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I find it curious that someone can disturb others on a bus with loudmouth conversation, and the victim is being blamed! While I probably would not have done what you did, Goq, I nevertheless totally get why you did it. This woman might have been totally unaware of how loudly she was speaking, but that doesn’t mean it should not be pointed out to her. The problem is that people who are so thoughtless (talk on cell phones in restaurants, have loud conversations in public, play loud music late at night, etc.) never recognize in themselves that they are doing something that bothers another person. And if they do, they clearly do not care!
I would have said something on the bus, more along the lines of, “I don’t know if you realize it, but everyone cannot help but hear your personal business.”
LessChumras — on target. We cannot be selective in rejecting the goyishe zahchen.
I grilled, because it meant my HUBBY did the cooking!!!!! And why not? We Jews were also given freedom in this country.
If there are siblings, geting something inexpensive for THEM is much appreciated. We just had my grandson’s bris today, and are touched by how many people thought to give his big sister a gift in honor of the occasion. She is really happy now, that she has a baby brother, because she made out like a bandit today. (Yeah, yeah, I KNOW that’s not what this simcha is all about…indulge me!)
For the baby, a nice set of books to read to him as he gets older (age appropriate for a baby), is a really thoughtful gift. We did a bathtime theme for one baby, with assorted hooded towels, washcloths, rubber duckie, baby shampoo, etc. inside a baby bathtub. It was a huge hit!
Now to deal with the saying no issue. I always believed that it is a good idea to give a date a second chabnce because people are not always themselves on the first date (so much pressure to be “on”). However, sometimes we just KNOW it’s not shayach, and there is zero point in wasting one’s own time, the time of the other person, and the money spent on the date, for something that CANNOT go anywhere. I was set up with many such guys in my day; one was hashkafically SO far from me, he took his yarmulka off, as he is accustomed to doing in public, even when I told him there were no anti-Semites around. My REBBETZIN had set us up, apparently she had not seen him since he was a boy and didn’t know he had gone leftist religiously. Another guy was so ill-mannered and boorish that I was ready to go home after ten minutes with him. I could go on, but it is not important. I knew these guys were never going to be right for me, so why go out a second time, had they asked.
For once, I am also with PBA. Get that TP NOW!
No. Nothing wrong with it, but I do not.
I believe one should always be cordial to everyone. Unless you have reason to intensely dislike them and feel the need to ignore them, if they were good to you when you were still married, you can be respectful and courteous, if not warm and friendly. Sometimes you divorce a spouse, but the in-laws still care for you.
True, but it’s rude not to leave a message, if the call is important to EITHER party. For example, a doctor calls a patient with test results, but no one answers. Sometimes the Caller ID comes up as Private or Unknown Number. The doctor could at least leave a message this is (First Name, Last Name) calling for Ploni Almoni. Please give me a call. The correct thing is to do that, especially if the call is important to the callee, who may not have any idea who is calling from an unknown Call ID.
MAZEL TOV!!!!!!
The call MAY have been important, but if so, the caller would have left a message. If it was not important enough to do so, it does not require a callback.
Mazel tov (did I say that already?)
D”Y I actually got a call thanking me for my pledge of $100 the previous year, from an organization whose name I did not ever hear of before.
I have reached a point where if I get such phone calls, I will no longer make a pledge, but ask them to send me an envelope and IF I am able to, I will send something. I get inundated with these calls, and I am of limited means to begin with, and now have the added expenses of the various repairs that were emergencies recently, including the checking of all and replacing of some mezuzahs. That takes first priority.
I kind of disagree. If someone calls you and doesn’t bother to leave a message, THEY initiated the call and they should leave a message or call back later. It’s foolish for them to expect someone to call back, “Why did you call me?”
You can take my opinion for what’s it’s worth. Talk it out with him/her. Also try to understand what it really is about Facebook that is upsetting to you. Maybe he/she uses it only as a way to stay in touch with friends and family AND NOTHING ELSE, and you are overreacting. It sounds like otherwise this person is serious to you. Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. Not without compelling reasons.
There was a story a number of years ago about a little girl who saw a dog coming down the block and ran across the street. Unfortunately, there was a car coming down the block and the girl never made it to the other side.
The dog is not as dangerous as the car. Be careful. “
This story resonates with me, as my own daughter who is terrified of dogs (with reason), did virtually the same thing. She was 9 or 10 and walking the two blocks to shul with my then 5 year old son. A dog came down the street (not a frequent occurrence) and she let go of my son and ran right into traffic (fortunately there WAS no traffic at that moment, or I would be writing a very different story). That is how scared she was.
