mentsch1

Based on the rema (YD 148:12) it seems that there is no issue. I would venture to say that you can probably say a generic “happy holiday “ even around Xmas time
The standard given is aivah/hate with most of the restrictions mentioned in the gemarah removed bc what the goyim practice now is not the avodah zarah meant in the gemarah.
The only real restriction still in effect seems to be going into their houses on the day of their holiday and using the word shalom (since it’s Hashems name)
The kitzur adds more things like supplying them material to help build a church
As for the link above. I can’t open it with my filter and there is no siman 148 in the SA Harav (what is the summary?)
Btw. Even holiday parties are mentioned as being mutar (but a baal nefesh should attempt to not go)

Neville
Again with the being deliberately obtuse. It’s almost as if you invent statements that people make just so you can try to score points. I wonder if there is a word (or 2) for that.
No one said anything about an irrational hatred of anyone. The context has always been in the realm of philosophy. Nor did anyone say anything about sitting around and bashing people.
I make the same point, we all prefer our own minhagim and to an extent look down on the minhagim and philosophies of others as being strange. why is it worse when a lubavitcher calls me a snag than when I roll my eyes and make a comment when i see a chassid driving after shkia on erev shabbos?
And another thing, and I do not know how this escaped you. I (and CT) are the non chassidim defending the other side here. At no point did I get involved in this machlokes. Yet you are being pretty persistent about calling out others on there beliefs.
So explain to me how I am the one spewing hatred and you are the mentsch?

If you are a teenage girl still in bed on a Shabbos or Sunday morning at 11:30 AM, it’s definitely not fatigue.

Neville
You are being deliberately obtuse
Litvish is what I am, it describes my religious leanings and perhaps my family origins
Misnagdish is the rest of the family who emphatically oppose chassidik philosophy. (I am more ambivalent to chassidik thought). see the difference?
If you would like to create a new term that describes ones opposition to chassidik philosophy, yet does so without implying a litvish inferiority complex, feel free to coin the term.

Neville
I’m starting to think you are a Dave Barry fan

Nomesorah
Here’s the quote from the book page 460
“He was always stringent about making sure to drink some thing, because his father told him that if one does not usually eat or drink after a siyum, it is questionable, whether the siyum can replace the fast of the first born on erev pesach. Rav Chaim made it a point to always drink something after each siyum to ensure it was treated as a meaningful gathering”

Avirah
Dirshu MB doesn’t fulfill the chayei adoms wishes either
He specifically mentions long cycles. What is the dirshu cycle ? Once every 5+ years?
I do not know anything about sechel learning program. I am simply pointing out that his learning program is no different than the average litvak in terms of chashivus.
I am perfectly fine with labeling the average litvak (including myself) an am haaretz.
I may not prefer or even be machshiv chassidik learning, but that doesn’t make it any less chashuv in the eyes of the Rebonei Shel Olam.

In the biography it brings that rav chaim usually tried to have a kos of wine when finishing a mesechta
But if he was in kollel he always made at least a shehakol (even if only on water)
By celebrating every siyum with food it cements the association and gives more credence to the idea of using a siyum to get out of fasting

Smiler
I love how you keep comparing yourself to bais shamai
I am more than willing to accept your interpretation of this
Just find a tshuva supporting your POV
Baring that it’s just am haratzus masquerading as tzidkus

Coffee
Interestingly enough I saw yesterday that Shivti recently covered this in their chuburah pamphlets
I am referring to the aspect of buying from a jew and whether it is just a mitzvah or chiyuv
The question is relevant to all of us
In the pamphlet there are tshuvos on this.
I am not faulting the OP for his decision to buy in a goyish store. I do not force my wife to only buy jewish. She shops at Aldi’s etc. You can certainly ask me what my heter is.
I am faulting the OP for his reasoning. If he wants to argue it is more convenient, significantly cheaper etc. I cant argue with that
If he wants to argue it is a bigger mitzvah, well, that is false

Smiler
You should be that person
Don’t be one of those guys on the sidelines who tells everyone else what they are doing wrong
Get proactive. Start that big Lakewood grocery that caters to your crowd. I am sure you will make a fortune!

simcha
this case happened to me
a neighbor who holds of the flatbush eiruv came needing lechem mishna
I invited them to eat with us but when they said no I politely refused to give them the bread
certainly to pick it up and hand it to them is assur for me (i made the akirah)
but i felt that aiding in anyway and allowing them to take it on their own was also assur
afterward i asked my LOR after and he agreed with me

It turns out that chumra has its own wiki entry
Here’s a quote

A second meaning of chumra is simply “a stricter interpretation of a Jewish law (Halakha), when two or more interpretations exist”.

