Forum Replies Created
March 20, 2015 6:00 pm at 6:00 pm in reply to: Prayers to find Bashert? #1122626
I agree with sm29, too.
If you want a man who is pious, work on your own piety. If you want a man who is kind, improve your own kindness. If you want a man with a beard . . . well, let me not advise that.December 10, 2014 5:41 am at 5:41 am in reply to: Cute Quotes #1046989
if you don’t laugh at some of these jokes, the terrorists have won.December 10, 2014 5:35 am at 5:35 am in reply to: Crown Heights stabbing #1047003
I don’t think that will happen this time. THis is fundamentally different than the other killings they have been protesting. This man was armed and had done harm, and was a genuine threat to the police at the scene.
Let’s hope that all see the difference.December 10, 2014 3:54 am at 3:54 am in reply to: Is Being Right More Important than getting along? #1053074
it’s like the eternal question that husbands everywhere ask themselves: Do you wanna be right, or do you wanna be happy?
P.S. it’s better to be happy with someone you live or work with.December 9, 2014 6:31 am at 6:31 am in reply to: Cute Quotes #1046980
Time wounds all heels.December 9, 2014 6:27 am at 6:27 am in reply to: Calling uncles and aunts without using their title #1136747
Call me what you will. As long as it’s respectful and affectionate. Uncle and Aunt are terms taht are both of those things, and now and then I call an older person who is not my uncle or aunt those names.
As for my own uncles and aunts, first time I see them in a visit, I will use their title and first name. Subsequently, I will call them by their familiar name.
I’m almost sixty, when I was young every adult had to be addressed by a title. Cousin X, Coach Y, Mr. Z. Now it’s different.
When introducing a friend to my mother, I ask her how she would like to be introduced. Until 15 years ago, she would say, Mrs. R. Now she asks to be introduced by her first name. I do honor my mother’s request.
On the other hand, several friends’ parents have invited me to address them by their first name. That feels rather odd, since I have known them for decades as Mr. S.June 24, 2014 2:37 am at 2:37 am in reply to: What is a reasonable amount for dh to spend on gambling addiction #1020879
but it’s the nature of addictions that they eventually get out of hand. We all have imperfect weak moments, and the addictive urges are so strong. If he starts out at $600/month, and runs out of money on the 15th of the month, what’s going to happen? eventually?June 24, 2014 2:05 am at 2:05 am in reply to: What is a reasonable amount for dh to spend on gambling addiction #1020877
is he winning or losing? If he’s winning, well . . .
like the man who goes to the psychiatrist and tells him that his wife thought she was a hen for many years.
The psychiatrist asks why he didn’t come for help sooner.
he answers, “we needed the eggs.”June 24, 2014 2:02 am at 2:02 am in reply to: Kosher Non-Jewish Books #1022072
I only read coloring books.June 24, 2014 1:54 am at 1:54 am in reply to: Why is corn on the cob not kosher??? #1021336
will the corn from my garden be kosher? I have a sign up near the stalks asking bugs to leave the property.April 4, 2014 5:38 am at 5:38 am in reply to: Moshiach Rumors? #1074803
Those who tell don’t know. Those who know don’t tell.March 9, 2014 2:17 pm at 2:17 pm in reply to: Is it appropriate to propose at kotel #1007493
what better place to consider starting a new jewish home.February 7, 2014 4:52 am at 4:52 am in reply to: How much money for kids to destroy stuff? #1004104
When I was a teenager, I volunteered at a recycling depot. I got to spend many satisfying mornings smashing bottles in a dumpster with an iron pipe. Got out most of my aggressions that way.February 7, 2014 4:50 am at 4:50 am in reply to: Marrying for money #1002453
This can be the most painful way to get money. You may be better off taking up bank robbing or hard labor.January 29, 2014 5:19 am at 5:19 am in reply to: Funny quotes #1001197
Always be yourself; who is better qualified?January 16, 2014 4:38 pm at 4:38 pm in reply to: Funny quotes #1001170
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend.
