AviraDeArah

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  • in reply to: Get Over Ended Shidduch #2047166
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    It’s really sad that no one is being the least bit sympathetic; shidduchim can be very painful; it can make a person feel rejected.

    in reply to: Gut Shabbos vs. Shabbat Shalom #2047165
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Gadolha; I don’t think many litvishe react negatively to a visibly sefardi yid saying shabbat shalom, especially if they have a aefardi or Israeli accent.

    I share the consternation that many have with ashkenazi jews using the American sefardi-esque pronunciation that takes the chisronos of both the ashkenaz and sefardi pronunciations, attempting to make Hebrew as easy as possible. Most MO people are ashkenaz and should be differentiating between a hard/soft tav, komatz/pasach, tzeirei/segol and others.

    It’s also frustrating to see people sound the same as irreligious jews who went to hebrew after school programs.

    in reply to: Writing on Paper #2047162
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    There are times that I feel I need to become reacclimated to a pen – the vast majority of what I write is electronic; grading papers is one of the only things I do by hand.

    in reply to: Kollel life with no parental support #2047161
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Torah mitoch hadchak; you’re one of the pillars of the world – you have one of the biggest bank accounts in shomayim that’s possible. Ashreich vetov lach!!

    in reply to: Get Over Ended Shidduch #2047065
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I’ve been there several times, and it’s not always as easy as “well they weren’t your bashert, so be thankful and move on!” which conbines the oft quoted attitudes of the previous replies. There is a lot of pain in uncertainty, a spectre of “is there something wrong with me?” which if allowed to fester can be very harmful. It can also make you gunshy, because you might think “I thought everything was great the last time, and look what happened!”.

    In my experiences, it’s usually something simple that the other side determined to be a deal breaker; something they needed on their checklist which wasn’t met. Sometimes there are facets of a person’s personality that the other side determined would bother them too much. Not giving a reason for them is preferable to having to say something potentially insulting. There can also be an exterior reason, such as a family member acting irrational (this happens quite often) based on some hunch or intuition.

    Your “radar” isn’t out of sync; men and women are extremely different, and women are often very good at concealing how they feel about something or someone. There aren’t always signs to read or cues to pick up on.

    in reply to: “Frum” therapist #2046416
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    **that should have said “paternal”, not patriarchal; indirect exposure to wokeness got into my head apparently

    in reply to: “Frum” therapist #2046406
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I disagree with the poster above who said that rav moshe’s psak would not apply to “heintegeh” therapists. While it’s true that therapists were more patriarchal and directive in previous decades, and would impose their beliefs on their patients, the issues aren’t limited to such extreme problems. As rav moshe wrote, they will advise *sometimes* to violate something – anything – in torah. Even if the therapist is very supportive of the personal beliefs of their patients, there are a ton of pitfalls in which a therapist who means well can damage a client. Imagine a client is beset with guilt over aveiros, and says he wants to give up and just keep doing them, the therapist will feel it’s healthy to encourage them to engage in aveiros that the psychology field would consider healthy. The therapist might suggest watching a movie to destress. He might validate hashkofa problems a client has and encourage them to “find their own way”. These are but a few examples.

    in reply to: the most delicious food ever #2046098
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Common; this is one of the rare times that we are on exactly the same page – very good post!

    in reply to: the most delicious food ever #2045883
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Gadolha, definitely – the tanya makes note of that in perek 5 (i think), where he differentiates between secular pursuits that are leshem shomayim (which include what you mention as distraction/mental health) and those which are not

    in reply to: the most delicious food ever #2045834
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Gadolha, check out the lashon of the chinuch (brought in the mishnah berurah lehalacha) ובכלל זה שלא לרדוף אחר תאוות העולם הזה כי אחריתם רעה וכדי בזיון וקצף mitzvah 387.

    Biur halacha, siman 1, on the 6 mitzvos temidios –
    והקובע את מחשבתו בעניינים הגשמיים ובהבלי העולם שלא לש”ש רק להתענג ולהשיג כבוד ביטל עשה זו ועונשו גדול

    Neither source seems to indicate that the issur is only when one loves the other thing more than Hashem.

