always runs with scissors fast

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  • in reply to: A Lack Of Sensitivity #795198

    I am sorry to write this, because I am probablly going to ruffle a lot of feathers but I went to a modern orthdox/chassider chasuna in Boro park in the past 6 months, and I was shocked. I felt my stomache clenching and I wanted to run out of there, i felt my soul was screaming.

    There was a complete disregard and lack of sensitivity of tnzius. Meaning that ok although technically speaking a neckline may have been kosher but the dress was so tight, the shoes attention seeking, 3 inches little points, panty hose that are so thin it does not look like she has any. The band was stationed at the entrance of the ballroom and ladies were dancing in clear view of the men who were standing on their side of the stage.Obviously thriving off the idea that they are attractive and enticing.

    Men were watching ladies dancing. The ladies had on provactive, head-turning tight dresses. LOng sheitals and tons of makeup.

    I felt weak and sick. I felt nauseaus watching a woman posing attractively for photos in public in the lobby for her husband who was shooting the camera. Of course turning heads.

    Mamish I couldn’t eat the food.

    I felt I had to get out of there.

    WOrld of difference between that and the chasunas in Williamsburg or Monroe!

    in reply to: Question about the "no prying" rule #794457

    I always think of the Mods as the police of the place.

    Or like the damp towel like say when you are a teenager and having fun with your friends but then your mother sticks her head in to say something, and then you’re like…ooh.

    in reply to: What is the funnest thing you'll be doing this summer? #795023

    what does ursula mean?

    Just my opinion

    You are all aruging amongst yourselves when actually these are screen names are just faceless nameless people in cyberland??? Its a waste of time, no?

    and “always here” has got to be English- her use & knowledge of the language, is impeccible. not too many americans know what means a dolt.

    in reply to: Why is evil striking us? #792037

    I agree with msseeker. Satmar has true Torah Ideals all the way and is pure through and through.

    in reply to: Best ways to check out a prospective tenant #790882

    Absolute best way is to interview them…in THEIR CURRENT APT!

    I had a landlord come to visit me in my apt for the preview…he saw I was clean and put together. Its the best way to get a “feel” of the person.

    in reply to: What if you thought you knew… #791084

    ANYTHING that you might suspect….but which your friend has chosen to not yet share with you should not be brought up by you until they want to share that with you.

    people are entitled to privacy and to not share everything with friends. In other words its nobody’s business if they have something. If they want you to know they will tell you.

    in reply to: Are you afraid of getting old? #797016

    bombmaniac….do u prefer rural


    in reply to: What is the funnest thing you'll be doing this summer? #795009

    Haifa, you saw that I CAN write the world English with a Capitol “E” because in one instance I did so! So my point is that it is not that I am incapable, but rather didn’t know that grammer, punctuation and spelling really counted in the CR!

    WHoa,, I will have to watch myself around. But why am I the only poster you are picking on ?

    And whats wrong with he sentence:

    that would all make for an interesting title to write an essay entitled “what I did on my summer vacation” for a class.

    Tell me. It makes sense as far as cognition is concerned. I mean I expect you can figure out what I am saying no?

    in reply to: Are you afraid of getting old? #797009


    You asked me a question RE: the word Meanwhilst.

    Here. Look it up on ! I didnt make it up. It really exists!


    The Definition for Meanwhilst :

    At the same time at another place; during the intervening time. A classier term for Meanwhile.

    Bob can get the beer. Meanwhilst, we will watch the beginning of the movie without him.

    buy meanwhilst mugs & shirts

    meanwhile while whilst synonym classy

    in reply to: What is the funnest thing you'll be doing this summer? #794988

    Ha ha ha – a girl from haifa has to correct my english!. Since becoming Chassidishe my English is as good – its true or maybe its mommy brain?.

