Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
😉
Just as an FYI to zdad- You would like to believe it is about stigma though posters are telling you it isn’t. I will throw in one more rendition for you: I only bought my kids shoes at payless. Only payless. Then, instead of lasting for 5-6 months, the average shoe lasted 2-3 weeks. I am NOT exaggerating. And they wouldn’t replace them. If I had money, I bought a new pair. If not, my child had a shoe with a detatched bottom that flapped around and let in rain. Then I stopped buying at payless.
I wasn’t exaggerating. I meant 10 years but I was referring to the parents.
I am thrilled that you were able to be home with your baby and wish you many more healthy years of it. I don’t think I will be able to give over the experiences I have and I get too emotional when people don’t understand how life really is for these people (my chisaron and I’m working on it) so let me just end off with a bracha that you never experience a year without shoes, clothes or extras for yourself or your kids, and may you always be on the giving end!!!
“an absolute financial struggle” and “live comfortably on one salary” don’t match up. These people haven’t gotten new shoes or clothes in 5 – 10 years. When they buy a pair of shabbos shoes it is because the holes/tears/scuffs on their other shoes make them unwearable even for weekday but they want to feel like they can do something l’kovod shabbos. You imagine yourself buying an “extra” pair of shoes. That is not a fair transference.
Nekama? Try tochacha. Try encouraging someone to be metaken his harsher side. Try asking someone to be kinder in his online conversations. You get it all the time from so many posters and yet you think it’s just me and it’s nekama? Wow.
WIY – we have thrift shops in my neighborhood that are stocked with all the clothes the local gmach couldn’t make room for. There are lots of decent things there but I, too, would feel sad if that was the only option for someone or if that was where they had to go for Shabbos clothes.
Zdad – do you ever shop at thrift stores or is that something you just want “them” to do? Which, btw, nobody called “offensive”.
zahavasdad – I think you have a poor attitude toward these things. Whether or not something is a luxury is not up to you. If sushi is cheaper is that a problem too? Do you worry as much about non-kollel families who may have things you consider luxuries? I may not disagree on your point, but I most certainly disagree with your presentation and very much disagree with the idea that you feel confident that your personal opinion of luxury vs. necessity is valid.
I get the feeling (though it’s a guess) that you have things that you have worked for and you don’t like that someone else should have them for free. Perhaps some of what you have is considered superfluous in my eyes and I would find you shallow and materialistic if I visited. Would that even be an appropriate judgement for me to make or is it correct to say that different people and their circumstances will decide what is appropriate for tzedaka use and what isn’t.
Trump lifestyle? Buying shoes that aren’t from payless is a trump lifestyle? Those types of exaggerations just help shed a bad light on something that is not worthy of the criticism. I buy lots of different things at thrift stores but not shoes. And either way, why would getting my kids one pair of shabbos shoes in a year be so offensive to someone? People who can afford it have several, not just one, so rest assured, they are still living a life of deprivation even with those “real” shoes.
So 100 women stay single til the men’s first marriages become null and void (for various reasons) and then go on to become second wives and live happily ever after. Why is this a problem?
apushatayid – agreed
mazal77 – I don’t think those were zushy’s thoughts, I thinking he was bringing forth the comments of the posters on the other thread and inviting a discussion.
Tried. Couldn’t get past a minute or so. With skipping.
WIY – We give vouchers to people in need to buy specific items from a specified price range at a store that has agreed to give us a discount. For example, a hat for $x at Yossel’s hat store. We don’t find that the store owners are always able to honor the voucher without being judgmental or annoyed, but we have reasons for who we give them to.
These are not the same as the school vouchers people purchase from their school office.
I was under the impression that Bloomburg did away with giving out pacifiers as part of the welcome package for a new baby. That doesn’t mean they don’t have one to give when you ask for it. Just don’t welcome the baby with it. Personally I think pacifiers are stupid though so you can have mine (they still give them out in Chicago).
95 – I didn’t read the other thread (I get too hurt by some of the misinformed comments) but I personally distribute tzedakka vouchers used for various clothing. Or were you specifically asking about shoes?
(and btw, thanks for your hishtadlus)
oh Health, stop finding fault in everything I do
****mazel tov notasheep****
thank you mod on duty for your split second modding!!!
very funny
Stop constantly looking to find fault in everything I do.
That has GOT to be the funniest thing you have EVER said.
It’s just the rule -there are exceptions to every rule!
other people would have said,”sorry”
What made the OP seem like a troll, I’m lost
people looking on a mixed blog for gyn info instead of going to imamother are probably not here with the best intentions. Either troll, or second grade humor.
Haifagirl – he’s a graphologist and he was able to glean that info from your posts
and he happened to have been the baal koreh!
