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August 3, 2022 12:15 pm at 12:15 pm in reply to: The process of asking for money for a wedding #2111748ujmParticipant
Mentsch1: In America the Kallah’s side is expected to fund the bulk of the wedding costs and the engaged couple’s startup costs for housing needs, etc. In Eretz Yisroel not; so it more or less is about the same.
August 3, 2022 12:14 pm at 12:14 pm in reply to: The process of asking for money for a wedding #2111747ujmParticipantWhy does anyone else have to know? Tzedaka is supposed to ideally be done anonymously.
August 3, 2022 12:14 pm at 12:14 pm in reply to: How to enforce Tznius guidelines in a Kehillah #2111746ujmParticipantDov, why do you feel it is better that way?
ujmParticipantOn a slightly related note, is a Hatzalah member (or any Chesed service volunteer) selling their Mitzvah by accepting retail discounts offered to members?
ujmParticipantOrganizations promote to potential charitable donations that they’ll put the donors name on the building or wall. So, clearly, donors are happy and looking to see themselves promoted in return for their donation.
ujmParticipantI always donate anonymously. If any organization publicized a contribution I made, I’d be very upset.
I don’t even like those online GoFundMe type sites that try to get you to have your name displayed online, with the amount you gave.
ujmParticipantI have the same feeling everytime I see a plaque with a name of a donor on the wall. Or outside on the building.
ujmParticipantMenachem made an excellent point. There’s no discernable Halachic difference between a frum woman putting up a YouTube video of herself singing than her putting up a YouTube video of herself swimming in any swim outfit.
ujmParticipantBaltimoreMaven’s approach, where the ladies dancing videos are kept on a separate DVD from the main wedding video, is pretty good. Combining that with only female photographers/videographers for the ladies, is a pretty effective solution. Obviously no men, including the Choson and other family members, should ever be watching the ladies dancing DVD.
ujmParticipantAvira, I would be interested to hear if you know of any heterim for photographers in this regard. “Shmiras Haloshon”, above, wrote that in Eretz Yisroel it frequently is the case that they hire women photographers specifically to avoid this problem. Yet, in America, that is usually not the case.
That said, my primary concern regarding videography of women dancing at Chasunas was the issue of who will be watching the wedding videos later. I made some comments above in that regard.
“Shmiras Haloshon” wrote that by him they skip the parts of the videos showing the women dancing, when the family watches the Chasuna video. That’s highly commendable, of course. But the professional video editing usually inserts women dancing and men dancing, switching back and forth between the two very frequently and many times. It would seem to me that it would be rather very difficult to properly skip the women dancing every time by fast forwarding it again and again and again. And even if you tried that, you’d still unavoidably see it the beginning of each time the video starts playing it, until you get to fast forwarding it. (And even during the fast forwarding you’d see it again in fast motion until you find the place where it ends.)
Additionally, let’s be honest — does everyone fast forward to skip those parts of the Chasuna video? Do most people do it?
August 2, 2022 12:36 pm at 12:36 pm in reply to: How to enforce Tznius guidelines in a Kehillah #2111324ujmParticipantCS, Hadorah: Had this been an old discussion regarding Rabbeinu Tam’s tefilin or a discussion on what bracho to make on various cereals or a discussion on what your favorite flavor ice cream is, the fact that the thread was from 2013 would not have merited your meltdown decrying why revive such a dated discussion. The issues are still present and applicable today as much as then. But since this involves the uncomfortable discussion of tznius, oh no, how can I tell my wife and daughters that their skirt is too short or tight!, therefore let’s bury the issue under the carpet and pretend everything is well in Holland and there’s nothing to talk about and no issue to discuss. Yet we all know there is an issue and it is the responsibility of fathers and husbands to insure that it is rectified.
takah: Why would you even think the problem is with the Rebbetzin rather than those she needs to correct?
ujmParticipantIs 614 a typo?
ujmParticipantSyag, let’s bury the hatchet. It’s been going on forever. I’ve felt at times that you’ve made unwarranted adverse assailings to me that were outside the issues under discussion. I’m sure you’ve felt similarly about myself. Nevertheless, I shouldn’t have taken this antagonism to unrelated discussions, and for that I sincerely apologize. I don’t think there’s any need for me to wait for Elul to do so. I hope you’ll be forgiving. I’ll try much harder not to make barbs in my comments even when I strongly believe you’re wrong on issues. Being human I may slip up again, but know even if I do that in my heart I never mean it personally, even if it unfortunately comes across as such. I love every Jew in the world with a full heart, even if conversations go awry or way off track into misunderstanding territory. I regret those comments rather quickly. To conclude, you have no need to ask me for any form of absolution or express any contrition; whatever imperative may have existed for that (if any), I absolutely grant in advance unconditionally. Thank you and I wish you and everyone, an early, shana tova.
