im in!

I understand if guys aren’t attracted to an overweight woman, but only wanting to go out with really skinny? is that true? Are average sized girls considered fat? Don’t they realize that once women get pregnant they aren’t a size 4 anymore and may have a hard time getting back to that?

I also don’t understand why people tend to set up the girls with the fancier clothing and better style. I happen to not be into that stuff so much. Honestly, I dress nicely everyday, but it’s not shabbos clothes during the week, yet other girls who I know who wear beautiful sweaters everyday of the week(which are fancy enough for shabbos), people look at them as being more put together and more frum and better people. Sometimes I feel as if I should dress for Shabbos everyday just so that I could get set up.

according to general population…people are considered genius if they get over 1500. over 1400 is also pretty genius. over 1300 is really smart , between 1100 and 1300 is probably your avg person.. under 1000 means you probably didnt study as much as you should or you arent a good test taker…

**these scores reflect nothing on actual brightness rather on luck and good test taking abilities.. IMO…

AGREED.

i love asking , what was your most awkward dating experience? but I am just outgoing like that! haha

AYC gave great reasoning. I agree with him/her…

I’m trying to think if one of my parents would apologize to me what I would think of it-

It definitely would make me respect them more for admitting if they did something wrong and it would teach me a great lesson that adults too make mistakes and ask for mechila even if it is to someone younger than them or of less stature- so I def think it is a good idea to ask them.. not so sure halachically if it’ll really count or if you need to, but it shows great parenting IMHO. But obviously don’t go overboard.. Maybe one or two things or in general something..

happymom- thanks. I heard that also, but there are some toms shoes that are vegan too but majority of them are leather soles. This is a big problem because I also know a lot of people who wore them on tisha b’av!

I think i know them tooo!!!!!!!!!!! mazel tov!!!!!

I laughed out loud.

whenever i get these texts or emails i just laugh and kinda get disappointed in the people who sent them to me. if they are my good friends ill write back- are you kidding me?? and they’ll be like yea its probably fake but just in case..

just in case what?!? just in case you die because you didn’t forward an email to 10 people in the next ten minutes???

How ridiculous?

I’ve learned to completely ignore them…haha

MP- you are an amazing person!!! Every time i read any of your posts I always learn so much from them and my respect for you keeps on growing. I am so happy the CR made it possible for me to “meet you” / learn from you. like other posters said- we are all here for you. letting it out must have been hard, but it’s really good to express your feelings and thoughts.

your wife is going to be one lucky girl.

chodesh tov everyone.

I am counting down the days for this to be over!! I love chicken and meat!! I’d say I eat meat at least one out of three meals each day. sometimes both lunch and dinner..

AYC- I did it!! It was hard but now I see that it is possible to hold back and control. I really hope to continue this and eventually we can all bring Moshiach bimhayra biyamaynu. Thanks for the idea

Sounds like a great idea! I think I am going to work really hard on not getting in a fight with my sister. This is really hard for me, especially with my situation… but I am really going to try my hardest to do that, B’N.

thanks. I totally agree.. just need to find the person to help

“Study: 1 in 5 divorces in the U.S. caused by Facebook

21 December 2009 @ 01:20 pm EDT

New research released Monday shows that Facebook is causing an alarmingly high number of divorces in the United States.”

I’m just stating the facts. Take it or leave it.

I’m done with this thread though.I’ve said my share.

my parents are more modern and don’t really understand the whole shidduch system.. they want me to hang out with guys and meet them on my own (like they met eachother)… they dont understand or want to accept the fact that I want someone more yeshivish who is learning… (at least for now)

Middlepath- I know this is weird to say- but you sound like an AMAZING guy!!!

I really always agree with so much that you say and I also have this “problem” and people always tell me- you can do things for yourself sometimes.. and i do, but when others need things- i like to help them out first- these things dont bother me. i think it’s fine. Yes, we shouldnt go to an extreme with any middah (take the middle path 🙂 ) but it doesnt seem like giving to other people the way you are is an extreme. you arent giving all your last pennies to tzedukah, and you arent giving up everything for everyone else- just everyday things which is normal and amazing. everyone should be giving up their spot in line if someone else seems like they are in a huge rush and needs to be somewhere really important. (at least that is how I feel..) You seem very yashar and I think you should keep up what you are doing and you wont have a problem in marriage…

a mamin- nicely said.

mike- one of the more modern rabbis from my seminary was (excitingly) telling the class how he found his friend (a woman) from elementary school on facebook and how they caught up with eachother and how nice that was… i was sitting in that class in SHOCKK and never looked at him the same. A Rabbi!?!? Rekindiling an old friendship with a girl from elementary school!?! BH he is happily married and i hope will stay that way ad mea v’esrim, but this is highly highly innapropriate and there are many examples of where it broke marriages, friendships, families, etc. – just google it… there are LOADS of examples and articles R’L.

Thanks i understand.. but not that I even shared so much personal info with the guy, but i just feel like why did he deserve to learn these things about me? I don’t feel violated, but just feel like something was taken away from me and i’ll never get it back.. I dont want to go through however many more guys it will take in order to find the right one, because I dont wnt to have a “relationship” with so many more people of the opposite gender. It feels weird. Am i being immature?

adams-

The fact that you are discussing this is amazing and I give you full credit for it. Very mature and I hope we can all help.

what i have learned from Rabbeim is that the struggles with money Jews have, isn’t because they have to pay yeshivah tuition, buy expensive esrogim and lulavim, mazos, shabbos food, frum clothing etc. All that money that we use for that, Hashem gives us is separate and isn’t included in our designated amount of money Hashem wishes to give us. Meaning the money we use for Judaism isn’t being taken away from our salary, because it is only there for us to use it for that. (It is like a separate bank account that we wouldnt have if we werent Jewish) So lets say God Forbid you would give up everything- you may still have a really hard time monetary wise, bc the money you spend on jewish things isn’t what is affecting the fact that you don’t have enough money.

I don’t know if that is so clear- I have it in my head and it’s hard for me to explain..

Also, a big key is to daven. Maybe your relationship with Hashem is fading and he is giving you this problem in order for you to call out to him and build a relationship…

Just some of my ideas..

May Hashem help you and your family and give you parnasa so that you can afford all of the necessaties in your life, and give you bitachon and strength to overcome this harship, Amen!

Got it. Yea also really tired… You don’t have to agree with me.. I don’t agree with you, but its all good! You sound like a great person and yid, and it seems like if you thought facebook (or anything) wasn’t good for yourself, you wouldn’t use it.. and if you don’t think it’s bad for you, then I trust you that you are doing the right thing by keeping it.

adorable-

I had the exact same thing. I would email him and no response and I would go to his shuirim weekly and one week I waited afterwards and asked him if he ever gets his emails- he told me that he has a secretary who screens his emails and prints the ones that aren’t spam or innapropriate (that should answer mikehalls concern about R’ Wallerstein using email)(also he said not to worry that she doesnt read them.. she just prints them and makes sure they arent bad) and he told me that mine must have got mixed up somewhere and I should email him again. So I did, and still no response. I understand completely that he is really busy , so I am not taking offense nor do I think that he is wrong for not answering me.. many times he doesnt get the emails..

But, since I really needed to speak to him, I went to another one of his shuirs and I waited until everyone left (about 45 min wait) and he saw that I was waiting there the whole time so he felt bad even though it was already really late.. and we sat down and spoke for 20 minutes and he helped me with everything. (BH he didnt have to go anywhere after the shuir..) My advice to you if you need to speak to him, then if you live in NY and can get to any of his shuirs, you should do what I did… He is really helpful and amazing and totally worth waiting for so long.