Forum Replies Created
Taking it to a lab? Is this within the parameters of halacha? Is it within the bounds of sanity? Explain to me like I was born yesterday
Some occasional harchaka from your spouse is a big segula for avoiding a divorce! If you able to be marchik your shver… that is a double segula for shalom bayis!
Covid is proven to affect fertility. Bari v’shema bari adif
Aside from the fact they are cheating giluy rosh, they just look ridiculous and gaudy. They do not look nice or ‘normal’ unless you’re trying to dress like the 19th century.
The only ones that look nice and fashionable are the really expensive ones. Like the ones that people use for professional modeling and cosmetic commercials. Those cost several thousand dollars and are meant to flaunt beauty and draw attention.
So either someone is wearing a wig for pritzus or else they look ridiculous and 100 years old.
All sheitels should be ‘noheg bahen isur’September 1, 2021 5:47 pm at 5:47 pm in reply to: Different levels of religious observance (frumkeit) #2005178
Avi, you’ve never heard of human trafficking? There are so many variations of human trafficking, not just of females. There is slave labor on the market everywhere! From India and China to right here in the USA under your nose. Just look up the stats from the FBI. And that’s just illegal slavery. There are dozens of countries which approve of unofficial forks of slavery. They just use loopholes, extortion, or merely call it a different name. Here are some: China (they enslave people outright), India, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, UAE, EGYPT, and TURKEY. These countries approve of enslaving people. I’m not talking about indentured servitude. And there are so many others which turn a blind eye.
My point is there are massive numbers of slaves today which dwarf the number of slaves throughout all of human history. So have societies truly progressed past slavery when it has increased exponentially?September 1, 2021 10:48 am at 10:48 am in reply to: Different levels of religious observance (frumkeit) #2004944
Avi, there are currently more slaves than there ever were in all of human history. Just because governments outlawed slavery, it didn’t magically disappear. It’s gone beneath their radarSeptember 1, 2021 10:42 am at 10:42 am in reply to: Different levels of religious observance (frumkeit) #2004946
Also, you apparently have no idea of what goes on in militaries the world over. Eishes yefas toar is very relevant. The avos harishonim were extremely careful not to have any machshavos zaros at all times, which can sometimes be virtually impossible in the heat of combat. I cannot think of any mitzvah I’m the Torah that is no longer needed. If anything, humanity has regressed tremendously, not progressed like every chacham thinks today. Even goyim (the smart ones) will admit that societies everywhere are regressing rapidly. Look at the injustice everywhere, for just one example…August 31, 2021 12:18 am at 12:18 am in reply to: Different levels of religious observance (frumkeit) #2004465
I did not mean to insult you. Hopefully you don’t mean to either
I just actually went over that Mishna berura now.
He brings the Pri Megadim as literally saying it is NOT ME’AKEV.
“V’CHOL ZEH KDEI LATZEIS YIDEI HAMITZVAH KESIKUNAH, HUH DI’AVED YOTZEH KOL SHE’KIVEIN LATZES LEVAD – PRI MEGADIM”
Hilchos sukah siman tav resh chaf vav, halacha alef
So the actual Pri Megadim you mentioned says the complete hefech of what you said.
I’m not one to rub people’s nose in something, but you seem to be a little quarrelsome. Please just stop.
I didn’t understand the Mishna berura as quoting the pri megadim that it’s mamash le’ikuva.
I never said the pashut pshat in the pasuk is childish chalilah. You said that, not me.
I said that it’s childish to think that it is really the ikar taam for the mitzva of ahavas hager. And I will say again it is childish to think that. It is a reminder and an azhara to be mechazek us to love gerim. It isn’t THE REASON. Pashut pshat is that it’s ridiculous to think so. Hashem wants us to love gerim because we are rachmanim. If we weren’t gerim, the mitzva wouldn’t disappear.
You know what’s bizayon hatorah? To use it as a spade with which to glorify…
No one holds you aren’t yotzei sukah if you don’t have in mind lemaan yedu. It’s that he didn’t fulfill the mitzva kara’uy. But no one holds he wasn’t yotzeh.
My point was that we don’t love gerim because we too were gerim. That would be kind of childish. The Torah is reminding us that we should know better than to give a hard time to gerim because we too experienced the same thing. That’s hardly the main focus of why it’s important to love gerim. I think anyone with common sense can figure out why Hashem wants us to love gerim without having to say we were gerim too. It’s the same as our obligation to not be harsh to a yasom and almanah. Loving a ger needs a bigger reminder because people tend to exclude those who are mufka.
