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“Please let us know how many of them have never dated.”
Forget those 25+. There are a number who are perhaps 20 or 21 who have “dropped out” of the “yeshiva dating system” and have opted to try and meet boys on their own (which is becoming a greater and greater problem). I dont know how successful this is for any of them, but they feel that at least there is movement. I havent thought it through to say I agree or disagree with them (in theory – in practice I have a numbers of problems with this), but this is how they, the ones affected by the current situation, feel and are reacting.
As for those who are 25+ that we do know from the neighborhood, all of them state that when they were fresh out of seminary they also hardly got any dates. They do complain about the unequal shidduch scene and almost to a woman propose that a way to help resolve SOME of the inequality is for shadchanim to approach the girls side first. They are not concerned about rejection or bruised egos (which they hear – rightly or wrongly – is the reason for the current method of going through the boy first), they just want to know that someone is working on their behalf and hearing that they have a suggestion and that it was passed along is a positive that they would like to hear. The way things work now, they have no idea if their name was suggested to someone, or not, the lack of information causes panic on their part which leads some people to say, do, or even promise outrageous things to shadchanim. Soon those crazy things become the norm and panic driven parents promise even crazier things, all the while the boys are laughing all the way to the bank. Has any consideration been given to starting a shidduch from the girls side? If you have an opinion either way, would you care to share it?
“but the notion that 12 out of 112 simply are unpicked and never get any dates is just plain not accurate.”
Admittedly this is not a scientific study, but the above statement is contradicted by the sentiment expressed by a majority of the girls who enrolled in the seminary where my wife works. In “our circles” a prerequisite to getting married is getting a “yes” from a boy. Many, many girls express the sentiment that they wait and wait for that elusive yes and when they do get one, it seems like he was dragged up from the bottom of a barrel somewhere (hence the no good boy complaint). I dont claim to have any “solutions”, but am still wondering why there is a disconnect as to what the problem really is as stated by those who are offering solutions to the crisis, and those directly affected by it.
On the off chance that your comment about “strange guys” is meant seriously, how are the current proposals of closer in age marriage and starting to date younger serious attempts at solving the stated problem?
We should go to china and solicit males to become geirim. They have a reverse shidduch crisis where estimates are that by the year 2020 there will be THIRTY MILLION more males of “mating age” (the term used in the CNN story of March 4, 2013)than females living in China.
It is interesting to read the various explanations for the “crisis”. What I find most interesting though, are the words of litvish (my term for non chassidish where “crisis” isnt used as much) girls who are actually “in the parsha”. The most repeated line is “there are not enough GOOD GUYS available to date”, not that there are not enough guys altogether. Why do the girls not perceive the problem the way everyone else does? Are they in denial?
Also, it was written in this forum and also publicized in various advertisements, that there are (and will continue to be) hundreds (as much as 10%) of recent high school graduates who will simply never get married. Has anyone looked at those girls who are not married? Is there a common denominator among them? I dont want to make assumptions but will throw out a suggestion, is there a common denominator whereby these girls are from families who are unable to offer the support packages being asked for? Is it their looks? Brains? Personalities?
Lastly, what I would really like to see, more than an advertisement with signatures of roshei yeshiva (and the resulting claims of people misleading them etc…) are roshei yeshiva and rabbonim addressing their individual bachurim and kehillos on the hashkafa of the entire parsha. What is proper hishtadlus and what is hysterics. How to deal with and react to statement that appear under the signatures of prominent rabbonim that state, 10% of girls will never marry, or a statement which places the blame on the shoulders of those who do not follow such guidelines when it is abundantly clear that not all rabbonim or roshei yeshiva have signed on to such statements (a comparison of the signatories to the original age gap advertisements recommending closer in age shidduchim and the more recent advertisements suggesting bachurim marry younger illustrate this last point).
It may be considered a lack of kavod hatorah to learn shavuos, or any night, sans pants. I think one is not permitted to enter a shul sans pants, even if he does not plan on learning. Also, since many shuls turn the AC up high to help facilitate staying awake, pants would be a good idea so as not to freeze. Of course, a good stadium blanket would do the trick too.
“The shidduch process in our community works something like this: shadchan suggests girl, boy’s side looks into her, Boys side agrees, girls side looks in and agrees, they date, get engaged and married.”
If we could reduce the time from original shadchan suggestion, to final yes for an agreement for couple to first meet, from say 6 months to 3 months, we may be on to something as it relates to girls marrying younger.
