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I told my kids our theme this year is “leave me alone, I’m making a bar mitzvah”
SWAT – I am a firm believer that the one who criticizes is the one who should make the first move toward repair, so . . . let’s see what you got.
Zdad – then those won’t be the stories I’m telling.
jbaldy – Mazel Tov!!
Syag- do you think it’s right if the schools open and some kids can’t attend because of the dangerous conditions? They’re going to have to make up the work that their classmates did and they miss the socialization that the other kids who attended that day get.
I’m not sure if you are even serious with this question. The teachers can review, do activities, play lots of different games (like jeapordy, around the world, tic tac toe) that use review questions to play. That’s what we did on snowy days (in my very modern, zionist, co-ed school) when some didn’t show, or on days when the flu was going around and lots of kids were missing.
My dad talks about a day when only three boys showed up for school so they worked on memorizing some of the after-brochos.
Hi CAD! Don’t see you too often anymore.
sm29 – agreed. I think I meant that but you said it better.
I don’t know what inspired you to bring this up at this time, Goq, but you are SOOOO right. I have many, many friends who suffered abuse as kids and it has damaged them until this day. We need to prevent the next generation from suffering.
amichai is right, I stress that no secrets rule to my kids and I once had to teach it to a well meaning Rebbe.
I don’t want to scare my (easily scared) kids but I do tell them that if they ever feel uncomfortable about how someone is acting with them they should trust their instincts and tell us.
Another thing I have done is to keep on top of who has been recently arrested and then popped right back into their jobs (and chaverim positions) so I know who to protect my kids from.
Lastly I have been trying to keep on top of which Rabbis support the molesters or try to prevent it from going public, and I keep away from them as well.
kfb – yes, as I typed it I knew that would become the point.
The Rebbe wasn’t “forced” to go, he could also have called in ‘unavailable’. The school was open to those who WERE able to go. And like I said, I’m all for a 4 day school week that ends each day at 3, but this isn’t about what makes me happy, I was trying to address your question.
iak – seriously? Is that an old prejudice that lingers on? I have no doubt many of the yeshivos had no such thought (even if some did).
In my city I heard people complain that if the school closed for a day, they want a make up day or a refund. And do you think the teachers want a make up day? Many would rather just open (I work in a public school where many made the same comment)
Trust me, many of the parents don’t want the kids home and resent days off. Many work and don’t have child care options. Many don’t have the patience, and many can’t stand watching their kids spend the day playing video games. Whatever the reason, don’t be so sure you can speak for them all(or any?)
The fact that rebeim get paid so little, in my opnion, does show either a lack of respect for the job or it correlates with the expertise necessary for the job. Even if it is important, it is not a highly specialized skill if the pay is so little.
not wanting to hijack the thread but I need to say that this statement is both false and sad. Sometimes the pay is little because people are poor, not because the job is not skilled.
Doesn’t it remind you of socialism?
Not really. I think that if a Rebbe is willing to put himself out for kids to have a more productive day that is very virtuous. Like I said, I personally prefer a day off, but that doesn’t mean they are wrong for not calling one.
I’m done when I find that people will keep responding to peripheral comments, or take apart and pick at words instead of addressing the topic. And If I’ve explained it twice and they can’t “hear” me, I usually will let it go. I may love discussions, but I hate arguments.
kfb – The yeshiva is open but warm inside. If you weren’t gonna let your kids outside that day, don’t send them. But if, like you said, it’s dangerous, then they shouldn’t be outside playing either.
I happen to like when my kids get a break so I let them stay home whenever I get an excuse to do so, but regarding your question, our kids school said that IF you have a safe way to get to school, please do so, otherwise stay home. The building was warm and they had extra space heaters.
The school “rewarded” the boys with a day of sledding when the weather warmed.
my mother died on the twentieth of Adar Aleph. Her yahrtziet was just yesterday.
not sure what dorms you are talking about, Ateres just redid theirs last year.
I don’t thin you can “relax” workwise at Ateres
was that a chicken joke? I think I’ve heard it.
why dont you check with the mod who gave it?
and I am not dispensing medical advice, I told people to call their doctors. you want people to just follow your advice as if you were their doctor. It isn’t about logic.
And I just remembered these hamster wheel conversations you have, tearing each post to shreds line by line. I’ll save you the time and trouble, I will click elsewhere.
but you aren’t a medical professional.
Rocky – stuff in bold is written by mods. They will edit or comment to you on you post. (Seems like it really was a bad joke)
You are the ‘someone on the internet’, the ‘many people’ are actually educated humans that I know in real life.
I am sorry you heard them to be saying that. They really said nothing of the sort. I don’t know if you went in with a preconceived expectations or if it is just a sensitive issue for you. I do wish you peace, however, because it is very difficult not to have answers.
Syag l’chochma: Well, why is it not my husband’s role to inspire me in MY endeavors, both personal and professional? Be a source of inspiration or comfort for the me so I can accomplish things.
Nobody said he can’t or won’t. Different people have different intrinsic roles. That speaks to what makes up their essence and what their natural strengths are. Ya know how you can have a friend who REALLY knows you and is REALLY great at helping you work things thru? Well if that friend was out of reach for a bit, and you had to work things thru with a different friend, nobody is saying that second friend won’t be able to do an amazing job for you, but there are differences between a good friend, and a friend who understands you thoroughly even before you explain things.
