truth be told

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  • in reply to: Deleted, Closed and Delayed Posts – What Are the Guidelines? #763427

    I’ll let other wiser mods deal with it.

    How about puting back the deleted posts until then?

    in reply to: Deleted, Closed and Delayed Posts – What Are the Guidelines? #763426

    You deleted the older posts and left the new ones? I find the new ones, when unchallenged, to be offensive

    in reply to: Deleted, Closed and Delayed Posts – What Are the Guidelines? #763424

    Thread was right on the main page. I would appreciate it if you erase all the new posts. Thank you

    Do any of these different posters have moderation abilities?

    in reply to: grandmaster??? #763430

    Seems like he left. Not to worry though, Clairvoyant has similar style posts. Follow him instead

    in reply to: Deleted, Closed and Delayed Posts – What Are the Guidelines? #763422

    You still have many more of my posts on that thread which can be deleted, since they drew the seven week later responses.

    It seems to be leaving it to one point of view.

    Thanks for responding

    in reply to: best of both worlds? #763165


    Sadly, there are many people who practice Yiddishkeit but are not excited to do so

    Thank you for responding.

    Are these fallouts equal (percentage wise) among those who spent some serious time learning in a post high-school yeshiva as with those who went to a good secular college at 18-19 and spent 8 or so years working very hard for their degree. Then spent several years working very long hours to be properly established?

    in reply to: best of both worlds? #763159

    The OP added “excited about practicing his religion”.

    in reply to: subtitle #771614

    Hey, aren’t you a high school girl? Grocery shopping today?

    Are different neighborhoods tailor made for different types of people? Or are some people flexible and will fit in anywhere, and some are inflexible and would not fit in anywhere?

    I think eventually everyone comes to appreciate and feel pride in their place of residence. But it takes time. And in the beginning, any change is difficult, particularly for women.

    in reply to: Sefiras HaOmer Issues #763200

    With Lag B’Omer, we say “miktzas hayom k’kulo”. Those who do not do the AriZ”Ls minhag, do not listen to music on the eve of Lag B’omer. Only after the day (morning) has begun.

    in reply to: BARUCH DAYAN HAEMES!!! #763638

    It means something good. Boruch Hashem

    (It can also carry a negative side, as BHO’s reelection chances may have unfortunately gone up)

    BHO is funny. “At my direction…” He opposed the war on terror. He actually even gave up the name. That was one of his first foreign policy moves, to stop “The War On Terror”. He would have offered to sit down with Bin LaDin and work out the differences if BL had humored himself with that game like the iranian terrorist.

    in reply to: Best Yeshiva Coffee Room in the World #763314

    The Yeshivos I attended didn’t have coffee rooms.

    I can’t imagine this thread going anywhere positive. I can imagine it heading the way of maligning and slandering Holy Yeshivos

    in reply to: best of both worlds? #763156
    in reply to: best of both worlds? #763155


    100 years ago it was common – even strongly encouraged – for observant Jews to be osek in torah and an intellectual field, but now it seems it’s either one or the other

    That is so incorrect. Lets go through the countries Jews lived in.

    Between 1880 and 1914 (The onset of WWI) between one and half and two million Jews came emigrated from Eastern Europe to the United States. The first generation did not have any degrees. They worked as laborers. (That was the big Shabbos obsticle in a six day work -week).

    The children of many of these Jews did obtain college degrees. However, how many children of these one 1,500,000-2,000,000 Jews remained committed to Torah. The unfortunate reality is that it was so so few. A very sad reality.

    Only in certain parts of Western Europe, which had a much smaller percentage of Jews was the idea of secular college education for Torah-true Jews a reality. But lets consider it.

    in reply to: best of both worlds? #763154


    in reply to: scared to get married #1063989

    snowy: Please get the book ASAP


    in reply to: Darchei Chanukas Habayis #762842

    It was beautiful and inspirational. I was very moved

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762916


    Bar Shattya:

    I had no intention of mocking (as another poster did) when I abbreviated your name. Was rushing. I apologize though (since I see someone else used it to mock).


    You may quote as many ma’amorei Chazal as you choose. It doesn’t make any of them relevant. Since its difficult for me to understand, please, if you have coherent argument, clarify it. Thank you

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762911

    BS: How is it that as soon as these “evil” people entered the Beis Midrash so much good came about becaues of them? They were obviously not evil. Evil people cause the shechinah to leave, not Give and Teach them much more.

