Always_Ask_Questions

Tangental, but Chanad Fredrike Rebbe quotes a mill owner in 17th century who would run after a peasant to return several perutot saying that mabul was because of stealing pess than perutah, he does not want to be worse than that. I am quoting this story rather than the midrash itself to emphasize that this is how tzadikim used to understand this. Maybe it was in generations where other issues did not apply.

Agree with a lot of posters here:
Fair statement about people being meikel because they simply disregard halakha and also about being meikel with chochma often helps.

Totally disagree that someone who learns whole life gets in a better olam habo. For example, Issachar/Zevulun partnership means that both get the same one, as far as I know. So, anyone who works and support the other one (either directly or pays full, or close to, tuition at Jewish schools thus supporting both those who teach and who do not pay much) should get a share of each person they support. I don’t know hw olam habo maths work, but this can add up to a bigger share.

But biggest issue is – meikel/machmir in what? If the Yoshon Reuven above is also a baal chesed, tzedokah, davens w/ kavana, etc, this is one thing, but if he is not a good husbanf, father, neighbor, co-worker – then not.

Had gadya?

RebE > The IDF killed a terrorist who was slaughtering a cow for his own wedding in broad daylight.

this is better, but still ambiguous: what was in board daylight – IDF, slaughter, wedding. If the wedding was planned in board daylight, then the other events might have happened at narrow moonlight. Also, not clear why the breadth of the daylight is relevant to the two slaughters animals.

> were “trained” in the English-studies programs of our yeshivos

this is not fair. Headlines in other sources are no less misleading! I suspect that there is a special program for headline writers, as this is the main source of clickbait revenue, articles themselves are not that important.

Yabia, I agree in general, but more likely Ashkenazim descend from a small group of people, so their mesorah is simply is not representative of the broader tradition. Then, from times of haskala, we started relying on printed and, recently, on Roshei yeshivos to enforce uniformity at further loss of diversity of mesorahs.

Sfaradim (a loose term that usually includes everyone else) are not one mesora, they are multiple mesorahs, probably almost as different from each other as they are from Ashkenazim.

phil, we need to be more specific when protecting against the missionaries. What exactly we should point in KJ to highlight their problems?

As many noted, probably a majority of the government faction are shomer shabbat.

So, now comes the challenge – as the whole world looks with a magnifying glass at Am Isroel – will they see am kadosh venavon or will they see infighting and hillul Hashem? One of the haverei knesset is quoted as saying to a loser: “we will treat you fairly, we are not animals like you”, which is encouraging sans the comparison…

So, if davening for election results or skipping tachanun may or may not be appropriate, davening for the new government to be wise and honorable is certainly appropriate.

let’s continue with the daf! Nedarim defines rasha/tzaddik in the following way: how responsible is a person with his words. A rasha tends to make nedarim (to motivate himself) – high-stake promises that cause complications, such as when an animal dies, you need to find another. A tzadik does nedava – dedicating a specific animal, and if something happens with it, the nedava is gone. The best way is to take the animals to the doors of BM and do nedava right before entering. No risk of false promises.

To extrapolate, a tzaddik thinks thru all practical implications of his decisions and talks and acts accordingly. A similar business concept is called “managing risks” rather than embracing it “bravely”
(aka foolishly). So, if you organize your life and what you do for others in a right way, you are a tzaddik. How do you achieve that is immaterial – if learning tosfos brings you there, shoin. If Ben Ish Hai stories teach you common sense, tov meod.

yungerman,
it is ok to teach alef beis after you learned alef beis (heard from R Shapiro Z’L). A corollary – do not teach alef beis before you learned it!

Similarly, here the point is that only after a person realizes his own deficiencies, tries to fix them, and realizes how hard it is, he is ready to thoughtfully approach other people. Otherwise, you’ll have a silly person who did not examine his own middos pompously telling others how to live their lives.

Apparently, it is not the first time, Jews are bending curriculum to make sure we are different from the opposition. We used to have 10 commandments as a central part of service, and now it is an optional personal reading. We started insisting that we focus on mitzvos v. emunah in opposition to christians … and now Nach because it was/is misused by Maskilim/Israeli public schools. It may be fine for general education, but learned people should understand better. Otherwise, as we hear here, suddenly so many books that Hashem ordered for us become “non-essential” in some minds. If Hashem meant to give us Bavli, he would have done it.