    The chinuchs second piece in the same mitzvah – , כלומר שהוא רודף אחר תאוות העולם כגון שהוא משים לבו תמיד להרבות תענוגים גדולים לנפשו מבלי שיכון בהן כלל לכוונה טובה, כלומר שלא יעשה כדי שיעמוד בריא ויוכל להשתדל בעבודת בוראו, רק להשלים נפשו בתענוגים, כל מי שהוא הולך בדרך זה עובר על לאו זה תמיד בכל עת עסקו במה שאמרנו.

    This seems to say that the issur is when one is תמיד, which is relative – an argument can be made to say he means like you, but I’m not convinced of it. Tamid sometimes means once a day; here it can mean the same thing – the main thing is the kavanah; if someone natural enjoys food; gezunterheit, just don’t make a huge deal over it and make big plans as to how to enjoy the most that you can.

    in reply to: the most delicious food ever #2045703
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    To ujm’s point; one who cultivates a love of the pleasures of olam hazeh not for Hashem(as in, not for shabbos, y”t, simchas) violates lo sasuru, and an issur asei of veahavta es Hashem, because he’s loving something else… The sefer hachinuch writes this and ends off “veonsho gadol”

    in reply to: Teachers salaries #2045696
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Ubiq; teaching is probably the most time consuming job possible – you always take your work home with you, and spend hours preparing…you don’t just walk in like a regular 9-5 job, do your work, come home to a supper, daven up a daf yomi and fo to bed.

    Due to the low pay, having the sunmer “off” is quite far from a vacation; all rebbeim have to take summer jobs.

    I’d much rather a system where rebbeim have to work in, say curriculum development over the summer and get paid decently than the way things are now.

    If anything, it’s your post that is entirely making things up, casting chinuch as an east street profession – I find it insulting as someone who is in the trenches, constantly dealing with parents, lesson plans, grading, planning events and much more.

    What I said isn’t “against the gemara” any more than is the cherem of rabbeinu gershom – yeridas hadoros happens, practicality has to be changed to reach the same goals. You’re probably fine with women learning gemara because “times change” even though the gemara is against it – there it’s changing not lishma, and here it’s changing as ais laasos lasehm heferu torasecha.

    AAQ; most who go to work don’t go off, but a significant amount do, and a much bigger amount have a yeridah. It’s kind of the opposite of the situation of the gemara; yechidim can stay very strong while working, while most develop spiritual deficiencies – of course they were already having problems, but being in kolel would have held them back from many things. I’m talking about what I’ve seen happen to my friends who left Yeshiva early – I’m not talking at all about yungeleit who go to work after 5 years in kolel; almost all of such people I know of turned out fine, albeit a drop less idealistic.

    in reply to: Teachers salaries #2045681
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    It has a multi purpose function; it definitely produces klei kodesh etc, but the reason why it’s encouraged for everyone is what I said above; this is based on conversations with numerous gedolei yisroel over the years.

    in reply to: Teachers salaries #2045499
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    AAQ, currently a great number of those who claim to want to follow rebbe yishmoel go off entirely or partially in trying to do so, while almost none of their learning counterparts do.

    The kolel system is meant to maintain frumkeit and produce jews who are yodea sefer, on the level of baalei batim of previous generations

    in reply to: Teachers salaries #2045502
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I was close to a certain tzadik who was not rich, but ended up on the list of gevirim that meshulachim would visit. He said that he ends every month with about 1/5 left of all the money he makes from his positions in kashrus and his being a rosh yeshiva. I’m not mentioning his name because he didn’t want it to be publicized.

    in reply to: Teachers salaries #2045495
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Ujm, are you saying that it should scale based on income – that rich people should give a higher percentage of their income than others? Where do we find that? Chazal say to give 1/5, or just 1/10 for maaser kesafim.

    in reply to: Silence #2045486
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Random; is there a difference between one lost Jewish life and 20? It’s true that many… Many victims of abuse commit suicide. That doesn’t give the right to people to cause others to do the same, and it won’t bring the deceased victims back to life. It might make them feel good that there’s justice, but how satisfying is it in the long run? The damage has been done, and it takes immense personal struggle, effort and siyata dishmaya to overcome it.