I’m not sure that could be considered “evidence”. The question remains unanswered.
Perhaps there are hundreds or thousands of guys who have dated 5/10 years and are still single but no one seems to know where they are. Not shadchanim, not dating websites, not Rabbonim, not therapists, not the girls.
It isn’t any more possible to validate that point than to count the single people. When people say, “no one seems to . . .”, they usually mean, “no one of the few or many people who I bothered reaching out to”.
I never said anything about being outdoors. I asked you why YOU would want to go to some hick-town camp. As opposed to an East coast camp. I happen to live nearby and made the comment because that is how posters in the past have jokingly referred to out-of-town places.
and btw, I went to sleep away camp starting at age 8 every year through staff years. And for 10 summers we camped with the kids and slept in a tent (until the boys were too old to be in that environment).
Mazel Tov popa! How old will he have to be before she lets you speak with him?
🙂
and the game goes on . . .
(this is a continuation of a post that probably won’t go up)
Apparently? From where would you draw that conclusion? And how would you know if I love going to camp?
WIY – beautifully said. Thank you for making my point.
Wow! I can’t believe how much criticism you guys have gotten away with. Posters have gotten battered for so much less.
yacr85 – just wanted to mention that your analogy was very cool. I like your creativity.
Just a side, additional answer to your comment about covering the knees not being a comparable y”h – did you notice how many people are NOT covering their knees? Did you notice how many wives in kollel lives expose their knees? Did you notice how many rebbetzins expose their knees? Does this give you a mild clue to how strong that Y’H is for women who just CANNOT STOP THEMSELVES from exposing themselves inappropriately (I am talking only about those who know they should and wish they could).
For the women who think that wearing a skirt that covers the knees is comparable to the same Yetzer Hara (in this area) as men, picture the following.
If you gleaned that from my words then you didn’t understand my point. I don’t think there is a woman around who thinks that.
batseven – So you are trying to say that the woman’s commandments are equal in intensity to that of a man?
no, that wasn’t at all what our topic was.
Also, saying that your point came from Torah doesn’t mean it did. I cannot explain my point clearly in a mixed (or online, for that matter) forum so if anyone got it, great. If not, then not. But please don’t put words in my mouth.
Plus some people in the world like scenery and fresh air….its a shame you don’t…
what are you talking about?
I know. And it’s in a hick-town. That’s why I asked.
batseven, “And by the way, that is one of the reasons why men have soo many more commandments then woman (like yarmulke, tzizus, torah) etc. cuz they need so much more to keep them in check.
Very good point, and I use that point to disagree strongly. Did you ever look into the highly unequal level of commandments of tznius, men versus women? You may have been taught that this was for the man’s sake but that is not really the whole truth. It is for the exact reason you stated, cuz they need so much more to keep them in check. But “they” is also woman.
maarava? Why would you want to work in some hick-town farmer camp?
interjection – right on. But people don’t want to accept that because of the implications.
and the place here goes wild.
you’re the only one yelling
have a problem when they claim a halachic basis that doesn’t exist.
Had they handed that out in a flier to each guest?
major lol!!!!!!
squeak – I had that same chuckle
Sam2 – considering who she already has listed, you got nothin’ to worry about.
😉
Dr. B – I assume you speak from experience and have been to more than five shuls and have left the tristate area. Often the ,”everyone” comments are based on someone’s backyard, their frontyard, and whoever else’s yard is within viewing distance.
And the mosques and churches you spent time in must have been very surprised to have you as their guest. Perhaps the silence you experienced first hand was them being speechless regarding your attendance.
Just saying
Mazel Tov!!
I know it isn’t great but I didn’t want you to feel bland. It can be temporary til you think of something better 🙂
how about”postersheart”?
I have gotten a few letters from chase telling me attempts were made to access my account from a different computer than I usually use. They wanted me to verify if it was legit or not. The only problem was that I don’t have a Chase account.
nfgo – thank you for answering so calmly. I think I was too appalled to be that civil.
Morah Rach – thank you so much for posting. You are right that telling someone to force the girl to stop would be useless but the impression that I got was that people were saying she should tell someone who could work on getting her the help she needs. Whether or not you lose her as a friend is irrelevant. Someone trustworthy needs to be informed so that they can monitor the situation, even from afar, because it is life threatening. And just like with addictions, not knowing they exist often brings people to give the wrong kind of support. Nobody can make her get help before she is ready, but keeping her secret is a dangerous idea. Someone safe and effective needs to be informed.
I once called a pediatrician because I knew he knew the family dynamic well enough to know what to do next. (He couldn’t respond to my information but he was allowed to listen)
Baruch Hashem for your little one, may you be blessed with many more!