    Rabbon Gamliel wanted them to learn elswhere, in other Botei Midrash, perffect themselves there and then enter. Isn’t that similar to the practice of many Yeshivos for older bochurim, that one needs a certain level before being admitted.

    newhere: Rav Falk goes according Rav Moshe

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762909

    Bar Shattya:

    You are the one deviating from the poshet pshat.

    ????? ???? ???? ?????? ???? ?????? ??? ?????? ?????. was said by Hashem when He was “forced” to destroy the Beis hamikdash. It finishes off “hameor sheboh yachzirom” – the light in it would have brought them back to good – Had they learnt, they would have eventually repented.

    By Rabbon Gamliel, the moment they entered the beis midrash, in the same state they were, all these great things came about.

    It is clear that it is not a state of evilness, rather a lack of reaching a certain level of holiness.

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762907

    With my gemara learning training to back me up i suggest that the amoraim did not argue as to the evil of not being tocho kboro, but rather they argued as too whetger such a person should be allowed in the bais medrash.

    On the day they did open the doors, and another several hundred came in, some amazing things were accomplished in one day! There was not a single sofek left. Everything was clarified on that day.

    How can allowing “evil” people in merit these accomplishments?

    Even Rabbon Gamliel didn’t consider it evil. He just didn’t allow them into the Beis Midrash together with which holy Tanoim who were able to revive the dead. Let them learn elsewhere until they reach the level of “tocho kebaro”, and then come join.

    in reply to: Kosher Marriage & Kesuba #762807

    Ask a rov. I think it is, why can’t she get extra money on her kesuba? The problem is if its less money

    in reply to: Using "self-composed" prayers for people facing serious tzuros #824334


    I now remember reading that Yated article about Harav Stein by his sons levaya. He asked his son, not the oilam (though I’m sure he wouldn’t object and would be happy about it), to “beht far di techter”.

    The Bach was unable to publish his great work for ten years after he finished it. He had a story where he did something which he hadn’t in a long time, fell asleep, and it was revealed to him that he wasn’t meriting Assistance in publishing due to neglecting this for all this time. He was told that now, he will be successful. And so it was.

    Instead of being upset at the Frum media, maybe we should look inward (if it is indeed Hashem’s desire that these Tefilos be publicized).

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762905

    I see keeping many chumrot as a problem if it’s on the backs of others.

    k but most emontionally stable peoples chummros arent on the backs of others. many peoples problems with other people chummros stem for there own ego….

    Good point as well

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762904

    If it’s beyond their level, yuhara.

    We cannot concoct issurim or even suggest “yuhara”. We need a component posek to do so. Otherwise we are responsible to be mehader Mitzvos and our observance..

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762903

    Bar Shattya:

    You’re becoming incomprehensible to me. Please re-write your point, in a way that all the questions have been answered. Thank you

    First clarify the halocha about “shok b’isha ervah” – whether it means between the ankle and knee or knee and above (which wont have any affect on length of skirt, since that’s due to a different reason of pissuk raglayim).

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762894

    To answer your question we might want to examine the gemara on 28a of brachos which says that Rabban Gamliel wouldn’t let anyone into the bais medrash if he was not “???? ?????”.

    #2, you may want to remember that on the day that when Rebbi Elozer ben Azaria became Nossi, and abolished this rule, many many benches were added to the Beis hamidrash.

    There are many many Mishnaios and halochos that were established “Bo BaYom” – which means the day REBA abolished the rule. how many Mishnaios, Midrashim, gemoros, Rishonim etc etc and learning forever was accomplished when that rule was abolished?!

    If it proves anything, it proves precisely the opposite of your assertion.

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762888

    The Mesilas Yesharim disagrees with you. “Hachtzonios meorrer es hapenimios”

    in reply to: Using "self-composed" prayers for people facing serious tzuros #824331

    I second what ItcheSrulik said.

    As soon as you give it to someone else, it isn’t their personal prayer. You fail to mention, did any of these Rabbonim who know well suggest you publicize it? Did they even agree that you should attempt to publicize it? Ask any of Rav Stein Shelitas talmidim if he felt you should publicize your compositions, as heart-warming as they may be.

    in reply to: scared to get married #1063984

    2cool4school: I’m very sorry you’re going through this. My assumption (or guess) is that you’re a deeply emotional person. Probably very warm, caring and understanding. (These things often go together)

    His book may just help you. Also, I wonder if a very experienced Torah-minded woman has written a book as well.

    He strongly encourages bochurim to be deeply involved in learning while dating. He says, he himself would go directly from a delivering a chaburah (sort of a shiur for his friends) into a date. It left him on a high, and more importantly, he was occupied with other things than his date in the time preceding his date.