    שב ועל תעשה עדיף is how I feel when faced with such an issue; I am not qualified to pasken dinei nefashos – I’ll leave it up to those who are to decide.

    in reply to: Why aren’t autistic people that are orthodox open about their diagnosis #2045490
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    **and it’s not in the sanctuary

    in reply to: Why aren’t autistic people that are orthodox open about their diagnosis #2045482
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Common; that psak is the same as many old shailos about events held in reform/conservative temples. The general rule is that you can go there if it’s necessary as long as it’s not during prayer times.

    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I hate to say it, but this post and another from a few months ago really seem to be expressing an urge to associate with irreligious Jews. As has been pointed out, we all know “neuroatypical” (to use the new expression) individuals who live in the community and who are known to be such; they can’t exactly hide it. Try davening at different shuls; you’ll find people who have autism if you look hard enough.

    I had a friend in high school who was missing his left hand due to a birth defect. Everyone knew but he was still a normal part of the group; he didn’t walk around with a t-shirt that said “I’m disabled” – instead he taught himself, somehow, to play basketball (he was actually quite good) and other things… He didn’t want his identity to be defined by his disability, and he was successful at doing so.

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2042398
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Syag; I don’t see why it’s odd. it’s the source for the halacha that is under discussion

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2042222
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Goldi, a man can (and should… this is what I’ve done personally) hold the door open for someone who’s having difficulty, man or woman. However if it’s a woman, you should wait a few moments before going in so as not to walk behind her. Walking behind a woman is a concern for hirhur; chazal say better to walk behind a lion than a woman

    in reply to: PETA #2042221
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Animal abuse is wrong because it’s against the Torah, not because animals are cute and we like them – tzaar baalei chaim applies equally to a rat as it does to a fluffy white kitten.

    in reply to: Bachurim Smoking in Yeshivas #2041588
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    TLIK – the difference here is that it’s not just a halacha issue where there’s a chumra and a kulah, and you’re astounded at how otherwise very scrupulous people can be so lenient on thus shaalah.

    Aveirah gorerea aveirah. If they were doing something halachikally wrong, it would spill over into their other practices as well, but as you noted, it doesn’t.

    Let’s look at it from a bochurs perspective. The gedolei olam, people on whose every word we hang, people who we’re medayak in….almost all of them smoked. Some did even after finding out it was harmful; perhaps the boost it gave their learning (which it does) was more important; nevertheless, no gedolei yisroel encouraged it. Some already discouraged it in Europe, including the heiligeh chofetz chaim. There are still a few extremely choshuv roshei yeshiva who smoke. Smoking isn’t evil, it doesn’t display a bad midah or lack of yiras shomayim….it isn’t much different halachikally from eating a case of donuts everyday; actually, the donuts are worse, because it’s just a taavah, while smoking has mental benefits… it’s a stimulant which helps many people focus. I have never smoked, nor do I ever intend to, but I’ve known too many ehrliche yidden who do to be able to dismiss it out of hand as some sort of aveirah.

    Comparing it with a device of clear ruchnius destruction is twisted; smoking was also not forbidden by ‘tons of poskim’. To my knowledge, the only body of ‘poskim’ who all of the sudden woke up and decided to forbid something was the RCA in the early 2000s. They let the internet, television, movies, intergender relationships, tznius, hair covering, and all manner of wanton sinfulness fester in their communities…but smoking!! Out come the payos – iz doch an issur gamur, venishnartem!! They also are the same types who isolate themselves from covid yet allow the diseased outside world directly into their souls, imbibing repulsive avodah zara, shfichus damin and gilui arayos without a second thought….and they expect us to take this ‘psak’ seriously? They also ‘paskened’ bot too long after about climate change….these wre are the self righteous, preaching to the choir activities of the largest branch of modern orthodox rabbis.