    Derech Ha Melech, it’s not that having a baby is boring, it’s just that I ACTUALLY WANT TO GO SOMEWHERE.

    besides for the nice view from the surgical table in the 4 star O.R where i recieved 1st class treatment and later recuperated , and that DEFINATELY was refreshing as i had many quiet hours to reflect and have hakirus hatoiv for all the brachas in my life, and feeling thankful that i am still amongst the living- being that i just went through GIVING BIRTH …. which is a life & DEATH situation.

    that would all make for an interesting title to write an essay entitled “what I did on my summer vacation” for a class.

    in reply to: Why do I feel like I am still trying to Prove Myself to them? #789458

    Wolf :

    Your post brought tears to my eyes. Thanks

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790160

    basket of radishes. go figure. you want to be a vegetarian! lol

    But seriously, I commend and support your decision because my husband and I basically hold this way. He is more strict about it, than I. He only eats chicken and only on shabbos or yom tov.

    I was a vegetarian for over 7 years, and at times a vegan and macro biotic nut. I was happy when I started eating fish again though. It helped me mentally and emotionally.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790155

    I am a spiritual extremist by choice. I took the ultra ultra orthodox upon myself, by choice. I live amongst a sect that is known to be shtark and extreme. However, I do not regret that. Its just that sometimes I feel like I am lonely at the top.

    Sometimes I feel like I was sitting on a landscape and that I worked very hard with a scissors to cut myself and landscape off from the surrounding map but now I am isolated floating .alone.

    neighbors don’t replace family and ..whatever. sorry to complain.

    in reply to: Should one mourn the death of a Jew no matter who? #789109

    600 Kilo Did Barney the dinosaur die too? Did I miss something?

    in reply to: Should one mourn the death of a Jew no matter who? #789108

    I learned this from “daily hilchos bein Adom L’chavero”: Under : Love your Fellow as Yourself:

    We are obligated to love and do chessed for all

    people of unsound mind and even people who are no

    longer alive. Acts of kindness to the deceased (such

    as burying and eulogizing them) are of particular value, because we perform them without any expectation of reward.

    There is no mitzvah to love akum (although in some cases, for the

    On the other hand, the Torah demands that we be caring even toward

    someone who is to be executed by the Sanhedrin, in which case

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790153

    Wow.. Derech Hamelech, YOu are my Rebbe. LOL

    Ok that is exaggerating, but what I just read that you wrote gave me a good new perspective and also the goosebumps.

    That is really neat.

    Its great how you can come up with these mooshils. Like having eaten porridge and now complaining about eating off golden plates.

    How do you do it? ARe you a maggid shiur?

    in reply to: Why do I feel like I am still trying to Prove Myself to them? #789454

    I thank all of you for your kind and wise words of consolation and clarity, but my favorite response was Derech Hamelechs’.

    I actually do feel myself slipping into clinical depression from this “giving it all up” business.

    in reply to: What have you "given up" to be frum? #790148

    I liked wanderingchana’s post, and mostly I can say it goes for me as well. We gave up ties with old friends, neighbors, acquaintances, and broke lose from the family. Breaking all ties.

    I gave up goyisher good rock and roll. I gave up my long hair, my freedom, and bookshelf filled with philosophies. I threw out all my kids’ fairy tales and curious george books. I threw out lots of clothes, photos, and non kosher dishes.

    I turned in my license to freedom and free spiritedness. Stopped hitchhiking across America and searching for happiness. I stopped emailing links to the past, and stopped watching “All in the Family” with Archie Bunker.

    I stopped being a fanatic about recycling and eating an organic vegetarian diet. I stoppped dreaming about the sculptures I’d make, or the tapestries I’d embroider.

    I gained a new perspective when things went wrong. I stopped blaming everyone and everything and saw it was Hashem.

    I gave up my name I had grown up by, and stopped riding in the front seat, for tznius.

    In short, I have not given up enough. I want my life and my soul to be a korban offering.

    in reply to: Feel like no one cares! #788739

    Aries I think you`re one of the kindest and smartest people in the CR.

    in reply to: Do you play with toys? #789351

    Nothing beats digging in sand on a beach! Not even a sandbox

    in reply to: Why aren't you lookin @ ur Kallah? #788049

    Legen-dary, your description of this chasan sounds like my husbands’ type of personality. He definately acts very shy and modest and humble and temimesdik in public. For example, in public he will not lean close in to me when we’re talking, he stands at a distance.

