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Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 273 total)
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  • in reply to: Shidduchim for singles with mental health issues #1665406

    hudi
    Participant

    People with mental health issues or a history of trauma, even mild, should be in therapy and stable before embarking in shidduchim. Unchecked mental health issues in marriage, even if only one partner has issues, is a recipe for disaster. Premarital counseling is also a mist.

    in reply to: Would you date someone on anxiety meds? #1193286

    hudi
    Participant

    I’m a girl and this is a guy that a shadchan thought of for me. She has known this guy for a while but he recently revealed to her that he takes medication for anxiety.

    I’m worried about the same things that people are mentioning. Who is he off his meds?

    in reply to: DO WE REALLY HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE TO LIVE IN CHUTZ LA'ARETZ? #1112944

    hudi
    Participant

    We do have a good reason. And that reason is that Mashiach is not here yet. When Mashiach comes and is confirmed as Mashiach I will go to Eretz Yisrael.

    in reply to: What's the deal with Donald Trump? #1090386

    hudi
    Participant

    I think Trump is a joke. He’s not going to win. People don’t relate to him. He is too used to getting his own way.

    in reply to: if you found out youre a goy… #1010398

    hudi
    Participant

    Go to har habayis

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183362

    hudi
    Participant

    Is he at least opening up some more and starting to heal?

    in reply to: Why are people against socialism? #998801

    hudi
    Participant

    Socialism is good when you have a society filled with hardworking able bodied people.

    Socialism is not good when you have a society filled with hardworking and lazy people.

    in reply to: Apple Juice Bottles #999230

    hudi
    Participant

    Fructose in the sugar found in fruit and also high fructose corn syrup.

    I don’t think the sugar content in apple juice is high enough to make the body diurese.

    If I give babies and small children fruit juice, I dilute with water. Babies need milk or formula, not water, anyhow. Their stomachs shouldn’t be filled with water so they will want to eat later.

    in reply to: Funny quotes #1001178

    hudi
    Participant

    Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. – Mark Twain

    Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    On the other hand, you have different fingers.

    Despite the cost of living, it remains very popular.

    I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

    I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

    Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don’t have film.

    in reply to: Eucalyptus #1015237

    hudi
    Participant

    Why is this in the inspiration/mussar section?

    in reply to: THE BROKEN TELEPHONE GAME!!! #1227881

    hudi
    Participant

    hat

    baseball

    football

    ravens

    edgar allen poe

    pole

    light post

    dark

    night

    in reply to: CR Trivia #998905

    hudi
    Participant

    The one I’m just about to make….lol

    in reply to: When you have a bunch of keys that look the same #1010174

    hudi
    Participant

    Key covers! Found at home depot and similar stores. These work for house keys, not sure about car keys.

    in reply to: Lashon Hora: Our hardest tikkun? #999192

    hudi
    Participant

    TROLL me thinks…..

    in reply to: Classic Yediah/Bechirah Question #995437

    hudi
    Participant

    DaasYochid – The grandmaster is not choosing the moves of the opponent (us). He is anticipating moves and watching the mind of the opponent as he thinks of possible moves and makes those moves. Although the grandmaster (who is not your regular chess player, as you can see by now) has the power to cause the opponent to move in a certain way and either win or lose the game, he “steps back” so to speak and allows the opponent to make his own moves. Hashem has clear knowledge of our present and future choices. He can see and indeed allows into being the cascade of events that result from our single action/choice. Hashem is beyond time. Past, present, and future are one to Him. Hashem does not generally prevent us from moving in a certain direction, although He certainly can. The world is set up with cause and effect and is a world of tevah. Built into the structure of the universe are results for actions. Gravity is a clear example. Drop the apple and it falls. I think this can be applied on a microcosmic level, even to the level of the subtleties of human interaction. The famous question is..Can Hashem create a stone that is too heavy for Him to lift. The answer is OF COURSE, but it is not tevah, so it will not happen.

    in reply to: Classic Yediah/Bechirah Question #995434

    hudi
    Participant

    I think the chess analogy can be improved upon. Think about a grandmaster who can anticipate moves AND also happens to know your intentions as you are thinking them AND knows (well actually creates)the future. Pretty much like a brain inside your brain.