Thwe reason for the fear is that we were under siege one summer by a pack of feral dogs, including dobermans, rottweilers, and German Shepherds. We never knew where they came from, but they took refuge in my yard, and we could not get the police or Animal Control to come for them. In fact we were told to try to trap them. WERE THEY KIDDING???????????? They would run off and return, at random
Anyway, these dogs were very bold and snarly, and one even came up on my porch and jumped at her. I shooed him away with a broom and a pitcher of water. My daughter was so traumatized, she wouldn’t go out of the house without one of us with her, for months afterward. We heard later that two people in our neighborhood were bitten by one or more of them, one of them VERY seriously, needed a lot of surgery. Not all dogs are friendly, even to an animal lover, which I happen to be.
Amein.
I am married to a BT, whose parents were fully supportive of his desire to be frum, though they were not going to become frum with him. Many families are NOT as supportive, viewing the religious “nonsense” as a betrayal of what they consider to be their good enough values and lifestyle. I used to think that was very wrong on their parts, until I put it in perspective. How many modern orthodox Jews feel similarly when their wonderful kids go away to E”Y and come back in Black Hats! Many of them view their children as rejecting their family values and traditions. And while it is not EXACTLY the same, it is sufficiently so to help me see what truly amazing in-laws I had, to have been so proud of their frum son and the Torah learning that their grandchildren acquired.
If the only men in the world available to your daughters were the sons of Moshe Rabeinu and the sons of Korach….”
FTR, the sons of Korach did teshivah and were saved. No?
And to answer Kozov, I still do not accept that the worst Jew is better than the best Goy. Not if his worst is REALLY heinous. It might be better to BE the lowest Jew (economically, socially, and educationally than the best Goy, but I don’t think that’s what was meant, though I could be wrong. And though we believe that Af al pi shechatah, Yisroel hu, depending on the cheit, he could be chayav kareis, and the Goy could be going to his chelek in olam haba whatever that is. I just don’t believe we should be so full of ourselves that we say stuff like “the worst Jew…” etc.) Hashem made Bnei Noach before us, and they also are rewarded for their 7 mitzvos.
There is an old food mill that mym mom O”H used for this purpose. Then she went electric with a grinder. Now I would use a processor and pulse to the right texture.
I just found out that I have been paying third party non-authorized charges for a few years to Verizon. There is a class action suit, but I was informed by Verizon that under the terms of something or other, I must go to mediation, not lawsuit. I have no desire for a lawsuit l’chatchilah, only to get back what was wrongfully charged to me and paid. Anyone else have this experience? If so, how are you handling it?
Poster, you are so NOT silly for feeling this way. We all need adult contact that is not work-related. What if you start a round-robin playgroup where the moms and the kids all particpate. Every week it is at someone else’s house, and the mom’s visit while the kids have fun. Supervision of the kids depends on the age group.
Between $150 and $200 or so, depending on what you need and where you buy it. There are inexpensive places that claim to charge 30 or so for the glasses, but in my experience, they have limits on the presciption (high prescriptions are not udner this category of lower cost), they do only single vision lenses, and there may be other restrictions. You get what you pay for.
Great idea….. the night of kedusha and kiddushin and tahara and yichud wiht all its meanings and we introduce the Chosson and Kallah with secular movie theme songs. The neshamos of the previous doros of family who come to the Chassunah must be thrilled! The neshamos of the living must be overjoyed! Just like the music from Gan Eden. “
ALL the intros used in recent years for most Jewish weddings (I have not been to too many chassidish, so I cannot speak to that), have been SECULAR music. Od Yeshama is used to bring in the Chosson for badeken, and Vayehi Beyeshurun melech is used to take the chosson and kallah back to their table. The secular movie music happens to be exciting and powerful. They do not have lyrics. So what is the big deal? I would not be surprised if Jews composes those melodies.
Hi, Best Bubby, good to see you posting. I don’t think your idea is so off the wall. I use the Well-Done to get stains off countertops and plastic storage containers. I use Tilex to get mildew off shirts that were left in the hamper too long, by mistake. We have to be inventive.
I know some wonderful frum kdis whose parents are very messed up (the mom in particular), but those kids are amazing. I also knwo 8 kids from the same wonderful family. 7 of them are amazing, frum, delightful young adults. One went OTD. it is dangerous to make assumptions about why this happens. There are many factors at play. In the case of the one child, much had to do with things occurring in his Yeshivah, the same one his brothers went to and which was a wonderful, nurturing environment for the others, but not a good place for him.
