Forum Replies Created
September 14, 2011 11:45 pm at 11:45 pm in reply to: NOT TZNIUS "BUBBIES" (also some fish, honey, and vinegar) #1200265
I’ll take the tangent over blatant lashon hara any day.
What does that bumper sticker say? Oh, yeah: Do teshuva now, beat the holiday rush.
Hatzlacha. Sorry I can’t help you. I have a kitchen aid and love it and once kneading was demystified, now knead everything by hand. (OK, I lost the dough hook years ago…)
Is all else equal among the options? Challah’s not the only thing you’ll be using it for, right?
Whatever get, use in good health and with simcha.September 14, 2011 7:20 pm at 7:20 pm in reply to: NOT TZNIUS "BUBBIES" (also some fish, honey, and vinegar) #1200221
To mdd: you’re the first person who called me on that and you’re right, I just looked it up. Sanctimony is “feigned” piety and I have no doubt that most people are sincere. I guess I’m still conflicted over this medium and expect people on such a madrega not to be on the internet for anything less than business, not shmoozing, especially in a mixed forum.September 14, 2011 2:18 pm at 2:18 pm in reply to: NOT TZNIUS "BUBBIES" (also some fish, honey, and vinegar) #1200184
I LOVE sanctimony on the internet. Especially the coffee room. Say, Sanctimony on the Internet would be an excellent name….
This is interesting. We never learned gemara. Sure, lots of mefarshim, but not gemara inside. The way it’s been presented is that the standard BY chinuch isn’t preparing us for learning like the boys’ chinuch, e.g. flashcards, starting at a young age, focusing largely on gemara, etc. For good reason: it’s not for dabbling and women don’t have the time men do. I could go further and say it’s not satisfying for most women because it’s so theoretical. If I want intellectual stimulation there are classical sefarim or lehavdil secular stuff.
Now one might argue that to really, really understand even Rashi you need some extensive background but considering that we start so young, for boys and girls, I would venture to say that the mefarshim as in Mikraos Gedolos and contemporary mefarshim are still of a very different quality. And they help us understand pshat as well as provide the hashkafic basis for what we’re supposed to get out of our learning. (Rav Hirsch is a must for any teachers, as much as is feasible.)
To on the ball: lashon hakodesh does have the concept of ayin tova.
Supporting per se is not a bad thing, but I feel terrible for this girl. If this is going to be an issue shadchanim shouldn’t dance around it or finesse. If a girl’s parents say they can’t/won’t support, they have to be upfront so no hearts get broken.
When I went to sem thirty years ago, and this was a US sem, we had some older women (some a bit older) in our class. Myabe that’s an option. There are also night classes, and amazing classes online or by phone. If you have the discipline to set up a schedule you could grow immeasurably, especially if you establish personal contact with any of your favorites.
Are you going into 12th grade or did you just graduate?
To oyvey: can you let us batlanos who don’t ever open a gemara in on this? Thanks.
I assume HaleiVi is replying to me. If so, thanks.
How did the expression “whose ox is being gored” get popular in the general world when it’s clear from the sugya (which I have no intention of getting into) that it’s the ox that’s doing the goring?
There’s always talk about getting the boys who won’t be klei kodesh out working earlier. How about a learner-earner model, where boys work and learn? These boys/young men will be able to learn substantially for years if done right.
To add to minyan gal, you might be able to get away with healthiER. Maybe some applesauce, less sugar, etc. Probably better tasting and less artificial than total substitutions.
Haifagirl, to me, underuse of apostrophes is much less annoying than overuse.
Why do people bring up this kind of stuff here, in a public forum, instead of privately asking a rav?
Can threads be deleted?
Just be excited! And grateful to your parents for giving you this opportunity. Stay real. Spend as little money as you can: you will be very glad to have got into good habits after the first few months.
Don’t fall into any I’m so homesick ruts around the yomim tovim – you’re going to be in E”Y (I’m assuming, or somewhere different and interesting) for goodness sakes! Of course you’ll miss your family but not as much as you might think.
