Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
definitely red
woah Geordie – I don’t know why I was surprised to see that post coming from you.
As the question was about whether or not a person refers to a lubavitcher when they say chassidim, I wpuld say absolutely not. I live in an area with a strong lubavitch presence and based on their dress, lack of familiarity with gedolei hador, segregation from Jews and Jewish activities, and seclusion from the general kehilla among other things, it never in a million years would have occurred to me that they were chassidim. Not only that, but I find it shocking that they would consider that offensive. Why do you care what my perception is? Especially when you live on my block with 8 other frum families and don’t let your children play with any of our kids? The whole premise makes no sense. If you are concerned that people you don’t speak to should know more about you there is probably a really simple solution to that!Why don’t you just look it up?
this issue resurfaced specifically because of this new event. So if you feel strongly about the feminist cause and supported HIR for their acknowledgement of women in these roles knowing there is rabbinical backing, that should not extend to this situation on any level. Is it possible to now acknowledge that this shul has turned it’s back on Torah or is the loyalty to it going to cause some people, unfortunately, to extend leeway where it doesn’t belong?
golfer – you are so right. Not only would I not want to be spoken to that way, but my husband wouldn’t even try it. If he wanted me to improve on the level of tznius of my clothing, I would imagine he would probably phrase it very differently. Perhaps he would say that he was working on his shmiras einayim and he knows it is his issue, not mine, but would I be willing to wear shirts/skirts that would help him with that goal. maybe.
Zdad – I understand what you are saying, and I think it is great when you try to advocate giving room to people instead of taking a harsh approach that may cause them to fall farther away. But you have to understand that giving people room and sparing the stick is not possible when Torah is being violated. If you are telling people not to be so harsh because you know Torah is truth and you don’t want people to give it up than you are right. But when you start posting that we have to use the carrot approach and not the stick when it means allowing people to do things that are unquestionably AGAINST Torah, then you are not really supporting torah at all, you are just supporting liberalism. No matter how accepting and positive you want to be, and I am almost always with you on that, you are not allowed to give a green light to breaking actual Halacha for the sake of peace (except extenuating circumstances). Your love for peace should not be more of a priority than your love for Gd, even though some kiruv professionals say to do so, it is not proven to work. The people you are protecting will see hypocracy. there must be an ultimate cause that you are fighting for.
“I don’t see why the rest of what I wrote changes or detracts from that.”
because you said “but”
and (as usual) the more you dissect it the harder it will be to retain either what you actually said, or what I actually referenced so I’m not playing along.
gavriel – I cannot imagine what you can possibly be confused about.
zdad – in many cases you are correct. To turn away people who are doing things differently runs the risk of turning them away. But in this case you are very wrong because the shul is participating in different things that are absolutely against torah. Period. when a shul decides they will allow someone to wear a baseball hat on Shabbos instead of a kippa, that is not the same as this and for someone to attend such a shul because they like the davening, is to be just too liberal, open and accepting. there is a point where we do have to stand up for Halacha and not just embrace everyone around us. To do that, would be to stand for nothing.
not true. your answer to whether or not halachically permissible sheitels are accrptable was that tichels aren’t either. that is just an answer we give when we don’t want to be wrong so instead of saying so, we say that the other guy is also wrong. irrelevant to the question asked.
oh joseph, no two such people would ever be friends!!
I was so horrified by that whole mazel tov. then I got to the part about bayis neeman and couldn’t even fathom what was goin thru their minds when they typed it!!! Thanks for giving a suggestion of something we can do about it.
I am also eagerly awaiting a post from Joseph putting both of you on the same side of an issue!!!!!!
🎉🎉🍾“2) I’m told they’re rare today as well”
not at all“There’s no question in my mind that some shaitels are not tzniusdik, but neither is every tichel, or any other article of clothing, always tzniusdik”
?? so if you ask me if my snack is kosher I should answer that my coworkers snack isn’t kosher either?“Read the earlier posts –”
no thanks, sorry. WAAAY to long and redundant” – – no one is defending immodest sheitels.”
Baruch Hashemare the people here that are defending the halachik right to wear sheitels also saying that there isn’t a problem with the sheitels being worn today – (specifically those more than halfway down the back, skin colored parts, falls exposing the very front hairline)?
she has already mentioned she is a nuclear scientist in north korea
woah, what are you guys drinking?
Joseph, I can’t be your wife because even though I spend my days barefoot in the kitchen raising children to be subservient to their parents, I wouldn’t live in NY for a million dollars.DY – seriously twisted. totally not my style to sock puppet myself. and I have never,in all my posts about not wearing sheitels, spken out against those who wear them. I would certainly not be so demeaning to people following daas torah. get a grip. or better bifocals or something.
sheesh.
do you even bother reading posts before commenting on them? where do you come up with this stuff? latest alias?
“Thank you Yeshiva world for your tolerance of my posts- this topic is usually not very well received no matter how long our short the message is- no one likes to hear they might be wearing something immodest”
no, no one likes to hear people talking non stop in your face, harshly and condescendingly with no Halacha backing you up. What nerve you would have to tell me I cannot follow my rav. What kind of agenda are you running there? We should go rabbi shopping? What business do you have telling people in such unkind manner that their posek is an idiot or is just ignorant or that you should not follow him. Why in the world would you think that it is appropriate to speak to people that way?