    During our chuppa and mitzva tanse he did not look at me either. Its a modesty thing.

    in reply to: Do you play with toys? #789345

    OP you have brought up an emotional topic for me. Toys. Or, more precisely One Toy, I shall never forget. When I was 8 years old in 1983 I once bought from a yard sale a gorgeous hand made knitted doll that had been made probablly for a baby gift, and never used. I paid .25 cents for it and was so proud and pleased with her. I still can recall vividly how she smelled of a fabric softener of some sort. She had that fresh clean scent of a baby. I had a name for her. I kept her all these years until recently. …let me explain…

    As I grew up I generally brought her out less and less, but still kept her near – like in the closet. And she somehow retained that scent. Once in a while, even as a married woman I would bring her out and take a good whiff, of her, pushing my nose deep into her belly, trying to recapture that comforting smell she one had, or still had, or maybe it was just my imagination. Sometimes when I was emotional, or feeling sad, misunderstood or overwhelmed or insecure, I would sleep with her under my arm.

    However, it really bothered my husband, I could tell. He was like ” Grow up?” So I tried not to do it. I told myself it was immature afterall.

    But over time, I had come to realize that whatever associations I have with her and my past, and my childhood were sad recollections, sad hopes and dreams never materialized, and so i wanted to heal, and throw it all away. To get on with my life. So one day I decided to throw her out. I put her in the garbage erev pesach this past yomtov. I dont think i should regret it, but when i saw her little sweater remained behind in the toy cupboard with my kids doll clothes, I got emotional recently. I wasn’t trying to punish her by throwing her away. I just really wanted to get past those sad years of my childhood. And not feel like a helpless little girl anymore.

    And funny enough….even until now, whenver I lay sad in my bed at night, feeling misunderstood, and insecure I remember her with a terrible pain and regret for having thrown her out. And I wish I could smell her and feel her under my arm.

    Otherwise I really don’t think of her. However, I haven’t mentioned her name here in this small story of mine, because it will upset me. And I might get all regretful again.

    But I liked how you mentioned you have silly putty by your bedside. I might get myself some for when I have stress.

    in reply to: Have you ever seen a Ghost? I mean a real one. #781581

    Happiest, thanks for the apology.

    On the note that you made, I would like to reflect and ask you about your experience, if you are sure that you were the only one on that hospital floor they were asking that question to, regarding the hearing of voices that weren’t there and seeing things too? Maybe YOU JUST THOUGHT everyone got asked that question.

    When I was a nurse on psychiatry, I observed a nurse ask a patient if he has been hearing any voices lately. And his response was hilarious. He said “Yeah, the nurses”.

    in reply to: Have you ever seen a Ghost? I mean a real one. #781579

    I am so disappointed that most people answering this thread either made fun of me and don’t believe in it!

    Thanks HaleiVi for explaining that it can be ! And whoa mazal I totally believe in what you’re saying!

    I think frum yidden who have had kosher mezuzahs all their life would not have had an opportunity for such an experience. But all I can tell you is not so many years ago, in our grandparents generation in Eastern Europe, this sort of awareness of souls (ghosts) was normal, people held an awareness of it, and even there are many stories of paranormal happenings, even amongst goyim from those decades. But somehow Hollywood has cashed in on it, and turned it into a weird thing and no body believes in ghosts now.

    in reply to: Have you ever seen a Ghost? I mean a real one. #781561

    ha ha ha ha ha laughing very hard from deiyezooger. VERY FUNNY

    in reply to: Same gender marriage- immoral? #781314

    I believe that even for goyim it is immoral. I think it falls under one of the 7 Noahide laws not to do sexual immorality.

    I think that men who claim to “feel inside themselves gay” and feminine or whatever, either are a gilgul of a opposite gender (female soul) or they just need serious psychological counselling

    My question though is why and how can in today’s society they live openly together with no shame? I would never want to reveal such a thing about myself! Never mind do that!

    in reply to: wife's name #782640

    Simcha I would definately only ever refer to her as “My wife” or “the boss” or “the chief” or “my rebbetzin”.

