mentsch1

My first car (hand me down)
Headlights and grill held in by wire
Trunk closed with a padlock attached to two eye hooks drilled into trunk and bumper (back then bumpers were steel)
Blech covered hole in the floor by drivers seat (floor was eaten away by rust) you had to make sure not to drive over puddles or you got wet. I always carried a spare change of clothes.
It goes without saying no a/c
Passenger door didn’t open bc of past accident.
Final straw was when reverse went out.
Ah
The good old days when you could hand your mechanic a $20 to get an inspection sticker

Catch
It wasn’t ocd.

Rebyid
“Happy wife = Happy life”
This rule means that the Y chromosome often has to apologize for things that he knows he isn’t wrong about and has to live with things he knows he shouldn’t. Despite the X chromosome always believing they are right and rarely apologizing the Y chromosome somehow moves on.

Catch yourself
During my sheva brochos ( first marriage) I learned that my parents had not properly trained me in all manners of proper behavior. Apparently there are very specific ways of closing cereal boxes and even what surfaces car keys can touch. Apparently the X chromosome somehow creates a need for control on all matters considered trivial by Y chromosome carriers.

What would you say if you were writing an online dating profile? The idea is present yourself in a positive way, and to express a little about who you are and what you are looking for. It’s not about getting dates , it’s about getting good matches so be honest but not too honest . you don’t say you are unemployed you say what your field is, for ex. I chose special ed bc I love helping kids.
In regards to pics, supply one in which you look good. It’s enough of a bushah that people (mothers) are demanding pics. Now they are asking for multiple pics and they can’t be chasuna pics only “natural”. Don’t play that game. Give a pic that presents you best. (How many of those mothers would be caught without their makeup on?!)
Good luck!

Akuperma
I don’t know your personal situation. But your assessment seems way off. I make enough to itemize, and everyone assumes bc of my profession that I must be rich. But the reality is if you have a large family the tuition bill alone can be 50+ a year. (I know people paying way more) Health ins 35k a year . Camps 15-20 k. Being makpid n maaser 15-20ka year . That’s 100k min bf everyday expenses ! Even with a modest home, car etc you need 150-200 k a year just to stay in the black. Forget about putting money away for retirement.

Ct
Spoke to my accountant yesterday. He had the same assessment. Kudos to republican Peter king for voting against it.
And Joseph
It’s one thing to thank the President
It’s quite another to get emotionally invested in a politician . They all lie and manipulate. I’m going to save the blanket statements till after he is out of office bc maybe then the picture will be clear.

Daas
I’m not sure how your definition of noach fits the Gemara. But even so it doesn’t change the philosophical question.
Let me ratchet it up a little. If we didn’t exist there would be no discomfort, no pain , no trials etc. both physical and spiritual . Our existence is supposedly because Hashem has a need to give. So Hashem s need to give creates the system . The system has pain and consequences involved. We didn’t ask to be created and part of the system. Had we not been created the loss of reward would not be felt. Therefore how can our creation be part of a selfless need to give? Since ultimately many will suffer?

2 cents
or to rephrase what you said
If you only worship a G-d you can understand that really you are just worshiping yourself

Joseph
I was at many a protest in Yerushalyim in the 90’s.
All were attended by gedolim. All were announced in advance and thus did not grossly inconvenience people. All had tehillim and tefilla on the agenda.
As opposed to these. None attended by gedolim. Inconvenience is the objective. Instead of tefilla , we have fists and kicks.
I do not believe for one second the gedolim (including Rav Auerbach, who by the way, I used as a posk in EY, though I dont claim to know him well other then shaylos we asked to him since we lived near by) condone these violations of Halacha. Yom kippur is not m’chaper for ben adom l’chavero and there are definite damages in these protests.
Personally I find it disturbing that you can believe that gedolim are happy with this.