Find someone in the sem to have create a really good relationship with. That’ll take time but you will be so glad to have a mentor, along with your parents, for reality checks through life.
Hatzlacha, and may we all be there sooner than school’s scheduled to start.
Health, TSH is enough to screen for hyperthyroidism. It’s never enough to treat it since TSH can stay suppressed for quite some time.
And it’s never enough for hypothyroidism. Google “The TSH Wars.”
To anyone who needs help: please get it. Iy’H after you do you will then be in a place to help others with your (let’s hope!) positive experiences.
As an aside, anxiety, diarrhea, and tremors are classic symptoms of hyperthyroidism. If there’s not prior history of anxiety, ask your dr. for a full thyroid panel.
B”H I qualified my first post.
And I had no idea that Rabbi Twerski, shlit”a said this.
But yeah, context is everything. I’m glad this is dying down. May I suggest that no one from this peanut gallery called the coffee room say ANYTHING without reading the full paragraph.
And to the OP, if the controversy is still roiling, please pass this suggestion on to the hockers.
Useful info for anyone who sings Tzur Mishelo.
Aries, the magazine came out before that tragedy.
One could also argue, did they tie it in to the tragedy of the three gedolim? Strikes a different chord, true, but this would have been the time when, with shloshim coming up, we might have been as roused to action.
And the words at face value were re Hashem letting this happen. Assuming that is the exact quote, proper context, etc.
You know ladies, there are other places than the coffee room. This is just not going to work out and why I only check in intermittently these days.
to Englishman: if you’re not married yet, give your kallah a wrapped copy of a book by Robert Munsch called The Paperback Princess. Trust me, you don’t have to read it. Tell your kallah if she draws inspiration for her wedding gown from there, kol hakavod.
to PBA: good point. But this will not be the first time in the history of mankind or womankind this has been done. Seamstresses, especially who work with frum kallahs, are very creative and experienced.
smartcookie: I hear you. B”H my city’s blessed with not just a beautiful gemach but one that works at gemach prices. Any kallah who has to spend near 1K on a wedding gown needs to exhaust all other options first.
Yeah, it is for just one night. But yeah, she should also be a princess. There’s a way to do it within reason.
To bombmaniac: my apologies. I have enough beefs myself. (Don’t get me started on apostrophes!) I fully understand but can’t guarantee not writing in the colloquial in the future.
Men, get out of here. You’re not being helpful. (Bpt, can’t wait till your daughter tells you she deserves xyz.)
Shells: for mother of the bride, ok. For bride, no.
Gemachs: so don’t go for the gown with the holes. What’s the problem? Now, if this is one of those gemachs that charges an arm and a leg then yeah, see if you can get a less expensive sample or whatever if you’d like.
Is this gown final sale? Can you take it to a seamstress or is there a seamstress on staff to consult with? I saw a stunning gown last year that started off as a strapless dress, had straps put on for security, and it came with a jacket over it. Very beautiful, real fifties type elegance. (You could see Audrey Hepburn in it easily.)
I didn’t read the article yet but I do have access to it (I don’t generally buy it, nothing against Ami, just not in the budget).
I don’t know if this was the right thing to say, but I’d heard the news before my son went to camp and I knew I had to say something in the limited time I had. Among other things was that he’s going to hear a lot of stuff, some of it true, some of it not, but he had to know that, as impossible as it sounds, Hashem had a reason for letting this happen and Hashem was involved.
Maybe I shouldn’t say anything, not knowing the context. But taking the words at face value, yeah, problematic.
As for exploiting, that’s a whole nother thread.
I didn’t know Amy Winehouse died. How sad. I don’t know the details but I know how sad her life was. Let’s daven and do what we can so our kids – all our kids – have wonderful Jewish exposure and opportunities, and I hope that she’s finding some level of peace in the Olam Haemes.
It’s not ok.
Why do you ask? Did you read the Mishpacha article or the article, study, whatever it was based on? You’ll get answers as to why there.
Let’s all try to light up the world and our immediate environs with simcha and goodness clearly rooted in the Torah and the love Hashem has for all of us.