I think that Shmoel’s post intentionally or not, reflects an elitist idea that many Jews hold, because they take the expression that Jews are superior to non-Jews as an all or nothing idea. Jews are superior in a spiritual sense, our neshomas have something extra with which Hashem has gifted us. But the lowest Jew IMO is not better than the best non-Jew, if by low we mean scrum of the earth (and R”L there are such Jews). Levi Aron, is not better than a morally pure non-Jew who saved Jewish lives during the Holocaust. His Jewish neshoma has the potential to make him better, but he chose to ignore that potential and be a rasha. I will take the Goy over him anyday.
If you use the processor (I have when I made a huge amount), make sure to use the pulse control, otherwise it will be TOO fine. And yes, you can trhow in carrots, peppers, celery, and onion (some even add hard-boiled egg) along with the mayo, and mish it all together at one time.
No it’s not fair, but true menschen do NOT do that and people who do are not good shidduch material anyway.
Are you looking solely for Jewish music? If not, the themes from “Superman” or “Raiders of the Lost Ark” are great,
Ok, I just watched Part 1 of Rabbi Student’s lecture. He is a really noteworthy speaker, and I agree with everything he said, though he certainly does not need my endorsement.
Shmoel- the lowest Yid has the spiritual potential for greatness, more than a non-Jew. But to say that the lowest Yid is higher than the best Goy, is a remark that requires scrutiny. I know some non-Jews who will ALWAYS be better than some Jews whom I know. The sad fact is that Hashem gave Klal Yisroel a matana, and not every Yid makes proper use of it, or even appreciates it. Many non-Jews are fine, eidel, and kind-hearted people, who live a moral and caring life. Would you consider them to be lower than any Yid, even a murderer or pervert, simply by virtue of their non-Jewish status?
Thank you, Yitayningwut, for the suggetion.
I also like to mash tuna in a ziploc bag. MUCH neater. I used to (MANY years ago) chop the tuna in my Bubby’s old wooden chopping bowl with a hand chopper (looked like an axe with a handle). A pastry blender would do the same job, or even a potato masher.
Wow this thread just brought back some amazing memories to me. My dad, O”H would make school lunches for us whenever my mom O”H was in the hospital having a baby. he would chop up the tuna, add the mayo, and then spread the tuna on the bread. THEN he would put something totally off the wall in the sandwich, like say, peanut butter, babana slices, or raisins. When we would protest this sacrilegous ruin of a perfectly good tuna sandwich, he would remind us that our stomachs didn’t care what was mixed together when it all got down there, and that tuna is healthy, peanut butter is healthy, and fruit is healthy, so we should be happy we had a well-rounded healthy meal.
lemonysnicket – hope we helped. Also hope to hear besoros tovos from you at the right time!!!
oomis: I’m sorry to tell you this, but that is not a good proof. It is very easy to browse without leaving a history, as well as to delete specific things from the history. “
Thank you for this information, of which I was unaware.
oomis, firstly, as I stated in my OP: “I have to wear gloves” and even then, if a tiny bit gets on my sick, it starts turning white and burning.” And secondly, I dont have a hubby and if I did, I wouldnt tell you cause that would be Assur! But if I had a wife, I hope she will spray them cause Im going bezerk!!!! But thanks for the sugs! “
Your’e reight, I forgot thast you mentioned the gloves in your OP. I made the very female chauvinistic assumption that you are a lady. Sorry for the mistake, because you were doing the laundry. My bad. I learned a lesson today. In any case, I would wear extra long rubber gloves, not just the latex surgical type. Mayeb you need to use Dreft or some other type of gentle non-allergenic detergent.
Lots of wisdom here in the CR today. Yossi Z, – well put.
Firstly, wear gloves as your hands are sensitive. Second, gey your hubby involved in this, too, if it is so time-consuming, or send the shirts out and let someone else deal with the issue.
Laundry is what I do in between everything else.
10)five tines on a fork
27) the last word is “beings” (thanks for the first several)
“but don’t let the kids out of your sight.”
That has always been my practice, and very sound advice whether in reference to kosher food or kosher internet use.
BTW, people should routinely delete their browsing history. And because the Yetzer Hara is so strong, parents must be responsible and give their kids the tools from a very early age, to help them avoid such pitfalls.
How is a Kollel guy supposed to support 37 mouths (His 5 daughters and Son-In-Laws , 25 grand kids , himself and his wife)”
Excellent point!
28) 64 seats on a commuter bus?
12) 3 blind mice (see how they run)
10) Five Towns on a Friday (yuck!) ?
19 and counting….
5) 66 Books of the Bible
23) 13 loaves in a BAker’s Dozen