🍫Syag Lchochma

I wouldn’t want my kids exposed to interfaith activities. But then again I didn’t want my kids exposed to the Macarena either.

I have to tell you that I am so used to hearing about these types of horror stories about the people you least expect it from. It’s a huge secret in your eyes, but people who help kids like you are so used to it that they will have no problem focusing on you. And addictions can only be kept secret for so long before the bottom drops out, trust me.

Get yourself help even if you aren’t ready to speak. Ask for someone to stand at your side and wait for you to be ready.

YOUR FATHER’S AVEIROS ARE NOT YOURS! You need to not worry about what money you are using to live. Your job right now is to find someone you trust, write an email to Rabbi Wallerstein who used to be a crazy gambling addict. Tell JUST ONE teacher or counselor and beg their discretion. They will not be thinking about your family’s reputation, they will think about your pain and see if they can help. Or call an anonymous helpline like Yitty Libel or Shalom Task Force. Or even one of those people who works with OTD teens. Even if you aren’t OTD, they are prfessionals who can help direct you and they KNOW how to keep a secret!!!!

Do NOT give up without giving someone a fair chance to help you! Does anyone know you are cutting? Has anyone helped you in the past?

If you wash a vegetable and eat it without drying it and it transmits tum’a, is that a punishment or a consequence? I think people are confusing two different issues here. R’ wallerstein was not addressing the addiction aspect of gambling in this shiur. He was talking about acquiring money through inappropriate actions and using the money for Torah. I don’t think it is argued that Torah institutions are not supposed to take money acquired through inappropriate means (if only). This is because of the ‘status’ of that money. R’ Wallerstein was saying that all the Torah and mitzvos you buy with that money (he singled out gambling as an example only) won’t give you zchusim in Torah. Is that a punishment? No, it is just the way it is. Germs spread sickness whether you knew they were there or not, tum’a spreads as well, whether you know it is there or not. The spiritual world is as real as ours and follows rules and cause and effect, not knowing about it does not prevent it from happening.

You really have to hear the shiur to understand the context. A VERY simplified explanation is that when you do things you shouldn’t be doing (or that are assur, don’t remember exactly), any benefit you get is fed to you from the Soton. If you run a prostitution ring, the money you make wasn’t designated to you on Rosh Hashana, it came from the sitra Achra to encourage you to continue, so anything you do with that money is going to be tainted and you can’t get schar from it.

That is my SIMPLE version of what he said, he explains himself and sources.

We’ll good for you guys! You have no idea how strongly the books affect your value system, and staying away will make a difference in your lives for sure!

I really liked Yair weinstocks books because I love mystery, especially medical mystery and he draws you in to the story. I remember reading Gordian knot til 3 am cuz I needed to know the end. Of course there will always be someone who will tell you how awful al the books are, bleh, bleh, bleh but I firmly believe that when you are doing something difficult the obstacles will be greater.

Most of the big names are good. There will be an occasional bomb, just try a different author.

It was kinda funny. I was telling him ’bout the CR, told him there were locals online, some I know and some I don’t. Wasn’t naming any, just describing them. He recognized you and was all psyched. Wanted to get in touch and say hi. That’s when I told him to find a screen name.

That was supposed to say brocha.

Observanteen – don’t know if you will read this but I just want you to know I have been thinking about you/wondering how you are for all this time.

I think so. I am a book addict who gave up reading secular books ages ago. I have found a lot of books I like but I am always afraid to bring it up because it seems to draw lots of negativity and possibly L”H. I happen to like R’ Seltzers books a lot.

i’m not so sure ruining the story for everyone else was fair tho . . .

just sayin’

I work in the only district in Illinois that doesn’t celebrate Columbus Day (I’ve been told). We traded it for the Wednesday off on thanksgiving weekend.

sg – that’s funny, til you told her to get your name right, I hadn’t noticed that she hadn’t. I have been reading it incorrectly too.

Very funny

Assaf- may your sensitivity and kibbud av v’aim stand as a zchus for you, and may you find your happiness and peace within our people. May you be matzliach in maintaining your parents relationship through this difficult time.

Hatzlocha vebrocha

from me too

Maybe the frum world you’re in. Cuz where I live it’s not like that.

same here

Ben Levi – forgive me if I am wrong but it sounds like you are saying that YOU believe that the Torah/frum equate the two, (and that you bear resentment for it, for lack of a better phrase), but that does not make it so. Sometimes these false impressions are the basis of much disdain and I am sorry for who/whatever led you to believe that is so.

It would seem that the crux of the issue is this.

no, it doesn’t seem that way at all. Those kind of twists are very destructive.

Because if we were the same age living in the same, then smaller, town we may have bumped into each other on the swing at the park.

Torah – there are some who don’t use fake money on shabbos, and I have also learned that it can be used in games where one is paying but not acquiring (if I recall correctly), so monopoly would be out, but payday would be in. Masterpiece would be out but careers would be in. We actually had a version of monopoly that had wildlife habitats instead of properties and when you landed on a space, you would pay for their upkeep. I guess that would make it in.

🙁 My family spent hours and days playing board games (monopoly, masterpiece, payday, magnificent race, pente). We would sometimes play endless games and save the board and pieces under the couch til next time. My kids don’t really like board games and it makes me miss my siblings intensely. My kids disappear in legos instead.

Interesting. I wish I had that view. We made it thru a drippy kiddush and that was it and it was my feeling that Hashem said, “you want to sit and complain about Yom Tov, you want to complain about the work and the cost? You want to kvetch about taking off time from work because Yom Tov is so long? If you don’t appreciate the mitzvah of sukkah then you will forgo the priviledge of the mitvzah of sukkah. Go eat inside”

You have got to be kidding. How obnoxious and off the mark. That really stung and I must say I would have expected better from you.

sharp – oh no! are you baal Habooze?

Sounds like a rewording of the same op’s we’ve had a run of lately.