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The Ramban in his introduction to Iyov tell us that one moment in Gehinom is more painful than all the tzoros of Iyov (quoted by the Chafetz Chaim in one of his seforim).
R’ Levy Yitzchak of berditzev is purported to have said that he’s not afraid of Gehinom because if if it’s rotzon Hashem for him to be there then there’s no better Gan Eden he could experience than fulfilling Hashem’s rotzon.
Only Hashem knows why these tragedies happened. At the very least, if you’re running a camp or taking your children on an outing learn from these sad stories to be more careful. If putting your own life in danger doesn’t concern you because you have special heavenly protection, don’t endanger others. Don’t make your children or someone else’s child the korbon to be meorer Klal Yisroel to teshuva.
By the way, the pool situation in Lakewood is horrendous. Pools with no dedicated gate around them is a tremendous sakanah. My neighbor got rid of his after his young son nearly died from entering the pool on his own. Why do we need to get to a near tragedy for people to act responsibly? Why do young innocent children need to be korbonos of negligence? Are we meant to rely on Nisssim?Rav Avigdor Miller said once we shouldn’t blame Hashem for tragedies caused by our own negligence. Of course everything comes from Hashem but we are meorer Midas hadin when we put ourselves in harm’s Way. We need a major education campaign among Chareidi yidden about outdoor safety. This galus is bitter enough let’s not make it worse by being negligent. My son’s daycamp went on a trip in a 15 passenger van & the driver was clocking 100 miles per hour, he could have easily flipped & killed a few kids. We need education & accountability to stop these non stop tragedies. Let’s do teshuva on vinishmartem meod lenafshoseichem.
I thought you would ask why are yidin copying non Jewish music & calling it jewish aren’t we Ehrlich? Much of today’s chareidi music are borrowed pieces of non Jewish techno beats. Some of it are direct copies of non Jewish songs. What happened to us? I saw a music video of a Chusid dancing like an African American to heavy disco, what does this mean?
I’ll need to start a new thread for this question.Girls have a mitzvah to marry in order to enable boys to be mekayem their mitzva (Ran in Keddushin). The Rambam also states that mederabonon a women should not remain single in order to avoid chashad. There’s no question that al pi hashkofas Torah a women was created to be an Eizer kinegdo & bring children to the world. The fact that tragically this doesn’t always work out doesn’t change the way we should raise our children. We should instead try to solve the problem we are facing.
We are following the Halacha stated in the Rambam hilchos deos Chapter 6:
1)
It is natural for a man’s character and actions to be influenced by his friends and associates and for him to follow the local norms of behavior. Therefore, he should associate with the righteous and be constantly in the company of the wise, so as to learn from their deeds. Conversely, he should keep away from the wicked who walk in darkness, so as not to learn from their deeds.This is [implied by] Solomon’s statement (Proverbs 13:20): “He who walks with the wise will become wise, while one who associates with fools will suffer.” Similarly, [Psalms 1:1] states: “Happy is the man who has not followed the advice of the wicked.”
A person who lives in a place where the norms of behavior are evil and the inhabitants do not follow the straight path should move to a place where the people are righteous and follow the ways of the good.
If all the places with which he is familiar and of which he hears reports follow improper paths, as in our times, or if he is unable to move to a place where the patterns of behavior are proper, because of [the presence of] bands of raiding troops, or for health reasons, he should remain alone in seclusion as [Eichah 3:28] states: “Let him sit alone and be silent.”
If they are wicked and sinful and do not allow him to reside there unless he mingle with them and follow their evil behavior, he should go out to caves, thickets, and deserts [rather than] follow the paths of sinners as [Jeremiah 9:1] states: “Who will give me a lodging place for wayfarers, in the desert.”
Credit: Chabad.orgWe are living in a time where most of humanity does not believe in or follow the values of the Torah. We need to maintain a cultural distance from them if we are to remain loyal to Hashem & his Torah. Even if some individuals are able to to resist to assimilate with the masses around us, our community as a whole needs to isolate ourselves culturally if we wish to survive. The modern Orthodox community is a perfect example of frum Jews trying to take the honey of the secular world without being bitten by the snake of atheism that abounds. Many of their young people are leaving Yiddishkeit.
This idea assumes there’s not enough dating for boys as well as girls.
There is no shidduch crisis for boys, only for girls. Most boys have more than enough girls to date & they are getting married. It’s the girls who are not getting enough dates because there are more girls than boys of marriagable age.
Why would a serious boy hang out with random girls when he has a list of shidduchim waiting for him to go out on a date?