Re Binyomin1: many people have experienced that the girls research first. The boys have so many names that they can narrow it down by focusing on the yeses first.
Personally, I’m glad I’m not obligated to learn it. I don’t have the time to invest in it, and I would really not find it satisfying. With all this, I still not only have tremendous respect for gemara but I spend considerable effort facilitating its being learned by members of my family.July 20, 2011 8:42 pm at 8:42 pm in reply to: A third of Litvish families I know, have one or more single daughters 25 and up #909457
To GAW: you can’t bring a BT couple (or half BT couple) as proof. I know of such families. It’s a beautiful thing when it works; why should children be deprived of a parent who is a fundamentally decent and loving person? Why should the children be deprived of a chance to grow up with shalom bayis? I could continue.
Comparing a couple who decide to overcome these differences to stay together because they found each other at a different place and want to stay together to a couple that chooses to embark on this experiment, without the same kind of starting out common ground is apples and oranges.
Thanks another name, and the rest, you beat me to it.
Droid, you’re just gonna have to establish your bona fides. I haven’t been through it myself but have seen enough people who have that I can’t make such statements.
And last time I checked – and please correct me if I’m wrong, folks – we’re not Catholic. Yes, the mizbeach weeps, yes it’s absolutely painful, but B”H it’s there as a halachically valid option.July 19, 2011 4:58 pm at 4:58 pm in reply to: A third of Litvish families I know, have one or more single daughters 25 and up #909415
To adams: that is an interesting suggestion. A big factor in the crisis is that we have so many girls who want a serious learner, and while this is beautiful, there is no way they would, could, or should consider someone who isn’t shtark in his Yiddishkeit. Now if there was a large pool of working boys who are serious learners in their 5 – 9 hours, well, we might be on to something there.
BTW, why in the world should the less frum boys agree? And if they would be interested, why shouldn’t they be the ones to “compromise” and be willing to have a home with higher standards of kashrus, chinuch, and shmiras Shabbos?
And a P.S. Marriage has to be built on mutual respect. Not just “to have children.” Children will know if there’s anything less.
And BTW, while this is a couple’s great dream, they get married not “to have children” but to build a bayis neeman b’Yisrael.Encouraging people to get married without shared goals is not in klal Yisrael’s best interests.
a thinker, I think you’re confusing being dan lekaf zechus with some general well-warranted compassion for the mentally ill.July 15, 2011 3:33 pm at 3:33 pm in reply to: A third of Litvish families I know, have one or more single daughters 25 and up #909358
I’m with DaasYochid. Encouraging the boys to come back early means that they’re not going to E”Y because that’s the best place to be learning at this particular time, it means that they’re being just as much a part of a herd as the thaw date at BMG as you describe.
IF, and note I capitalized if, IF boys do go to learn in E”Y it needs to be part of the organic process of their Torah growth. No other cheshbonos. There has already been enough damage done to our kids by arbitrary pigeonholing rather than a concerted chanoch l’naar approach.
To love a yid: you need a rav. You need someone you can say these things to on a regular basis to clarify if you are correct or not.
If you check out the Artscroll on Av Harachamim you will read that real nekama is up to Hashem. We are not vengeful or out for blood. On the other hand, we must hate evil, we must protect ourselves and society, and do that by appropriate means. If part of the process will be helping this monster get the help he needs, so be it. But he will have to live the rest of his life under tight supervision. Someone who’s familiar with protocol for the criminally insane might be able to better comment.July 14, 2011 3:39 pm at 3:39 pm in reply to: A third of Litvish families I know, have one or more single daughters 25 and up #909347
So what AZ’s trying to say is that the 70 can be quoted specifically for what is in that kol koreih, they have good feelings about NASI in general, but no one other than whoever’s on the actual rabbinic advisory board can be quoted as endorsing everything NASI or its spokespeople propose?
Re makeup for/on Shabbos: as nice as it is, and often the only opportunity our girls have if school proscribes it, I think we also don’t want to set our girls to feel that without makeup (e.g. Shabbos makeup is unavailable, three day yom tov, other factors) they just don’t feel good. So try to strike a balance.
