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April 22, 2013 6:23 pm at 6:23 pm in reply to: Who To Trust in the Coffee Room #1066596

xx Impersonator
Member

jmh:

I actually wrote that before. I knew you wouldn’t believe me.

April 21, 2013 5:28 pm at 5:28 pm in reply to: Who To Trust in the Coffee Room #1066586

xx Impersonator
Member

I read somewhere (online) not to believe anything you read online. It don’t believe that.

April 21, 2013 4:59 am at 4:59 am in reply to: Your Report Card Comments #1030904

xx Impersonator
Member

Golem… Such an appropriate name!

April 19, 2013 5:51 am at 5:51 am in reply to: Full Disclosure #947807

xx Impersonator
Member

Mekabel?? Is that a Mod or YW employee? I don’t recall seeing that name here..

April 19, 2013 5:01 am at 5:01 am in reply to: Would you eat salmon tonight that was cooked last Thursday? #947315

xx Impersonator
Member

a mamin: how do you do your guests? Cooked or fried?

April 19, 2013 4:58 am at 4:58 am in reply to: Learning with the Yezter #947286

xx Impersonator
Member

tzaddiq:

Be careful. There were two tanaim that asked this question. Did not fare them well. (somewhere in kidushin-rashi too)

April 19, 2013 4:53 am at 4:53 am in reply to: Full Disclosure #947805

xx Impersonator
Member

And I am the Editor!

April 19, 2013 1:35 am at 1:35 am in reply to: 73, Is This Short Enough? #946804

xx Impersonator
Member

Att: “make your post shorter -73”

Do you know where I too can order such a stamp (or sign)? Maybe I’d use it in shule, when the chazzan goes off…, y’know “make your post shorter – Golem”. Same with the gabbai – mi sheberachs…

April 18, 2013 7:04 pm at 7:04 pm in reply to: Amusing Questions (division of the Joke Thread) #1020304

xx Impersonator
Member

Not really amusing, but I got a tzedakah letter claiming the father had three fatal heart attacks. I kid you not.

April 17, 2013 2:40 pm at 2:40 pm in reply to: Guaranteed results! #946053

xx Impersonator
Member

I’m looking to hire ladies, just recently fired. (hold it, did you donate yet?)

April 15, 2013 3:23 am at 3:23 am in reply to: Israeli flag flown at Ponavez? Why? #945216

xx Impersonator
Member

Silly people. It’s connected to a generator – wind operated. That’s all.

April 15, 2013 3:11 am at 3:11 am in reply to: Do I exist? #945189

xx Impersonator
Member

Of course I exist. Arnold Fine said (says?) so.

April 15, 2013 3:08 am at 3:08 am in reply to: Dikduk that drives me crazy #946414

xx Impersonator
Member

Sure. In my dikduk class we learned about Paul Bunyan.

OK poel & binyan)

April 14, 2013 4:13 pm at 4:13 pm in reply to: Are there too many seforim being published today #945324

xx Impersonator
Member

Oh no. Not one of my books will get tossed. Take a look what happened to just the preface to Vol. 1, it had the whole place here (hear, hair, hare) on wheels (“Can a Golem Speak”).

No, no – it’s going to be a bestseller. My (worthless) word.

April 14, 2013 4:00 pm at 4:00 pm in reply to: BUMP #945931

xx Impersonator
Member

They already paskend you can only bump where it’s the norm (i.e. NYC.)

we need a DEfender here

April 14, 2013 3:49 pm at 3:49 pm in reply to: Are there too many seforim being published today #945322

xx Impersonator
Member

Much, much too many.

And as I’ve noted elsewhere there’s these few more to add

The Golem Speaks Vol I

The Golem Speaks Vol II

The Golem Speaks Vol III

Echoes of the Golem

In the Footsteps of the Golem

Reflections of the Golem

Will keep you posted…

April 12, 2013 4:00 pm at 4:00 pm in reply to: The Size of Man #944968

xx Impersonator
Member

size of man? generally shorter than Golem.

April 12, 2013 3:54 pm at 3:54 pm in reply to: Ask me any question #945513

xx Impersonator
Member

so many people know me?!?

April 12, 2013 3:53 pm at 3:53 pm in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #945074

xx Impersonator
Member

Uh, Nu?

(if a golem could speak, it would translate to “hello, how’s everything?”)

April 12, 2013 4:18 am at 4:18 am in reply to: Ask me any question #945495

xx Impersonator
Member

What is my shoresh neshamah?

April 11, 2013 8:17 pm at 8:17 pm in reply to: Where is Shnitzy? #946204

xx Impersonator
Member

Oooh. I’m so sorry it took you three days to analyze my response.