Those who adopt such a stringency do not feel they are adding to the halakha. Rather, they think they are following the baseline requirement (if the strict interpretation is correct) or at least “covering their bases” (if it is impossible to determine whether the strict or lenient opinion is correct). Nevertheless, such stringency may be seen as adding to halacha by someone who believes the lenient interpretation (qulla) is correct.

Seems to me this pretty much sums up the arguments we have here

smerel
my experience with YU was 1 day long and i didnt stick around long enough to find out about different programs (in fact i was so upset i went straight home before the interview)
I found out later that there are different dorms. My YI Rabbi who wanted me to go there was disappointed and told me “of course I would have made sure you are in the better dorm”
But the guys I was visiting were frum. I was with the brother of one of them who was a friend of mine and they grew up in a more modern home in BP
That said
I do not deny there are good people there
I have had the pleasure of having some eat at my table on shabbos. I have had Stern girls who are indistinguishable from bais yaakov girls. I am just relaying my experience. BH it happened. It set me on a different path.

Neville
I’m not saying that at all
By no means are these kids off the derech
They are products of yeshiva high schools that cater to these groups and were successful at keeping them on the derech
But their level of commitment is not what they’re rabbeim we’re hoping for. And they are getting married to similar girls.
Their kids wear yarmulkas (colored ones of course). And are going to frum play groups. And there will be a need for community type schools for their kids.
They are all over the place . Including clusters around Lakewood.

Neville
And is possible that you aren’t actually aware of the off the derech problem in the yeshivish community ?
Because I find it hard to believe that there is someone out there who is blind to the fact that for every yeshivish kid who became “modern” there is at least one who is truly off the derech
And it isn’t just kids. I know numerous marriages broken up Bc one spouse decided to go off (and also one couple that decided to do it together)

Let’s also be honest that there is a newish classification of just plain “modern” when applied to those who came from black hat families but now don’t identify as such.
Growing communities (even in Lakewood) whose commitment is indistinguishable from MO, and perhaps even worse. They keep shabbos and minimal kashrut but might not put on tzitzis or only go to shul on shabbos.
Ideologically they aren’t “MO” Perhaps subconsciously they have deeper guilt feelings . But from what I can tell there are minimal differences.
This group is now having kids. I’m assuming the day will come soon when there are schools even in Lakewood whose children are growing up in houses where there are tv’s.
So why can’t we just agree that there are ideological differences between the camps . But there is much movement between these camps.

Avirah
by extension lets criticize fund raising
A huge/gashmiosdik tzedakah auction just took place
A huge amount of money went into the prizes that could have gone to the tzedakah instead, so cut that out, it’s “gashmiosdik”
Think of big weddings as a fund raiser for rich balei batim
They spend a lot of money on the wedding (which is technically a mitzvah) and by extension give more money to tzedakah

Rav Hunter said years ago that it is within the spirit of giving and to leave them alone
If you tell the wealthy to be stingy by themselves then the same middah carry’s over to their tzedakah
Why can’t people just do their own thing?
I’m a simple person who makes simple affairs even though BH I can afford more. Do your own thing and people will respect you for not bowing to peer pressure

Someday
The pshat is still flawed
How long can someone survive without a suit?
0-30 seconds in the vacuum of space, less than 2 minutes on Mercury, less than a second on Venus, 80 years on Earth, 3 minutes on the Moon, 2 minutes on Mars, less than a second on Jupiter, and less than a second on Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune.

Let’s say a yid gets trapped in a foreign country. Maybe he is facing jail or even a death sentence. You are friends with the king and can pick up the phone and beg him to intercede. The king has influence especially in former UK countries and agrees to do you a favor.
In the eyes of the naysayers (Ujm /Neville) is that good enough for you to justify what you perceive as a wrongdoing ? Bc that isn’t an unlikely scenario. Some unsavory politicians have saved the lives of Jews .

Frumkeit
So by your way of thinking
Every rabbi/frum Askan should refuse to shake the hand of politicians who are immoral?
Because that pretty much excludes all of them

Common
Just curious (same question applies to neville) do you guys actually remember these old threads that you go searching for them when appropriate?
Because frankly I can barely remember my kids names

Neville
I see what you did there
I thought you saw the nuance
Unless this has nothing to do with the other thread
If not I apologize

I’m still trying to figure out if rebdoniel was a real convert