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2041403
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Holding a door open is a problem because you’re not supposed to walk behind a woman. There are other derech eretz alternatives; I really don’t understand your example from the chofetz chaim – having a beard always was a Jewish value. Not the highest on the list, but it’s something chazal talk about – hadras ponim zaken. It’s not a new invention.

    Racism etc…i agree with ujm; i do agree though that hating a particular race would be contrary to torah values and calling attention to that is fine

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2041143
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I’m only saying so because you said that KH and CH”H apply to newly adopted and developed ideas; i disagree with that statement, as KH and CH”H should only apply to Torah values

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2041103
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Halevi, it depends on which morals. We have no reason to portray to the world that we are tolerant of toevah, that we believe in inclusion diversity and equity, or that we believe people can change genders on a whim. We also need not avoid behavior that xan be seen as antagonistic to the climate change movement – there’s nothing wrong with having a gas guzzling SUV if one has it for practical purposes, etc…

    Chillul Hashem/kiddush Hashem is regarding Torah’s values, not self imposed made up malarkey.

    in reply to: Shelo Asani Isha #2040830
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    A kohen’s kadima in this regard applies even if he’s an am haaretz; in other matters we say that a mamzer talmid chochom is kodem – or does it apply to pikuach nefesh too?

    in reply to: Shelo Asani Isha #2040780
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    There’s a big difference between קדוש and מקודש, the latter being the expression that the bartenura and rambam use. Kadosh means something is holy. Mekudash means it is holi-fied, sanctified; consecrated – not intrinsically holier, but set aside from something else for a specific purpose. When the malachim praise Hashem, they don’t call him mekudash, they say kadosh. When you marry a woman, you call her mekudeshes, that she is now separate and specified for you and not other men l.

    It might sound like it’s splitting hairs, but i think it’s emes.

    I’ll try to fetch the sources for the oft-quoted sentiment that women are closer to Hashem’s idea of perfection and don’t need certain mitzvos – this isn’t one of my pet projects that i can rattle off sources for; though anti feminism sources….those I know a lot of.

    in reply to: Levush #2040605
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Inquisitive, unfortunately being part of the Torah world doesn’t mean we’re impervious to bad middos, or even abuse. Being ehrlich in one’s middos is a lifelong endeavor, and some people might think that they are doing just fine without it… It’s very sad. With or without the externals, we’re all going to have these challenges. It’s up to us to take every opportunity possible to improve on those issues and identify the middos that we have and how to fix them.

    That being said, the outside world is full of lashon hora and bad middos, not to mention untznius things – it’s how non Jews enjoy themselves. Most comedy is about making fun of someone else. Being part of the outside world definitely doesn’t help you grow in middos… Just imagine how much worse your parents would have been if they spent hours learning bad middos from movies and television…

    Hashem says “i have separated you from among the nations to be mine”, and chazal say on that pasuk…if you are separate from the non jews, then you are my people – the non jewish world is not all bad; we benefit from science, medicine, buildings and the economy, but the culture is anti Torah and only exacerbates the challenges we have from the yatzer hora on a daily basis.

    As to your questions in halacha; many poskim hold that one is not obligated to wear a hat and jacket while davening if that’s not how he normally dresses when meeting someone important. That just means it’s not an aveirah; we know that there’s a lot more to yiddishkeit than just “do this” and “don’t do this”. A hat and jacket is a constant reminder to a ben torah that he is part of the “ligyon shel melech”, the legion of Hashem – when it comes off, that feeling is partially lost.

    A vartel is a different story with two opinions going back hundreds of years. Chassidim hold like the poskim who say it’s an obligation, and most litvishe hold it isn’t.

    in reply to: Shelo Asani Isha #2040571
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Ujm, where does the rambam or anyone else say that the brocho is because men are holier than women? Many seforim say the exact opposite, that women are on a higher spiritual level than men and don’t require the same mitzvos.

    Also, we don’t find that there’s a kadima of men/women the same way we do with kohanim. Kohanim get manah yafah, the first and best choice of food, they are not supposed to serve us or dl favors for us, and other things of that nature, but if a man and woman are being given food in a line, there is no din that a man comes first.