August 1, 2022 9:19 pm at 9:19 pm in reply to: How to enforce Tznius guidelines in a Kehillah #2111133ujmParticipantYou need a good, strong, Rov who isn’t afraid of the gevirim and is ready, willing and able to stand up for Halacha.
ujmParticipantramat: Which country do you propose or believe will assume the US’ current role as superpower, within the next 25 years?
ujmParticipantMoishe, Jack, are you card-carrying Communist Party USA members? In Venezuela, Cuba, North Korea, Iran, Egypt and Russia they might jail you if you “watched t.v. for over 3 hours”. That’s called a political prisoner. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. If you think Democrats can get away with totalitarianism by throwing their political enemies into prison under the pretext of prosecuting the law, they shouldn’t be surprised when they lose the next election they’ll find themselves behind the slammer.
ujmParticipantWhat can be more entertaining than declaring she’d “consider it an insult” being identified as MO, “if it had a semblance of truth”… after having admitted she grew up MO.
ujmParticipantIf the Democrats attempt to make President Trump into a political prisoner with trumped up charges, they can certainly expect payback after the Republicans win next time, with Clinton, Pelosi, Schumer, Obama and Biden being arrested, incarcerated and charged with similar trumped up charges.
ujmParticipantAnd the result is the president’s party suffers political losses.
ujmParticipantYou’re not a woman?!
ujmParticipantCountdown to Lizzie being put on the unemployment line… 10.. 9… 8…
ujmParticipant… said the shrill MO woman.
ujmParticipantThis must be a terrible struggle. We hope you’ll be able to overcome it.
ujmParticipantBased on what the OP is describing, if a Ben Torah or Yeshivish person or Talmid Chochom has a son or children that are also a Ben Torah or Yeshivish or Talmid Chochom, then none of the criticism cited in the OP is applicable to him, since his child/children ARE like him.
ujmParticipantAvi: All Syrian rabbonim fully support it.
ujmParticipantA new third-party was created today, called the “Forward” Party, led by Andrew Yang and Christine Todd Whitman, with dozens of former Democrats and Republicans.
akuperma?
ujmParticipantBesalel: HaGaon HaRav Yosef Shalom Elyashiv ztvk’l was, also, a very nice pulpit rabbi of a small trailer Shul.
ujmParticipantWhy would it become a reality if it hasn’t been one until now?
ujmParticipantHaGaon HaRav Avigdor Miller ztvk’l was one of our generations Gedolei HaDor.
ujmParticipantReb Eliezer, it is my recommendation that you be appointed Chairman of the Federal Reserve Bank. 😃
ujmParticipantMenachem: These are mostly nochrim.
ujmParticipantubiq: Which questions of mine are you referring to?
ujmParticipantJack, hopefully, like COVID-19 and it’s everchanging variants often more severe than the previous, monkeypox will have newer variants with ever greater onshim for these deviants.
ujmParticipantI don’t want to share which one me and my three wives are due paying community members of, since GodolHaDofi will then start picketing outside every Shabbat that we are there.
ujmParticipantWhich neighbourhood?
ujmParticipantCH: We don’t accept toeiva “marriage”.
ujmParticipantRW: Because that’s what Hashem set and created during maase bereishis. It’s been that way since Day 1.
ujmParticipantIn any event, there are countless non-Syrian Sephardic Shuls in Brooklyn.
ujmParticipantThe SY shuls are just as happy as anyone else to have geirim. Their takana is only against members marrying a ger and against their rabbis conducting conversions. Nothing else. Geirim are more than welcome to join SY Shuls.
ujmParticipantWho needs conveniences??
ujmParticipantI differentiate between the Yidden and the Goyim who think they’re Jewish.
ujmParticipantlakewhut: The CDC recently, grudgingly, openly admitted as much, after covering it up for weeks.
ujmParticipantBesalel: The Tosfos Yom Tov attributed the terrible travails of Tach V’Tat to talking in Shul. Others have attributed various tragedies, including the Holocaust, to other specific reasons.
That said, your last paragraph is absolutely true but it doesn’t negate my former point.
ujmParticipanthuju: Six months will put it past election season. Apparently, then, there’s a silver lining to it, after all.
ujmParticipantAmil, do you have some connection to New York City?
ujmParticipantMenachem, I do not have my own opinion. I simply follow the Gedolei HaPoskim and my Posek, as I mentioned. And they paskened what I told you. You aren’t in a position to tell anyone that they cannot follow certain Gedolei HaPoskim and must follow the ones that you choose or identify.
As far as the second point, I very much deal with non-Orthodox “Jews” very frequently. And I can tell you with a great deal of certainly that a large portion of those who self-identify as such or are affiliated with Reform and Conservative congregations are, in fact, Halachicly non-Jewish.
ujmParticipantJack, akuperma’s point was that when the Republican party was new, the two major parties were the Democrats and the Whigs. The Republicans, then, were a “third-party” that nevertheless won the presidency.
ujmParticipantAside from that Lizzie would be disqualified for high office, or any office for the matter, even if she were a man, additionally of course there’s the undeniable fact that women shouldn’t be holding office or political leadership positions altogether.
ujmParticipantJerry Nadler had a frum education. He became an apokorus later.
ujmParticipantAAQ, please share with us that information.
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