You started with a question of a religious nature and then immediately switched to a secular issue.
There is no connection between kiddush hashem and democracy. Democracies are not built on religious values just the opposite. In fact you constantly rage against the democratic principles of both Israel and the US.
So the reality is, the peleg people are using a zionistic/secular “right” to protest to attempt to promote a religious value. I think we can all see the irony and hypocrisy.

In addition. From the creation of our religion till now, it was never the desire of gedoli yisroel who were having a machlokes that the masses get involved. Because the masses always violate Halacha when they get involved. Whether it’s lashon hara or more serious breaches. And they can never fathom the intent of a gadol. Our history is replete with examples of this, the masses distorting and creating large rifts with the “right intentions ” of upholding their “rebbes honor”. One of my rebbeim in yeshiva used to say on this “the road to Gehennim is paved with all these good intentions ”
Which is why truly frum people always wait for specific instructions from the gedolim before joining protests etc.

Ubiq
BH very nice
got to go on the usual diet now
how was yours?

To answer your question
Because John Smith is about to meet an inevitable end at the proper time whether by bullet or aneurysm or falling Chinese space station
His death is not in his hands. Mr schizo is just Gods pawn.
One question not dealt with by your side of the fence is, did the overall amount of deaths go down in england post gun control? now obviously there is no way to measure how many people G-d wants dead in year 5778. But that is the question. I agree that removing all guns may “feel good” , make people feel more secure. But that doesn’t mean they should, because death comes for all
I know many people who are extremely health conscious who still end up with cancer etc, how come their histadlus didn’t help? You are arguing that gun control is personal hishtadlus, I am arguing thats way outside the definition of personal
And lets think of the story I used. Mary deserved to die in one way because she put herself at risk, on the other hand she didn’t lose out at all and even gained. Even our idea of premature death is skewed.

All this said, because you were nice I am going to give you some points.
You aren’t wrong, because all that I have been arguing is actually a machlokes. There is an opinion that a bad person can do something “against G-ds will”. what that means, I don’t know. Frankly it goes against the current (mainly chassidic?) philosophy that even a leaf dropping off a tree is under Hashem’s Hashgocho. But there is a source. BN when I have some time and will get it for you.

MW13 and (NE)
It is clear that the founding fathers wanted the second amendment to counter an authoritative govt. As I have pointed out they started a war to achieve political aims. I also pointed out that this argument (countering an authoritative govt) is a legal argument and not a jewish value. Starting a war with Britian was morally wrong, despite what the fathers claimed, they were a benign govt. to us.
Just as obviously the fathers couldn’t predict tanks etc. (I wonder what their position on civilian owned cannons was? probably they were ok with it)
That said, to paraphrase Dilbert, I’m fine with every civilian owning a gun, bazooka etc. as long as I have all the ammunition. Because frankly I don’t trust the rest of you guys
I am perfectly fine with gun control. If we must own guns I think they should be regulated with mandated training etc. (as I have said before to prevent negligence). I don’t agree with the underlying hashkafa of the fathers intent with the second amendment and neither do I agree with the first. Both are Hashkafically wrong.
Now we get to implementation (which NE forbade me to discuss)
The implementation is, and will be a continue to be , a disaster
I pointed to 5% compliance with the “assault weapon ban” in NYS after sandy hook, the result being the creation of tens of thousands of instant felons in NYS. Multiply that across the US and we are talking about a crises. Is it worth it to take existing law abiding citizens and throw them into jail to try and cheat death? As I have said I don’t believe that hashkafically you can make that argument. ( I happen to be liberal about the criminal justice system, I believe it to be largely immoral)
In addition the entire “assault rifle ban” is foolishness and only fools the uninformed. It only bans cosmetic features of semi automatic weapons. Leaving the ability to simply reshape the stock and make that same weapon legal. So again, are these laws worth it? sending our citizens to jail for political points with the uninformed public? I think not.