To Droid: is that because the right wing of Chareidikeit isn’t on the internet?
Sanctimony on the Internet would make an excellent name for a rock band.
Ladies, think about when you and your friends did. If you can hold off till almost then, because kids grow up faster, you’re doing good.
The question is what they should be allowed to wear. My approach is whatever the school allows, and a little more liberal. The school has very strict guidelines, e.g. no nail polish because it wouldn’t be constructive to spend time checking hands. So if the kids wear b’tampt make up, and DON’T break school rules while in school, you’re probably ok. This is assuming this is your school’s approach as well. If their approach is that it’s never acceptable, then don’t go against the school.July 12, 2011 8:35 pm at 8:35 pm in reply to: A third of Litvish families I know, have one or more single daughters 25 and up #909332
Re Pac-Man’s ben 18 l’chuppah: right, because we do everything else the mishna says, or at least try to.
It’s a natural progression, is it not? I don’t think one can pick one stage randomly.
Do you mind sharing what condition this is for?July 6, 2011 11:28 pm at 11:28 pm in reply to: Two points from this weeks Yated – Kollel & Agudah #787365
Midwesterner, b’shaa tova!
Rabbi Birnbaum brings up an interesting point. Perhaps parental support goes further out of town. Though the parents doing the support still have to deal with the issues of their own current tuition, etc. expenses. (Or if these are their younger children in kollel, possibly they have to deal with helping their parents out. We’ll be seeing a generation coming up that has not saved for retirement, is B”H living longer so have more long-term care need issues, etc.) I’m not sure about more jobs being available, it’s all proportional and depends on what kind of jobs you’re looking for. For someone coming out of kollel, I see such a family as still needing support during the transition time. It’s probably harder to find a decent job with out a serious school time commitment out of town than it is in the east coast tri-state area. I’d love to see him address these kinds of issues.July 5, 2011 5:37 pm at 5:37 pm in reply to: Two points from this weeks Yated – Kollel & Agudah #787352
Bombmaniac, the way the system is set up, and with the relative prosperity we have, there is a certain level of literacy that most boys can achieve, which will take having some beis medrash (maybe use another acronym) experience necessary. Sad to say, an experience like yours means a kid’s not with the program. Nothing against such kids, I’m proudly related to some. Just saying that they’re off the beaten track, and the track, to some degree, is good for a good many boys. It’s not being given permission to work that’s an issue. There are so many people who have maximized their learning, by working/learning, from a younger age and ashreihem.
I suspect current Gateshead residents aren’t on the net.July 5, 2011 4:32 pm at 4:32 pm in reply to: Two points from this weeks Yated – Kollel & Agudah #787348
I like Rabbi Birnbaum. He’s had a lot of good stuff, out of the bos stuff to say. And out of town is a great place to live and raise a family. Kollelim are booming in our city and frankly, I don’t know where the funding is coming from. It can’t all be coming from the gevirim.
And as for Rabbi Bloom, he is an adom gadol. I am grateful for the clarity he gives us on so many issues. At the risk of inciting all sorts of ire, often I read him and I leave with, now I know what to think on this issue. I haven’t read the current Yated yet but am looking forward. I’m sure that Rabbi Bloom thought long and hard before sharing his thoughts with the olom. (Interesting dovetailing with R’ Avi Shulman’s column of the same week on airing linen.)
P.S. Since I can’t edit: the 8 minute rule is for my oven. Try it in yours the second batch you take out. Wait a few minutes and you’ll see what I mean. Your oven might need 9 minutes, or if you like crunchy cookies, 10.
Levana Kirschenbaum has one, without margarine, in one of her cookbooks. A few tips: measure oil carefully, you don’t want to go overboard, and if the oven is truly preheated take them out at exactly 8 minutes.
I’m on an email list that sends out short and sweet messages from Rabbi Avigdor Miller, and just read a great one about the fourth of July, especially in late 20th century America; I think we can extrapolate a kal v’chomer for early 21st century America.