Always_Ask_Questions

Is there a Lakewood Chabad House? I could google, of course, but I’d rather ask 🙂

WSJ had an interesting opinion lately by some lawyer saying that it should be possible to argue first amendment: schools have a right to speak, but they are imposing their speech on students, and the cost of avoiding it, as coffee says – private schooling, moving – is prohibitive for most. If something like this flues through the current supreme court, this could immediately force a voucher system. Not sure how convincing this is, but more bizarre things were found in constitution emanations.

I think there is a difference between a unique non-observant individual who decided to join a chasidishe shtibl and gets special attention and needs to be fully “taken care of” and Chabad approach that brought multitudes to Yiddishkeit, some forming a large sub-community within Chabad or joined general Jewish observant community. None of these 2 groups need to marry an old-time Lubavicher to fulfil themselves (no they are ready to).

> Why do some places call their school for younger children “Cheder”

technically, it should only be if it fits in a room. Many old school did. I think in many places, a teacher would teach a class at his home, possibly with different ages going to different teacher. I am not sure how widespread this was, but I saw this described in several books, including R Kamenetsky’s biography by his son.

I wish we could re-adopt this system. It creates more competition – between independent teachers, rather than schools, and competition is envisioned by Gemora and later poskim as an appropriate approach to education (guilds and competition restrictions are generally allowed in business, except education and perfumes). So, you would then be able to mix & match a Chumash class from a litvishe yeshiva, a Tanya class from a Chabad Rebbe and a math class from a MO school. And reduced overhead.

Shimon, contract is not a modern concept. See: bris.

I recall reading direct quotes from Telshe Rosh Yeshiva in 1970s saying that most marital problems in his community are due to bochurim marrying too young. Not sure what his place/time numbers were.

Even chicken-heads get it – Tyson Foods reported going from 50% vaccinated staff to 96% in last several months.

Participant> The bigger the fight gets, the stronger the resistance,

Agree. The main goal of learning critical thinking is to be able to analyze data disregarding personal preferences. Talmudic learning does the same thing. Those who did not learn it obviously failed their learning, whether yeshiva or college, whatever their hats/degrees are.

Cruz, good question.

CDC says that 2 IPV polio shots give, gasp, 90% protection. 3 shots give 99%. They say they do not know how long immunity lasts (but I presume longer than Covid). Many other vaccines do not give full or long-term protection, such as flu. before COVID, there were NO vaccines for coronoviruses, despite many of them circulating. Several more differences:

1) Covid is currently circulating much more than polio did. Lower chances of encountering virus meant much lower chances of infection after vaccine

2) During polio times, the world was not so connected. People were not getting text messages that someone on another side of the world got hit by a bus right after getting a vaccine.

3) People were less educated. Now they are a little more educated and think that they can understand statistics even when they do not, or when someone gives them skewed data in CAPS: DO YOU KNOW THAT MOST SICK IN PEORIA ARE WITH VACCINE EVEN AS 100% of PEORIANS ARE
VACCINATED.

ujm > Do we need a 20th/21st century rabbi to quote whether and/or when we can wear shatnes

I mentioned a number of times that mitzvos bein adam l’havero change with times and culture. Kal v’homer bein adam l’ishto!

if you want a shatnes example – there are halakhos how to deal with a person who walks in the street and will be embarassed if he would have to take off shatnes clothes right there. I wonder whether this will be different if you are in Tehran or in a beach community?

CS, do they consider people who were MO but then donned a black hat also BTs, or there are easier acceptance rules for them?

From R Twersky’s “Dear Rabbi, Dear Doctor” p. 240, shortened
Depression in Jewish families is far more prevalent than realized. ..often kept secret [as well as other conditions],. choice is between shidduch with a family with a known case or the one that kept it secret [or other condition]. One father discussing this mentioned “while there are no cases in our family”. I had to restrain myself from saying “foolish man! I treated your wife before she married you!”
—
many opt not to reveal problem, some may claim that a posek told them so. Poskim I consulted said it is unthinkable that anyone would give such a ruling… vilolatin of “lo sonu”, do not deceive, and probably of lifnei ever.

if condition is not likely to recur, then maybe no need to disclose. If likely to recur, I can not see how info may be withheld. I asked several poskim to issue a statement about it. They all said – no need, as no posek will ever advise withholding.

A marriage which begins with violation of trust is headed for a trouble. He brings a case when a wife dicsovered her husband’s pills, who said his parents told him not to disclose. As a result, marriage survived, but in-laws were cut off from the family. In another case of wife’s undisclosed depression, beis din justified a get.

In case of a family member with a disease, it is a question for geneticists, one told me that information should be made available but should not serve as an impediment. Everyone has something in their genetics.

I do not believe that the shadchan need to be told. But when it becomes a serious consideration, after several dates, the only thing to do is to reveal

As far as others, ask a [posek]. My understanding of Chafetz Chaim that if someone knows important information, he is required to tell the other party even if not asked

> Why would you use a goyeshe doctor or plumber. There are heimish doctors, plumbers and sewer cleaners.