Exercise, like learning or working, does not need to be a chore and it is fine to enjoy it.

Yitz, Sam,
good points. Maybe he means that the person needs at least appreciate the magnitude of the task – and consider how hard it is for yourself – before taking upon the task of helping others?

Probably Bavel with Jewish community existing for ~2500 years, uncluding Naviim, Amoraim, Gaonim

J4B > Should we not suggest solutions to problems because we will always have our own problems?

a great question. I recall halochos of tochacha say something similar – one should not reproach others when they have problems in the same area. That is, OK to do that in areas you are a tzaddik. R Salanter, seems to be taking a more “holistic” approach. Besht uses a similar approach saying that one can not use permissible ways to “change his words” if he really lied at least once in his life (this is quoted on the last page of the thin book “Lying for truth” after listing all permissible ways – quoting it on the first page would have made it even thinner).

a good idea to get a dashcam. Then, you’ll be able to review your behavior. Also, there are apps that record phone accelerometer. Count of times you had to break at high-g is a good predictor of your chance of getting into an accident. So, if your count increases over time or is higher than your peers, you need to change how – or where, or when, or whether – you should drive.

phil > so are you trying to say that for various reasons it’s ok

I am not paskening in this forum in the presence of so many gedolim. What I am saying, that I can imagine K’s Rav telling K that he can attend a certain event under certain conditions. This does not mean that the Rav will be calling the whole shul to attend all events regardless…

As an example, I was once invited by a Reform “Rabbi” and a female clergy to assist them in a “mitzva” of affixing a “mezuza” to a “Jewish” family of “immigrants”. I am running out of quotes … l’tzad zhut, maybe they were marronos, but the clergy was not bilingual enough to figure it out anyway. I was ready to politely reject the offer, but then decided to bother a local (chasidishe) Rav and ask him. To my shock, he suggested that I go. And to my further shock, I actually went… I won’t bother you with details of his reasoning, this was particular to the case, but this is an illustration of how strange psak might be.

Or use a phone siddur that does reminders. At least on a day you feel you need a reminder.

The final message from the President before the election seems to be – “it is someone else’s fault”. Looks like giving such a speech before an election, reminding voters that (1) prices are high (2) he will always blame others will be as successful as predicting longevity of Afghani government.

Learn from others: some fancy corporations, like Google, built fancy game and dining rooms, claiming that their employees love to stay at work and use those. Now that they let employees work from home, the managers are not able to convince employees to come back to the fancy game rooms. Turns out, employees would rather stay at home and play in their own game rooms.

The lesson might be: content of your yeshiva should be the reason to stay there.

to search in google:
bar mitzva site:https://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom

We all may be underestimating breadth of halachik opinions. I just got a newletter with a shaila about gnevat daas trying to encourage customers to give more tips by pretending others did so! They asked 4 (four) poskim and all gave different answers – asur, mutar, improper, can do it if not so obvious. The one who said “asur” then agreed with the one who suggested making it no so obvious. Possibly same here. Presuming Kuvult has a serious Rav, he might have good reasons to permit. Maybe he takes into account Kuvult’s tzidkus that all of them are like white geese (as w/ R Yohanan) or his failing eyesight, or that his wife may make his life impossible and he will not be able to learn for a week. We don’t know and it is aint our business. Ask your Rav and possibly he’ll tell you to never do it based on how he saw your glances towards the mehitza during davening.

I understand the issue is important, but why two threads!?

Ujm, I am reluctant to read research on this topic, but could you check whether they traced these numbers through time and countries? Making a behavior normalized might increase number of people who follow it. The more teachers put they as their pronouns, the more kids are following them.

I got warnings several times when I fully admitted that I was wrong, saying something like – I drove here for years and knew where you are hiding, but still pressed the gas too strong! (the road goes down there right after a turn).

In another case, long time ago, while driving in a different state, a policeman pushed behind me in the left lane in an unmarked car at night and when I accelerated to let him go, he ticketed me. I wrote a nice letter to the judge with a map of the location and all details – and the case was dismissed. I am thinking: if a policeman did something questionable to you, he most likely did this to others also, and a judge would know.

In the parking case – mail in pictures.