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Drakkar for Men. Polo Sport, not bad either.
PBA. I think your comments are made in light of preconcieved notions and biases. My comments are especially true for girls dating 2-3 years whose pie in the sky dreams and hashkafos foisted upon them by seminaries have worn off.
Many comments in the CR seem to originate from ETs.
They want to marry girls who are shomrei torah umitzvos.
If 18 years old guys starting dating we would have a divorce crisis.
The reason the takana ended after 2000 years, is because it was a takana for 2000 years (so they say).
Rabbeinu Gershom was certainly not influenced by western society.
couple of years ago I gave someone a ride to the mountains. He kept asking me which country I go to. After a dozen times I finally realized what he meant after he told me what country he was headed to 🙂
Which country? 🙂
Ditto. If your not mature enough to deal with a shadchan, your not mature enough to deal with a spouse.
Actually mewho your not that far off, but instead of goats the currency is years of support. And, its not soon, that’s todays reality.
I still miss Fruzen Gladje. Only place I ever found it was at the IGA in Stroudsburg, Pa about 20 years ago.
“sometime I just want to answer that I dont know anymore what I want. “
I once answered this question to a shadchas as “a pulse”.
Perhaps their mother is to picky and shoots down every suggestion before you finish speaking. Bypass mothers and go straight to the guy/gal themselves. If you cant approach someone about a shidduch when they are 28, they are probably not ready for marriage. If their mother insists, well, then there is a large part of the problem.
“the guys mothers generallly speaking (outside of Roshei Yeshiva families) want”
This statement is a major contributing factor to all problems. Who cares what the mothers want, it is what the guys want that matters (or should). Bypass the mothers and you will see many more shidduchim. My personal policy when redting a shidduch is speak to the guy/gal directly and I try to avoid the mothers at all times. They are the single greatest hinderance to any shidduch.
A young woman was niftar in toronto a year (or two? – I’m not from toronto but recently heard it from someone who lives there) ago. The entire community davened, learned and did all sorts of mitzvos in her zchus so she should have a refua. She was niftar. A rav gave the people chizuk by telling them all the tefillos and zechusim are not for naught, they are accrued in shamayim and at the appropriate time (tbd by shamayim) they will be “put to use”. You never lose by doing a mitzvah, saying a tefilla or perek tehillim.
Verizon. BB Curve. my phone doesn’t have a name, but if pressed, I’d go with Herschel.
DY. I saw the tosfos in sota. Can you please clarify how you understand it?
“??? ???’, ??? ??? ??? ?? ?????? ???”
And each one of those males was associated with a bas ploni. Are you learning tosfos that the bas ploni half of the statement was gratuitious? The bas kol didnt really mean it?
Where is this tosfos? The quote also seems to be quoting someone else, who is learning tosfos like that?
DY. I’m not the ribbono shel olam and I’m not a member of his committee. I don’t know the cheshbonos in shamayim and why things do or don’t happen. I believe that the ribbono she’ll olam created a shidduch for everyone. If you believe otherwise, that’s your perogative.
Why do you assume there was no bas kol for a child that died r’l? If a 20 something jumps off a bridge and dies, do you assume there was no bas kol too? My job is to help someone who wants to get married do so, not wring my hands in despair because someone is 37 years old.
As to what tosfos may or may not say, I have no idea. Why don’t you tell me.
DY. I think it is you who miss the point. Bas ploni, liploni. Nobody was passed over. Everyone born, has a shidduch. The nisayon is finding it, not creating it. Baalboose is spot on that societal stupidity has made it that much more difficult.
When I was there it was a full fledged branch with guys regularly doing the shuttle between rochester and then forest hills.
To avoid confusion, what if we instead identified as talmidim of RSA.
I redt a 26 year old female to a 24 year old male. She responded “I’m not a cradle snatcher”.its not as simple as setting up “close in age shidduchim” to alleviate the “crisis”. The underlying social expectations as it relates to shidduchim needs a major overhaul. The idea that families must go into hock in order to secure shidduchim for their children is absurd. The notion that everyone must “sit and learn” and demands a shidduch that allows him to do so is quite frankly retarded. The idea that proper hishtadlus for parnassah is signing up for government programs (a neighbor of mine went out with a fellow last night who expressed this plan for hishtadlus) is frightening. Shidduch crisis? Social expectations have reached ridiculous proportions.
Rochester. Talmid of Rabbi D.
Whether you are making shidduchim for money, for the mitzvah or because you like people hounding you at all hours of the day, your job is hindered by the fact that many who you work with have no clue what they are looking for. They use nice adjectives like “baalas middos, masmid, tzanua, has a personality”, but have no idea what they really mean. They are following the herd mentality of going to hich school a, seminary b, shadchan c, to look for a shidduch from among the bachurim in yeshiva d.
Take the girls up to YU. Lots of available single males, all shomrei torah umitzvos. The problem is that they have excluded such available single males from their pool of possible shidduchim. I don’t know why. But it is sad.
“Chitsonis are meorrer the pnimios”. That is one school of thought, but not the only one.
Have the principal of your old school speak to the principal of the new school. Perhaps (I am not inside the head of the principal), because he/she doesnt really know you, he doesnt realize or understand how important it is to you. Perhaps your old principal or teachers who know you can help him understand.