This is how I understand roles. There are different character traits in different people, and there are different core strenghts and abilities in different people. And just because women were created with a certain essence, that does not mean that each individual woman is tapped into that. Rabbi Tatz said there are feminine traits and strengths but they can be in a man or a woman.
For instance (example for illustration) – if it is accepted that empathy is more of a feminine trait than you may find more women in empathetic jobs/vocations/positions. But should a woman find herself not to be such a person, she may choose, for herself, quite a different job. And a man who finds himself to be highly empathetic may find himself among many women in a nurses station or special ed school. But that does not change the reality that empathy is a feminine trait possessed more deeply by women.
Does that clarify? I don’t believe I could ever do it as they do, they each speak an hour.
hakatan – here’s a baby step forward for you. ‘zionists’ are people, ‘zionism’ is an ideology. try choosing your words with more thought and less saliva.
squeak – love that skeleton joke!
One of my all time faves is:
An arab, a priest and a rabbi walked into a bar and the bartender said, “is this some kind of a joke?”
Rabbi Tatz and Rabbi Gottleib both have highly intellectual and thorough tapes on the roles of men and women. They are worth getting and listening to because they explain many things being discussed here. One of the things I would say after listening to those tapes over and over (I kept forgetting to bring new tapes to the car) was that the role of women that people here are calling supportive, I think is more about inspiration. The women don’t just support, as in, “Gosh honey, you are really wonderful. I am so impressed with you. Here, have a bowl of meatballs”, but rather they are the source of inspiration. They validate the good decisions and guide the indecision. They help their men (husbands and sons) stay on the right path and they urge them forward. They discourage them from giving up when they fall. It is much deeper than support, and it is no less crucial for the existence of a family unit.
The rule is check with your doctor before you let someone on the internet tell you that something many people deem unsafe is really a good idea. There are no exceptions to that rule.
I grew up two doors away from a shul. A Rebbe/teacher of my brother lived one block from the shul in the other direction. Every snow, my brother shoveled straight from our house to his Rebbe’s.
My neighbor snow blows the walk of an elderly lady down the street. And does the whole sidewalk in between (as a favor, not just to pass through)
When we and our neighbors shovel, if the other hasn’t, we do each others walks.
It’s your choice to be a stickler for letter of the law, or to be a mentsch.
Mazel Tov!!! (I was waiting for you to post so I could say that)
that’s cuz you davened for it on purim katan!!!!!!!!!!!!
HaKatan – it’s nice to know that your harshness and hurtful words are not intended to be such, but asking mechila without changing your tune does not fulfill the halachik requirements for tshuva.
“Do not put ointments, grease, petroleum jelly, butter, or home remedies on the burn”
from:
Fort Drum Medical academy-PATIENT EDUCATION HANDOUTS
First Aid for First-Degree Burns
lol, very cute!
but since my perceptions have already been deemed invalid how bout this, I won’t judge comments, and when people tell you how they perceive things, you’ll let them have their opinions. deal?
Hey Goq, does it have a blue straw? I thought I left it under a couch cushion but I guess not . . .
School always extends into the summer, doesn’t it?
My kid’s schools aren’t making up days, and the public schools have snow days written into the calendar every year.
The snow was beautiful yesterday. For a short while you couldn’t even see to the end of the block. Nothing a little 4 wheel drive and a cup of hot chocolate couldn’t cure.
Sorry oomis, before I can accept your complete authority over all my CR shailos I need some pertinent information.
How long is your skirt?
DY – yes, I think you missed something. Your constant vigilance in mediating all potential disagreements is highly commendable, but sometimes it seems you judge comments based on how you yourself perceived them. It seems there are others who perceive them differently.
you might want to check with a doctor before applying bacitracin to a burn, ointments and gels are not recommended as they can exacerbate the burn.
I think you will find some people’s self esteem in there, and some people’s dignity. But if there are names attached I’ll help you return them to their owners.
Anyone want to post some excerpts for us out of towners?
hodulashem – you should always work on your davening but I don’t think you should despair. Some of us are saying that we see the situation to be much less bleak for finding real, authentic, frum males with the hashkofos you speak of.
my ipad app (shlita) says 54 for Thursday!!!! And it says 43 for Wednesday but I was pretty sure it said something else this morning.
Assaf – I think it is very sad if you decide to read a handful of poster’s up and back and take any offense. There are other posters supporting you and hundreds of real life people supporting you.
Whether or not their hashkofos are right, there are more appropriate ways of having a discussion. But you really need to find a way to focus on more productive conversations or find real life people who can speak to you in real time. Pulling out these people and using them as an excuse to write the rest of us off means there are things that need to be worked through. Been there, done that.
Thank you for putting yourself on the line.
we are supposed to get 3-6 inches today, and then it is supposed to be 50 on Wednesday. Surfing anyone?
So did I, so I went to hotmail and made the same one.
SiDi – I hate to be a bearer of bad news. I was in your situation and was never able to extricate myself. Nor was my daughter or a friend (in CR talk I guess that would translate as, “NOBODY has EVER been able to get back in once that happens)
I find gmail to be impossible to contact other than just their troubleshooting forums.
like I said . . .