Chochom-ibber

Im taller than my husband. But he knows when he stands on his ego he is much taller then me.

@zahavasdad

Once again you have thrown a topic off track.

This has nothing to do with a BT jumping in too fast, overwhelming ones-self with chumras and “trying to fit in”.

THIS is a person striving to grow one step at a time towards a hight goal of fulfilling our life here on earth.

No need to bring in maises of some random exception where sustaining from entertainment-media led to a negative outcome.

NO RELEVANCE TO THIS TOPIC AT ALL.

Whats wrong with cooking and cleaning and caring for the kids? Just make sure that supper is ready when your husband walks through that door!!

Its cruel NOT to decorate certain people.

Find stories of Gedolim that will impress upon him the severity of the issue at hand. Inadvertently and subconsciously have him realise that we are of the higher “club” with proper moral standards together with these Gedolim.

On SEED I was put in the common awkward situation of having a woman’s hand outstretched to welcome me with a normal social handshake. Politely and cautiously I told her that the only woman’s hand I shake is my wife’s. A bit taken aback she asked why. I bluntly told her that many poor-taste relationships have started by a public casual handshake, with a little extra squeeze or smile or wink that led to other future contact. An undeniable truth in today’s society. She immediately turned to her husband and said that is the most beautiful thing I’ve heard, why don’t you do that too?

Obviously each situation must be judged with saichel. Sometimes one must turn to the maikilim in such matters. However the point here is that as far fetch and extreme as shomer negia might sound NO ONE will argue that that is how immoral relationships begin.

I had one of those ridiculous washer/dryer combos. I don’t remember which company produced it but I do know that it took from Channuka to Purim to one one load.

@sem613

“The American part and the Hesder part seem pretty separate hashkaficly from what I hear.”

The Hesder section obviously has their hashkofos but the Chutznik part has absolutely no hashkafa at all. The hashkafa is – you can listen to the Hesder rant and choose if you want to hear, basically you’re on your own, if you call that a hashkafa.

Unfortunately it is a necessity these day.

Have a separate garbage bag for when you come. Leave his to build up and continue disposing of yours. After a couple days of pile up, either:

A) He’ll get the msg that you are not his garbage collector and you do not agree to be stepped on. (if he is purposely doing this)

B) The manager will confront you and you will respectfully let him know that you do remove your garbage and are too annoyed with the lack of cleanliness due to Dan.

Or you can just take the high road though not recommendable if it will cause you a frustration build up.

I’d like to be called Sir, Lord or The Honourable.

The more they’re megiaer the more people they can influence about their (non)religious beliefs. They obviously don’t have a chance with us so 2nd best; bring in a new crop. They’ll have more people following their shittas, turning to their Rabbis thereby validating themselves. It helps them sleep at night.

Don’t give presents to be like the the goyim. Give presents so the children will anticipate the beautiful holiday of Channuka. And yes, the mekor is only for actual money.

Post a new one as a disengagement. See what they do with that. I heard one of the simchah sites charges $150 to remove an announcement or picture. Real chutzpa and so wrong on many levels. I had a friend who got posted as engaged after the 4th date. They did end up married but dated 9 times before proposing. You have any idea what kind of pressure that can put on the boy & girl??

Anyways, much hatzlocha.

No need for worries. Moshiach will be here and all will be accepted to BJJ. a nes will occur and BJJ will be able to accommodate all of Klal Yisroel.

@Gamanit

Let them give as much as they want from a donation!! Not from tuition by raising it on everybody! I hope your not taking a tax deduction on your children’s tuition, cause its the cost of education not a chesed.

@gavra_at_work

I am saying that the Yeshivos (even non-communal) should take responsibility IF THEY accept the parents who don’t pay. That responsibility must be filled via fund raising not by transferring the costs to other parents struggling (or even not struggling) to put together the full tuition. I think we’re playing on the same team in that regard.

However regarding your exaggerated Maserati scenario, I stand strong, a person should not sell a present. Definitely not without consulting the presentee.

@Ender

There is no place outside NY.

@zahavasdad

Good argument. You are %100 right.

I’m sure though that it is just a scare and PR hoax so The Jewish Community at large will cough up more money. The issue will not be solved. They will get back on their feet with the help of our generous hearts, for a while they might even get a little more strict whilst collecting tuition, they will eventually fallback into the same non-sufficient situation they were in years ago.

Yes, umdana. Its been a while. My apologies.

I’m not either sure why the Torah doubles it in other places but not here. I do know that in regards to the sugia of tnai kofel there are exceptions when an umdina is present. I am merely sugesting a route which might lead you to an answer.

Another path to take would be perhaps that the Torah is referring to ??????? ?????????? ??????? as a metzios outcome. Not a scharr.

Bichkosai is clearly a blessing not a direct outcome.

The m’ever hayardain is clearly a promise not a direct outcome.

Any of the cases the gemara brings in regard to the halocha of having tnai kaful between one person and another; chovos, shtaros not direct metzios obviously.

I haven’t looked around and I would not be able to say this on my own but maybe long life is in metzios attributed to kibud av v’em. Respecting ones parents, honouring them, lowering your ego to them can definitely lead to great menuchas hanefesh. Getting a bit too machshavadik now but if there is something there then Rashi is merely stating that the reverse effect is true as well not that it is a promise that the Torah needs to double. Maybe.

A child most definitely should NOT be accepted to a Yeshiva if his/her parents do not pay tuition!!

This holds true only if…

…the Yeshiva is not a community Yeshiva. Out-of-Town Yeshivos and Yeshivos or seminaries in EY have no obligation to accept students that will add an extra financial burden on the school thereby requiring the comunity to extend extra donations on behalf of that student.

…the parents do not prioritize within their financial capabilities the importance of taking responsibility (paying) for their children’s education. As someone who has served on tuition committees I can recall countless stories of parents who drove luxury cars, took 5 star vacations, excessive home renovations etc. and then had the chutzpa to file for a tuition break. NO BOOSHA. This applies to a community school as well.

Schools on the other hand aught to have the courtesy of dividing their total budget by the amount of students they have. To cover those who simply cannot pay full tuition, the gap should be fund-raised rather than included in the actual costs of fulfilling ones obligation of educating THEIR child.

Everyone wants a Learning Type Boy. Hopefully. The world cannot turn without them. Every boy should be as successful as he potentially can while in the confined walls of his Yeshiva or office. His goals should be aimed towards the great minds in Torah. It is the only way.

By acquiring (Torah’s vocabulary) a wife one must realize the burden of earning a parnosa. Whether one fills those responsibilities through Torah Umnoso, 7 yrs in medical school or even soliciting he must realize that it is his achrai’is.

In most cases a new couple is able to financially survive the 1st few yrs without a formal breadwinner. B”H to the current respectable generation that financially aids Torah. Why a person would run run run to make more more more money is fuelled by lack of success in the Yeshiva World. Take it slow, learn as much as you can while you can. There is no reason to rush into building your goyishe mindset of a family.

@oomis in all seriousness:

There was no longer any potential tachlis. It takes two for a relationship to form and he clearly did not see a future together. The boy found the most proper indiscreet manner to courteously end their association. She aught to respect his decision and appreciate his way of communicating it. The girl should not expect a romantic, goyish ‘breakup’. This is the Yeshiva World NOT Hollywood.

uh hem

From a non-affiliated point of view Id say: Think of it as an exclusive close knit family/club. We have gone through tons, we have sacrificed for each other. For thousands of years our ancestors sacrificed for us, and we continue in their ways. As communities go you wont find a more helping one. Agudah Achas, Ahavas Yisroel. Without getting into The Chosen People shmooze.