Joseph
Not sure how that is relevant
There is a mitzva of self defense
The Torah commands us to kill on numerous occasions.
We should spend our days learning and not fighting yet clearly Hashem feels there are times when the reverse is true.
Hashem could have swept the 7 nations away with a flood yet he commanded us to battle them for decades

Rabbi Berlin
Sorry
As I’ve said several times , the gemarah specifically points to putting yourself in a dangerous situation as an exclusion . You risk changing your destiny by doing something risky. Otherwise, life is ordained . No one in ww2 could have altered their fate by any means.
This hashkafa is one I am well familiar with having grown up in an MO young Israel. Plenty of members wore kippas with “never again ” on it. Or they were members of kach or jdl. It’s an improper hashkafah.
Plenty of my MO relatives still talk about the gedolim of prewar Europe as being complicit in the slaughter bc they didn’t tell Jews to get out. It’s kefira.
See my next post

Overall the question of public health policy and hishtadlus is an interesting question
Most recently the question comes up with the anti vax crowd. Can you demand that someone do something for the sake of the community?
surprisingly, the shiurim I have heard on this goes contrary to public opinion (which tends to be emotional). Halacha decides things on probability principles. And since the risk is so low right now, then a person can not be forced to vaccinate since his chance of hurting others is not significant l’halacha.
Wouldn’t this apply to guns? The individual risk of a gun owner hurting someone is so small then we cant / shouldn’t compel someone to give up a tool that does have a valid function.
On the other hand Yekke and others
If you are dealing with a high risk situation (mental/domestic issues) then you can/should force compliance

Berlin
everyone who survived was meant to survive, those that were meant to die did. Hashka 101. You didn’t read history books and see people who tried to escape and didn’t, or who lived through the war and died when ingesting a piece of chocolate from a concerned GI?
You can’t ingest arsenic bc you can’t demand open miracles, same for the others, you also lose divine protection (ie you can change your fate) when you engage in risky behavior (chagiga, conversation between the malach hamaves and a tana).
PERSONAL Hishtadlus is required. You can not change the fate of those 59, that’s not Personal hishtadlus. Their fates were sealed, by bullets or bus, this is basic.

Ubiq
I’m not sure how to respond about Heller. I tell you it’s obvious in the context of history. You tell me that it wasn’t obvious until 2008 and Heller was decided. But don’t we say yeish brerah that the supreme court upheld it was obvious since the constitution?

As part of my original argument about limits
Many pro-guns (not the idealistic lunatics) would be willing to have a discussion, but the obvious dis-ingeniousness on the left prevents it. If they would agree to certain stipulations there would be more compromise.
Isn’t taxes a similar example? The left always wants to tax more, but without saying what the upper limit are (if you left it to bernie sanders the upper limit would be 100% tax rate)
If they wanted more cooperation there first needs to be a discussion on what they agree would be the most someone could be taxed and then compromise from there

yekke and others
There are obviously inyanim of hishtadlus here
The obvious question on my philosophy that I was expecting someone to ask is why not leave my gun or knife out so my 3 year old can play with it. The answer is hishtadlus. There is also a concept that engaging in risky behavior nullifies protection from Hashem (second perek chagiga)
yekke, also you run into the obvious problem of 1 of those seven nohadite laws, so clearly Hashem wants hishtadlus
Ubiq
I own guns and use them strictly for fun (have you ever tried shooting, it’s better and cheaper then therapy). I happen to not keep them at home bc I feel that having a gun takes a person to a place of saying koach vetzem yudi, and therefore not relying on Hashem. However if my neighborhood was dangerous , then I believe it would become an issue of hishtadlus to own one.
NE
I actually apologize, bc I posted after only reading half your post, then regretted my answer. Don’t have time now, but one point. I read an article in the 90’s by a liberal democrat who was anti-gun. Then he lived through the rodney king riots and came to the conclusion that anti-gun is a nice philosophy until law and order breaks down, then we are on our own. Gun ownership is entrenched bc we started as an unregulated country (indians, outlaws etc) and every one was on their own. Sure I agree, Utopian society would be better(and I would give up my guns in a heartbeat for that society) but the other side would argue but what happens when the cops aren’t there for me . And this happens quite often. Stories (not in the main stream press) of using weapons to save yourself happen quite often. I know 2 people personally with such stories.
Which gets us back to main question
stripping away the emotion, this is a health policy decision (my field) and I will compare halachically and hashkaficaaly to the anti vax crowd if i have time