How sad that you want to increase tznius but have chosen a method that belittles and goes against what the Torah asks of us, namely, following our rov.
dancingmom- here’s the thing….Whether you are right or wrong, nobody will give you the time of day if you will write exceedingly long posts with soapbox screaming in people’s faces. Either change your approach, or give up the fight. Is your goal to scream a lot, or are you actually hoping to educate people?
And I thought she meant that it’s okay to put yourself in that position because your health is more important – and an implication that there is nothing wrong with it because we have developed ourselves so efficiently that many of the halachos barely even apply to us anymore. r”l
“I’m wondering if Dancingmom is one of Joseph’s aliases.”
Perhaps and intern?
hypocrisy, you wear it well. If sitting on a kosher website isn’t apples from a toilet bowl then what is.
Nobody is attacking. Having a conversation, even a disagreement, is not an attack. It has happened here that your use of that phrase when people have disagreements with you causes people to back off and stifles them. Perhaps you could read those posts again very carefully and see that a disagreement is not an attack, and people should not, c”v feel too intimidated to respond.
Coffee Room FAKENEWS
wow. took me so long to type that everyone said what I was gonna say
🙂Please, Please use her proper Hebrew name!
Obviously just stating my opinion but I have to tell you that we had a couple situations where we needed to use headstones to determine names and parents names and nobody around knew enough to know Yankele was a nickname for Yaakov. My moms brother was Marv – his “jewish” name was Yosha Maisha. His children didn’t know that Yosha Maisha was a Yiddish pronunciation of his given name, Yosef Moshe and put the Yiddish/nickname on his stone. Some of these relatives have used these nicknames for their children thinking they are proper names.
It is one thing to put a Yiddish name if that is the given name, but a nickname or Yiddish pronounciation should go in quotes.
We also had trouble finding my mothers father’s name for her own matzeiva because his stone had been made with the same process.I only got through one post but the irony of this line just jumped off the page:
“And you are overstepping your bounds when you criticize my posts without having read them carefully (and in some cases, haven’t read them at all).”
Is it overstepping bounds to tell someone whether or not they read something?
Phil – thank you so much. I am very grateful for your defense. I only read the thread sporadically and didn’t recognize your kind gesture.
“She has a sordid history of making such accusations not only against people who are acquitted of them but even against those who were never charged. It is her modus operandi in pushing her agenda against frum Jews, who are inevitably her victims of false allegations, as anything alleged against gentiles she’s suddenly all skeptical about. Unfortunately this is part of the remnants of her being raised in an MO family where Chareidim are looked upon with disdain, suspicion and much worse. She never fully let go of these sad hashkafas.”
Can’t believe I missed this earlier. You are a liar Joseph, a straight up liar. Your theory is trash and you, sir, are s very sick man, if even that.
“Syag: Please also tell him that the Rambam (Hilchos Ishus 13:11) paskens that he should permit you to go out once or twice a month to visit your parents and/or friends, not just call them.”
oh thanks soo much! I will let him know. unfortunately, right now I am homebound, recovering from a complication of the minor surgery to have the gps chip and body cam inserted in my forehead. But I will surely let him know because they happened to be residing just outside of har nof, har menuchos to be exact, and I would love to pay them a visit.
“Syag: Your above sarcasm seem to be derisive of what the Halacha states.”
out of context, perhaps. but I would bet that most here will understand it as the response to your interpretation/presentation/attitude toward the mitzvah that it was.
“The one exception in halacha cited in Shulchan Aruch is a wife is required to obey her husband before her parents, hence on that basis a married woman is exempt from Kibud Av V’Eim unless her husband wants her to obey them.”
Oh so true Joseph! Thank Gd I am married to a wonderful man who allows me to call my parents on their birthdays every year and honor them by cashing checks they send.
🙄🙄🙄
or do the suggestion I made above. (I should have stated so specifically but I was referring to bracha acharona as well)
If you have a food with an unknown, the best thing to do is find two other foods to make brachos on, that cover the possible brachos of the food you had, and include it that way. So if you have cheesecake that may be al hamichya or borei nefashos, eat some mezonos and some shehakol and have in mind that the cheesecake is covered. It is best not to forgo a bracha at all if you have a means of making one.
just smile – my 2 cents —
I took on c”y 3 or so years ago because I wanted to offer Hashem something very huge as a zchus for something important. I knew it would be very difficult and it has been. Not the milk or milk products per se, but the availability and the ability to nosh on candies and bought cakes at work and in meetings that were very frequently OU-D. Although I still mourn the loss of ice cream, I have found quick and easy recipes for peanut butter cups and kit kats. I have yet to find a replacement for m&m’s but I even bought heavy cream and made my own ice cream and whipped cream this summer.
