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Feeling pretty. I was told for years that I have such amazing hair; hairdressers could not believe I cover it with a wig. No matter how beautiful or expensive a wig is, it just does not compare with being able to walk around with your own hair uncovered. Tznius also makes me feel like I just can’t let loose. I always have to be aware of how I sit, walk, talk, etc.
Ok. Maybe I shouldn’t be posting here because I’m a woman, but I have a question. My son became very overheated today outdoors, and vomited and felt ill and lethargic for quite some time. My husband argued that tzitzis only needs to be worn if a man is wearing a four cornered garment. I, of course argued that it’s a mitzvah. I hear the supporting arguments from everyone, but, now, after today, I wonder, if having an extra layer can endanger a child’s health(and you might argue that wearing it actually protected him), but he was wearing the neat zit, and realistically, it is like wearing a second t-shirt under the first. Is it, in fact, a mitzvah to wear it all the time, or only to “add” it to a four cornered garment, when worn?
Not quite the same type of giving something up, but years ago I went on a shabbaton from arachim in the mountains. We left too late and had to park our car before shabbos started, miles away in a strangers driveway and walk to the shabbaton. We arrived, walking, on shabbos, with only the clothing on our backs. People were so nice. They gave us pajamas, clothing, etc. It was truly embarrassing, but such a nice feeling to be surrounded by many chassidim (we are not chassidishe) treated so warmly, like family.
I know of whom you are speaking. While I would not mourn her death as another, I would mourn her not having found her way back to Yiddishkeit. I would use the feelings of loss and sadness as a way to strengthen yourself and your own commitment, which hopefully would be a mailitz yosher for her in shamayim.
Popa……. Huh?!?
Quinoa… Delicious!
Boil quinoa, add craisins, cashews, olive oil lemon juice, salt and chopped mint leaves… Very yummy, and healthy!
Why do you need to know who asked? The title of this website is the yeshiva world. Presumably, that includes tzioni yeshivas also. I took it to refer to yeshivish wold, but in reality, that’s not what it’s called.
I didn’t do it, but heard from others who have who complain about vomiting when they either eat too much, or ride airplanes, b/c of the air pressure.
I have felt the same way. Friends can only understand so much and have so much patience. I let a friendship go years ago when I saw one friend complain about how the second one was always unhappy, complaining. This second friend went through(and was going through) so much tzar at the time, I felt it was a betrayal of friendship not to be there for her. I lost trust in the first friend and dropped her because of her treatment of the second. Truth be told, though, only a therapist has endless patience to listen to tzaar. Relationships need to be balanced. Why are your friends frustrated with you? Is it because they want to move you to action while you are still in a place of wanting and needing to be heard and understood? Have you told your friends that you don’t feel understood?
About the website I mentioned, you can tell her that anonymously talking to other women who have had the same experience can be an invaluable source of support. First really be there for her and with her, though, or sh’ll feel like you’re just redirecting the grief and need for support.
Adorable, I had my first miscarriage (I had already gone for several sonograms) days before my sister gave birth. That was a really painful/mixed feeling hospital visit. I did not tell my sister until years later that I had any and she still doesn’t know I had looked forward to having a child close to the age of hers. Even seeing babies born around the same time as a woman was supposed to give birth can be a painful reminder for years to come. Time does heal wounds, though. The hardest time is when it first happens. My husband was very supportive after the first (I was depressed for two weeks), but for later ones, he feared so much I’d need support that he just pulled away. That’s when I found the website.
Tell her you love her and you are here for her in any way she needs. Don’t be afraid to cry with her. When I had multiple miscarriages, my best friend was so sad for me she began to cry and I did not feel so alone. Give her a website for other women experiencing fertility issues called fertile thoughts.com. It literally was my lifeline when I needed support. They have different forums for different issues including primary infertility, secondary infertility, miscarriages, male issues, advanced maternal age issues and concerns, adoption, etc… Almost anything you can think of. Good luck.
Oh my goodness, how could anyone figure it out? Thank you though. I needed a little bit of comic relief from recent events.
I know I’ll hate myself for answering first. I’m terrible in math, but I’d guess 4,000 inches (don’t laugh). A billion would be 100x that of a million, and a trillion would be 100x that of a billion, right? Please let me be right!
Correction. I’m not saying the boys are not moser nefesh or don’t work hard on themselves, but anyone who knows girls knows the efforts they have to make to put themselves together that young.
There’s more pressure on the girls to be ready younger, and as they grow, more and more girls are coming into the market. Girls need to be ready very young, set up financially either by parents or having their own means of parnasah at a very young age (how is an 18 year old going to do that?). The boys have the luxury of time, both biologically and socially. So there’s a scramble to get the girls set up and matched young. This scramble puts the boys at the advantage, when a person/gender is not as desperate, they can afford to take their time. The amazing thing is that it is the girls who are so pretty, make such a monumental effort to look good, work hard, behave nicely, and are willing to be moser nefesh letorah, who scramble and not the boys. I agree with you. It seems backwards.
It’s hard to say why they got and you didn’t when we don’t know what you went through. Maybe it’s a matter of “marketing”, so to speak. Their tragedy was so jarring and unexpected and I think the community connected to it in the sense that anyone with children, neices, nephews, grandchildren, was shocked into understanding how vulnerable all of our children are. So, donating is a way to help the family and give zchuyos to Leiby a’h when we were unable to help before, prompted by perhaps an unfulfilled wish to have succeeded in helping as well as being moved by all of our own fears and concerns for the safety of our loved ones. I don’t know how to ask this without putting you on the spot, but are you angry because you still need help? Maybe we can pool our resources of contacts to try to connect you to those who can give you the extra help at this time.
I understand the link, however, Leiby a’h didn’t die al kiddush Hash-em. He was murdered without anyone knowing at the time. The result of his untimely death is a tremendous amount of davening, learning, and chesed. His death brought about a kiddush Hash-em. That is his zchus. Maybe it’s just a technicality with the difference of time.
In terms of it being a gilgul neshama, who knows. It’s speculation at best, but if a person in their lifetime wants to have the zchus of dying al kiddush Hashem, shouldn’t they have that zchus in their current lifetime when they mean it, versus another, when they wouldn’t? Again, an emunah and bitachon issue.
Yes I agree it’s commendable, but to say his 9 year old grandchild was taken in what sounds to be in lieu of that is very disturbing.