You b’kitzur wanted to know what I was talking about? (oy vey, imagine have such troubling thoughts, three days straight!!)

ok, I’ll try (again, it’s like explaining a joke)

I was playing on NG’s comment. That’s all. meant no harm.

slichah

April 11, 2013 3:59 pm at 3:59 pm in reply to: Do I exist? #945173

xx Impersonator
Member

pba, no, according to some it’s only a dream. Hyper-theoretically (or whatever that fancy word is). If I were, those seven ways. I’m sure that’s why they say the mishna starts of with golem, but then switches to chacham, and ends with “and the opposite a golem”. I’m sure they say ’cause maybe there isn’t such a thing. no?

April 11, 2013 4:12 am at 4:12 am in reply to: Girls' Names #948075

xx Impersonator
Member

Golamah

April 11, 2013 3:56 am at 3:56 am in reply to: Why I Hate Yom Ha'atma'ut #944342

xx Impersonator
Member

147,

with all due respect, don’t you think Hashem’s holidays and chazal’s commemorations are on a different level than these ??? ??? ???? ?

April 11, 2013 3:41 am at 3:41 am in reply to: What should I do instead of lurking here? #944723

xx Impersonator
Member

ICOT, Sorry, I’m not a ‘someone’, just an unfinished golem. So of course you’re not sure. Maybe if you study the seven ways how to become one… (oops, there goes my secret..)

April 11, 2013 3:35 am at 3:35 am in reply to: How Was Vashti Killed? #944363

xx Impersonator
Member

Haleivi, the Undo concept was a recent invention, patented by Windows.

April 11, 2013 12:35 am at 12:35 am in reply to: What should I do instead of lurking here? #944720

xx Impersonator
Member

ICOT, how do I respond to that? “Sorry I wished..??”

But at least I added the suggestion to smile (pending medical clearance, of course)

April 11, 2013 12:32 am at 12:32 am in reply to: How Was Vashti Killed? #944357

xx Impersonator
Member

I don’t have seforim here, if I recall, megillah only states “ashem lo savo vashti”, she was baninshed. Rashi says “lefikach neherga”, therefore she was killed. Again I’m speaking off my hat, could be I’m wrong. (I am the …)

April 11, 2013 12:25 am at 12:25 am in reply to: A"T BAS"H and 5 Iyar #1066509

xx Impersonator
Member

And I’m just saying that if the Rabbanim Geonim who instituted this great Yom Tov would have known how much animosity and rift it causes between klal yisroel… they might have held back.

?? ???? ?????

April 11, 2013 12:16 am at 12:16 am in reply to: What should I do instead of lurking here? #944718

xx Impersonator
Member

“Read”

Oh, I do hope you get better before I put out my books The Golem Speaks Vol. I, II, III, Echoes of the Golem, In the Footsteps of the Golem, Around the Golem’s Table…

April 10, 2013 10:16 pm at 10:16 pm in reply to: What should I do instead of lurking here? #944715

xx Impersonator
Member

Whoops.

What a golem I was!!

I forgot to wish you a refuah shlaimah, b’karov!!

Feel good. Smile too, it can’t hurt (unless some medical complication r’l interacts negatively to your smiling)

April 10, 2013 10:06 pm at 10:06 pm in reply to: What should I do instead of lurking here? #944713

xx Impersonator
Member

Maybe get (or create) a golem. He cannot speak back at you. (trust me)

April 10, 2013 4:30 am at 4:30 am in reply to: Unofficial Official Coffee Room Rules #943680

xx Impersonator
Member

And that means… (talmud lomar..)

April 10, 2013 1:58 am at 1:58 am in reply to: Let's Talk About #943546

xx Impersonator
Member

We have spoken, we have made our stance very clear on this very pressing matter.

http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/copenhagen-conference

April 10, 2013 1:50 am at 1:50 am in reply to: Copenhagen Conference #1060818

xx Impersonator
Member

As their official spokesgolem, I’m glad to report, there has been an reversal of direction. Our council of climate control has agreed that there is enough ice in the farrukte corners of this planet, so that we can resume the normal season changes. We will allow for a spring and summer season, this year. Of course, we will be closely monitoring the rising CO2e levels of the planet, CFCs and any other unidentifiable substances in our atmosphere.

Thank you for you understanding and cooperation.

April 9, 2013 2:32 pm at 2:32 pm in reply to: Why daf yomi #943437

xx Impersonator
Member

If you daven more, then you get a better head. So you could still cram in two hours’ worth into one. (Torasan mishtameres…) But then again, if you’re learning you’re not davening, so you don’t get that benefit.

