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Tums – I won’t post the obvious answer, but I’ll tell you I have just a small round light and a hand held loudspeaker with siren.
It cost me almost nothing.
Sam2 -“It is not a Jewish idea in any way, shape, or form.”
I don’t know about the future Geula, but going out of Mitzrayim -Rashi in B’shalach brings down the Medrash that only one-fifth went out! So this idea is definitely a Jewish one!
shmoel -“To get the bikers out of the way”
What happened to the bike lanes, where they aren’t in your way? And if you’re talking about streets that don’t have them, why does e/o complain when they put them in?
shlishi -That’s if the father knows how to learn. Maybe the guy should Farher the potential FIL?
lolface -“now that doesn’t sound platonic to me.
halacha, incidentally, reflects this to a degree. without parents in the house, it is assur for a brother and sister to live together for more than a week or two (the exact time frame is debated by poskim).
A BROTHER AND SISTER???? can you imagine? well halacha can”
I’m sorry I have to make a Machoh. It’s hard to tell the way you go back and forth, but it seems that you hold you can’t have a platonic relationship with your siblings. You will have to forgive me if this isn’t what you meant. But this is the impression I got from you. If this is what you’re saying, then you should know you are being Megaleh Ponim B’Torah Shelo K’Halacha. You know what Chazal say about this, don’t you?
You seem to be bringing a Rayah from the Chumash for Halacha. I just recently posted you can’t do that.
“as the most sensible person for you to marry would be a close relation, SUCH AS A BROTHER MARRYING A SISTER!”
You put it all in Capitals, like it is a Chiddush. Well any learned person knows this was commonly done before Matan Torah. I’m pretty sure it says the Shefotim were all born with a female twin, so they had whom to marry.
“now isn’t that fascinating? (puts a whole new spin on why touching derech chiba is, according to (i believe most if not all) poskim, strictly forbidden outside of your mother and father.”
This implies (again it’s possible this isn’t what you mean) that there is some sort of Yetzer Hora for your siblings. This is totally wrong!
This is what I got from your whole post -that people have Yetzer Horas for their siblings. From the crying part (Bocheh L’Mishpichsove) and from the Yichud part. This seems to be your agenda. If it is, you should know – this is totally Am Haratzos! I’ll explain why -the Gemorrah says they blinded the Yetzer Hora for Arayos, which damaged it to create no more Yetzer Hora for relatives. Also the SA says in black and white – why you can’t have that Chiba with others besides parents to children & kids to parents, even though there are no feelings, because we don’t come close to Arayos period!
mik5 -“The Talmud states that the Redemption will take place in Tishrei.”
Some say Nissan, as opposed to Tishrei! Acacheh Lo Bechol Yom Sheyovo. He can come on any day.
The Frumguy – True; but a lot do it anyway, just to be cool!
I think people would be more receptive to Sam’s post if he wouldn’t have used the word – relationship. If he would have posted that in some OOT comunities -some families are very close and their kids are friendly to each other, even when this is with opposite genders, this isn’t Ossur; most posters wouldn’t have a problem with this.
I personally think the parents are upset with the Shidduch because he is Chasiddish. So no matter what he does, they will find something wrong with it!
You can accommodate them or not. It depends really how much you want them there.
You can be friendly to your cousins without having a relationship. There is nothing wrong with this. Once you use the word “platonic relationship”, there is No such thing. A relationship to opposite genders is never platonic unless you are a Toievanik!
Tums – I have a proof -The Baal Hagada says Arami Oived Ovi (Avi). We know that he didn’t actually kill Yaakov Avinu, but it’s considered as he did, because he wanted to!
Mike C -Your problem is that you think there can only be one way in Yiddishkeit. You started a topic to impress on e/o that there is only one way. Your attitude has been very poor in acknowledging your shortcomings. Had you came here and said -While the Halacha permits getting engaged and married without a Shadchan inbetween, the preferable way is to use a Shadchan. If you would have posted this, I highly doubt most people would have criticized you.