    The only time we find such a kadima, to my knowledge, is by pikuach nefesh, where fhe sum of mitzvos requires a kadima.

    in reply to: Levush #2040575
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Inquisitive, consider where these reactions are coming from. Ask yourself why you don’t think it’s important to look different than the non Jews we live among, who have beliefs and practices that we need to be distant from.

    People choose to dress a certain way and are doing so while fully aware of how they will be seen – they are making a conscious decision to align themselves with a certain group or way of life.

    We’re not supposed to judge individuals, but by dressing a certain way, they’re putting out a very clear signal that they’re not interested in the lifestyle of a true ben torah(in the litvishe world).

    in reply to: Levush #2040513
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Inquisitive, consider what the liars who pretend to be totally frum would do if they dressed the way they behaved in private…. The dress and communal affiliation will prevent them from intermarrying, breaking shabbos in public, eating in treif restaurants and more.

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2040494
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    The distinction between ovdei avodah zara and stam goyim regarding taos akum, aveidas akum, etc, is found in a small minority of poskim. It’s not practical halacha.

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2040442
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Ujm, halacha is very clear that not returning a goy’s aveidah when failure to do so will result in a chilul Hashem is assur – we must do so to prevent a chilul Hashem. It’s considered a chilul Hashem because it looks like we don’t believe in being honest. We do, just the halacha allows us to keep their aveidos specifically. When a Jewish value is seemingly being violated, even if halachikally it isn’t, it’s a chilul Hashem.

    To make a kidush Hashem, it’s allowed to return the aveidah, but it’s not a chiyuv.

    in reply to: Tanach in Yeshivos #2040189
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Rav saadya gaon writes explicitly that the Jewish people are a nation only by virtue of its Torah. Umikra malei hu – hayom hazeh bheyaysi li le’am. Today you are for me a nation. In the midbar when they received the Torah. Not in eretz yisroel after the war and division.

    The reaction of the gedolei yisroel, notably rav hirsch (few wrote a lot on zionism) was that Judaism is a religion, not a nationality. Rav elchanan discussed it at length in his ikvesa demishicha, as did thw aforementioned bayos hazman, by rav Reuven grozovsky.

    They were reform? How dare you accuse the gedolei olam of such a thing?

    in reply to: Tanach in Yeshivos #2040187
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Also, are we forgetting that MTA was founded under his auspices? It’s a separate school, and it has a relatively robust gemara schedule compared to the standard MO day school joke olaces

    in reply to: Plastic surgery and Yiddishkeit #2039989
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Cs, at least 8 oz… Gotta be on the safe side.

    in reply to: shidduch probability #2039794
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    AAQ, my mistake; I actually remembered the OP wrong and thought she said BT; wasn’t trying to shoehorn my shitos… At least not this time

    in reply to: shidduch probability #2039665
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Ujm, it’s much harder if you’re nisht a hin nisht a hehr; sefardim often want only sefardi and ashkenaz (especially Yeshiva) are wary of sefardi backgrounds being less frum. That together with being a BT background makes it harder to get ashkenazi families, so if someone has a BT background and is half sefardi, and a woman…sefardim may be turned off by the yichus and ashkenazim will be turned off by the sefardi and lack of strong background.

    Of course these are all generalities; people with much, and i mean much, more baggage/things that are deemed chisronos (i.e., emotional problems, abuse, past history of OTD, gerim, and much more…most of these things aren’t chisronos at all but are viewed such) get married all the time.

    in reply to: Plastic surgery and Yiddishkeit #2039393
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    You’re raising very important concerns. The tzitz Eliezer mentions the argument against plastic surgery, that it is not healing, but rather saying to Hashem that his handiwork is faulty cv”s. There are also the issues of putting one’s self im danger, injuring one’s self unnecessarily, and vanity/gaavah. Some poskim allow it especially for women if it is to improve their appearance, and this is the position of rav Moshe feinstein in c.m. 2, 66. (though there is a simple distinction between facial defects and internal augmentations, which no teshuvos have been written about, as it involves a severe breach of tznius). Rav shlomo zalman differentiates between surgery removing a very noticeable blemish that causes psychological discomfort and social ostracization, and merely beautification to improve one’s appearance – the former is permitted and the later is not.