Ki gerim heyisem is similar to ki bichipazon yatzasa
They are taamei hamitzvos. That doesn’t necessarily mean they are the actual reasons. We don’t really eat matza just because we left in a hurry. That’s what we tell a 5 year old, but there is a whole lot more.
But let me know if you do eat matza only for this reason or if you do love gerim only because you too were a ger in mitzrayim.
Thanks for eloquently summarizing the shakla vetarya.
However, I did not say that love is inherent and cannot created. Look back to my original response to you. I explicitly said he should learn to love her or else leave her (for her sake) because staying would only bring her misery.
I also said in a later reply in that thread that love can be generated through effort and familiarity.
We actually both agree 100% so I’m not sure why you were initially surprised.
The neshama EMANATES from Hashem. Think about that, and it should clarify things.
He is out of the hospital, but still sick and taking oxygen
Thanks everyone. He’s doing better, but still hospitalizedAugust 19, 2021 2:11 pm at 2:11 pm in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2001157
Avirah, your understanding of this Rambam is not meduyak. You added in your own hagaha (idk where you came up with this) that ‘ohavah kefufo’ doesn’t mean love but rather providing. This is a false interpretation and a real twist. The Rambam already says to provide, this is in addition to providing.
Why a woman is not instructed to love her husband could be because it comes naturally more for a woman to love her spouse than it does for a man. Also, the woman’s need to feel loved is more integral to her than it is for a man. (Not saying men don’t need to feel loved sometimes, but I think anyone who is married [and I’m not] might resonate with the reality that the wife sometimes experiences different emotions and expresses it differently based on circumstances.)
Regardless, the halacha is clear as it is stated. It might be irrelevant for most people, but I just wanted to point out the specific obligation inherent in a Jewish marriage for those who might have thought otherwise.August 19, 2021 1:06 am at 1:06 am in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2001224
Avirah, your understanding of this Rambam is not meduyak. You added in your own hagaha that ‘ohavah kefufo’ doesn’t mean love but rather providing. This is a false interpretation. The Rambam already says to provide, this is in addition to providing.
Why a woman is not instructed to love her husband could be because it comes naturally more for a woman to love her spouse than it does for a man. (Or more specifically, that a man carries the greater imperative to initiate his show of love.) And there are several examples in the gemara of Amoraim who placed significance on a certain level of ‘romanticism.’ This is a whole different topic though.
Regardless, the halacha is clear as it is stated. It might be irrelevant for most people, but I just wanted to point out the specific obligation inherent in a Jewish marriage for those who might have thought otherwise.August 18, 2021 11:39 pm at 11:39 pm in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2001184
All my replies are being censored. I’d cut back some if I even knew what’s so controversialAugust 18, 2021 11:39 pm at 11:39 pm in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2001183
Avirah, your interpretation is wrong. It is not meduyak. But apparently all my replies are censored.
Hurry! Call them immediately to let them catch their error! Or… invest it and if and when they ask for it back, just return the principle. If you feel guilty, make a donation to Verizon and AT&T, since they’re the recipients of free infrastructure cash.August 18, 2021 11:51 am at 11:51 am in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2001016
Hilchos ishus, perek tes vav: halacha yud tes
But you could go ahead and omit that one if you feel that halacha is too goyishAugust 18, 2021 11:46 am at 11:46 am in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2001010
Avirah, so according to you the Rambam is goyish chalilah. It definitely is a halacha to love one’s wife. You’re the one making things up. I never said love is spontaneous. It can be generated through effort and sincerity. What’s goyish is your idea that it’s not a priority to love one’s wife. I’ll tell you exactly where in Mishna Torah it says. Stay tunedAugust 17, 2021 5:34 pm at 5:34 pm in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2000824
Moderators, please post my comment. It is absolutely astounding and also terrifying that someone doesn’t know it’s a chiyuv to love one’s wife sincerely! Look in Mishna Torah!!! It is a chiyuv, a mitzva, halacha, a chova!!! How do people not know this??? A shame and a disgrace! Even if it weren’t a halacha (which it is), how can you not understand the achzariyus involved by having a ‘loveless’ marriage? I’ll say something a little controversial and maybe sexist. It is at the very core a woman’s existence and human function to be loved by their husband.August 17, 2021 8:50 am at 8:50 am in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2000595
Avram, I would strongly suggest he fulfill his obligation to love his wife or else consider finding a different wife he can love. Remaining in a cold marriage is not an option, and it is definitely in violation of halacha to not love your wife.