Also, please don’t bring Rayos what the Halacha is from stories in the Tanach. Because if you do that, then people can say -What about Yehudah? I guess it’s Mutter to take a Zonah as long as there was a Shadchan inbetween. And of course we know this isn’t the case!
Tums – The saying is -There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole (military).
My interest isn’t to help you understand the Heterem, but to just let e/o know there is one. I do know the Rema brings down a Heter because of Sfek Sfeka. I also know the Chay Odom brings down the same Heter and says it’s because of Rov. Whatever the reason it’s Mutter is irrevelant. The fact is Both Pasken it’s Mutter. You decided that Chodosh has to fit into all the Dinim of Sfek Sfeka. I don’t have such a hang up. All I know -what they say is Mutter- is Mutter!
Don’t call it my Chiddush or Diyuk because there is a big difference between a Diyuk and something he says right out.
He says right out if there is a chance that the imports are mostly Yoshon, then we don’t care about the fact that the home grown stuff is mostly Chodosh. And this is the case in the US today!
And the reason there is a mistake in the Rema is because he brought this Shitta down as a Heter, not to argue on it. If he wanted to bring down a Shitta to argue -he would have a whole Areichos. I think some Printer moved the word Rov in the SA because it didn’t make sense to him what the Hagahos Maimonous was saying -so he shortened it, on a whim!
Mike C – Read above my post about should and have to. You just don’t get it.
Mods – Please Close!
MikeC – SEE MIKE it’s like this – Should and have to are two different things!
If the mother is Frum, most likely the kid will remain Frum.
By me -the exact opposite occurred.
Sam2 – Don’t get yourself all worked up about this guy. Here’s a guy who goes on Jewish?? chat rooms to find girls to marry?? and whose own mother tells him to flirt with strange girls -so what do you think any Rov will tell him? It’s Mekotzeh El Kotzeh. He has to change so he has to go from end to the other!
gimpelstrasser – Gimpie -I’m just assuming that your SN isn’t your real name, so it’s a Kinoy anyway. If you post that’s your real name, I’ll stop.
Ignore him and try to build a relationship with his kid. Most people who were exposed to religion and gone off the deep end is because of their Taavos. Their Taavos then tell him/her -Don’t worry about anything because there is no G-d. This is not possible to change with reasoning/talking with them. An extraordinary event has to occur for them to change.
On the other hand, the kid can be prevented from becoming this way. He can be exposed to positive things in Yiddishkeit and these can make a lasting impression. Don’t rely on the Yeshiva to do this, try to have this done during the rest of his time. Like invite the kid for Shabbos meals, etc.
Gimpie – I would answer -any going down is because I’m on the way up -Aliya Tzorich Yerida. But some are just going straight down!
Sam2 – I know of one Godol – Rav Kook. Can you name any others?
“I think Josh’s point is that we shouldn’t treat the Medina worse than we view the US government.”
Of course you have to. While the US hasn’t written laws to conform to the 7 Mitzvos Bnai Noach, it still wasn’t conceived based on Kefira!
mdd -“What would have been better, had all those frei Yidden gone to Paris or New York, and there would not have been a Medina?”
I’ll answer what the Gedolim at that time said -Definitely yes!
Some even said that Moshiach would have been here already if they wouldn’t have made the Medina.
Josh -“You have not made peace with a State in which about 1/2 the Jews now live within.”
Nor do I or any other Frum Jews tend to.
“The Torah community did not survive for 2500 years by spewing hatred towards the States they lived within.”
I spewed no hatred. I said I don’t hold of them and you shouldn’t take money or go vote or go to the army.
Now it’s treason to have free speech and this type of oppressive gov. is what you want me to hold of? Sounds more like Commmunist Russia than a democratic State!
Kids this is called bloging. We write in full sentences. This isn’t txting on yo cell!
Geshmakke Mentch – Why do guys always have to explain things to girls? He is obviously that type, not me.