    Aish.com has a very good article on the topic. However it is not the accepted practice among yereim veshlaymim and bnos yisroel kedoshos, unless there’s a very distinct blemish that will harm one’s ability to find a shidduch/be damaging psychologically/ etc..

    in reply to: shidduch probability #2039382
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    If you’re fully sefardi you’ll have an easier time than if you’re half sefardi (especially if that half is your mother’s side). There are a ton of sefardi shadchonim in NYC; they also want professionals for the most part, and sefardim don’t place too much emphasis on religious background… Moreso on sefardi yichus. Divorce I don’t think will be a major hindrance either.

    in reply to: Public menorah lightings and rooftop menorahs #2039381
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Lost, I’m no chosid of the lubavitcher rebbe, but I honestly don’t believe he meant such a statement for his religious followers – a menorah is a “symbol” (mehaycha taysa?) that most Americans can identify with? Tyranny? It was that the Greeks wanted to regulate our religion… many Americans would support a government reining in a “weird” religion. Americans want to be free to watch television and eat hot dogs, not serve Hashem. I think the lubavitcher rebbe was speaking to or meant for his statement to be heard by goyim, honestly.

    in reply to: Kiddish/Chillul Hashem #2039287
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I’m not a fan of pleasure trips either; I think they’re a luxury that only frustrates and gives a false impression of relaxation.

    But what does that have to do with the value of such a traveller’s davening obligations??

    in reply to: Denigrating Gedolim #2039284
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    The facts are the those “synagogues” were band aids against assimilation that never did anything to treat the problems facing American jewry. The yeshivos, with pure unadulterated torah are what gave lasting kiyum to klal yisroel. Any family that doesn’t take learning seriously ends up assimilated sooner or later

    in reply to: Denigrating Gedolim #2039283
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Charlie; do you really think that the non charedi orthodox world would have been much different in America if not for rabbi yoshe ber? He was hired in a Yeshiva, taught torah for many years and had students who built orthodox shuls, mostly with mixed dancing and darshening up the New York times and rambling about ethics and whatnot… His greatness in learning was largely, sadly ignored by the aforementioned liberal rabbi people. His students who became pulpit rabbis could have just as easily gone to RJJ or to rav Moshe, who gave smicha to thousands. If anyone was *the* gadol hador whose direct influence in psak was and is felt by all generations of almost all sectors of klal yisroel, it’s rav moshe feinstein. Rabbi yoshe ber’s students who were lamdonim, like rav michel shurkin, were usually part of the Yeshiva world which valued such things.

    The yeshivos don’t ignore him just because he didn’t write much; his talmidim are very busy publishing the chidushei hagrid series. The reason why is because they understand his flaws and wish only to teach torah from true torah oriented gedolim.

    ” few charedi yeshiva teachers are linked directly to his mesorah”. He left his mesorah of beis brisk in exchange for Torah with kiekergaard. His mesorah was rav chaim and the beis halevi, both of whom are staples in the yeshivah world. In brisk, his father rav moshe is quoted extensively, even though he had some views that deviated from his mesorah. It’s all relative, no pun intended. Rabbi yoshe ber had absolutely no mesorah for going to university, aside from his mother’s side about whom rav chaim said “ich hob farliren a zun” when the women paskened a kashrus shailah in the kitchen on the day of his father’s wedding.

    in reply to: Denigrating Gedolim #2039223
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    AAQ, do you really think that rebbe akiva was against the death penalty and therefore sought a loophole to break the kavanas hatorah?

    He had a shitah in halacha that makes it virtually impossible to carry out misas beis din. It’s not activism; that’s what MO hacks claim because they wouldn’t know rishonim on shas if they bit them in the face.

    in reply to: Denigrating Gedolim #2039183
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I also don’t think that the influence of rabbi yoshe ber, or rabbi kook is on the rise. I think that the frummer elements of the MO and dati leumi world might be emphasizing them as opposed to the more modern rabbis, because they are shifting to the right, while left wing MO is shifting much more to the left, to the level of conservativism in the 50s.