    in reply to: Classic Yediah/Bechirah Question #995374

    hudi
    Participant

    We are making our choices, and although Hashem knows what choice we are ultimately going to make, He does not usually interfere. Hashem “allows” us to go on the path we choose. It says in Mishlei (3:43)”If to the cynics (leitzim) he will act cynically, but to the humble He will grant favor.” In Maseches Shabbos (104a) it’s explained that a person who associates with the cynics is not helped or prevented from carrying out his actions. However, a person who is drawn to humbleness will receive assistance from Hashem “He will grant favor.” (Rashi)

    We are taught that harsh gezeiros can be overturned by Teshuva, Tefilah, and Gemilas Chasadim. A person’s free choice does not always extend into the collective tzibur of people. In some cases, Hashem judges us as a nation as a whole and I believe power of personal free choice can be lessened from collective merit or the opposite. Ultimately, the ways of Hashem are hidden. We as people are not judges of what is good or “bad.” We know what we are told in our holy Torah.

    There are many different paths to the future. Hashem knows where we will end up and which path we will take. We don’t know where we will end up. We may deviate from the correct path for us and end up with a different future. Does this make sense?

    in reply to: What if I'm really a retard #1198807

    hudi
    Participant

    You’re probably just a very unique individual.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183351

    hudi
    Participant

    Glad to hear he is settling down a little and gaining some stability. It can only get better from here.

    in reply to: Yaakov and Esav were really triplets! #988169

    hudi
    Participant

    Haleivi – interesting, because we know that Dovid and Eisav were both “Adom – red”

    in reply to: Bad mood. #1032260

    hudi
    Participant

    What’s red and bad for your teeth?

    A brick 🙂

    in reply to: Can cancer be cured with organic vegan whole food diet? #978642

    hudi
    Participant

    Nurse here. No, if only it were so simple! Cancer cells are abnormal cells that do not self destruct like “normal” abnormally functioning cells. They continuously replicate and replace normal cells. Eventually, the organ cannot function properly and support itself and organ failure occurs. Some cancer cells secrete hormones that are normally secreted by other parts of the body,which wrecks havoc as you can imagine. Diet has a big impact on health, but cannot give cancer cells telomeres or the ability to apoptose.

    in reply to: Mashiach > 6000 #1011426

    hudi
    Participant

    We are not supposed to calculate the end. Imagine what would happen if someone said “It is the 6000th year; Mashiach is coming this year” and he doesn’t come? We could have another chet haegel cv”s.

    in reply to: Girls, answer honestly #958082

    hudi
    Participant

    I don’t wear makeup everyday. When I do, I apply very naturally. Moisturizer, Coverup, bronzer/blush, lip balm (chapstick), mascara, brownish pink eye shadow, and sometimes powder. I enhance, not alter.

    in reply to: What if you weren't Jewish? #974438

    hudi
    Participant

    PBA – You had me laughing there! LOL

    I would convert. It would be wonderful! Fresh clean slate…

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1183168

    hudi
    Participant

    This is a good sign. It seems he has reached rock bottom and has no choice but to turn to you and your husband. Hopefully Hashem will follow. Give him a big hug and cry with him. This is not your fault. Even if you did recognize the signs, he would possibly have rejected your attempts to reach him. He had to reach the bottom before he allowed himself to come to you. Hatzlacha raba and I hope you find the proper shaliach. We are all thinking of you.

    in reply to: Minhag of Women Shaving Head #1191911

    hudi
    Participant

    “I was told that the reason was originally instigated to protect the woman and only afterward did they come up with all the reasons stated above. According to what I was told, it was started as a result of the pogroms. In a pogrom, the gentiles would try raping the women but when they would remove a woman’s turban and discover her head was shaven, they would sometimes be turned off.”

    Interjection – I heard a similar idea but from the time period of the Greeks around the time Chanukah took place when engaged women had to be defiled by the Greek general the night before their wedding. I was told they shaved their heads to look unattractive.

    in reply to: Condolences To A Non Jewish Professor? #925922

    hudi
    Participant

    Email back: “I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you will find comfort soon.” Zehu.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182874

    hudi
    Participant

    Daniela – those ideas are very nice, but they are not things children jump to do and generally do not fall into the category children call “fun.” The world has changed.

    in reply to: The Most OVERrated Things in Life #923298

    hudi
    Participant

    justwantagooodoy – try not sleeping for a week and let me know what you think.

    in reply to: What's wrong with the draft? #924110

    hudi
    Participant

    The gedolim have a vision about the situation that we may not.