Sam2 – What you can’t teach them things even if they are Mechuyav in them?
mdd – I was talking to Josh about his acceptance speech.
gimpelstrasser – Gimpie -Get off the net and get back to the Bais Medrash. The net is Ossur. You know that’s not what I wrote -“??? ???? ?? ???? ???”.
I said there are those who want to leave, but feel that they can’t make it if they do, because if they leave – all they will be able to get, if at all, is an entrance level salary and then they will have to live on a lot less then they are now!
Funny Josh, but when the world tells you very soon to just accept the UN decision that Arab Palestine is a State, are you just going to accept it? The Medina and their followers just want acceptance, but they don’t have to practice what they preach!
Not that I’m pro a Palestinian state, but I’m also not pro a “Jewish” state based on Non-Torah laws!
aries -“It is so obvious that it was all orchestrated and I was just a player”
Exactly, so when you needed to say the right thing, Hashem helped you. Being learned doesn’t mean you’ll have more Siyata Dishmaya than s/o whom isn’t!
Tro11 -“but if i put one down my throat and its positive then i could go to the doctor.”
Sure you could, but why spend at least $50 on the kit?
You said you have insurance -so that should cover going to the Doc, getting tested and any medications you might need. I see no reason to buy kits unless you have nothing to do with your money. And what happens if the Strep is negative, are you going to buy a Mono kit to see if that’s what’s causing the sore throat? You see we learn in school signs and symptoms of diseases, so we don’t have to test everything out there. So you might have a cold virus or a Strep throat or it could be Mono or other more rare causes. So sometimes it’s better to check things out by a medical practioner than “self- diagnose”!
Hello99 -If you want to say the Rema argues on the Hagahos Maimonous, that’s fine.
But to imply that the Rema held this to be Pshat in them or they themselves held this way is misleading to say the least!
The Quote from them which I translated above I’ll repeat in Hebrew – “Vyachol Lovoh Shom Mezorphas Sherubon etc.” Translation – “And since it can come from France which is mostly Yoshon it’s Mutter”. If they held that Rov of the oats had to be from France because there it’s mostly Yoshon, they never would have left it out. You don’t say “since it could from” which implies just a possibility, when there is a need to not only come from there, but that has to become the Rov over here.
I personally think that this was a mistake in the printing in YD 293. I told you that the Rema doesn’t mix Rov with Sfek Sfeka from YD 110:4. So he doesn’t have to hold Rov over here in the Dinim of Chodosh.
I don’t expect you to agree, but at least realize you are pushing a round peg in a square hole when it comes to the Hagahos Maimonous!
Sam2 -“However, I would not feel comfortable saying Lechatchilah that a woman can learn from someone.”
You’re talking about things that they aren’t Mechuyav in?
ZD – Rav Schach was no Tzinoi compared to you guys. He might not have been like Brisk against taking money and voting, but he certainly didn’t look at the Medina the way you do!
Sam2 – Is that all Torah or just what she is Mechuyav in?
Aries – You didn’t understand my post. I’ll explain -woman have to keep Shabbos -so any Torah regarding Shabbos they can and should learn. Not limited to, but including Mikra, Mishna, Gemorah and the Halachos pertaining to Shabbos.
Tro11 – I keep my profession private here in the CR.
Sure you can. But it works like this, you buy from a middle man, not the company. These wholesalers sell by the box. So you have to buy at least a box. So the cheapest box of rapid Strep A tests that I found are over $50. Some cost over a $100. And if it’s positive, where will you get the antibiotics from?
Areis -You can learn all areas of the Torah which apply to women.
And believe you me – these areas are vast.
He does and I’ll quote -“If not that the doors of the country aren’t locked and Rov of the Tevuah comes from a place where they plant before Pesach”.
Regarding the Chochmas Odom, one day when I’ll have the time BE’H I’ll look it up. Also, I did have a point about Rov from 110:4, but you didn’t Chap. I’m not going to explain it because these last two things are moot, because of the following:
In my first line, I quoted the Rema about imports and I really didn’t understand what he was saying. So I decided to look it up.