Anyone who lacks a cheshek to learn Torah and is not motivated to grow in learning should likewise absolutely not continue the path of kollel learning. We’re all for as many people as possible to learn full time, but there may be a significant number of people who are in the wrong occupation if they’re not committed.August 15, 2021 11:33 pm at 11:33 pm in reply to: Is the frum “business/economic model” sustainable? #2000176
My shoes do smell, I happen to have sweaty feet.
Not everyone is meant to learn full time in kollel. What if he just isn’t growing in learning and knowledge? What if the cheshek and motivation just isn’t strong? That doesn’t mean he’s gonna make it big in business either! There are many seemingly ‘mediocre’ (by our standards at least) type guys who aren’t cut out to become neither a talmid chacham or a fancy gvir. I think perhaps this is what huju is pointing at. For some (or many), it feels like they are left behind and forgotten. They are stuck between the two ends of the platinum standard, so instead they get nothing of nothing. We need a proper and dignified system in place for these yidden to live as honorable and cherished Yidden. Maybe their children will be the next iluyim, gvirim, rashkebahag, etc. Or maybe they will be just like them! We don’t want to leave them behind.
It’s ok, no need to panic. This is just the best setup in American history for an absolutely crushing defeat for democrats next year. Well, unless they cheat of course… yeah we may be in for some major trouble. Cheating aside, Republicans are in a very good position to win. Of course Republicans are the best at losing and doing nothing when they win. But you should know that American youth is trending increasingly more conservative, contrary to what they tell you that it’s only old white guys.
Did you create this expression?
Go to Maven Motors in Richmond Hill. They are professional, knowledgeable, honest bnei Torah.
I definitely understand your perspective 100%
On the other hand, why not just get it – lehashvos hadvarim?
Does it hurt? What’s the harm?
I myself also got very sick with covid last year (I am 27 with no health issues, and I was preparing myself to accept death as real possibility. Hodu LaShem I eventually got better.)
I have the antibodies, so I most likely did not need the vaccine.
But I got the vaccines anyway! Because why not?! It makes others feel better, which is probably the most important reason to get vaccinated – it’s very important not to cause other Yidden anguish, especially your family members regardless if they are right or wrong. Don’t you want to help others so they shouldn’t be stressed out? Also, if there is even the remote possibility that the vaccines will protect me from getting sick – even if it’s just a cold, so that’s good too. It’s like extra credit. I’ll admit, I got very sick each time I got the vaccine because having antibodies could cause your body to react strongly to the vaccine. But it wasn’t a big deal, I got it over with. I’m done. So nu, why wouldn’t you just do it?
Full disclosure (I am definitely not interested in getting a booster because I already got very sick twice from from the first two.) But at least I can truthfully state I am fully vaccinated.
One thousand dollar bills are even more convenient. Why do all the bundles of cash in movies show as hundred dollar bills?
How about the time they caught me at Ben Gurion with a carry on full of cigarette cartons? Oy what a moment that was! I feel bad for the guy who had to burn all those cigarettes though. Those are the rules!
Be well, Shana tova
After reading about your experiences and troubles, I understand much more than before about your perspective and your sentiment. No one should judge you after knowing what you’ve been through, but that shouldn’t mean people can expected to give the benefit of doubt in this scenario since the circumstances are very uncommon. Keep seeking the truth. Don’t draw conclusions from others’ mistakes.
Hashem relates to us as the Av Harachamim, an all merciful father. We are his children. However, He is also the Melech. He is our king. We cannot pick and choose which of His commandments to obey. It is futile to rationalize the purpose of the mitzvos. The king has commanded us to keep the mitzvos, and there is din vacheshbon for everyone. However stark this may seem, there is no need to despair or feel pressure. We must accept the reality and obey the Torah with joy.
As for connecting to Hashem through mitzvos, this is a very subtle connection felt exclusively by the soul. It is unlikely for most to feel this connection in this world with our physical bodies. The connection is definitely happening though, and the result will be manifest in the world to come.
See how the Ramchal explains this in derech Hashem for a full discussion. He says there that sometimes we may feel a much smaller effect of the connection that spills over from the actual connection happening. But it is just a much smaller he’arah from the greater one.July 16, 2021 2:45 pm at 2:45 pm in reply to: Are you allowed to give Tzeddakah/charity to Non-Jews #1992440
Also, it’s not unequivocally true that the us military serves no purpose to defend us and preserve our freedom today just because WWII is over. The entire world economy depends on US might. The US almost primarily patrols the world’s shipping routes. There are many other important things the military does aside from overseas skirmishes.July 16, 2021 2:37 pm at 2:37 pm in reply to: Are you allowed to give Tzeddakah/charity to Non-Jews #1992438
Aviradearah, the majority of Israelis know next to nothing about Torah and yiddishkeit. It’s this attitude towards ‘zionists’ that keeps the hatred for charedim burning. It is for us to stop ‘harping’ instead of sitting idly by while expecting them to understand. They hardly even know what shabbos and kosher really is. Why are we judging them so harshly as if they are mumar l’hachis. They know less about Torah than many Jews here in the US. It was a machlokes between Reb Elyashiv and Reb Shlomo Zalman whether Israelis are considered mumarim or tinokos shenishbu. I think we can safely assume (for the purposes of achdus, not necessarily halacha) that things have rapidly changed since then.