I’ll take a wild guess. the mekor is the shla or his talmidim.
There are plenty of things on ebay that you should not see, would not want your spouse or child to see and would be embarrassed if your own rav saw you looking at. You are better off keeping it blocked.
You didnt tell us if this baker offers only white bread, or there is also ample supply of rye, pumpernickel, multi grain or spelt for those who want it? Of course there are those who dont even want bread, and prefer kaiser rolls or bagels perhaps french bread. Is this all available in this bakery of bakeries?
Bologna, thinly sliced.
YO Staten Island. Chaim Berlin. Yesodei Yeshurun in KGH. Miami. Vancouver. Rochester. Philly. You looking to run away to a dorm for high school? Looking to get rid of your kid? what is the obsession with a dorm?
“the kids will damage our property.”
when they do, call the cops. till then, put up a fence that will keep them out.
“Did you miss the part where I said I asked a Rov?”
As far as I am concerned, Rabbi Anonymous is hearesay and rumor. Rabbi anonymous might even be a very “big” Rav, but as long as he remains anonymous, and you remain anonymous, I have no right to accept what might just be rechilus. If this question ever becomes nogea to me, I will be sure to ask my own Rav. Rav Anonymous shlita doesnt cut it for me.
Put up a better fence.
“but they don’t have Tzaddikim stories”
Yes they do. Only they don’t call them Tzadikim, they call them saints.
The bigger question is, why would you want to?
Who cares?
How many 80 year old beliebers are there?
Just because it is sold in a “seforim store”, doesnt make it a sefer.
“How can they make a claim like this?”
As long as the print and electronic media sources are willing to take their money for the ads, and for as long as people respond to their ads by sending donations, they will not change their tune.
Hmmmmm…… I hope I wasnt nichshol the whole shul at my shabbos bar mitzvah when I lained shiras devorah.
“Your last sentence is dangerously close to what’s in the NT, Mark 7:18-23, more specifically to Mark 7:20. You shouldn’t be sounding like you’re quoting the NT.”
Actually, I am paraphrasing the sponsor of a Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation publication. This particular sponsor is a well known kashrus agency and by way of explaining why they felt it important to sponsor the publication, they used this line. If you feel the use of such a line in this context is inappropriate, contact the CCHF and tell them. While I consider myself educated, I am not able to cite chapter and verse from the gospel of mark the way you can. I submit to your superior knowledge in this area.
Straightforward? “e-mail it to my Rav HaMachsher, who shall remain nameless & works @ the /cRc.” this is not straightforward, this is heresay, at best. Ask your own Rav.
Mature conversations do not hinge on hereasy and rumor?
Again with the assumptions. Not all those who certify products or establishments arre into marketing campaigns. Those who need to know who they are, they make sure they know. As for the op, perhaps she got a call back and all her questions were answered and alll accusations about secrecy can go out the window. As for the crc list not being listed is no proof of reliability. Is every reliable hechsher in america in “the list” or in “the app”. It means further investigation is required. I’m wondering how someone who is apparantly so strict about everything that goes into his mouth is so flippant with the comments that come out of it?
I dont know about speech, but reading these boards is obvious they know how to use a keyboard.
you could leave early
there you go again with “the credentials”. you assert yet again that this particular agency doesnt work with other agencies and is not reliable because they dont publicize their relationship with other agencies or name their posek on their website. I have news for you, neither do most kashrus organizations. these people are not hiding. you can call them up and ask them for whatever credentials you feel are appropriate and if you like their answers, buy products they supervise. if not, dont.
Each court system if different and they deal with those who ignore or evade jury duty differently. You might be lucky and they dont follow up, you might get unlucky and be issued a summons to appear in front of a judge to answer why you never showed up for jury duty. You might face a fine ranging from $50 to $1000 and even jail time. Before you make the stupid decision to ignore a jury duty summons, at least look into how the judicial system that called you deals with those who ignore them and make an informed decision.
Has anyone ever heard of a Rav anywhere issuing a psak that one is forbidden to sit on a jury?
I think the produce guys at KRM could beat the guys over at Pomegranate in a game of touch football any day of the week.
“Pomegranate is a total ripoff.”
Not sure how many issurim this statement violates, but need I remind everyone we are in the middle of sefira?
DY. Do you know that this particular person is not deserving of these accolades?
Go to the website of any hechsher that you consider reliable and tell us what, if any, of the criteria you listed are met by those sites.