Here is the quote from the Hagous Maimonous:
“That Chodosh is Ossur in Chutz L’aretz, but from a Safek we should Not Assur since most grains are planted & rooted before the Omer. And in “Nodemendeya” most plant Shebolas Shuel (oats) after Pesach and even so – since the doors of the country aren’t locked (Imports) and they can bring in from Tzorfas, where most are planted before Pesach, it’s Mutter. But my Rebbe was Machmir on Barley because there are those that are planted right after Pesach or right before. But even acc. to this Chumra etc…”
IMH’O all the imports of this country will mostly be Yoshon. Some because they were planted before Pesach and some because of the time delay getting it to your table.
He says Klor that the Rov of the Oats was Chodosh and the imports were mostly Yoshon. I highly doubt the imports of that country was more than what the country itself produced and even so he says it’s Mutter.
I don’t know where the Rema above got Rov from -either it’s a printing mistake or they argue.
IMH’O the US is better than that case because not only do we import all of the 5 grains from elsewhere, we also have a surplus every year which is most likely Yoshon!
I know you will never agree with this, but this is what I feel is the Din. (Stam grain is Mutter in the US.)
And I feel now that this topic is closed!
Toi -“what did they do b4 books? vegetate? your idea only sticks to things that cannot be learned from experiance alone.”
It doesn’t appear as if you read my comments. Here I’ll post them again:
“Book knowledge is the knowledge of how to do something right. You don’t necessarily have to acquire this from a book.”
cherrybim -“Give me one good reason why you think that it should be free to the recipient?”
The same reason help is free for childless couples!
One reason a lot of people in Lkwd stay in Kollel is because even if they find a job if they leave, the amount they’d make wouldn’t come near what they are getting now. Because of all the gov. programs besides the Kollel check.
tro11 -“I’d rather self diagnose.”
Hey – me and you have something in common -I also like to self- diagnose. But then again, I went to school for years and I diagnose others also.
This is the way I would self- diagnose if my throat hurts. I’d take out my strep kit and do a rapid test, if I have one. If I don’t have one handy, I’d go to the Doc or one of these ladys in town who do rapid Strep tests. If I decided to go to the Doc, he has the option of doing a rapid test and/or a throat culture.
If either turned out positive for Strep, I’d start taking antibiotics. If it was negative, I wouldn’t take antibiotics because taking unnecessary medication can be harmful.
just an observer – “health- i understand that most people would not hire a single girl (in america or in israel)”
I’m glad you understand the point I was trying to make to the OP.
Tomche – Your OP is correct, but your conclusion isn’t. Since the Frum population has grown by leaps and bounds, there is a Crisis because so much more people aren’t getting married. Example -Nowadays they have org. called Bonei Olam and A Time, both are for infertile couples. What – all of a sudden we in the modern day and age have so many people whom can’t or having trouble having kids?
I’m sure the percentages haven’t changed, if anything they have gotten better. So what’s the problem -why do you need two orgs. for? Because of the tremendous pop. growth, there are much more numbers of people whom need help; same with Shidduchim.
Btw, I need a Shidduch!
PS -Now that I brought up these two orgs., I’d like to make a point. These two infertility orgs. are totally free to the recipient. When it comes to Shidduchim, perhaps there are a few that do it just for Chessed, but by and large most that are doing it expect or demand some sort of compensation!
MikeC -“There is someone who both parties are culpable to. This makes them less likely to sin.”
Oh yea, of course. Just like Yoseph Hatzaddik had the image of his father appear to him. Can you just picture it, you want to sin and the image of your Shadchan (I’ll leave the description of her appearance up to your imagination.) suddenly appears and invokes the fear of G-d into you.
I really don’t think so. If you’re the type to do Aveiros on dates, then it won’t make a difference if you were set up by a Shadchan or not!
I don’t like apple pie, but I do like cherry & bluberry!