Also, no offense but I personally think just based on historical facts (aside from all the politics) that it’s just false to claim that Arabs were nicer before and the zionists made them hate us more. I think insisting on this whitewash of history would be ‘harping.’ Either way, it’s not relevant to today as last time I checked the medina was established more than 70 years ago so it’s too late to convince the Arabs to like us ‘again.’
I feel for you, but it’s important to not to generalize all orthodox Jews or further yet orthodox Judaism itself based on the conduct of individuals. Your mother needs to appreciate you for who you are, regardless of what her yenta friend says.
You don’t want to be judged by others, yet you seem to be doing exactly just that. I don’t know you personally, so I cannot acuse you of anything other than what you have admitted. The fact that you believe you have a better connection to the Almighty than others is clearly reflective of a tremendous gaavah (haughtiness).
There are few things which we can say about an individual that the Creator hates him. Unfortunately for you (and tragically), gaavah is something that Hashem hates someone for. You might want to reevaluate your loving connection with the All Merciful, especially before so harshly condemning others who are moser nefesh to keep the mitzvos.
I have ADHD. I personally prefer a minyan that’s not too slow and not too fast either. But what you want just seems like a major shlep. If you can’t say every word, then don’t! Keep to what’s absolutely required. It’s much better than having a miserable tfila every day.
Commonsaychel, you have the statistics or you’re just using your ‘saychel?’ I think it’s the other way around or lively the same exact rate. I don’t why you feel a constant need to spread malicious slander against other Jews (and Eretz Yisrael too). I think your saychel has brought you far enough. It’s your stop, you can get off here.
I think both are 100% true and don’t contradict one another. You find the thing you stumble over most often. That is what you must focus on because it is likely your purpose. Additionally, you discover something about yourself that you feel a strong netiya towards (inclination), something to build upon.
So you see, the two ideas go hand in hand together. One is a focus on the negative in which you need to channel that negative and construct it into positive force in your life. The other is a focus on the positive, something you feel within you which you can build into career of mitzvos – your very own field of expertise! Every one of us is a specialist in our respective careers of maasim tovim.
Full disclosure, I’m single so I cannot relate. Still, it seems like you need a new Rabbi yesterday. He may be an outstanding talmid chacham, but he clearly isn’t at all knowledgeable about adhd. He is giving you a bad eitzah. You should get a new Rabbi or at least have two, one of which can properly advise you.
Your wife doesn’t need you to be more like your neighbor, she didn’t marry your neighbor. She needs you to be the best YOU. There is only one you, so be yourself and be the best YOU can using only your strengths and potential. She will truly come to appreciate you and realize you are the best man in the entire world.
I have ADHD. I don’t perceive it as a problem, an obstacle, not even a disorder. It is who I am and part of my personality. It is what sets me aside from most. I think differently and see the world differently. Use it to your strengths. Take advantage of it. It is only a disorder in the eyes of others. It becomes a disorder for you when you succumb to other’s control. Don’t let them dictate to you about your perceived ‘disorder.’ If they want to help and give advice or words of encouragement, then that’s great. With more people, you can learn new insights. If they are just trying to be the opposition, the you must ignore them as if they were flies because that’s what they are to you.
Laziness and depression start to manifest from adhd only when you despair of hope. If you make a plan and set up a routine, (routine and focus is a major challenge) you’ll start to realize you’ve never had such good days in your life as these, and you’ll wonder at how awesome life can be. Forming a deep connection through tefila will also help immensely.
Zvid, Bruna, yeshayvav, Paltiel, elitzur, Chetzron, Elishama, Azariah, etc.
Why are these names and so many others from the chumash and gemara not in style?
Learn to make your own dips. They will be much more tasty than the store bought products. Take the extra money and give it to a yasom instead of supporting a rich man’s summer adventure
Yes. We are.
Not exclusively in regards to cases like this, but more so in how we allow the זפת שעל פני המים to enter our communities. It’s not a contradiction to be welcoming yet simultaneously steadfast and sharp.