Inside of a aog, it’s too dark to read.
– Groucho Marx.January 16, 2014 4:26 pm at 4:26 pm in reply to: Life is like a #1003640
Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
– Tom LehrerJanuary 14, 2014 5:19 am at 5:19 am in reply to: Ketchup-lovers-and- haters alike, I have a question for you! #1019872
Ummmmm. Grape Soda, that’s the only food or drink I can think of that is not improved by a dollop of ketchup.January 14, 2014 5:18 am at 5:18 am in reply to: My Rebbi ZT"L was niftar and I'm lost #998265
very sorry for your loss.January 12, 2014 12:09 am at 12:09 am in reply to: The joys of ketchup! #998194
every food and beverage, except perhaps Grape Soda, is improved by ketchup. I come from the Bronx, where it’s the universal condiment and proof of Hashem’s love of humanity.January 6, 2014 4:47 am at 4:47 am in reply to: Nook Nuki/kindle erasing Hashem #1096032
you never have to delete a book there. You can just archive it – once you’ve bought it, you can always download it again.January 6, 2014 4:37 am at 4:37 am in reply to: Antivirus Anyone #997341
Garlic, lots of garlic. You will have no friends and visitors, but at least you won’t be sick.January 3, 2014 3:44 am at 3:44 am in reply to: Couplets, haikus and any short poems by weird people #1209836
a short poem by Ogden Nash, expressing is feelings about the borough of my birth:
No, thonks.December 26, 2013 5:25 am at 5:25 am in reply to: Vaccinations are bad? #995826
The hevrah kadisha will get their business from you one way or the other. The choice is soon, or when you’re 120. I’m not sure that’s a valid argument, since you will increase the future parnassah of the CK even if you get vaccinated.
As always, I love your sense of humor.
Our Creator has given us means by which human suffering can be decreased, that is an act of love. Refusing that gift of diminished suffering may be an insult to the Giver.
answer: A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.December 23, 2013 9:20 pm at 9:20 pm in reply to: Meanings of the names Zelig and Zalman #997024
There are very few genuinely Hebrew names. Most come from other cultures and languages. Avram, Sarai, MOSHE (comes from Egyptian, you know), Yenta (French), etc.
What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with?December 23, 2013 5:16 am at 5:16 am in reply to: Where is __________ #996029
where has ronrsr been? I haven’t heard a peep from him in years.
Nice to see you again!December 23, 2013 4:48 am at 4:48 am in reply to: CR Humor Bureau #1029224
Frogs say, “Time’s fun when you’re having flies.”March 21, 2013 5:23 pm at 5:23 pm in reply to: Happy PI Day! #1228714
It’s like Feh, only more greek.March 14, 2013 9:49 pm at 9:49 pm in reply to: Happy PI Day! #1228710
Don’t be fooled. Pi Day is really July 22. Archimedes approximation of 22/7 is actually much closer than 3.14May 10, 2012 6:48 pm at 6:48 pm in reply to: Jews forced off Jet Blue Flight #916230
Where did you get this information in the first place? It was not picked up by any news outlets. Are you absolutely sure it’s true before you defame JetBlue?May 4, 2012 2:07 am at 2:07 am in reply to: Vanishing posters. Who do you miss? Lets get them back #872649
I miss ronrsr.March 1, 2012 7:43 am at 7:43 am in reply to: Leap Day – February 29 #856677
salaried people worked today for free.
salespeople with quotas got an extra day to make the quota.
hourly workers got to make some extra dough this month.January 9, 2012 2:17 am at 2:17 am in reply to: The coffee room (un)official dictionary. #1063746
Cha-cha — Lots of cheerful help available.January 6, 2012 4:48 am at 4:48 am in reply to: Where's the snow??? #850062
you may keep it for yourself.December 28, 2011 6:59 am at 6:59 am in reply to: Hebrew Fonts #839939
Myfonts.com has a very nice Frank Ruehl Hebrew for just $25 – I have some others, too, on my computer upstairs.
