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popa_bar_abbaParticipant
Dear Blood boiling on the net,
Chazir mareh telafav indeed.
The truth is, I don’t hate him. I think he is horribly misguided, and has personal challenges. But what he does and did here is very very wrong.
Sorry I can’t help more.
love,
Popa bar Abby
popa_bar_abbaParticipantDear Feif Un,
I am getting bored of trolling myself. I need more people who I can troll. What do you suggest?
love,
Popa bar Abby
popa_bar_abbaParticipantDear Trollfan,
Please cease and desist from using that name. It contains the term “troll”, which is trademarked and refers only to me. If you continue, I will be forced to file suit in a court of competent jurisdiction.
love,
Popa bar Abby
popa_bar_abbaParticipantDY: I think it is far more likely that Health simply wanted to start a debate about accepting geirim who may or may not end up keeping halacha.
And he succeeded admirably.
And I kind of also wanted to see that debate, because I will never skip an opportunity to make fun of the geirus clowns like Weiss and his ilk.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantbecause you don’t even know that he’s not talking about denim. he’s talking about linen! As anyone who is familiar with tznius knows!
popa_bar_abbaParticipantHis dislike of denim is based on how denim was perceived in 1930s. He feels that because denim was primarily worn by people who were considered lower-class in those times, it is unfitting for a Bas Melech.
I’m not aware linen was ever used by the lower classes. His dislike of it is for the obvious tznius reasons, that I need not spell out.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI can have ten pictures of attractive girls and still only like the looks of one of them
I think it was the last one was particularly telling.
Hmm. Well, I won’t tell if you won’t tell.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantDear OneofMany,
This is a very deep question. I understand completely why you would seek advice from an expert on life instead of a techie, on such an important issue. My advice is to follow your heart, and to use Chrome since it is much faster.
love,
Popa bar Abby
popa_bar_abbaParticipantDear Popa bar Abby,
I am dating a girl and I think she is the one, but I have the following problem. I always thought I would marry an older fat girl so as not to add to the shidduch crisis and thinness crisis. But this girl is young and thin. So it is bothering me and making me feel guilty.
Also, she always complains to me about guys who only want to marry a young thin girl, and that anyone who does that is a creep. I don’t know if she realizes that I am apparently doing that. So now I think she doesn’t respect me.
I would break up with her, except that the shadchan told me that this is the perfect one and that if I don’t marry her he will never set me up again. And I think I would only want to marry someeone through this shadchan.
I think I can solve the thin problem by convincing her to gain weight, but how can I ever make her be older than me? That is impossible!
Please help soon.
Love,
Desperate Dater
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Dear Desperate Dater,
You are perfect for each other. It is mamish ??? ??? ?? ????. You should get married and then divorce her if she doesn’t gain weight.
Love,
Popa bar Abby
popa_bar_abbaParticipantIn all seriousness, if you’re worried about it, speak to your therapist.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantYou don’t need to make fun
popa_bar_abbaParticipantA big problem. This is why machmirim wash before shabbos and keep their hands inside gloves the entire shabbos, and don’t sleep at all so that they don’t have to wash negel vasser, and stay in the north pole during the summer and south pole during the winter so that it won’t be nightime and they won’t have to wash negel vasser.
oy, shver tzu zein a yid.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantOk. Can the CR please help me with this problem:
I am a 23 year old guy, and I have never seen a girl besides for my mother. I am starting to date, and I have heard on the YWN CR that only thin girls are attractive. But I am afraid that I will find any girl attractive because I will not know what is considered thin and what is not.
So, can anyone describe for me exactly how to know if she is thin enough? My mother says if I tell her a dress size, she can just ask about that and then we’ll know.
Please help fast.
(maybe I should have posted this in Dear Popa bar Abby)
popa_bar_abbaParticipant“…denim is being used as a code word for linen…”
Really? Code? Secret code? CIA? Are we talking espionage? I am at a loss. Please clarify.
CIA? Who said anything about CIA? Have you never heard of any codes besides the CIA?
It is a normative social standard to refer to certain things by “clean” names. Do you say “bathroom”? Is it a room with a bath? Does it always have a bath? Are you in the CIA because you don’t say toiletroom?
popa_bar_abbaParticipantThis makes no sense. Everybody knows that denim is being used as a code word for linen, and that linen is definitely not tzanua. So why is there argument about it?
popa_bar_abbaParticipantYes, WIY, it is hard to tell if you are saying you only date supermodels or just only date “10”‘s.
Would you please post some pictures of your last few dates?
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI read a study of divorces which said something like over 50% of divorces mention Facebook as one of the reasons for getting divorced.