Do you know if any assertions you made are fact? You cite no listing on kosherquest as an indication of its unreliablity, are you aware that kosherquest is not a complete list of all reliable hechsherim that are operating? It does not even list all reliable hechsherim in the state of Pennsylvania. Are you aware that numerous hechsherim cited as reliable by kosherquest also dont provide any “credentials” on their website that you state are necessary components of reliaility? Again, I have no idea who this hechsher is, who is behind it and if it meets the standards of kashrus I wish to keep in my home. I dont however see the chiyuv to unilaterally declare them unreliable simply because I know nothing about them. You can apply whatever standards you wish for yourself and your home, just remember to apply them uniformly to all certifying agencies. So, when will you be calling Rav Heineman Shlita or Rav Belsky Shlita for a copy of their “credentials”? What about Rabbi Eidlitz of Kosherquest, what are his credentials to list someone as reliable or unreliable? He has as much info regarding his reliability as the hechsher under discussion.
“(unhealthy fast food)”
Are you implying the other place is serving healthy food? 🙂
I don’t know the hechsher in question. Never heard of it and have no opinion or comment about its reliability one way or the other. However, the very idea that ones “credentials” are not listed on a website anywhere makes it unreliable is utterly ridiculous. There is a telephhone number and other contact info available to the public and one can certainly contact those responsible for this supervision. They are not hiding. As an aside, exactly what crfedentials would you like posted and how will that make you feel more comfortable about the supervision? You want a copy of his smicha? A list of rabbeim whose shiurim he attended? His practical field work? Using this standard, would you have enrolled at jts because a former head was a musmach of rav ruderman and a chassid of the belzer rerebbe in europe? If you don’t know anything, don’t say anything. A closed mouth never gggathers a foot.
If your wife has a legitimate reason that she can not serve jury duty, let her fill out the appropriate form with the clerk and he/she will grant an exemption for the time being (EG if she is primary care giver for a small child she will surely get a deferment for a number of years.) Simply to ignore the requests to appear is foolish.
Kol haposhet yad nosnim lo applies only on purim. With that said, instead of ignoring the guy for 2 mins, how about making it clear right away that you have nothing so he doesn’t stand there for 2 minns.
Walla Walla.
But with the pill pushers and buyers, the area is always congested. I try to avoid it.
You can get them under the bridge. The one guarded by the troll that is.
It could be the shas yidden know better than to go online on chol hamoed.
Don’t know the rav or his level of involvement in kashrus but I’m still waiting for his aplogy for casting so many frum people in a negative light.
Kaiser rolls? Tootsie rolls?
“Its raw and disgusting”
I agree, herring is horrible. I wouldnt feed it to a dog.
“Kreplach are eaten on Yom Kippur”
You really need to proofread before hitting send.
“why hasn’t anyone tried to convince me or anyone else I know to become Jewish.”
Jews believe that judaism is for jews. non jews do not subscribe to the christian doctrine that says “believe in my guy or be damned for all eternity”. the righteous will receive their just reward.
“it is really a food we shouldn’t be eating for hashkafa reasons”
So nuuu, what are you waiting for, go ask these Rabbonim to clarify what potential hashkafic reasons are at play to stay away from eating sushi. Borscht is not a yiddishe food either. In america it is associated with jews because jewish immigrants from russia brought it over with them and the carnegie deli made it popular. So, does that mean in america there are no hashkafic reasons to stay away from borscht but in say, spain it would be problematic? We need clarification from these anonymous rabbonim.
“I asked one of the people who gave the shiur and he shrugged his shoulders and said “its not a yiddishe maichal”
This is what you wrote in the OP. Now, please go back and ask said anonymous Rabbonim what they mean by “not a yiddishe maichel”. Do they mean these are foods that didnt originate with yidden (in which case, pizza, hot dogs, tuna fish and cream cheese would fall into the same category, so why pick on sushi) or do they mean these are foods not associated with yidden (which is probably true of (80% of all items found in a heimishe supermarket again, why pick on sushi) or do they mean this is food yidden should not eat, in which case, we are asking you to ask said anonymous rabbonim why they believe this is the case. Of course there is the possibility that none of my suggested interpretations are correct, in which case, please ask them to clarify what they mean.
Dear OP. If your assertion is true, and it really bothers you, contact the Rabbonim who gave said shiurim and ask them about it. Please report back their reply.
the way I see it. if someone is foolish enough to pay for it, I might as well be the one smart enough to charge for it.