    Its not correct that they should be acquainted, friendly and heimishe with her and refer to her by her first name, right?

    in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781406

    oh aries that is hilarious. I am glad to hear other people’s experiences with their “grown up children”. I hope I can take it all well, as you have described in your self laughing it off.

    in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781402

    zeeskite: YEs I definately have noticed all these “changes” going on within her, as you mention, since becoming a Kallah.

    Baruch Hashem its part and parcel of being healthy and growing up.

    in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781391

    thanks a mamin, oomis, ezrathashem, aries, i love coffee, ilovetheholyland.

    I feel other mothers out there actually understand me!

    Oh and there was one more painful point to this conversation I forgot to tell you. I offered “Well I can take care of your baby, I mean I could open a daycare in my home, and then baby would be with bubby all day…” And her response ?

    “Ohhhhhhh….no thanks!” as if I were the last person she would leave a child with.!

    I just think the whole thing is so hilarious i feel like calling up my mother and saying I FINALLY UNDERSTAND YOU!!!!

    in reply to: A child's cry – How divorce ravages children #780918

    Whoa, take it easy guys. No one is painting mothers carte blanche.

    I just made a statement about a hypothetical situation that can and does happen sometimes.

    WHich by the way is a very usful tactic in getting rid of the EX, for some. And is very common in America. And which goes undetected by Courts and the professionals involved, for the most part, but the damage is deep. And which does exist. Burying your head under the sand about it will not change it.

    in reply to: Who feels bad for the moderators? #780925

    I do think of them from time to time, and feel sorry for them. Its a dangerous job. I say this because they are at risk for being swamped in internet, and wanting to break free from sitting at their desk, but having a committment to moderate the CR, so they have a job to do, and so they find themselves reading more and more useless information, and getting more and more involved with something that at the end of the day, they ask themselves “Was that just bittl z’man, or it is just me…?”

    in reply to: A child's cry – How divorce ravages children #780914

    There is an expression that goes “When there is a divorce – they don’t go handing out sweets”. Meaning that there are never parties, or compliments but usually bitter accusations and terrible allegations, one against the other.

    I love coffee: If you have been the victim of parental alienation you could always try to investigate the situation objectively as an adult, wherein sometimes the mother tries to paint the father in a bad light, and seemingly “protects the children from him”. Where as it may be far from the truth.

    Always give the other side a chance to explain why they broke up and hear out your father.

    Google Parental Alienation.

    I should know – I was a victim of it.

    in reply to: Girls are from Venus #781726

    I believe that in the Gemara, there is reference made to women being of a “different species”. Men are very different. It takes patience to understand us.

    But its all worth it.

    in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781372

    am yisrael chai :

    That post of the wife who was abused by her alcoholic husband is NOT my mother! My father may have liked drinking but he was a funny drunk and not a violent one!

    I don’t think that is appropriate to compare my daughter’s perception of all I did for her, to how my mother not being more than she could be.

    But i see your point, that at the end of the day, no matter what choices we make even if they were hard for us, and self sacrificing- we don’t necessarily get a thank you from our kids, but a slap in the face.

    in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781366

    oh popa are you ever intuitive and perceptive….let me tell you..


    in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781364

    m in Israel, I apologize. I really do. You eloquently painted the harsh reality I have (thank g-d) never had to realize.

    I cannot imagine that it would be easy after all.

    I guess that I made that conclusion without thinking too much into what it must really be like. I was thinking naive that if you don’t want to go to work- then dont! But you do have bills to pay after all!

    And I admire the dedication and cheylik in Torah learning that you have doing so. I just am not from this type of thinking.

    in reply to: A child's cry – How divorce ravages children #780901

    As a child whose parents divorced, as a little girl, I can tell you the OP as written above is true. I suffered very much with out my father. Even as an adult today, who has built her own life, with a family of her own, I sometimes cry and remember how awful it felt to lose him. How I loved my father.

    Even with his unacceptable behaviors, and addiction to alcohol, if only my mother had have had the strength of charachter to be patient and guide him I am sure we would have benefited from having him remain in our family home as a unit rather than the breakdown what occured.