That does not prove causation at all. Facebook is the way people communicate, and people who are in bad relationships and looking outside the relationship will use the normal ways people communicate to do so.
I bet before facebook a similar study would have mentioned telephones.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI agree with them that there is a problem. But, the stat means nothing unless you compare it to the number of guys who will never get married.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantYou know, the first 4 posts on this thread were good, but then it just got dumb. (and untznius)
December 11, 2012 1:36 pm at 1:36 pm in reply to: Taking vacation holidays between Dec 25 and Jan 1 #913076popa_bar_abbaParticipantI take my kids out of school during that time. That is when we have time with our family, and it is more important than them being in school and making a couple more menorahs that will probably catch fire.
The school is probably mad, but I give them enough money that they are wise enough to shut up about it.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantPopa – every decision is a moral decision.
You didn’t understand my point. Nobody in the world has ever suggested that the free market makes the best moral decisions.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantNot exactly, Popa. As I suggested, even if we had such statistics, I don’t think they’d be very useful. Anyone reading our respective posts should be able to tell we disagree on a lot more than the feasibility of measuring gerim frumness.
Well, now you’re just confusing me. I think anyone reading our posts would have concluded that we do agree but for a system of measuring–up to this post where you are taking it all back. [
I guess we’ll just have to wonder.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantOooh! I have to go check it out.
hee hee. exactly what I just did.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantThe free market is the best way to do things (when talking policy over many people with different ideals) unless it brings clear injustice. The free market clearly shows that men favor thin girls.
We are talking about moral decisions, not making laws.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantOomis- i would never date a fat size ten girls. by your logic she could end up a 36! and anyway, my mother would never hear of it.
Yes, I don’t know why people think guys will be convinced by being told that people gain weight later anyway. If anything, that is a reason to insist on an even thinner spouse.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI think I’m gonna use frozen hash browns to make them. My wife says she isn’t allowed to do melacha, and is machmir on the whole night.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantThat isn’t why. The reason to not wear denim is because it was invented by Levi Strauss for men to wear in mines, and therefore it is kli gever.
The reason why long skirts are bad is that in scotland the men wear long skirts so that is also kli gever.
I’m glad to help.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantBlazes, my civic is almost old enough to date according to NASI.
I still want tire chains. If my wife is reading this, that’s what I want for chanuka.
And latkes.
December 9, 2012 6:45 pm at 6:45 pm in reply to: Very Interesting! The Reason Why We Eat Jelly Donuts On Chanukah #990797popa_bar_abbaParticipantRiddle:
On chanuka one year, popa eats 3 jelly donuts on the first day. How many will he eat on the second day?
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI don’t exactly agree about the shadchan, but it kind of depends on your community’s style of dating.
It seems to me that by the time you are thinking of getting married, the shadchan’s role is no longer to be a go-between, but just to give sage advice to either and both of you. It seems funny to me that you’d be thinking of getting married if you aren’t comfortable telling him that you are thinking of getting married.
But again, it depends on your community’s style. If you are a 5-6 date community, and it isn’t really expected that you’ll have much of a relationship before getting engaged, then perhaps the shadchan would still have a go-between role.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI think there is a machlokes about being doresh taama d’kra. So you can find where that is, then find 5 places where those tannaim argue and the gemara says it is based on doresh taama d’kra.
And then you’ll even be saying something correct.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantOk. So our disagreement boils down to whether we have good information about what percentage of geirim are staying frum.
Gotcha.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantOh oops. You should have said that first.
Oh oops. You did say that first.
oh well.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantPlease don’t answer by ranting about untznius Flatbush and 5 Town woman.
Oh oops. You should have said that first.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantThose 5 towns and brooklyn women who wear long denim skirts and do it specifically to be machshil men and are the biggest problem in judaism, and the reason for all the ills we have and the shidduch crisis, and they do it in the street with no busha and they teach their daughters to do it also, and don’t they care about their own sons who have to go outside every day into that same world which they are polluting with their pritzus and long sheitels and skirts and long heels and long nails and long sleeves.
December 9, 2012 5:38 pm at 5:38 pm in reply to: You're Celebrating Your First Chanukah As A Married Person #990574popa_bar_abbaParticipantNu, anyone have any good gifts this year?
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI wouldn’t exactly view it as a role reversal, if you told him you are ready to get engaged.
That is to say, if you frame it that you are proposing, it may be a bit off-putting. But if you tell him you want to marry him, and are ready to get engaged, and ask him how he is feeling about it, that seems like good relationship communication.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantIt would seem that Mr and Mrs Popa use that account because the way a lot of the stuff is written seems very male and a lot of the Halachic knowledge seems like it comes from a male.
