.
The Wolf
.The FLDS has practiced polygamy for over a hundred years, and still do so openly without prosecution. The authorities can’t interfere with a religious marriage, due to freedom of religion, even if plural. They purposefully do not obtain multiple civil marriages.
Well, now you’re getting into technicalities, because the state doesn’t consider it a marriage unless there is a civil marriage. A religious marriage, according to the state, is no marriage (although it may become one after a while in states that recognize common-law marriage). Shacking up with a girlfriend (even if you call her another wife), even if you’re already married, is not a crime. If they would obtain a second marriage license, then they very well might be charged with bigamy.
But states sometimes do prosecute bigamy cases when a second (or later) civil marriage is enacted. In fact, is has happened at least twice in the past month (see links below). I don’t know if the motivation in either case was religious, but even if it is, it is still not a defense.
http://www.fox59.com/news/wxin-indiana-soldier-bigamy-120810,0,6798571.story
http://www.wqow.com/Global/story.asp?S=13648350
In the end, it doesn’t even matter, as I’ve already shown above that freedom of religion does not mean an absolute freedom to practice said religion.
The Wolf
A state prohibition on alcoholic consumption by minors which interferes with a sacramental requirement of the minor’s religion would be unconstitutional under the New York State and US constitutions, regardless of any provisions or lack of exemptions in the statutes.
I’m not certain of that. Freedom of religion does not equal an absolute right to practice. I’m fairly certain that you could not claim “freedom of religion” to strike down laws against murder if you were to kill an Amaleki. I’m also quite sure that the current fundamentalist branches of the LDS church cannot use “freedom of religion” to get out of polygamy charges.
The Wolf
UPDATE: From the Wikipedia page on Freedom of Religion in the United States (emphasis mine):
The “Free Exercise Clause” states that Congress can not “prohibit the free exercise” of religious practices. The Supreme Court of the United States has consistently held, however, that the right to free exercise of religion is not absolute. For example, in the 1800s, some of the members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints traditionally practiced polygamy, yet in Reynolds v. United States (1879), the Supreme Court upheld the criminal conviction of one of these members under a federal law banning polygamy. The Court reasoned that to do otherwise would set precedent for a full range of religious beliefs including those as extreme as human sacrifice. The Court stated that “Laws are made for the government of actions, and while they cannot interfere with mere religious belief and opinions, they may with practices.” For example, if one were part of a religion that believed in vampirism, the First Amendment would protect one’s belief in vampirism, but not the practice. This principle has similarly been applied to those attempting to claim religious exemptions for smoking cannabis or, as in the case of Employment Division v. Smith (1990), the use of the hallucinogen peyote. Currently, peyote and ayahuasca are allowed by legal precedent if used in a religious ceremony; though cannabis is not.