    Personally, I think many of the chareidim in Israel are not strong enough to withstand the temptations of life outside of the yeshiva. Much like the haskalah movement in Europe pre WWII.

    in reply to: Girls in Shidduchim wearing sweatshirts ? #922972

    hudi
    Participant

    WIY, you did not answer my question directly, but I will take it as a yes.

    in reply to: Girls in Shidduchim wearing sweatshirts ? #922971

    hudi
    Participant

    Morah Rach – The C’V was sarcastic. I do not look down at people who wear sweatshirts. I think there are more important things to focus on in a person.

    Saysme – you are correct!

    in reply to: Girls in Shidduchim wearing sweatshirts ? #922963

    hudi
    Participant

    WIY: Would you call off a shidduch if you found out through intense interrogation techniques that girl wears sweatshirts out of the house C”V?

    However, I do agree that there is a certain level of chashivus a kollel wife should have and therefore not wearing sweatshirts.

    in reply to: The Most OVERrated Things in Life #923282

    hudi
    Participant

    And vaccinations SHOULD NOT be on the list. They are lifesaving and prevent thousands of deaths each year.

    in reply to: The Most OVERrated Things in Life #923281

    hudi
    Participant

    Football.

    Space travel.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182753

    hudi
    Participant

    I’m sorry to hear. It must be torture for you.

    We really do not know, nor can we fully understand the workings of Hashem’s plan for us and the rest of world.

    in reply to: Dating/marriage question, Am I realistic…? #917480

    hudi
    Participant

    Popa: I like your serious posts 😉

    WIY: I think it’s a nice thing to look for, but not completely realistic. Going to a shiur once a week is more realistic, but can’t expect this after marriage. I don’t know any girls who consistently read hashkafa books (as regularly as guys learn). I know girls (myself included) who read such books and try to live by them, but it’s more of a spontaneous read than disciplined and regular study.

    in reply to: Shiduch List #915050

    hudi
    Participant

    The basics would be:

    Personality – introverted vs extroverted

    Hashkafa/frumkeit – tznius, TV/movies, secular music, internet etc

    Family’s hashkafa/background

    School/work/stay at home mother

    Age

    Intelligence

    Height

    Specific middos you value

    What you do not want

    Eretz yisroel (if you want to live there)

    Looks

    OOT or not

    Ashkenaz/Sefardi/Chassidish/Litvish

    BT/MO/FFB

    What you will not compromise on

    This is just a list. Be flexible and willing to compromise 🙂

    in reply to: Nasty virus going around #914297

    hudi
    Participant

    PROLONGED FEVER as high as 103 is dangerous for adults and children. For your child under 4 y.o. even more so. A fever above 102 for an infant is critical.

    in reply to: Scrub gemach??? #913680

    hudi
    Participant

    I recently discovered Uniformadvantage.com. It has long, flared scrub skirts without slits!

    in reply to: Shadchanim #918224

    hudi
    Participant

    What’s SYAS?

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182626

    hudi
    Participant

    W0W – if you haven’t already explained to your son, please explain that this man was wrong to assault him. Explain what the man should have done instead.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182598

    hudi
    Participant

    Baruch Hashem! So happy to hear!

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182575

    hudi
    Participant

    Good to hear! Much hatzlacha! We are with you and your family and the rest of our brother in EY under rocket attack.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182553

    hudi
    Participant

    I think WOW and others should ignore those who are attacking WOW. WOW, there is no reason for you to defend yourself. You are doing everything possible that you can. You are in contact with da’as torah and therapists. You are reaching out for help.You are doing nothing wrong. There should be no issue whatever with WOW’s desire to clarify her feelings and seek guidance.

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182546

    hudi
    Participant

    It was a general statement.

    in reply to: Who Will WinROMNEY or OBAMA? #991891

    hudi
    Participant

    I’m predicting OBAMA, but don’t change your vote BC of this.

    in reply to: Why do you think the Hurricane Sandy came? #906883

    hudi
    Participant

    Whiteberry and Popa- LOL LOL

    in reply to: Going off the Derech #1182543

    hudi
    Participant

    A general statement to people following this thread:

    Please do not be quick to judge write or wrong, especially if you have not experienced a similar situation in your own family. This holds even if you have experienced a similar situation, because every situation is unique.

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 273 total)


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