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r-b,
Yes, I was just pointing out the perspective of the older sibling.
Of course, it’s not a simple matter, and each case must be evaluated separately.
I know a family in which the older sister met a young man but felt he wasn’t for her, so she suggested him for her sister. They are now married, but the older sister is still single several tears later.
I know of a different story in which the younger brother married before his older sister, who refused to speak to him until the day she died (a spinster).
Another story I’m familiar with involved two brothers. The younger one was told that he does not have to wait, but he chose to, regardless. The older one finally got engaged, and two months later, the younger one found his bashert.
I could go on, but my point is that it’s a complex issue, and one never knows how much pain could be caused to either party/
Hmmm where have I seen that before…
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/proper-pronunciation-of-words-in-prayers#post-257773
Everyone should have a “dating coach”
Thanks for the advice, but I don’t think my wife would be too thrilled. 😉
The term OTD is too strong, but yes, this is a big problem. The older singles often (if not always) do need some form of guidance. I don’t know why you single out the men, though, there are plenty of single women with the same issue.
The gemara in Sanhedrin uses the actions of the Avot to derive laws for Noachides, not Jews.
The gemara in Kiddushin uses the actions of Avraham Avinu to derive laws of nasi shemachal al k’vodo, which is for Jews.
The sources in rishonim and acharonim for assuming that the avos kept the mitzvos are numerous.
Mazel tov! I guess you did read the “slow down you move too fast…..” thread.
?
Why is it fair for an older sister to suffer the tremendous humiliation of seeing her younger sister get married first?
Tell her mazel tov from all of the folks in the CR!
Daas Yochid (who does not consume any babies)
No, because I’m not smart enough to.
The average number of unmoderated posts still up when YW-42’s posts appear in the CR. ?
Would you remove masechte Yevamot from the beit midrash? From your personal shelves?
I haven’t read the article either, but I think your analogy is poor. This article was printed (apparently) in a publication with features for children.
Yes, that you’ll probably have even more white in your 40’s.
There are different levels of Cheresh.
That’s true.
If someone can consent or object to a get, they probably arent a true cheresh.
He could still be a cheresh and not be able to give a get to someone he’s married to mid’oraisa, such as a case of yibum.
They may remain married even if he is married to someone else? You wrote that he paskened that cherem d’Rabeinu Gershom does not apply in such a case.
From the little I saw, it seems so. This obviously would not be practical in a country which prohibits polygamy.
So in a case where an eino m’daber v’aino shomeia is the only brother, the almana remains an agunah for the rest of her life?
I believe so (obviously, you’re assuming that the brother outlives her).
As far as I know, a true cheresh cannot give a Get either.
True, if he is an eino m’daber v’aino shomeia. The cheresh for whom only yibum (followed by a get) is an option (but not chalitzah) is a m’daber v’aino shomeia (or vice versa, an eeleim)
One of the cases involved a young widow whose yavam was missing his right foot, preventing her from performing chalitza.
Pischei Teshuvah (165 – 3) brings several sources which deal with such a case.
Most hold to do yibum. Beis Meir ads that cherem d’Rabeinu Gershom does not apply in such a case. The cherem not to give a get without her consent also does not apply, says Bais Meir, because he only married her for the mitzvah. It is implied that they may remain married if they wish.
My wife is my best friend. Last time I checked, I was male and she was female.
I guess we’re just sinners. 🙂
Well, apparently, it is only assur for males and females to be friends with each other, but one on one should be okay (at least if you’re married). ?
this publication is free to print whatever they want 1st amendment
And anyone outraged is free to call the publisher and complain.
Mazel Tov, Toi!
The people who helped me write it.
The Rav investigated the matter and ruled that due to the circumstances (i.e. the alternative being that she remain an agunah), yibum could be performed with the proviso that the couple divorce immediately afterward.
It’s the same reasoning as with a cheresh.
(I believe the subsequent Brisker Rov’s are also known as The Rov.)
Not AFAIK; “The Rov” is reserved for R’ Velvel.
As far as use of the term “The Rav” for Rabbi J.B. Soloveitchik of America, the “A” instead of the “O” is a giveaway.
Pac / Man,
Thank you!
*You’re
Your welcome!
Okay so the guy has actually gorgeus hair
Then he’ll probably take off his hat in the taxi so it shouldn’t get messed up.
Mod 80 & Yossi Z.,
AYC was referring to Shavuos.
amongst Sefardim, yibum is still an option today?
Not as far as I know.
Daas yochid:he actually doesn’t drive
Well, then, according to one poster, it’s hopeless anyway.
I know a guy who didn’t take off his hat until the vort. He was bald.
Do ashkenazi poskim consider it chal at all?
It’s chal, just not allowed.
It depends what type of car he’s driving.
So a cheresh *must* do yibum today (since he cannot do chalitza)?
What if the cheresh is married (and Ashkenaz thus under Cherem D’Rabbeinu Gershom)?
I would venture a guess that the cherem was not instituted for such a case. Even if he’s not married, he immediately gives a get.
Why not?
Because he’ll have the wrong kavana.
If I would tell you, it wouldn’t be a secret.
do we force him to perform chalitza?
If at all possible. Yibum is not done nowadays (except if the yovom is a cheresh).
What if the brother isn’t religious and refuses to do it, where does that leave the widow?
An agunah, lo aleinu. Obviously, everything possible is done to convince him to do it.
KIsh Echad,
You can still fix a spelling error as long as it still says “edit” after your post.
Crisis?
It got you to look at the thread! 😉
My comment was a rhetorical, rather than literal, response to apushtayid. If you notice it was reversed verbatim.
OK, so for thick headed people like me, please explain what point you were trying to get across.
Its a good thing tisha bav doesnt fall out on shavuos then.
?
DY–I had a dream last night that I woke up in the morning and logged on to the CR and discovered that you had Joseph written under your screen name. I was really disappointed because I had always enjoyed your posts and it was a big letdown to find out that you were Joseph all along.
What a nightmare (for me!)
It’s a shame, you finally get some sleep, and this happens!
Besides, I wasn’t Joseph all along, it just started happening slowly…
Is it ever permissible NOT to learn?
Tisha B’av, (except for inyanei churban & aveilus), Nittel, (according to soeme), when you’re asleep.
Why, did they only allow “slightly older” girls to serve refreshments?
_____________________________________________
I didn’t say “slightly older girls” I said “unmarried girls.”
Cantoresq, I was addressing Charlie’s assertion that the shidduch crises would be avoided if your minhag was followed today.
1)because when one gives up smoking, food tastes MUCH better
2)a gym membership, bec they will start gaining weight.
So it seems that for someone with a weight problem, it would be a good idea to start smoking, right?
Taken out of context.
In what way? Please explain.
I get great deals like every other day and u really save $$$$$
How do any of us save money if you’re the one getting the great deals?
SJS,
The point that I am making, as are others, is that if there is some basis medically for circumcision, it is clear that those who wish to ban it have non-medical reasons. Otherwise let them recommend against it, but why take away everyone’s choice?
To think that these people are motivated by altruistic motives is to bury your head in the sand.
Not every distraction is necessarily a bad thing; especially if it leads to successful matches.
There’s a proper time for everything.
And they never heard of a shidduch crisis.
Why, did they only allow “slightly older” girls to serve refreshments?
DY. So, have a seudas mitzva. at home.
No room for the 10 piece band. 😉
BS’D,
At least they will shukkel better!
No doubt!
apushatayid,
If someone won’t be nichshal, and is in a matzav of “leka darka achrina”, they’re good to go.