April 9, 2013 5:58 am at 5:58 am in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #945033

xx Impersonator
Member

What a golem I am, to have started this whole controversial thread… by speaking (oh, do I exist?)

April 8, 2013 6:03 pm at 6:03 pm in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #945007

xx Impersonator
Member

old man: Exactly as you wrote, the great people actually CREATED a GOLEM using combinations of Shem Hashem. No sleep, no dream. A real live kicking (not talking) human form. Kindly read what you wrote.

“Even for the believers..” – Truly, truly, I believe in everything Torah says. Includes Torah sheb’al peh.

(And why would you be fighting a golem? ??? ??? ???? ?? ??? ????)

April 8, 2013 5:54 pm at 5:54 pm in reply to: [closed] NOT #943090

xx Impersonator
Member

not a good idea to get into their cross-hears

April 8, 2013 5:49 pm at 5:49 pm in reply to: Where is Shnitzy? #946201

xx Impersonator
Member

talmud:

1)be careful! to enter into another’s conversation is to be a Gxlxm (really?!?)

2)What I am talking about? Read the other thread if a Golem can talk.

3)then read the “Boruch dayan emes” one.

4)then realize I’m just picking on NG’s spelling. (We ALL fall in at some time. Your hare me?)

5)we all need you – ???? ?????!!

April 8, 2013 3:18 pm at 3:18 pm in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #945002

xx Impersonator
Member

tzaddiq: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

April 8, 2013 3:03 pm at 3:03 pm in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #945000

xx Impersonator
Member

Sam2: You’re right, not documented, recorded. There’s a reason for that, if I may. One who is indeed capable of creating one, would not trumpet his greatness. ?????? ????. And yes Nitpiker, I’m aware of that controversy. But it neither adds nor detracts from the great stature and holiness of the Maharal. His many seforim testify to his vast greatness.

April 8, 2013 2:54 pm at 2:54 pm in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #944997

xx Impersonator
Member

I’ve no idea what the old man is writing. What Rashi?!?

Can one just laugh at sugya like that. Chayav – no, it was really patur, only in a dream it appears chayav.

Gemarah repeats a few times where tzadikim would create a creature on erev shabbos lkovod shabbos. (by holy forces, intoning the names of Hashem) Sure, one might laugh, a dream, they thought they were learning and creating, they dreamed they were eating and enjoying. Sure. And the gemarah sees fit to record their fantasies for posterity.

April 8, 2013 2:15 pm at 2:15 pm in reply to: Can a Golem Speak? #944992

xx Impersonator
Member

Old man: ?? ????? ???? ????. There were plenty of reported instances (of real ones)

Me? maybe I’m a Golem d’Rabbanan. (????????? ?????). Only a d’rabanan because it comes from a limud, ???? ?? ??? ???? ???. (really?)

April 8, 2013 4:49 am at 4:49 am in reply to: Good Forwards (Emails) #1059629

xx Impersonator
Member

Shticky Guy – VG

I would add – Only where APPlicable.

April 8, 2013 4:24 am at 4:24 am in reply to: Where is Shnitzy? #946199

xx Impersonator
Member

I didn’t either go on hear. (Actually, to be a bit serious, solemn, according to those in the know, one poster – obviously a favorite of many – is no longer among the living, scary thouoght)

But I am hear now. Actually I speaks..

April 7, 2013 6:02 am at 6:02 am in reply to: Rosh Chodesh April Nidche #942913

xx Impersonator
Member

What is far fetched? The beard or the thumb?

(whoops… seems that I forgot to preface my piece, to indicate it was solely an attempt at humor.. I thought my s/n would suffice.. What a golem I must be to have thought so..)

April 5, 2013 5:34 am at 5:34 am in reply to: How many times did you take the road test? #942817

xx Impersonator
Member

I passed b”h on my first try. The second one, however…

April 5, 2013 4:35 am at 4:35 am in reply to: Tzitzis in or Tzitzis out? #984349

xx Impersonator
Member

Rabbi Perfect- Why are you thanking him?

April 4, 2013 2:11 pm at 2:11 pm in reply to: Rosh Chodesh April Nidche #942910

xx Impersonator
Member

Since it’s “tzarich talmud”, I’ll explain.

(It’s almost like explaining a joke)

“Rosh Chodesh” means the first of the month (generally speaking Jewish ones). First of April is known as April First, fool day. Since it came on Yom Tov, we hadn’t an opportunity to observe it properly.

I suppose the character in the CR known as Popa (who is obviously adept at fooling people, pulling their bluff) has a field day, a “Chagiga” on that day.

This “shtikel” should be learned (and chazered) with an upside-down thumb motion, beard (if any) in the other hand (talmud-like)
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