No, I’m just a “Yentel”.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantIt is up to beis din to witness the conversion and sign the teudah.
Well, I assume that is why we call them ????!
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Oh, right.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI refuse to ask the obvious question. You’ll just have to answer it.
Why is my daughter the shabbos abba? My daughter doesn’t go to a coed nursery, chas v’shalom. So they have one girl be the shabbos abba and one be the shabbos ima.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantI have confidence that our dear friend Popa, whose own absurdity I was responding to, understood the point I was trying to make.
I didn’t realize you were being absurd. I thought you were being serious, and I agreed.
🙂
popa_bar_abbaParticipantSo we agree that the beis din must make a case by case determination of whether the candidate intends to keep the entire torah.
So at what point would you say a beis din should invalidate itself, and realize that they are not doing a good job of it?
For example, if I was trying to build washing machines, and many of my washing machines didn’t work, at some point I would determine that either the method I am using is bad, or that I am simply not good at making washing machines.
So, what rate of “wrong results” do you think a beis din should accept before they determine that they are doing a bad job and should get out of the business?
Suppose that 10% of their geirim do not stay frum? Is that too much?
How about 20% (1 in 5)?
How about 30% (1 in 3)?
What is your tolerance level for that? Tell us.
December 9, 2012 12:35 am at 12:35 am in reply to: Does Country Yossi magazine still feature the coffeeroom…? #911525popa_bar_abbaParticipantThe editor should bump the thread that is used, so we all know.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantBut there’s no halachic basis for rejecting converts who say they accept everything (and who have a sponsoring rabbi to vouch for their observance).<e/m>
First I thought you were saying we are supposed to accept as a ger anyone who “says” they will accept everything. That is obviously not correct.
But then you qualify by saying “and who have a sponsoring rabbi to vouch for their observance”, by which I suppose you are adding that we are supposed to also determine that they probably are going to actually accept everything.
So then we agree. And we should also agree that if a certain rabbi has been vouching for candidates and is obviously terrible at it based on his track record, we should stop accepting his vouchers.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantPopa, Dayanim don’t have ruach hakodesh.
Of course not. But they do need to be reasonable. I once asked a certain clown who is involved in geirus what rate of recidivism he would accept before concluding that his standards were obviously off. As a baseline, I asked if a 10% rate was too high.
He responded that he agreed that if 1 in 10 were going off, there was obviously something wrong with his system and that geirus should be curtailed sharply. But then he said, that if so, there would be no more geirus because even the B”Datz doesn’t have a 90% success rate.
Well, I agree with him on the first part, and agree with him on the second part. And therefore think geirus should be sharply curtailed. Maybe 1 in a thousand should be accepted.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantIf I understand correctly, there are even people now who will claim that if one ger converted by a rabbi goes off the derech, then all the gerim ever converted by the rabbi are considered invalid converts! Madness.
Actually, I think that is the least mad way of doing it.
Because, I imagine the determination goes by what was in everybody’s minds at the geirus. So that devarim sh’believ einum devarim, and if the dayanim made a proper determination, then anything that happens subsequently is not relevant. So we must be deciding that this dayan doesn’t make proper determinations. So then the dayan is the one who is passul, and of course you can’t rely on any of their geirus.
I really think this whole issue is overblown anyway. In 20-30 years, there will have been a decisive split, with Avi Weiss and co. going one way, and orthodox judaism going the other way.
That’s the way Orthodoxy works in the past couple hundred years. Every other generation, you need to clean up the ship.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantBetter question is if Og’s kids are allowed to eat meat. Since they didn’t save the animals.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantSo would Not covering your hair be considered part of this?
I would think so. Since it is well accepted by everyone that it is an issur. Even that article by Rabbi Professor Broyde was written as a limud zchus, and in not intended to mean that he thinks that is the halacha (as is clear in the article; I read it).
A funnier question would be something which is a machlokes. If a ger says he will only wear Rashi teffilin, would Rabeinu Taam consider the geirus bad? That sounds weird. But I don’t really see why not.
December 7, 2012 2:49 pm at 2:49 pm in reply to: Yasher Koach to Rabbi Horowitz of Project Yes, for protecting and not punishing #912477popa_bar_abbaParticipantWhen the court convicts
Will you still maintain innocence?
Won’t change much in my mind. I’ll still not know.
In case y’all are wondering. Juries in criminal cases convict something like 95%. That doesn’t necessarily mean there is something wrong with the system though; it really just means that there are so many steps before the jury where the innocent people are let off by the prosecutor or judge.
popa_bar_abbaParticipantWho said anything about cross dressing? She’s a she. And she’s wearing a dress.
They use fake whiskey, obviously.
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