Berlin
Hitler was a tool of the RBSO. The same way paroh and Nebuchadnezzar were. This doesn’t absolve them of responsibility (as one one who has learnt Chumash knows the question of paroh, bechira and punishment are discussed at length)
Guns are a tool of the RBSO the same way car bombs and lorries are for mowing down pedestrians. The death sentence comes from G-d, the one who brings about the death is responsible. I would think this is hashkafa 101, do you disagree ?

I have already stated my opinion that I believe in gun control regulation and training to avoid stupidity/injury

Rabbiofberlin
I don’t understand your comment at all. If your point is that without Hitler those millions would still be alive, I would call that kefirah. Because it certainly sounds like you are saying that hitler was more powerful and able to circumvent God

Ubiq
I think you are proving the point rather then negating it
The founding fathers created the second amendment, not for hunting, not even for personal protection but for the purpose of keeping government in check. Which is obvious, because after all, the founding fathers went to war to throw off their government. Now I happen to thinking that our founding fathers were immoral and got people killed for no reason. The British government was not as oppressive as the american history books would have us believe. (nod to NE and the British Empire which had been very good to the american colonies)
That said this dis-ingeniousness from Liberals is typical on the subject. The purpose of a mandated militia/gun ownership in the constitution is obvious. The twisting to push a narrative is also obvious. For a conversation to have a validity there needs to be an acknowledgement to both sides having a point. The liberal POV is that any republican who feels entitled to own a gun is evil. That is hardly an acknowledgement to the legitimacy of ownership. Namely the constitutional right due to governmental checks and balances (not a jewish value but a legality that would need addressing, which will only happen if people feel their POV is being heard) and the right to protection (a jewish value) and the belief of personal responsibility (guns don’t kill, people do-also a jewish value)

There are several nice gun ranges in Lakewood, NJ
There are always frum yidden there, of every stripe
It’s not unusual for me to see white shirted fathers with lange beards with long skirted daughters on a chol hamoed trip

The first response by ADOCS was the most intelligent
because he (she?) understands that when liberals talk of control they talk in terms of steps. When they say “lets ban automatic weapons” they mean “lets start with this and then we will ban this next and then this next”
If liberals would come out and say “we recognize the civilians right of protection in the second amendment , we will stipulate that we need to guarantee those rights, lets compromise” Then a lot more people would be willing to have this conversation with them . but we recognize the deceit implicit in their words.
and also
why is the second amendment the only one we need to compromise on? why not the first also? Is all speech really good? shouldn’t we ban some speech also?

Isn’t all this makeup, clothes etc. really a females choice because they feel that it is the only way to date? It’s not technically a necessary cost it’s a cost they choose, in order to give themselves an advantage (we can argue whether it’s false advertising in another thread)
and OP
same question
the fancy meal is a choice made by you to give yourself an advantage. You can, of course, to do 15 straight lounge dates

CTRebbe
If we are lowering the expectations of women on voluntary costs that make their dates seem more interesting, wealthy etc
Don’t, in the name of equality, we need to lower male expectations on voluntary costs that make their dates seem more pretty ?

Goan
I don’t know that Rav Moshe considers it a kula. Certainly the story in the Rav Gerstner biography where he and rav Gerstner argue the point with the alter mirrers seems to imply the opposite.
The concept of chalev akum is based on sofek/chashash, even far fetched. Theoretically, if there was 0 chance of pigs milk there is no issur. Rav Moshe’s tshuva only says a baal nefesh should keep it, which as i understand those words, means its a worthy chumra.