Some are free – particularly if you have Microsoft Windows already, I believe you can use any of the Hebrew fonts that come with Hebrew Windows, many of which were designed by Shmuel Guttman, whom I once had the honor of working with.December 20, 2011 11:00 pm at 11:00 pm in reply to: Kim Jong Il – Jewish? #836878
that’s funny, you don’t look Jewish.December 20, 2011 10:33 pm at 10:33 pm in reply to: Kim Jong Il – Jewish? #836875
This information comes from a credible source. I started the rumor myself.December 20, 2011 4:45 am at 4:45 am in reply to: Brain teaser – price of oil #839440
is this a test?
I like his music. I have no thoughts about him personally.
When I eat a good omelette, I do not wish to meet the chicken who layed the egg, so I can evaluate her personality.December 14, 2011 7:32 am at 7:32 am in reply to: Anyone know of any frum police officers? #846570
The ideal police force is one that has representatives of every group in the city. Then it is more like a citizens’ police force than a military enforcement unit.December 13, 2011 10:58 pm at 10:58 pm in reply to: Anyone know of any frum police officers? #846565
I think it’s very important to have some frum police officers.December 8, 2011 7:00 am at 7:00 am in reply to: Anyone know of any frum police officers? #846559
there is also a fraternal society within the NYPD of Jewish officers called the Shomrim. It was founded in 1924.
The goal of the society “so that Law Enforcement Officers of the Jewish faith may join together for the Welfare of all.”
Most famously Capt. Max Finkelstein was appointed by Fiorello Laguardia in 1938 to oversee the security of visiting Nazi/German officials and to guard the German Embassy, Consulate, and to keep an eye on other suspected Nazi sympathizers. The entire NYPD security staff for the German Consulate was Jewish. This is what happens when you have a good Jewish Mayor like Fiorello Laguardia.
(source: “Police Detail Made Up Solely of Jews Will Guard the German Officials Here”. The New York Times: p. 9. 17 November 1938)
LaGuardia’s fine attention to the police detail was probably inspired by a decision by Theodore Roosevelt, when he was NY Police Commissioner to guard an unwelcome antisemitic preacher with 40 Jewish police officers.
For more on the current activities of the Shomrim Society, seeDecember 8, 2011 6:54 am at 6:54 am in reply to: Girls wearing boys cloths? #834222
it costs less at the cleaners to have a men’s shirt cleaned.December 8, 2011 4:59 am at 4:59 am in reply to: Who thinks we should reinstate the JDL? #833699
In Massachusetts, you can’t carry mace or pepper spray without a firearms license.December 7, 2011 11:15 pm at 11:15 pm in reply to: Who thinks we should reinstate the JDL? #833697
There is a terrible thing going on in Ohio. Amish men and women are being attacked and forcibly having their hair cut, and then photographed in their unshorn state. I am not kidding about this.
It is a horrible crime, since Amish law and custom forbids men shaving after marriage and being photographed is consider an unacceptable act of pride.
What if this same thing were done in Boro Park?
Perhaps we should send the new JDL for a test run in Ohio?December 7, 2011 8:26 pm at 8:26 pm in reply to: Best Classic Songs #833996
under different circumstances today would be Harry Chapin’s 69th birthday.December 6, 2011 1:11 am at 1:11 am in reply to: Graphology #833176
no, you can tell the broad parameters of a personality by a person’s handwriting.
the best application of graphology I have ever heard of was my cousin wrote to Ben Gurion in the 1960’s when she was first visitig Israel. She told him she was a graphologist (she was, as an act i the Catskills) and offered to do a reading for the retired prime minister.
He invited her to his cottage on Sde Boker and she got to meet the great man himself, all in exchange for a graphological analysis.December 6, 2011 1:04 am at 1:04 am in reply to: where can i find really good deals… #833211
the best bargains are found midweek – prices tend to rise slightly on weekends. Tuesday afternoon is when the bargains go out and the prices are the lowest.
This is not my observation, it is from an article on buying tickets cheap. In my experience, it is so, too.