    Do you work? Is there a project you can involve yourself in to leave you more relaxed – yet with your full personality – for the date?

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762883

    spending excessive time learning

    What exactly does “excessive” mean?

    I, probably among many many others, disagree with your definition of Yeshivish.

    in reply to: Used car #762537

    Get it checked out by a competant mechanic. If it dosnt work out to get it checked out, don’t buy. Hatzlaha

    in reply to: Anxiety-And Symptoms #795267

    Stomach issues are very common since the stomach has the most nerve endings. It’s real.

    (sorry no advice). Feel better!

    in reply to: scared to get married #1063982

    2cool: #1 Please read the book, including the one page intro. It’s seven chapters, less than 150 pages. A chapter a day and you’ll be done in a week. What is there to lose? There’s all to gain!

    I can try to repeat some of what he says, but I don’t know if it’ll be helpful or the opposite.

    Is it by every person, or only a specific person? Is it on date #1 or only when things get serious?

    in reply to: Anyone here into details of tomorrow's Royal Wedding? #762673


    You repeated some very valid points. The last one, which dosen’t fit, does not dismiss any of the previous ones you repeated.

    Better they should get rid of the royal family and give their money to struggling yungerleit in England and America.

    in reply to: Date Yawners #762954

    mbachur: Its printed in Hanoch Tellers book “Sunset”. Probably several other places. (He did have a very good reason though, which when his future wife heard it, she changed her mind about calling it off)

    in reply to: too yeshivish #762878

    How can someone be too yeshivish? Wherever you are in life, good for you.

    You are correct.

    Either way, what exactly does “Yeshivish” mean? And does too much of it mean they attended too many yeshivos?

    Whenever criticism is offered in an abstract way, where a behavior is not criticized on its own, rather the whole person is being criticized, I dismiss it. Each person must be seen on their own (in a case where it is our job to judge. When it isn’t..). People use code words when their critique lacks proper merit.

    in reply to: Irrelevant sources, In Order To Fool #762534

    there cannot possibly be a blanket rule on such a grey area-what if the man is simply nasty

    Ask your Rov, right away. Until you have a case specific heter, assume none exists. Its Just like all our other responsibilities, lets use Esrog as an example; we aren’t exempt until we have a case specific heter.

    BTW, Hashem decides what is or isn’t right/degrading.

    in reply to: girls highschools #762830

    Arent you on the way to sem?

    in reply to: Yom Hashoah…why do charaidim/right wing orthodox not "celebrate"? #762628

    The chief Rabbinate wanted Asarah B’Teivas as the date.

    in reply to: Blog Away! #762560

    Question: Other than honor, what good comes out of the “truth” revealing itself? Does the truth about the 36 hidden tzadikim who keep the world standing ever come out?

    The more we run after honor, the more honor runs away.

    in reply to: Is there a moderator for the moderators? #762515

    I think the mods should start clamping down again on the multiple screen name users, when they form tag teams.

    What is it you want?

    1. You want to bash the mods

    2. You want to silence certain posters

    3. You would like to be a mod in order to post your shtick, unmoderated. That way, the TRUTH will come out

    in reply to: Dream Chosson/Kallah… or Settle? #762015

    Yellow: Hishtadlus is still a chov. One must investigate properly, but as you mention, know and remember that He is the only One who can guide us. All others can be His meesangers.

    I’m assuming we are in agreement

    in reply to: Clarity? #761947

    MIA the second: Please read that book, it’s worthwhile and you’ll probably enjoy it. He gradually and thoroughly addresses the “feel” part. It’s way different than described here.

    I like your suggestion.

    in reply to: Clarity? #761946


    whatever needs to come out, should.


    some people say they knew right away

    Chapter two in that book quotes a lot of very interesting old Reader Digest articles. They’re fascinating

    in reply to: Clarity? #761943

    Dream Chosson/Kallah… or Settle?

    (I’m sure there are other great books out there, this is just the one I came across, written by a man with fifty years of experience in successfully advising singles– (into couples)

    in reply to: scared to get married #1063978

    What happened in the end? Please read my post on the other thread.

    Dream Chosson/Kallah… or Settle?


    He says butterflies, waking up in a cold-sweat, and anxiety by chassanim and kallahs are very common. They usually hit when making decisions for wedding halls, invitations, or while everyone around is celebrating etc.

    in reply to: Dream Chosson/Kallah… or Settle? #762013


    (I would still assume that hope is not lost. There is such a thing as a zivug sheini, as well as teshuvah. If is someone is shaken by this, they should pursue the book and get berochos, but not dare give up. Just my two cents.)

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