“However, i am now going to high school”
I’m not sure if this means that you just finished elementary school, but if it does, I’m sure you discussed it with the school principal and your teachers (you didnt just skip class, did you?). Why cant you do the same thing with the high school teachers/principal?
since everyone seems to be infatuated with “joseph”, perhaps it is important to know what HIS favorite frozen pizza is, or if it is even becoming for a yorei shomayim to eat frozen pizza.
“bp everyone does”
Thats highly debatable. Nevertheless, I dont want this to digress to a discussion on the Eruv.
It is entirely possible that the reason is because the homes on the blocks mentioned by the OP are rather large and spacious inside with room for the various family members to do their own thing and have their own space. the homes in BP are not all that spacious and especially in warmer weather the last place you want to be is inside on top of everyone else.
He only owns one hat?
Sorry for talking to you the way I would talk to my own 15 year old 🙂
Are you expected to be on time? Are you being paid to be on time?
F has an eruv.
Why cant he leave his hat in shul?
He could always walk to shul. He can wear his hat and still get excercise.
Why dont you want to be joseph?
Catholics are especially fond of joseph. They even have a saying WWJD (what would joseph do) when confronted with a dillema.
Perhaps it is because the men are in the beis medrash not the sushi bars?
Dont think of a simcha as a fundraiser. It isn’t. You are not obligated to cover the cost of having you at the simcha and you are certainly not obligated to pay for your meal with a gift. Give what you believe is appropriate and that you can afford.
I subscribe to and enjoy reading AMI magazine. With that said, I am still trying to understand the “no photos of women” policy employed by these papers. While this is certainly no proof to anything, I recently purchased the new expanded edition of R’ Shimon Finklemans biography of R’ Moshe Z’l. The book contains numerous photos of his Rebbetzin, family portraits that include photos of his daughters in law and granddaughters and other women who are mentioned in the book. The biography of R’ Pam Z’l and numerous other books published by Artscroll also contain photos of women. They clearly do not believe it is forbidden and do not have an editorial policy against it. So, when did this become editorial policy of the Yated, Hamodia, Mishpacha etc… and why? Some of the advertisements contained in these magazines and newspapers are hashkafically more problematic than a partially obscured head shot of Hillary Clinton (mishpacha magazine recently addressed one such ad).
If anyone can pull it off it is Reb Michael Rotchild, founder of the CCHF.
wash it off.
“When is it permissible to discuss others’ problem (if ever)?”
Recently I was asked to help collect funds for a neighborhood family, to help them make a chassuna. My Rav told me that I was forbidden to tell people who I was collecting for (they would be embarrassed), and the only situation where it was permitted, was if it would result in the person giving more if they knew who they were giving for (and even then, there were conditions – those situations I had the Rav make the call!).
I would say it is the rare circumstance where one is permitted to discuss others’ problems.
If you feel so strongly that you were wronged, take them to beis din. Otherwise, forget about it.
Joseph. Of course.
Spam is spam. No need to be nice to a spammer.
I always check the car before I walk away. It is a force of habit.
I can’t seem to win anything at a chineese auction, but I have the good mazel of winning the ghana national lottery twice a month.
“Wrong, taking Gov. programs isn’t Tzedaka, it’s Parnossa.”
To you, not to the government.
It is a temporary form of assistance until one is able to be self supporting. That is how the government looks at it, even if you do not.
Does halacha equate the taking of tzedaka with earning parnassa? Does halacha require a gabbai tzedaka to give money to someone who comes to collect his daily “paycheck”? (I don’t know the answer)
I’m not trying to bait you. I am trying to understand just how far you are willing to go.
You took the statement of chazal that one is permitted to “lie” (i dont believe chazal said that, they did not say sheker is permitted, they said one may be mishane) for the sake of shalom and extended it to, one may lie for the sake of parnassah. Then, you stated that dina dimalchusa does not apply to the US government in general and benefits programs in particular, and that one may lie to gain access to programs one would otherwise not qualify for. Somehow you equate tzedaka and government programs with parnassah. Since you have no issues making these leaps, I just wanted to see how far you are willing to leap.
I’m not your Rav and will not tell you what to do. All I can say is Shomer Pisayim Hashem, be careful and dont get caught. I’m not coming to visit you.
DY. I’m not sure if you are agreeing, disagreeing or strengthening what I wrote.
I always thought that when chazal tell us that one need not be 100% truthful to maintain shalom, it was to maintain shalom between others. For example, in order to maintain shalom between avram and sara, the ribbono shel olam changed saras statement when speaking to avram. Or, as chazal tell us, Aaron Hakohen would go to each party and tell them the other party is sorry and wants to make up, again, for the sake of shalom between people. Simply lying to my wife where I’ve been so that I can weasel out of some housework and maintain shalom with my wife, is lying, not maintaining shalom. Then again, thats what I thought, but I really have no firm basis or proof for it.
I am asking you just how far you are willing to extend your chiddush/kula, not a psak.
And if people do in fact lie in the scenarios mentioned, is that another tzad hetter that we can attach to your chiddush so that we can lie with no reservations?