    And even as he was … a child…he was still perfect to me.

    I love coffee: You are correct in what you say as far as children of divorce having a close connection with Hashem, I have often thought that it was a bracha I wasn’t raised in my aunt’s kind calm homey atmosphere as Life would have been Perfect in itself, and I wouldn’t have had to search for G-d.

    Sof dvar, You are right in what you say, that the screaming in a home, is abusive to children. I remember as a child literally feeling physical pains in my body when angry words were thrown back and forth. I felt as if shars of glass were piercing through me, the pure medium.

    in reply to: child left in car seat- how to prevent? #795664

    Dssdyochid, that is hilarious! Somebody already took my idea! and so fast too!

    I hardly read other people’s posts

    in reply to: Who thinks I am Joseph? #826076

    Joseph, the only real ACID TEST for us to find out whether or not you are who you claim to be would be :

    “Is your father still alive”?


    in reply to: child left in car seat- how to prevent? #795656

    If anyone wants an idea for making an invention, someone ought to invent a little gadget like a gps, that sits somewhere in your car, and when it is alerted to the fact you’ve shut off the motor and are preparing to exit the vehicle, it makes a loud announcement “CHECK YOUR CAR SEAT FOR ANY CHILDREN”. as a reminder.

    OR mothers DO NOT SEND CHILDREN OFF WITH FATHERS. Men are not made for multi tasking.

    in reply to: who do u think has 2 names in cr and wat r they? #780289

    Real Brisker The only thing I can guess is that you keep a little book by your computer of all the members you have not seen online for a while, or/and you have a list of those who were probablly ousted.

    in reply to: who do u think has 2 names in cr and wat r they? #780285

    Hmm who was that?

    in reply to: who do u think has 2 names in cr and wat r they? #780283

    real brisker Go for IT!

    in reply to: Are you allowed to buy cut up fruits in a non jewish store? #778542

    The problem with cut up fruits is the knife they were using. I WOULD NEVER buy half a watermelon from a non jew store because what else was that knife used to cut? THey may have brought it from the back of the grocery where they have a little deli, they may wash it in the same sink etc.

    NEver mind kashrus, but at least in a yiddisher store, we know/hope/expect that a yid has to wash with a tepel after making!

    in reply to: SHY PUBLIC EATER #778120

    kapusta the fun part is the BMQ8HR

    in reply to: Do They Know Too Much? #811444

    I heard a very funny cheder story.

    In williamsburg a caretaker from the Satmar cheyder asked some 10 or 12 yr old boys “How can I say in Yiddish GOOD MORNING to the rabbi?”

    So the boys told him “Ich bin a putz”.

    So the next day they are all sitting in class learning and the caretaker/janitor comes along with his mop in the hall, outside the classroom door and gives a big smile and waves to the Rebbe calling out “ICH BIN A PUTZ”

    The rebbe knew the boys were behind this.

    in reply to: Share Your Worst Date Ever! #778031

    smartcookie, I am! Even I don’t know how I pulled that off?

    I thought he’d think its hilarious just to ride a see saw.

    But when I figured out I weighed a few more pounds than him, I couldn’t resist, I just wouldn’t let him get down.

    I guess its a good thing we married cause that would be very embarrassing to remembmer that weird girl who he went out on a date with…now we laugh.

    I was quite immature.

    in reply to: Need remedy for crazy pregnancy hormones during last weeks…. #777684

    a mamin, thanks for your concern and care!

    I have started to do less. Just chill out . Learn I need a nap for at least 1 hr everyday. I have learned I don’t have to be as productive in the kitchen with baking and whatever is not necessary.

    I have started to really enjoy doing nothing.

    Of course the kids still get on my nerves. THey are always screaming or fighting, demanding everything from one minute to the next. But for the good part of the day they are out of the house so its only that 5-8 pm witching hour. I try to set up the kiddie pool, provide play doh activties, coloring etc.

    I try to tell myself “Let’s see jsut how patient you can be” as we obviously know how nervous I can get! LOL

    Thanks for all your input.

Viewing 50 posts - 551 through 600 (of 652 total)