    In the yeshivos, you will never hear rabbi yoshe ber quoted, while 30 years ago you did – people in the yeshiva world were interested in what he had to say…now, he has faded into the limelight. Rabbi kook as well.

    Another reason for this departure (and a way of seeing the falsity kf their opinions) is that both of them had visions of the future that have failed to materialize at all. Rabbi yoshe ber saw the future of the torah world in YU, and he said that if we remain yeshivish, we will die out. Rabbi kook said that the leaders of the state of Israel would all do teshuva and make a state that’s run by halacha. Neither of those things happened; in fact, the precise opposite occured. YU’s model for community and educatio, instead of becoming the dominant stream, has been reduced to being the kiruv cases for the mainstream orthodox. Their involvement in the secular culture has eroded them into being almost indistinguishable from their non jewish counterparts in thought and appearance, and often in deed as well. Rabbi yoshe ber would have recoiled in horror at the thought of LGBT rights, polyamory discussed by high school debate team groups, or even the movies consumed and imbibed by the MO masses.

    in reply to: Denigrating Gedolim #2039178
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    Mdf, rabbi yoshe ber vacillated between shitos, ranging from yeshiva thought, to modernity. He never gave tochacha to his community either, which was a major reason for him not being accepted by the gedolei hador (as heard from rav belsky, regarding the tochacha part). Those two things together make me think that he didn’t consider himself a rov or manhig capable of dispensing torah wisdom, though intellectually he was more than capable. He kept changing his mind about things because he wasn’t comitted to a mesorah fully, and was trying to figure things out on his own.

    This is my impression of rabbi yoshe ber based on the talmidim of his that I’ve known and read of.

    I aget the feeling that he spoke one way with people like rav michel shurin, rav abba bronspigel, rav moshe meiselman, and rav aharon kahn…and another way with norman lamm and his sort. There were two parts to him that did not exist harmoniously; on the one hand, he was a scion of the brisker dynasty, and on the other, he was a PHd who knew like 10 languages and could write academically in all of them. I think a modern talmid brought out the academic, non traditional side of him, and a yeshiva man spoke to his deeply rooted Torah background. I think this frustration can be found in the title of his book “lonely man of faith”. He was a deep believer in Hashem and Torah, and I’m sure he cared about the mitzvos as well. But he also had a yatzer hora, and it succeeded in getting him into secular philosophies. He also had a wife who influenced him greatly as well. Rav simcha sheps was a rosh yeshiva in Torah Vodaas. He was also a talmid of the brisker rov, and probably the first in America to bring that mahalach to American bochurim (besides rav Moshe Soloveitchik, rabbi yoshe ber and his brother rabbi aharon). Once, a bochur said in shiur that “JB says the same sevara!”. Rav sheps kept a cup of orange juice on his desk at all times, should his blood sugar get too low, as he was diabetic. He suddenly threw the orange juice at the bochur, screaming “vi redst du oif a talmid chacham!?!”. After shiur one bochur who had a lot of guts asked the rosh yeshiva why he defended rabbi yoshe ber so much, as he’s not “fun unzerer”. Rav sheps answered him that rabbi yoshe ber was indeed a greater lamdan than rav aharon kotler, but we don’t follow him because he has been influenced greatly by his wife. Being big in learning means that we need to not disrespect him. It doesn’t mean we should refrain from calling out some of his false opinions. I never refer to him by insulting names such as JB, but i do not believe for a minute that he was from the gedolei hador to whom i must be machnia and mekabel kenisinasam misinai.

    in reply to: Public menorah lightings and rooftop menorahs #2038976
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    TS, i was saying the reason why lubavitchers refer to him as “the rebbe” even when talking to people who aren’t lubavitch, because they think he’s everyone’s rebbeh,nasi, etc. I don’t believe that myself: he was a rebbe of lubavitcher chasidim, not others and was by no means the first and foremost leader of a generation… We haven’t had one figure as a completely universal leader since rebbe yehuda hanasi

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