Having these ‘stand ins’, coupled with the knowledge that I have grown and accomplished is very comforting. Since comfort foods are so much about emotion, why risk feeling awful about “giving in”.If you really need these things to get you thru some rough stuff, you will obviously need to work that thru from the halachik angle, but emotional strength brings comfort. And since comfort is a state of mind, perhaps there is someone or something you can couple with a different but similar food that can accomplish the same thing.
Either way I wish you strength and recovery and clarity and comfort.
Tantruming is a way of bullying people into giving you what you want. And when it is deliberate, as opposed to a sensory meltdown, for example, it is unquestionable a bullying tactic. It is just easier to get away with not being identified for what it is.
” That Syag was dismissive of the fact that Gedolim support the protests by writing them off as fanatics. (I had used the term too frum.)”
too many pronouns to know what you are trying to say but distorting my words is a profession for you and I don’t appreciate it.
I couldn’t have been dismissive of the fact that Gedolim support the protests because they don’t. I did not write anyone off as fanatics, that was the wording of your choice for the example you made up with no particular relevance.
My comment was that it was a stupid question. You are asking if we would follow a gadol who tells us to act disgusting toward other people and break many many mitzvos bein adom l’chaveiro. That would never happen so its just a dumb question.
For you to TWIST that into me calling the gedolim fanatics , ch”v, is yet another disgusting ploy of yours. That people are surprised that someone like you who supports wife beating and hitting children, slapping students and supporting molestors, unless they are caught in the act by a complete Sanhedrin, is beyond me. That anyone who looks at violence as a standard mode of communication should call these protests anything but civil is no chiddish.
TLIK has it right on the mark.“interjection
thanks for not answering the question. Yes or No?”
Seems like civility in general is an issue for you.
oops – almost answered the question! Then I remembered being trashed last time I tried respectfully participating in one of these side bars.
->Just explaining so I don’t get accused for anything when I don’t show up this time to respond<-
“Yes, that’s a much better word, thank you.”
you were thinking that supported you?
you must be kidding. Joseph’s question is ridiculous. It isn’t because people aren’t comfortable with their level of devotion to Hashem or they just don’t want to acknowledge what the Torah asks of us? Joseph question is insinuating that there would be a rov of the status of a gadol who, with all his wisdom and siyatta dishmaya would order this type of behavior and IF such a crazy thing was true, would we follow it. OF course everyone opposed to these behaviors would do anything our gedolim say, but just like in that stupid, ‘can I beat my wife on shabbos’ question, you are pretending to be concerned about shmiras Shabbos while behaving like a menuval.
beautiful, beautiful answer. thanks
“bk613, putting aside your mischaracterization of the protests, if you are presented with unassailable proof that Gedolim called for these protests, what will your reaction be? Will you denounce those Gedolim shlit”a?”
that is one of those dumb “Rabbi, am I allowed to beat my wife on Shabbos?” questions
Hi nisht – good to see you!
I have driven to Minneapolis and Indiana since this post started as well as 25 miles up and back locally to buy pop (v’hameivin yavin) and the left lane is used as a driving lane as well as a passing lane. You can stay in there forever, just do it quickly.
it seems there are two different things going on here. The OP asked if he is heartless for his response to the campaign, and people are responding about whether or not we need to support someone who lost everything, or use tzedaka for valuables. And then a post about not being judgemental.
The issue of being heartless for not seeing the worthiness of the cause – I do not think you are heartless at all. I think that if the campaign was about a person who was mugged who felt bad he lost his gold watch because he knew how much it cost his in-laws, my guess is you would have cared. Your “problem” (mine as well) is that you are being asked to give money to someone who was traumatized and injured so that he could, seemingly, appease someone who cares more about his own investments than his future son in law.
There is no reason in the world that that request shouldn’t put you off. And it is not judgemental to think that such a mindset is disgusting. We are allowed to judge behaviors, and this one is wrong. Deciding the shver probably didn’t even care that he was in the hospital would be judgmental. Deciding that the guy is marrying in to a heartless family is judgemental. Deciding that there may be some serious red flags is not judgemental but a logical conclusion… if this is a true story. We don’t know who these people are, and we don’t even know if it’s true or if it was just poorly worded. Discussing feelings evoked by a narrative is not just appropriate but necessary for perspective and growth.
If this is indeed a necessity of the shver, and not just something the chosson wants to “give back” or the poor wording of the author to mean that “all is well again”, then I agree that that is tragic. But if it is not really the shver’s concern, but rather the author believed that this wording was the only way to make it matter to klal yisroel and touch them in a way that would make them give…..well that would be even worse.
👌👏😊
“Why must ye tell others what to saye? *Cough* ye *cough*”
wondered the same thing as ye“So what is all this supposed to accomplish again?”
what? you don’t understand football?
I’m so with you on this, I was just fuming about it last night. When i first heard about this whole kneeling garbage i said if you want to be unpatriotic, that’s your right, BUT NOT WHEN YOU MAKE MILLIONS REPRESENTING AMERICA ! So now trump says badically the same thing and everyone’s going crazy supporting them!! Nobody is willing to accept the truth of something if Trump says it.
Fire them!!
😤😤😤😤😤😤😤