I think halakha is that you select the best doctor, and if they are about the same, go ahead select the heimeshe. There is often huge difference between good and average doctors. Also, if you patronize heimishe doctors without concern about their abilities, you will reduce competition and in the long term these doctors will have no incentive to become better doctors.

GH, just see how rich we became that struggles of previous generations are totally strange to us. But we are still complaining…

> two sisters applies to Maseches Yevamos could possibly be construed as a ben torah.

It used to be, a talmid chacham was allowed to hide knowledge of learning a particular maseches. Now, it leads to ridicule.

While there are certain mis-diagnoses, I think, mostly occurring in schools, as we discussed here before – there is no denial that there is a lot of denial in the community. R Twersky and others write about it, including hesitancy due to stigma on shiduchim, etc. Frankly, CR seems to be working in part as group therapy, maybe we should be recommending it in lieu of AA.

ujm > You don’t like the Halacha.

It is good to start with Sh’A for a historical review, but for issues relevant to people and modernity, you need to quote someone from 20th century, if not 21st

Shimon, I think I responded to your question: a country needs to limit movement to increase safety. So, they use priorities. Citizens allowed, others not. It is not so much that one is safer than the other, but they need to limit someone, and they start with outsiders. So, do other countries.

Back to welcoming – where does it actually succeed? Below are my observations that are limited to several OOT areas, so please correct me.

Discussion here was about elementary schools. I know that many Israelis and Russians send their kids to O- schools for K- and then go to public. In the 80s, early Russian arrivals in NY would go to O- schools until they earn enough money and get to suburbs with better public schools. I’ve seen some of those kids later at Chabad houses – they definitely did not become observant from that school experience, but some got enough background to stop by. So, partial, very limited success.

As to MO schools that have a mixture of observant and non-observant kids, I met many ehriche yidden who graduated from such schools, but all of them seem to have observant and knowledgeable parents. I do not recall meeting anyone whose non-observant family sent them to a MO school and they are observant now. This may be an observation bias, as I would have less chances of meeting such parents.

Seems like chabad houses on campuses have high success rate. Hillels to some degree.

Do we have places where adults can go. In most places, it is hard to imagine an outsider coming in and getting involved in a community. I quoted here a report from the 80s, where most newly arrived Russians were reporting that they were not finding their places in shuls. Do we meet all those Jews anywhere, or we just waiting for them to show up at our school doors so that we can verify their Jewishness?!

yid > In the place where Baelei Teshuvah stand,

this is why I frankly don’t like the word “kiruv”, a little snobbish implying you are better than him and trying to bring to the same place as you are. And you are in a perfect place already (I believe Chabad is not using this word and is able to do the job somehow)

Some Hosid was explaining to Gerer Rebbe that he is davening in a particular shul of baalei teshuva “although I am not one of them”. Rebbe replied – “why not?”

> Why is that less of a risk than allowing foreign tourists in?

All countries balance risk v. economy and voter satisfaction. Also, a country has certain obligations towards citizen. Every country does that, not just Israel. Practically speaking, you can hope that the citizen will go home and you can even ask him to stay home. The tourist will roam around immediately. Also, I believe Israelis returning from certain “red countries” are currently subject to quarantine.

Anyway, you can always argue on particulars of a particular decisions in each country, but that is why the countries have governments to make some reasonable decision, and you have a right to appeal to a court or vote in next election. You should not get too much upset every time you are not in a majority on an issue.

And, also, as R Meir Twersky wrote early on, politicians are bound by the desire to be re-elected, so Jews who value life more than economy and tourism should be more careful than they allow.

Shimon, all countries treat citizens differently from visitors for COVID. They need to manage risk and this makes sense. The best way for you to visit Ey might be to enter yericho from Jordan, or hang out on the other side of Golan or litani River. This way you don’t need to deal with gazlanim and you will not expose Jews to extra virus.

Not sure whether Spanish inquisition innoculated Sephardim against enlightenment, or it was just luck of geography. but note that expulsion in those times was not just mamon, but a huge risk to life also. I think also we can stop fighting enlightenment by now, it is not the same yetzer as 200 years ago. For example, Sephardim in USA don’t seem to flock to reform temples. Ignorance and Facebook seen to be more dangerous.

Avira, your reference to the furniture discussion matches the one I brought between Satmarer and Chazon Ish that yeshivas are the midbar away from negative influence. At some point, it is not fire or midbar any more, observant Jews need to look for the whole nation.

People here bring examples of confused people coming in.. by definition, if you stay inside, you don’t see millions of those who are getting lost. By some knowledgeable people, 4 out of current 6 mln Jews in USA are on the way to extinction. Definite statistics is that currently only 2% of Jews change denomination, the growth of O Jews is solely internal

I am confused how you ca marry before you can legally drink from the cup under the chuppah