The non serious boys might love this idea, but I doubt it will bring the results we want.People often mixup psychological disturbance with spiritual failure. A person who walks around thinking that others think he’s a rasha is most likely suffering from depression, OCD, or paranoia. Really evil people generally think very highly of themselves & excuse their bad behavior. Please seek the help of a doctor who’s able to treat emotional pain. There’s no reason for you to walk around feeling so much pain Inside.
It seems that YWN believes that most of its readers would like to see photos of young attractive women on this site. This may be correct but is a michshol to the male readership. I wish there would be a truly Chareidi news site without the female photos but I’m not aware of one.
Chassidim are certainly makpid on the mitzva dioraisoh of Elias Shma bizmanah. It’s motzi shem ra to suggest otherwise. I have many chassidish relatives who be aghast at the suggestion that they aren’t makpid on this. Please do your homework. The nefesh hachaim was referring to a small group of people in his time. Inapplicable to the chassidim of our time. Of course there are amhaaratzim in every community that don’t know basic halacha but don’t insinuate that this is acceptable behavior.
How do the chassidim manage to keep their tuition manageable despite having large families & many lower income parents? Because every member of the chassidus takes responsibility for its mosdos. Even after their children have graduated & moved away.
We need every member of the community to share the burden of chinuch habonim not just the parents.
The current yeshiva model does not encourage the broader community to share the burden.
I don’t know of a solution other than lowering our lifestyle or increasing Parnassa opportunities.People will make the choices they believe is best for them. Unless you are part of a chassidus there is no way to institute a community wide takana. Very few boys are interested in being forced to go out twice if they are sure after 1 date it’s not for them. It may even be halachikly problematic.
Improving your appearance, personality, learning/Parnassa capabilities will make you a more sought after marriage partner.It’s a terrible thing that some people are unemployed. Let’s make a communal takana that no one can go to work until everyone finds a job. The job must earn at least $20 per hour.
Happy Trolling.The solution is simple, get a Panasonic phone that allows you to block a number with the push of a button. Most of these robo calls come from the same companies, I rarely get an annoying call anymore, they’ve all been blocked.
I highly recommend the book “The one minute masmid” by rabbi Jonathan Rietti. It describes a system of learning where even someone who feels discouraged about his learning can develop into a Talmid chacham. I know of others who felt a real chizuk in limud Hatorah after reading this very interesting book.
Don’t assume limud Hatorah is just not for you just because learning in yeshiva was difficult.Lehavdil bein Kodesh lechol. It’s part of levush Yisroel which differentiates us from the umos haolom. Dressing uniquely sends a message that we are different & are expected to act differently. It’s a hanhaga tovah especially at a time when we are becoming culturally affected by the society around us.
No respectable mekubal advertises his miraculous powers. Every month another charlatan comes to town trying to make a buck. Hashem doesn’t need these intermediaries to bring a yeshuah.
YWN should ban their ads.Every tool Hashem gives us can be abused including photos. I understood that the question was about the responsible use of a photo when looking into a shidduch.
Pictures only show a small amount of persons chein but they are still a useful piece of information.
Rav Matisyahu Solomon said a bachur should know that when he goes under the chuppa he takes along all his taavos with him. Being overly righteous while dating is a recipe for unhappiness later.
I don’t think it’s a chessed do date someone & then reject them for something that you would know in one glance at a photo.It all depends on the needs/values of the individual involved. If externals are high on the list then by all means pictures are useful. If not, then why limit your choices based on a photo.
David Lichtenstein posed this question to Rabbi Sorcher of Detroit & Rabbi Shafier of the Shmuz both endorsed the looking at a photo for shidduch purposes.The consensus among the poskim is that this din only applies to Adar sheini. Let’s be patient.
As I posted earlier, a person who goes in public without tzniusdig is a mazik es horabim. This is very different than someone struggling with a personal yetzer horah. I don’t live in the 5towns so it’s not my place to criticize them. Most are probably tinokes shenishbu. I this is a problem because whenever my relative from the 5towns comes for a simcha we cringe over how she will be dressed.
Tznius is not just a bein odom limokom obligation, it’s a bein odom lichaveiro obligation. A woman who dresses untzniusdig is a mazik es horabim. She is a walking michshol to every man than sees her. The Steipler called these people spiritual terrorists ruining the neshamos of those who see them. Many of these yidden are tinokes shenishbu who don’t understand how damaging their behavior is to others.
Does anyone know where Zohar Aghbashoff is today? He was very popular in the late 80’s & I haven’t heard about him since then.